Disclaimer: nothing that you recognise belongs to me.
It started with a spider.
Not a particularly large one, but big and hairy enough to send Anna stumbling back from the pile of linen it had been nestled in, straight into the arms of Gawain who had been walking wearily down the same corridor. The big knight had caught her more by reflex than anything as she fell backwards, and set her back on her feet with a concerned frown.
"What's wrong, girl?" He had asked, narrowed eyes sweeping the corridor before looking at the woman in his arms with bemusement when he saw nothing amiss. When she only looked at him with wide eyes, he'd spoken slowly as though she might have been simple minded before setting her back on her feet. "What. Is. Wrong?"
She'd done nothing more than point at the arachnid that seemed to have shrunk in direct relation to her pride. Scuttling under a fold of material it looked no bigger than a thumbnail, and embarrassment and awe at being so close to the huge man that she had admired from afar, left her mute when he picked up the tiny creature in his huge hand, crossed the corridor and dropped it over the battlements.
"There, all gone." With a smile that briefly lit up his tired, face, he had picked up the linen Anna had dropped and handed it back to her. "If only all foes were so easily vanquished. Let me know if you come under attack again."
Realising that it was supposed to be a joke, Anna gave a feeble grin, and heart pounding, watched as Gawain walked away.
"You did what?" Vanora put her hands on her hips and glared at Anna, who was suddenly profoundly aware of why even Arthur was loathe to cross her. "You had him right there - rescuing you, and you didn't say anything to him?"
Anna squirmed uncomfortably under her friend's gaze. "Rescuing me is a bit much - it was a spider that's all."
Vanora snorted and gave the stew she was cooking a stir of such frustration that some of it splattered onto the floor. "Spiders, Woads, Saxons…. Doesn't matter. You were the damsel in distress and Gawain slayed the.. Whatever. And you didn't even say thank-you!"
"I tried!" Sidling away so that she wasn't in reach of the wooden spoon her friend was brandishing, Anna leant against the kitchen wall. The tavern was empty, only a couple of Vanora's younger children climbing on the tables under the pretext of cleaning them occupying the big barn, but it wouldn't be long before it would be filled with the hustle and bustle of soldiers, farmers, tradesmen and knights.
"Saying thank-you after he's out of earshot hardly counts as trying," Vanora said grumpily. "You like him - Gods knows I've seen you moon after him often enough.."
"I do not "moon"!" Anna exclaimed. "I might.."
"Dribble over, lust after - makes no difference." Vanora waved her spoon at Anna irritably, splashing the tavern cat with gravy and sending it scuttling under the table where it washed its paws with equal amounts of indignation and enjoyment. "You like him, and," she gave her friend a critical once over, "you're pretty enough to catch his eye if you didn't act like a terrified mouse every time he looks at you."
"Well he's not some farm hand that I can just walk up to and chat about the weather, is he?" Anna retorted. "The only time I really see him is when I'm collecting the laundry, and unless he's particularly keen on discussing the intricacies of blanket weaving, it doesn't lend itself to conversation let alone flirting."
Vanora gave a snort of disbelief. "That's because you're doing it wrong." Taking a moment to give her youngest son a bollocking for tipping over a table, Vanora hefted the pot of stew onto the table and dipped a spoon in to taste it. Smiling with satisfaction, she motioned her friend over and gave Anna the spoon to try her cooking.
"Delicious," Anna said honestly, licking her lips. "I can see why Lancelot keeps trying to tempt you away from Bors."
"Nah," Vanora gave a mock sigh and hoisted the bodice of her dress up. "Lancelot's more interested in my bosom than my talents in the kitchen. Anyway once you've had Bors you never really want anyone else. You should see him.- it's like a baby's arm…"
"Yeah, yeah." Anna interrupted hastily. "You've told me before. But what do I do about Gawain?"
Taking a moment to mull over the question, a wicked smile slowly spread across Vanora's face. "He said to let him know if you came under attack again, didn't he?"
"Well yes," Anna looked confused. "But unless you are thinking of kidnapping a couple of Woads and hiding them in my room, which I would rather you didn't do, I don't see how that helps me."
"No need for Woads." Vanora's smile was so broad and bright that there was almost no need for candles to light the tavern. "I'm thinking of something a bit smaller…
Two days later, Anna found herself once again in the corridor of the fort, her arms filled with two chambers worth of dirty linen. This time however she had made an attempt at making herself attractive; her hair was well brushed and tucked neatly into a bun, her face scrubbed so that her cheeks glowed pink. She had stopped short of staining her lips pink with blackberry juice - such things were a bit improper for a woman of almost twenty five years, but she would have been lying if she had denied considering doing it. The only thing that would have marked her as anything but a pretty woman fast approaching spinsterhood was the squirming bundle that resided in her pocket. Folding and re-folding the blankets she had dropped in the hallway, Anna waited until she caught the familiar shape of the blond knight approaching before dipping her hand in her pocket and dropping it on the blankets.
