Disclaimer: I do not own Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles. Seriously.
A/N: Written for Challenge #237 ~ Damage at femslash100.
A/N2: As always, if you had enjoyed or if you had not enjoyed this drabble, do let me know by reviewing (constructively, please). Cheers!
A/N3: Heya, I hope you haven't forgotten me. I haven't written for ages. RL has been such a bleeding hassle. Anyway, I still have exams (actually my first one is tomorrow), but I had a sudden moment of inspiration and thought I might as well write and post this before the muse takes another extended break. Also, I have to make a confession – I've been shying away from writing T:SCC because of this, that and the other. I'm trying my best to overcome this crisis of confidence, but this is just to let those of you who would like to know that T:SCC fics from me will be coming very tentatively.
Sarah was not sure when it was exactly that she began to lose herself.
Maybe it was when she realised that she was, that she had been and that she would be doing fundamentally the same routine day after day.
Perhaps it was when she woke up yet again, drenched in cold sweat with the afterimage of the end of the world still before her eyes and she could only feel secure the moment her fingers had wrapped around the cold grip of her gun.
Or it could be when she began finding it difficult to fall asleep and she took to wandering around the house. Her heartbeats would be fast at one point, slow at another and all the while she felt both angry and solemn, like needing to cry or maybe hurt someone. It might have been then – when the sight of a stoic Cameron just standing as she was wont to do calmed and steadied her – that Sarah realised she no longer recognised herself.
"Sarah?"
Sarah looked up at Cameron with a jerk, snapping out of her increasingly disturbing musing. "What?"
"You were just standing there with an odd look. I thought you were ill," Cameron explained.
Sarah resisted the urge to growl in response. She was an adult! Or so she reminded herself. "I'm fine. I was just thinking," she hissed.
"That is good to hear. Your continued good health is vital to the success of the mission," Cameron observed as she returned her attention to the empty street outside.
Sarah felt her heart inexplicably and painfully squeeze at Cameron's neutral remark. "The mission," she mumbled. "Of course."
"Did you say something, Sarah?"
"I didn't say anything." With that, Sarah turned and headed back to her room, telling herself repeatedly that Cameron was just a terminator.