Amberele's body is saturated with anticipation and her heart sounds in her chest, a countdown to the end. She knew saving the Ellcrys would be difficult. She knew that sacrifices would have to be made, but she didn't realize just how many. Wil had given up any chance of a peaceful life. Amberle gave up her entire life. And Eretria…
Eretria had parted with her own blood, her own heart, her soul. Amberle felt so tethered to Eretria now, that to separate them would feel like the loss of a limb. Amberle this is what you're destined for. This is why you're here. Allanon's voice echoes in Amberle's head. And she understands. She really does. But, each time she thinks of her death, she feels as though her heart is scrabbling to escape from her chest.
Her return from the Blood Fire had been shock to Amberle's body. She felt weak, she felt scared, she felt sure. She remembers the feeling of Eretria's limp form in her arms, the coldness of her skin, the absence of breath. She thought Eretria's sacrifice had killed her.
But it hadn't.
Eretria is alive and well and Amberle now knows that she would do anything to keep it that way. She would gladly give her own life for Eretria's. No matter how many lifetimes passed, Amberle would always choose Eretria. Always always always, her blood sings. Fear grips her bones, but the thought of Eretria's black eyes keep her sane and sure.
Which is why the memory of Allanon's words doesn't hurt anymore.
Amberle, in order to save the tree, you must give yourself to it. You are the key. Giving your life to the tree means giving your life to save everyone around you.
Eretria didn't take it well. Wil was furious. But, when Amberle looked into Allanon's eyes, she understood. She knows why it has to be done. She knows why the tree needs to take her body and soul to flourish and save everyone she loves.
It's dark outside and well past midnight. The halls are quiet as Amberle makes her way to the Ellcrys. When she reaches the doors, she finds them unattended and inside the dark, dying tree twisting its way towards the sky. No leaves grace it's branches, the wood crumbling and decaying before her eyes. She walks forward and places her hand against one of the great roots, tears welling in her tired eyes. It's cold beneath her touch, but she can feel the buzzing sound it makes beneath her palm at their contact.
She smiles through her tears, remembering the way she used to run around the tree, climbing its branches at night, when no one would see her. When her parents died, she stayed in the great room almost every night for a week until her Grandfather found her, sleeping in the cradling arms of the tree.
Now I'll be those cradling arms.
"Amberle?"
Amberle starts at the soft voice behind her, but her smile widens affectionately when she sees Eretria. Her dark hair falls about her shoulders in waves, her sleepwear loose and light around her body. To Amberle she looks like a fallen angel. Amberle steps forward and takes Eretria's hand in hers, leading her across fallen branches and misplaced stones until they stand on a clump of gnarled roots. From there they can see the surrounding forests and towns. Lanterns dot the scenery here and there and a gentle breeze kisses their cheeks and sweeps their hair across their faces.
"It's beautiful isn't it?" Amberele whispers. "This is your home now Eretria, if that's what you want."
Eretria turns and cups Amberle's face in her hands, forcing her to look into her eyes. "Not without you. Wherever you are is home."
Amberle kisses the palms of Eretria's hands, tears streaming down her face. Her heart feels like it's exploding, spilling the love and pain and sadness across her whole body. She can almost feel it oozing from her pores, coating everything around her.
Eretria's hands are warm against Amberle's cold skin. The day that Eretria gave her blood and Amberle gave her body, something changed between the two of them. It feels like they've been wrapped tightly together, like they've grown into one entity. It is the most beautiful feeling and it is ending all too soon. Eretria's cheeks are flushed and her lips are full and pink and she is so beautiful that a physical ache seems to blossom from Amberle's very being.
"You'll be okay, Eretria. I promise. I promise, you'll be okay."Amberle says, her voice cracking.
"No, I won't, Amberle. You don't understand." Eretria's voice is thick with emotion. It sounds raw and unforgiving against Amberle's pointed ears. "I...I love you." She doesn't look away from Amberle as she says it.
"I love you too." Amberle says, a sad smile dancing across her lips.
Eretria kisses Amberle gently, their tears mixing. There are no words to describe this moment, no way to explain what's happened between them or how quickly. They break and wrap their arms tightly around each other, filling the spaces between them. The scent of Amberle's hair fills Eretria's nose, the feel of her skin becomes etched into Eretria's fingertips. She wants to remember this, always. No matter what happens, no matter how many times she falls in love or where she goes, or how she dies, she will never forget Amberle.
"I have to do this, Eretria." Amberle says, biting her lip. "There's no other way. If I don't do this, the whole world will burn."
"Then let it burn." Eretria says fiercely, tears spilling over onto her cheeks.
Amberle looks at her, taking in every detail of her face. She pulls Eretria to her, kissing both her cheeks before pressing her lips to hers. They nuzzle into one another, hearts beating as one, knowing that this will be the last time they sit together. Their adventure is ending and there's nothing either one of them can do about it.
So they sit. And they wait. And they hold onto one another tightly until destiny yanks them apart.
When Amberle disappears into the roots and the tree lives, Eretria finds that she cannot come to terms with it. There is no body to bury because Amberle isn't dead, but there is no way to speak to her; she doesn't exist in the same capacity that she always has. When it first happened and Amberle stepped into the tree, Eretria had collapsed with Wil's long arms around her, his tears wetting her hair. Allanon had watched Amberle's form walk into the trees arms, watched the breath in her lungs become the tree's breath, her body become the tree's trunk.
Since that moment, Eretria has avoided everyone. It feels like she's walking through life as a ghost, barely there, just a slight imprint on this earth. Eventually she begins leaving her room to see the Ellcrys. Each time feels a little easier, but not much and she begins to wonder if the pain in her chest will ever cease completely.
