No one knows
Dean watches as Castiel steps forward and puts his hand on his head, and in a second he is standing outside the old, abandoned church where he had left his little brother to complete the last trial by himself only a few hours go. For a moment he just stands there, he will never get used to the feeling of being flashed places by an angles, but he snaps out of it, remembering the reason he was back here. Sam. He has to save Sam.
Naomi's words repeating in his head, 'if Sam completes these trials, he will die'.
Running as fast as his legs will take him, Dean rushes into the old church and kicks open a door revealing his little brother standing over Crowley, his hand already bleeding in preparation of completing the last step of the trial.
A sigh of relief left him. He had made it, he still had a chance to stop this and save his little brother, the one he had sworn to always protect.
"Sammy, stop!"
Sam's head shoots up, his saddened, tired eyes meeting Deans.
"Easy there, okay, just take it easy, we got a slight change of plan"
Sam's facial expression changes from exhaustion to total confusion as he tries to process his big brothers words.
"What? What's going on? Where's Cas?"
Sam wasn't sure what to think at that moment, why would his brother try and stop him from completing the trials, they have worked too hard and have suffered too much to just let this go. He couldn't in his right mind think of a reason why Dean would be practically begging him to stop.
"Metatron lied. You finish this trial, your dead Sam"
As the words coming from his big brothers mouth hit Sam, his mind was conflicted. On one hand, he wanted to live, he loved his brother, more than anything in the world, and he knows that dean would never get over this if he died. On the other hand, Sam feels as if this is his duty, he has done so much wrong in this world, as his brother kindly pointed out on many occasions. Yes, he has suffered in hell for his sins, but removing all demons from earth will finally give him the peace of mind he has been craving, no matter at what cost. He had to do this, if it's between saving one life, his own, or banishing all demons from this earth, therefor, saving many lines, there was comparison.
Sam was the one that broke the silence that has been consuming the two brothers for longer than either of them have realised.
"So?"
Deans couldn't believe what he was hearing, was his brother really willing to sacrifice himself? The answer to that was obvious, yes. Sam had done it before, when he threw himself into Lucifers cage, taking both Michael and Lucifer down with him, effectively stopping the apocalypse. Sam saved the world that day, even though it cost him a full year in the cage. A year, that even though Sam had never spoken about it, was sure to have been filed with more pain and suffering that anyone could ever imagine, even Dean.
Dean was brought out of his thoughts when Sam spoke again.
"Look at him, look at him. Look how close we are. Other people will die if I don't finish this!"
Dean knew it was true, but he couldn't, he just couldn't let Sam sacrifice himself for the goodness of others, again. The year that Sam was trapped in the cage had nearly killed Dean, and he was unwilling to repeat it. He will save Sam, ha had to.
"Think about it. Think about what we know huh? Pulling souls from hell, curing demons, hell, ganking a hellhound! We have enough knowledge to turn the tide here. But Sammy, I can't do it without you"
Sam recognised the emotion in Dean's voice, fear. It had been the last voice he heard that night when he died in cold oak in his brother's arms. He had tried to keep his eyes open, tried to hold on to Dean's terrified voice whispering his name and words of encouragement. No. This time he is dying for something, his death will mean something, his death will mean the gates to hell are shut for good and the world is demand free at last. He knew Dean will be ok without him, after all, all he ever did was mess up things for his big brother, well. That ends now.
"You can barely do it with me! I mean, you think I screw up everything I try, you think I need a chaperone remember?" Sam stated remembering the words that were spoken early that day to Castile, behind his back.
"Come on man. That's not what I meant."
Dean couldn't take back the words he said, but he sure in hell isn't going to stop trying to convince his brother that those words had no meaning, that they were spoken in the heat of the moment to his angle friend. He was going to save Sam, there was no other choice.
Sam looked at his older brother, suddenly, a wave of anger washed over him, He knows Dean had meant every word earlier that day. Sure, Sam had messed things up, very badly, in the past, but he is a different person now, changed, better. He is no longer the naive, trusting guy he was when he decided to side with Ruby, unknowingly starting to apocalypse. No, he was stronger now, and he knows what he has to do. He will not let anything stop him from saving the world that he has ruined, he will not hurt anyone ever again. He won't hurt Dean ever again.
"No that's exactly what you meant. You want to know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was"
Sam stopped speaking for a moment, trying so hard to push back the tears that where threating to overcome him. Losing the fight, his vision went blurry as a single tear fell from his eye. Whipping it away angrily he continued.
"It was how many times I let you down. I can't do that again"
With that statement Dean's heart broke, after everything he and his brother have been through together, Sam still believed that he is a letdown, that he is a failure. Yes, his little brother has made some horrible choices in the past few years, but he has also done so much good, has saved so many lives, and had paid a great price. Sam was a good man, and Dean will be damned if he didn't get his little brother to see that before it was too late.
"Sam"
Dean looked up at his brother, seeing a sight he will never forget. Sam's eyes, the once bright eyes filled with happiness and joy, where now replaced with the saddest pair of eyes he had ever seen. Tears were falling down his little brothers face, and Dean knew he was losing his him. No. He won't let that happen. Opening his mouth to say something else, he was stopped as Sam's mouth opened, about to speak again.
Images where flashing in Sam's mind, like a montage of the past few years of his life, playing through in his head. All the things he and his big brother have been through together, all they had lost… all he had lost. Remembering all of the times he felt so rejected by his brother.
One memory that will haunt him forever, was Dean under the influence of the coin. That day he threw it all back in Sam's face, all the mistakes his made, the things he did, how horrible of a brother he has been to Dean. None of it was new information, but hearing it from his big brother, knowing this is how he truly felt inside, that Dean was willing to kill him for all he has done, that is something Sam Winchester will never be able to forget. Every word said that day was like a dagger, pushing deeper, twisting into Sam's heart, until this day it doesn't fell that that dagger has been removed. He had been waiting for the tears to stop so he could continue talking, realizing they weren't stopping, he decided to speak anyway.