"Aaaargh" she screamed, in what she hoped was a credible attempt at fear. Windmilling her arms she stumbled backwards into Gawain's warm, solid bulk.
He caught her deftly, pushing her behind him, one hand reaching for his sword by reflex. Scanning the hallway and the room beside them, he saw nothing and gradually relaxed.
"Lady," he asked the woman who crept out behind him, "what scared you so?"
Feeling totally embarrassed and inwardly cursing Vanora, Anna pointed to the pile of blankets she had discarded. Upon it the mouse that Four had caught earlier that morning sat rather bewildered before hopping off and bolting into the next chamber where it would no doubt disappear down a crevice and eventually rejoin its brethren.
"Mouse." She said rather feebly.
"Mouse." Lowering his sword to his side, Gawain regarded the woman at his side with puzzlement.
Oh Gods, don't look at me like that. Anna inwardly cringed, but gave a decent approximation of a smile.
"It, er… Must have run away." It must have run away? At the back of her mind Anna imagined Vanora shaking her head in disbelief at such a pathetic attempt at conversation. "You probably scared it off." Thinking wildly for something better to add, she blurted out, "you are quite scary."
Wonderful. From the startled and somewhat hurt look on Gawain's face, she had said exactly the wrong thing, but tongue-tied by panic and awkwardness, Anna could do nothing but grab the armful of linen that she had dropped and scurry as fast as she could down the hall. Her hasty exit was hampered by unfortunate fact that she promptly tripped over and was once again hauled to her feet by the blond knight , whose face, this time showed a lot more amusement than Anna would have liked.
"Lady, every time I see you, you tumble to the floor," Gawain said with amusement. "It isn't often that I have such an effect on pretty women such as yourself." Setting her carefully back down, he gave her a brief smile. "Even if you do think that I'm scary."
He was gone before Anna could think of a suitable response, and so she watched his broad back disappear down the stairs to the courtyard and inwardly kicked herself for her cowardice for the rest of the day.
"What's wrong with you, woman?" Vanora took a deep breath and struggled to find the words for her frustration before exhaling with a huff of annoyance. "He was there, you were there, you fell into his arms twice…" She held a hand up to halt Anna's protests. "And still we're right back where we started."
"Not really." Uncomfortably aware as to just how naïve she was at courtship, Anna gave the red-head a sheepish look. " I told him that he was scary looking."
"Scary looking." Vanora rolled her eyes in exasperation. "I swear to Circe you are worse than Five pining over Lucan." She fixed Anna with a narrowed amber gaze. "And she's fifteen."
"Sorry." Wiping the pot she had been washing dry and placing it carefully on the sideboard, Acha shrugged helplessly. "But it's not like I've had much practice in these things - if Ma hadn't have died then I'd likely still be in my little house in the forest. Alone and happy without all these…."
"Complications?" Vanora gave her friend a wry smile. Anna had been the proverbial babe in the woods when she had been forced to come looking for work, and although the woman was not much younger than her, she mentally lumped the shy woman in with her children and treated her accordingly. "But complications aren't always a bad thing." Whacking one of her younger children on the bum when he reached for a freshly baked biscuit without breaking stride, Vanora walked over to Anna and studied her thoughtfully.
"Well girl, if it's Gawain that you want then we'll just have to persuade him to notice you then, won't we?"
"We've, already tried," Anna said sadly. "I don't think he's interested."
"Nonsense," Vanora replied briskly. " He's already rescued you from a spider and a mouse - he must be fond of you. All we need to do is raise the stakes a little."
Anna looked at her friend warily. "Van… if you've got a Woad tied up somewhere then I want no part of this. Dumping a mortal enemy on a knight as an excuse for a conversation is going too far, even for you."
Vanora gave a "hurrumph" of annoyance. "Who said anything about Woads? I was thinking more along the lines of a rat."
"A rat?" Anna looked at her friend with complete exasperation. "I am not letting a rat loose in the knights' quarters. Even if I could get it up there alive without it gnawing through my dress, Freya would have a heart attack if she thought there was an infestation. Remember the time that bat got into Galahad's room?"
Vanora gave a wistful smile as she remembered Freya, the elderly yet formidable chatelaine of the soldier's barracks racing up and down the hall, trying in vain to chase away the tiny bat that had flown into the youngest knight's room.
"I didn't mean a live one, I was thinking more of a dead one," the tavern keeper said as though it were the most natural thing in the world. "And this time when you fall intoGawain's arms try and think of something nice to say. Complement him on his eyes or his hair.."
Anna raised an eyebrow.
"Alright, not his hair," Vanora amended. "I don't know.. Tell him you've heard that he has a huge…."