"Eretria." A deep voice says behind her. Allanon.
"I don't want to talk to you." Eretria says, her voice sharp and steely.
"You cannot keep coming here and forgetting the world you're leaving outside these doors."
"I can do whatever the hell I want. I'm free of my duties. I did what you asked. I helped Amberle and Wil." The tree is so beautiful. The bark has turned a glowing, silvery color and the leaves are a rich, deep red.
"Eretria-" Allanon starts.
"Enough. I don't want to hear this anymore. Don't you see what you've done?" Eretria finally turns to face him. Her hair is worked into two long braids that hang over her shoulders, her black eyes blurred with tears. "You sent her to die. You killed her. You knew what she would have to do and you still sent her on a journey that would lead to her death." Eretria stops and turns back to stare at the great tree reaching towards the stars.
"Amberle isn't dead. She's only changed. She gave up her life in this world so that the Ellcrys could heal and innocent people could live. She saved us. All of us. It was an honor for her." Allanon says, voice deep and wise.
"An honor for her? When did you even give her a damn choice?" Eretria said, whipping around and stepping towards him. "You had her on a leash, telling her what she had to do and when she had to do it. You are a coward, Allanon. You hid behind Amberle while she fought on the frontlines like your footsoldier. Don't talk to me about honor."
"I'm sorry. I don't regret what's been done, but I am sorry for the pain it's caused you."
Eretria hears footsteps recede, but doesn't turn around. She finds herself feeling guilty and ashamed for the way she spoke to Allanon, but she also feels raw and sensitive like a fresh burn. When the doors are shut and Eretria is alone she finally moves closer to the tree. She hasn't touched it since that day, hasn't been closer than a few feet away. But tonight, she finds herself unable to continue distancing herself. Something is pulling at the very core of her being and she can't ignore it.
She slowly walks forward, her hand outstretched. It hovers above the bark and she can feel a humming beneath her fingertips. After a moment's hesitation, she places her palm on the roots of the Ellcrys. A desperate and powerful kind of pain shoots through her body, a lightning flash that dulls and weakens as lines wind their way up her arms. Eretria looks down, panic and fear far from her mind. Lines swirl around her wrist and make their way up her arm, soft like fingertips brushing against her skin. The movement stops, but her body remains warm from the feeling. She finally opens her eyes to see that a tattoo has branded itself onto her skin.
Large crimson leaves lay against her skin and hollow lines of a tree dance up to her shoulder and onto her collar bone. Eretria looks up at the Ellcrys, her vision blurred with tears. "Amberle," she whispers into the night and the tree hums to her in return: Eretria Eretria Eretria. It's as though Amberle is on the other side of a door that Eretria doesn't have the key to, but she can feel her presence all the same. Taking a deep breath, Eretria climbs onto the roots of the tree and winds her way up branches and through leaves until she finds a nook to settle into. The arms of the Ellcrys cradle her and she feels safe, like Amberle's soft arms are wrapped around her. She nuzzles down into the boughs, heavy with leaves. A breeze sweeps through the open room. The leaves rustle and seem to sing…
Eretria, Eretria, Eretria…
She sits up, her hair sweeping around her in a tangle. The leaves glow in the darkness and the bark around her begins to shine from the inside, creating a soft blue lighting. Eretria has never seen anything so beautiful. The tattoo that climbed her arm and caressed her breast begin to glow and pulse in tandem. She can feel Amberle. She can feel her within her blood and her bones, coursing through her body. Amberle was here, she was alive. She can't put into words, the way she feels. It's as though she's seen into Amberle's heart and Amberle has looked into hers. Tears rush to her eyes again, but this time, she is smiling through them.
For a full year the tree is silent. It never spoke to anyone, other than Amberle that night after she sacrificed her life to save her loved ones and her kingdom. Eretria visits regularly, and sometimes Wil sits with her. Other times Wil sits on his own. Eventually, old pains grow weak for everyone else, but not for Eretria. She continues to move, she tirelessly lives, but she always feels an empty hollow in her chest that nothing and no one can ever fill.
On what would have been Amberle's 18th birthday, a few of them meet and stand in front of the Ellcrys, honoring Amberle's life and her sacrifice. Slowly everyone trickles from the room, returning to their lives, chasing night's dreams and life's hopes. Wil embraces Eretria tightly, planting a kiss on her cheek before leaving with the rest of them. When it's just Allanon and Eretria standing side by side, she's able to breathe a little easier.
"I'm proud of you, Eretria. For your strength and your growth over the past year." Allanon says gently, looking down at the dark haired rover. But, she isn't a rover anymore. She never has been, really.
"Thanks. You're not as much of a dick as I thought you were." Eretria smiles, looking up at him. They've grown to truly respect and value one another and it's served both of them well to have someone to talk to.
As night falls, even Allanon leaves and Eretria finds herself alone with the thing she loves most in this world. Dusk settles and darkness falls and the tree stands before her, still and sturdy.
"Happy Birthday, Amberle." Eretria breathes into the night. "I love you."
She turns and walks towards the doors and the darkness. She's nearly there when she feels a rush of warmth inside her and hears a creak and groan behind her. Warm light explodes around Eretria's form, leaving her not much more than a silhouette.
But, it's the voice that stops her in her tracks. "Eretria!"
Eretria knows that voice. She knows how her name sounds coming from those lips.
Eretria closes her eyes and turns towards the light, a smile taunting her mouth, her dimples showing her joy.
She lives.