Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS.

A/N: OK, so everyone has written one of these; that doesn't stop me from wanting to hop on the bandwagon, though. ;-) Hopefully I'll manage to make my version of Tony's bucket list slightly different.

There will be some Tony/Ziva in this fic, but it isn't really the point. The point of this fic is Tony, growing and coming to terms with himself, his life, and the people in it. Updates will probably be far apart… my apologies in advance.

Chapter One: A Crucial Conversation

✔#26: Tell her.

"Hey, I know we haven't talked in a long time. I was really angry when you first left me, you know? I loved you. Still do, even if it just feels like a distant memory some days. Just be glad no one else is nearby, or you'd never get me to admit any of this.

So how are things? You still keeping everyone in line there? Now why doesn't that surprise me? You were always good at that.

Me? Yeah, I guess my life is going well. I'm still working at NCIS with Gibbs and Tim. I don't think I ever told you about our newest team member, did I? Yeah, her name is Ziva David. Smart, sassy, dangerous; she used to be Mossad.

Speaking of dangerous women, I ran into Wendy a couple of months ago. Crazy, right? She finally told me why she didn't marry me… apparently I was too perfect for her or something. I sort of get that, but mostly I'm still irritated with her. Whatever. Bygones are bygones and all that, right?

…She's got a kid, you know.

Why yes, I am still a bit afraid of kids. Thanks for asking.

They're just… terrifying little minions of darkness, that's why!

Huh. You always could see through me. But no, I don't want to discuss it.

Uh… I don't want to talk about her either. How did you know, anyway? I mean, yeah, you were always scary perceptive, but… c'mon. This is the first time I've ever even mentioned her!

Oh. OK, that does make sense. She said something like that to me once, about how she can tell if something's serious if I'm not talking about it.

Yeah, I'll tell her. Someday. Maybe.

But that wasn't the point of this conversation! The thing is… I guess what I wanted to say is… I forgive you. For leaving me and all that. I know it wasn't your choice, but I blamed you for it anyway because it was easier.

So… I forgive you. And I'm sorry.

I miss you, Mom. And, uh, thanks for listening."

A/N, continued: Happy mother's day to those of you who live in the United States! (And to the rest of you, of course, but different countries choose different days to celebrate it.)