"Sword?" Anna interrupted hastily, well aware of where the conversation was heading and wanting no part of it. "I don't know Van, it all seems a bit deceitful…"
"Nonsense." Vanora gave the table she was wiping such a vigorous polish that the shine in her eyes was reflected upon it, and Anna felt her heart sink. "Just leave everything up to me."
This is stupid, the words went around in a loop in Anna's mind, but it was too late to back out now. Even if Gawain hadn't been walking towards her and she called the whole thing off it would have been difficult enough to explain why Eight, Vanora's youngest daughter was crouched behind a door holding a bit of string attached to a dead rat.
Slightly hysterically, she watched the big man approach, her heart doing a familiar somersault when he smiled at her, and tried to remember what she was supposed to do.
"Rat", Eight hissed from behind the door.
Right. Gathering herself, Anna leaped up in feigned horror, yanking up the blanket she was holding and sending the dead rat concealed in its folds tumbling onto the floor.
"Rat!" she yelped, hoping that her voice didn't sound as squeakily ridiculous as it did to her own ears. Eight, finding the whole thing a bit ridiculous, but nonetheless excited to be included in one of her mother's plans, quickly reeled in the dead rat from her hiding place, only to find herself left with a frayed bit of string rather than the rodent that the kitchen cat had caught last night.
"Anna…" Poking her head around the door, Eight watched as Gawain picked up the axe that he had thrown into the body of the already dead rat and beat a swift retreat. From the look on Gawain's face he was none to happy ; sliding out the window she dropped onto the meadow, she muttered a quick good luck prayer for Anna before racing off to find her friends.
Anna stood frozen as Gawain carefully wiped the knife he had thrown before returning it to the scabbard he wore around his waist. Reaching down, he picked up the rat that was so obviously dead that it dangled stiffly from the piece of string wrapped around its middle.
After studying it intently for a moment, Gawain raised an eyebrow and gave Anna the benefit of his piercing blue eyes.
"It appears that our rats are getting lazy - apparently they now need children to tow them around," he said without any trace of humour.
Anna felt what seemed to be most of the blood in her body rush to her cheeks, leaving her heart to batter pointlessly against her ribcage. Running away seemed to be quite a good idea, but it was a dim little thought at the back of her mind. Meeting Gawain's steady gaze, she realised just why some rabbits froze when a fox approached them.
"Is this yours?" He asked politely, holding the dead rodent out towards her. The rat spun on its bit of string, glassy eyes looking at her accusingly.
"Yes." Anna took it and stood feeling utterly ridiculous. A knight and a maid holding a dead rat on a bit of string, she thought slightly hysterically. Now there's a challenge for the minstrels.
"You tied a rat onto a bit of string." Gawain's low voice was gentle, but it was a statement rather than a question.
"Yes." There seemed to be no point in lying, so she dropped her eyes and pretended to study the floor.
"And that clatter from the next room was no doubt one of Vanora's offspring helping you with this strange endeavour?"
"Yes."
"The mouse last week - was that tied to anyone I know?" There was laughter in Gawain's voice now, and Anna suddenly found herself overwhelmed by the utter ridiculousness of the situation. Looking up into his kind eyes, she found herself unable to stifle the giggles that welled up within her. Shaking her head and giving a most unladylike snort of laughter, she gave Gawain an utterly unselfconscious grin. Looking up at him frankly, her hair all over the place, her cheeks as red as the holly berries outside, she threw caution to the wind .
"That was my attempt at flirting," she said boldly. "Dead rats. But in my defence I was acting under Vanora's advice, and since she's got a dozen babes then she must be doing something right."
"Flirting?" Gawain shook his head in amusement, glancing at the dead rat discarded on the floor before turning his attention to the woman before him. "Bors must have strange tastes…." Picking up the very much deceased rodent, he tossed it over the battlements before turning back to her. "Perhaps we should make things simpler and introduce ourselves."
Anna was torn between laughter and embarrassment. After a moments pause she gave a curtsey. "Anna of Alvestone, Sir."
Gawain gave a bow that would have had him mocked six ways from Sunday had Bors or Lancelot caught him at it. "Gawain of Samartia, my lady. Would you do me the honour of accompanying me to the tavern?"
"As you wish Sir." Taking his arm, they walked companionably down to the tavern to the surprise of none of the knights and the exasperation of Bors who had bet that the two would not become a couple until the following night.
"See love", Vanora said smugly to Five who was despondently watching Lucan chatting to the pretty daughter of the local blacksmith. "You should listen to your old mum."
"Rats?" Five watched as Gawain gave a chaste kiss to the pretty brunette maid who had been sat beside him all night. "I don't know…"
"Worked for Anna didn't it?" Vanora shoved aside a pile of dirty pots and rummaged in the tangle of odds and ends that had been shoved at the end of the big piece of wood that served as a makeshift shelf. "Give him a couple of days and Lucan will be all yours. Now where did I put that ball of string…."
Another silly little thing - make of it what you will.