"What happens when you've decided I can't be trusted again? I mean, who are going to turn to next time instead of me? Another angle? Another…"
Sam didn't want to finish that sentence, seeing Dean with Benny, hearing his say that Dean, his brother, thinks that Benny has been more of brother to him that past year than Sam had ever been, it broke his heart. Shaking the memory out of his head, he finished.
"Another vampire"
Dean couldn't bear to hear this any longer. The feelings of guilt and regret about how he has been treating his brother since he has come back from purgatory overwhelmed him. He couldn't listen to Sam talking this way anymore, he had to interrupt, he had to show his brother that he is wrong. He had prove that none of what he was saying is true. He had to show Sam that he means the world to him and that he can't live without him. And so dean spoke again, voice harder and angrier than he had intended.
"Hold on, hold on! You seriously think that? Because none of it, none of it, is true!"
Trying to compose himself, Dean took a deep breath before continuing to speak.
"Listen man, I know we've had our disagreements okay? Hell, I know I've said some junk that set you back on your heels…."
'Well that's an understatement if I've ever heard one' Sam thought, though he said nothing.
"But Sammy… come on. I killed Benny to save you! I'm willing to let this basters, and all the sons of bitches that killed mum walk because of you. Don't you dare think that there is anything past or present that I would put in front of you. It has never been like that, ever!"
With that Dean sighed, his voiced calmed as he looked to at his distraught little brother.
"I need you to see that. I'm begging you"
Dean Winchester never cried, he was a strong man and would never let anyone see him break, but at this moment, begging, pleading for his brother to understand and to listen to him. Trying so desperately to save Sam's like from himself, triggered the steady stream of tears that started flowing down his face.
Dean looked at Sam, he had always been able to tell what he was thinking, but this time was different. He looked at his little brother, the little boy he carried out of that fire, the stubborn, rebellious, strong willed kid he has raised all his life was no longer there, and when Sam looked up at him, there was nothing but desperation and pain, pain he had helped put there.
Sam looked into those beautiful emerald green eyes, eyes that had always brought him comfort in times of distress, he would miss those eyes, but he knows what he has to do. With an apologetic look Sam spoke.
"I'm sorry Dean"
"No" Dean replied. Not wanting to believe what was happening.
"I never meant to hurt you, or anyone else for that matter"
"No" dean stated again, this time, his voice angrier.
Chick flicks be damned, Sam had to say what's on his mind before he left for good.
"I'm so sorry dean, I really am, but I have to do this. Please don't blame yourself, and please don't try and bring me back, that brings far more trouble and pain then I'm worth. And for what it's worth, you are the best big brother anyone could ever ask for, and I'm beyond lucky." I small smile took place on Sam's face as he finished that sentence.
Dean felt his eyes burning with tears, he can't believe the words coming out of his little brother's mouth, words that sounded way too much like a goodbye for him to actually process them. He had to save Sam, he just had to, it was always his job, he couldn't fail now. So many emotions rose up as Dean yelled.
"No Sam! Don't give me this last words crap! You are not dyeing you hear me! Now stop doing this trial right now!"
Silence filled the room as Dean desperately waited for a reply from the man standing in front of him.
"Please" he begged.
He was begging for so many things, he just wanted his little brother back, was begging for a miracle.
Sam sent his brother an apologetic smile as he stepped further towards Crowley, chanting the spell, his hand filled with his own blood ready to finish this trial for good.
"Sammy stop" Dean yelled.
But Sam just kept going, he finished reciting the spell and brought his hand up to Crowley's mouth.
With one last look at his older brother, Sam tried his best to ignore the look on his face, as he knows, that under all the anger and fear there is love, love directed at him. With that thought in mid he was ready.
"I love you jerk"
Those will be the last words that came out of Sam Winchesters mouth. As he shoved the blood in this hand into Crowley's mouth, there was a bright light and the whole world seemed to have stopped for a moment.
Dean shut his eyes protecting himself from the blinding light.
As he opened his eyes, his gaze fell on the figure in the chair first, still tied, blood covering his mouth and Dean knew that Crowley was no longer a demon and the gates of hell where finally shut. That thought would have brought him great relief and happiness if it hadn't been for the other figure in the room. Dean dropped on his knees next to his lifeless looking brother, Sam looked so pale, there was no colour in his lips and his eyes where shut.
"Sammy?"
Dean asked, his voice quiet and pleading. He, once again, prayed for a miracle.
"Sam, come on man wake up man"
Somewhere inside, Dean knew his brother won't wake up. His little brother was dead, gone, forever, and he hadn't been able to stop it.
"Sammy please"
Dean was now shaking his brother, hoping to see those beautiful puppy dog eyes again….. But he knows he won't.
"Sam"
Dean whispered has he cradled his little brother in his arms, just like he used to when they were kids and Sam was hurt or scared. That position had always brought more comfort to Dean them Sam, it meant that his little brother with him, safe and protected, though this time, it meant the exact opposite. Dean placed his forehead in Sam's head and cried, tears mixing with his brothers long, brown hair. This is all way to familiar.
Dean just sat there, sobbing for a few minutes, until he remembered that last words his little brother had said to him. 'I love you jerk', he heard his brothers voice echo in his mind.
"I love you too bitch"
Inside an old church, there were two brothers whose bond was so strong that it could never be broken. The younger brother dead, the older still sitting holding him tight, mourning, grieving, because he never wanted to let go.
There are billions of people in the world, going about their everyday business, and non on them know, not one person know that a young man had just died, had just made the ultimate sacrifice, in order to save the them.