Disclaimer: nothing is mine, no profit made.
I have no beta and so all mistakes are mine. I wanted to try something different, I haven't written anything in a while and thought I would try and challenge myself with the use of second person narrative. Also there is no plot line at all within this, just drabble. Rizzles of course, reviews are appreciated.
You watch her brows furrow as she thinks, her smile widening as you provide her with the answers she needs to solve the case. Her eyes light up and she looks at you in amazement. One million thoughts flash through your mind and you begin to understand, the blur of the lines, you're caught in the crossfire. The mind works in peculiar ways and you always thought you understood the ways in which yours operated. But the realisation has dawned on you within an instant, confusing you and enlightening you and terrifying you.
You make your excuses and you turn and you run. You hear her call for you, concern laced within her husky voice but you don't stop. You don't even look back, you just carry on running.
Tears are falling freely down your cheeks, you wonder if you can go back. There is no going back for you, not now you know. Her face will haunt you in your sleep, dreams and nightmares all revolving around the fact you will be alone forever and the reason you get up in the morning will no longer be a thirst for knowledge nor a desire to help. You wonder when it began, when your feelings crossed the boundaries between friendship and something more; this does nothing but confuse you further and you need to get away from this unfamiliar feeling.
You don't go home because she is there, everything there is a reminder of her. The fridge you make sure is stocked with her beer, the guest room that is actually her room, and the trainers she left by the door this morning after your daily run. You go to the one other place, other than her, that has always felt safe and you sit and lose yourself in your thoughts.
You're in love with her. Looking back at your life you think about Ian and consider Garrett. Ian – the love of your life, or so you thought, he treat you like a princess but he left. Another realization comes sweeping in when you think of him, what you feel for her doubles and triples anything you ever felt for him. He was there and you were there and you were together but that was all, you love him and always will but you weren't and won't ever love him. He was easy and he left and you were okay with that because your heart didn't break, and you didn't let him in and he didn't try. She didn't ask, she just worked her way through the walls stacked around your heart with ease. She came in and tore them down, she made you laugh and accepted you and you know she loves you. You love her too, but not in the same way.
The vibrations of your phone pull you out of your reverie but you ignore the call. You know who it is without looking and you can't face hearing her voice. You need to be alone to rebuild the walls and try to calm your shaking hands and the rapid beating of your heart.
You look up at the sky and your face is a map of confusion as you see the stars peering back at you. Glancing at your watch you calculate you've been on this bench for five hours and thirty-four minutes. A heavy sigh is released from your mouth, your brain has not processed nor made sense of anything and you feel no lighter than when you arrived. Your elbows find your knees and your head falls into your hands and your tear-stained cheeks are finally hidden from the world. You sit there a while longer and ponder your next move. Eventually you stand because you cannot stay here forever. Fingers attempt to smooth out the wrinkles in your skirt but they can't so instead they try to remove evidence of tears from your cheeks but they fail at that too and so you resign yourself to a walk home filled with humiliation to end the day.
Turning your head to the left you see a mass of black curls sitting on the bench across from you, long legs folded under one another and nervous hands interacting. Her eyes find yours but she doesn't make any effort to move. She's waiting, you realize. She doesn't want to push you so she's waiting for you to come to her and you go. Your right foot moves and your left foot follows and slowly but surely you make your way to her. You find yourself in front of her, your eyes find her and you see they're filled with so many emotions but you can't place any of them. Instead you look away and your eyes begin to glass over and fresh tears trickle out of them.
She stands and reaches out, touches your chin, turning your face to look at her and you do. Again, her eyebrows furrow but this time with concern and her fingertips move to softly brush away your tears.
Jane.
You say it so softly you wonder if you've even said it at all and how she responds is not with words. She just pulls you in and closes her arms around your back and you feel safer than you've ever felt before. She holds you and comforts you and doesn't ask any questions and you love her like you've never loved anything. It's a fierce kind of love and you know it won't go away. There's no going back for you now but do you tell her and win her or do you tell her and lose her? Is it worth the risk of a broken heart and a broken friendship or do you keep it inside and never know?
You decide on the former as the atmosphere is thick and you're in the moment and if it goes wrong you can blame it on today. So you break out of her arms and your fingers push those unruly strands of black hair behind her ears.
Jane.
All at once everything moulds together and your lips touch her cheek so close to where you want to place them but daren't. Not yet. You pull back and search her eyes for something you can distinguish – anything. You find something you hope you haven't imagined but you play on that anyway and your lips find hers and gently press. Chaste.
Again you pull away although you want nothing more than to taste that cherry chapstick again and again. Your eyes duck down and your cheeks flush slightly and you wait. The waiting is the worst part of your day you realise; your heart is thumping and your palms are sweaty and you don't ever remember being this nervous but you're here and she's here and you're hoping it will all work out okay.
After what feels like an eternity she chuckles and sighs a great sigh that matches your own from earlier. Her nose gently knocks against yours forcing her to look up and you and her chocolate eyes are filled with the love mirrored in your own.
Maura.
Lips collide and you look ridiculous because everything is a mess and your skirt is wrinkled and your mascara is all over your face and your hair is mussed. But everything is perfect and nothing matters because she is showering you with her kisses and her love and the chance you took has paid off.
She loves you.
Reviews would be nice, constructive criticism appreciated but please no flames.