Stiglitz took a drink from the bottle of vodka and passed it back to Donowitz. At least while he was taking a drink he had to stop talking about baseball, so Stiglitz could hear the game on the radio.
Donny almost spat vodka as the announcer said something.
"Fuck yeah!" He slapped Stiglitz on the back hard. "Home run! Awesome!"
He glared and took the vodka back.
"Hey! I wasn't done!"
"It is my apartment, so it is my vodka." He took another sip and was about to actually give it back to Donowitz when the phone rang.
"What the fuck, Stiglitz? Who fucking calls you? Especially at ten o'clock at night?"
He frowned at the phone and got up to answer it, ignoring Donny.
"Hallo?"
He didn't recognize the voice at first.
"...Stiglitz?"
"Who is this?
There was a drunken laugh.
"It's Dieter Hellstrom!"
He looked at the telephone, then over at Donny, scowling.
"Hellstrom? Why are you calling me, you Nazi fuck?"
"Ahah. I don't–" Another giggle. "I am so fucking drunk."
Stiglitz looked over at Donny, who was frowning at him as if it were Stiglitz's fault Hellstrom called.
"So fucking drunk. My god. We were playing a drinking game." A lighter snapped open over the phone and Stiglitz could hear him lighting a cigarette. "What are you doing?"
Stiglitz sighed.
"I was listening to a baseball game, with the Bear Jew."
"He's there?" Hellstrom giggled. "Let me talk to him!"
He waved Donny over, only too glad to hand him the phone.
"Who is it?"
"The Nazi, from the tavern in the basement."
"Well, what the fuck, why would I talk to him?"
"He wants to talk to you, Bear Jew!"
Donny huffed and took the phone.
"Hello!"
He was actually happy that Hellstrom called. He was very happy that he called. He still wasn't as drunk as he should have been from Stiglitz's cheap vodka, and in a moment of sobriety, he knew exactly what he was going to do once he heard Hellstrom's voice from the other side of the line. He was going to fucking tell him everything, all he ever wanted to yell at the face of a Gestapo officer, how they should have fucking executed him for everything that his people had done to the Jews of Europe, how they should have done it in a very painful way, breaking every bone in his body during the process – how he's going to fucking get on a plane to fucking Germany and fucking stab Hellstrom in the face himself. How he was going to bash his brains in with his giant fucking bat. He was gonna gouge his eyes out with his bare hands. He was going to fucking cut his sorry Nazi penis right off so he could never ever get a hard-on from killing Jews ever again. He was going to –
There was a giggle on the other side of the phone, and then a clunk.
Stiglitz looked at him, vodka in hand.
"Well?"
"I think he passed out."
He took the phone back.
"Hellstrom?"
No answer.
"Whatever."
He hung up the phone.
"Why the fuck would he call you, anyway?"
"I don't know. He does it like, once a month."
"What the fuck. From Germany?"
"No. I think he lives in Florida."
Donny just shook his head.
"You have some fucked-up friends, Stiglitz."