Based on the Bleach Doujinshi, Decadence of a heart by Kodomo-no-luna of deviantART
DECADENCE OF A HEART
He Lives In You
The illumination from the light of the moon radiated the skies with a pale glow of radiance over Seireitei of the Soul Society as the dark Hell Butterflies flew across the horizon freely, spreading their wings amidst with the dispersing clouds which faintly hovered around the darkening atmosphere.
'On this day, I remember it so clearly,
the heaven was fraught with black butterflies.
The dark messengers of Soul Society.'
Near the very heart of Seireitei, in the sixth division barracks of the main military organisation of Soul Society known as the Gotei 13, the door leading to the office of the vice-captain soon came into sights as a squad member sprinted towards it; his feet tapping on the wooden ground as he quickly reached it, closer and closer with every passing second.
"Kuchiki-Fukutaichou!" he shouted without stopping as he continued to sprint the last few metres towards the door labelled with the Gotei 13 division six insignia.
'Again there was war.
And although I always knew that this day would come, I had never imagined, it would be so soon.
It was too soon.'
The squad member finally reached his destination and he burst open the door; interrupting the vice-captain's concentration of his work as his brush came to a stop on the sheet of paper before him on his desk as he calmly waited to hear the squad member's report. He raised his eyes from his desk towards his fellow member at the door; the double kenseikan hanging behind his left ear moving back slightly.
"Kuchiki-Fukutaichou!" he addressed his superior once again, "A thousand pardons for my rude interruption! But I have an important matter to report!"
"What happened?" the vice-captain asked, excusing the member's infraction, "Have you received a message from the Taichou?"
"Not from Kuchiki-Taichou! But someone of the unit for this mission sent a report!"
"Do you have the report with you?"
"Yes, of course, Kuchiki-Fukutaichou!"
He moved further into the office, pulled out the sheets of the report, and placed them down on the desk in front of his vice-captain, Kuchiki Soujun.
"It's about the current situation in the west..."
Soujun closely skimmed through the entire report, breathing out an "I see..." as his mind read the data and began to understand more of the current situation at hand. His eyes reached the final character on the files in his hands as his eyes slightly widened in anxiety.
"Father..." he whispered to himself, a deep feeling of dread pulsating through his blood.
"Yes," the member continued, "It seems like the Taichou was injured during a fight, but it says that we don't need to worry."
"I don't mind what it says. I will establish a new unit for amplification as fast as possible."
Soujun dropped the report files as he stood up from his desk.
"But... Are you sure this is needed?"
"I just want to make sure Kuchiki-Taichou and the rest of the unit is alright... I'm worried..."
"But... Shouldn't we await orders from the Sou-Taichou?"
"Perhaps, but we can't wait for too long! Furthermore I have to hustle something before we go!"
Soujun walked past the squad member before he began to run out of his office towards his destination as the thought crossed his mind.
"Let the squad accumulate now!" he ordered behind his back at the member who still looked bewildered at Soujun's recent decision of taking action. However, he had no choice but to follow the commands given to him by his ranking officers as he was not in the position to do otherwise.
.: :.
"Oi, Soujun! Why in such a haste? !"
"Please, don't yell!"
Soujun turned around and faced the three captains behind him. The second division captain, Shihouin Yoruichi, the thirteenth division captain, Ukitake Juushirou, and the eighth division captain, Kyouraku Shunsui.
His current task and mission never leaving his mind, he quickly excused himself.
"Sorry," he stated with a thin smile lining his mouth; a single bead of sweat running down the side of his face. "But I really don't have time to talk right now..."
It was the truth.
"Don't tell me you forgot the time to go home again?" Yoruichi sneered with a large smirk across her face.
"Getting that old, my friend?" Kyouraku remarked as another of his jokes.
"Geez..." Ukitake sighed as a response.
"..." Speechless, Soujun sweat-dropped harder at his uncomfortable position in the captains' comments.
"So how is your son?" Ukitake asked with curiosity as he easily changed the subject of converse.
"Are you unwell?" Yoruichi asked, finally realising the pressurised face crossing Soujun's face features. "Geez, maybe you shouldn't work so much, should you?"
"No, not at all. I'm feeling fine!" Soujun replied, dismissing their worries over him. "I just have to lead my squad through a mission. This is now my highest priority."
He paused, inhaling a deep breath before continuing his explanation. "My father is injured. I'll leave to the west front with my squad soon."
"To the west..." Yoruichi's eyes snapped wider as she quickly realised Soujun's intentions.
"I know what you want to say now..." Soujun tried to reassure her, fully knowing she would comment against his decision. However, he knew what he had to do. "But you won't be able to change my mind, Yoruichi."
"Hey, Soujun!" She grasped hold of his arm, quickly stopping him from walking further ahead. "You know that the war at the west site of Seireitei is a dangerous place to go at the moment!" She began to wonder if Soujun had gone completely insane or if he had completely forgotten the fact about the west war and the level of danger it was at that current moment.
"I'm aware of that. But I have no choice. If I want to become the next head of my family, I can't just always sit and wait!" Soujun exclaimed as he breathed in another sigh of air to calm his mind. "But it's more important to take care of my father... Anyway, you know that it is my duty as Fukutaichou as well..."
He quickly turned his heel and began to run off back to his initial destination once again, pardoning himself towards the three captains as he left.
"So excuse me now! I have to go!"
Ukitake and Kyouraku watched his retreating back as they sighed at Soujun's deep devotion towards the Kuchiki Clan and the Gotei 13. Ukitake raised his hand and rubbed the back of his neck as he continued to watch him go further into the distance.
"The west conflict has been going on without a result for so long now..."
"Not a good idea of him to go there now!" Kyouraku answered his opinion towards the matter for the first time in a serious tone.
Yoruichi, instead, felt her blood beginning to boil at Soujun's reckless decisions and at his stubbornness to listen to their advices.
"Tse!" she scoffed loudly, "The Kuchiki's and their pride! It is so stupid! You idiots could get killed, damn!"
"Don't say that, Shihouin-Taichou..." Ukitake uttered, sweat-dropping at her behaviour.
"But it seems like there's something going on." Kyouraku stated, placing his hand at his chin as he thought more deeply about the entire situation as a whole. "I just don't understand where he could be going if he wants to go on a mission?"
"Where?" Yoruichi frowned, pouting. "He's running home... He would never go without telling him..."
.: :.
Finally, Soujun had arrived back to his home at the Kuchiki Estate as he walked past the mountainous gates that towered above the ground towards the heavens; the Kuchiki emblem imprinted upon the surface. Walking calmly, his feet making small taps on the wooden grounds of his home floor, he crossed through the length of the corridor and stopped outside a single door, leading to a single room.
A small wooden tag hung on the wall of the room with a name written onto it with thick black ink. The two characters stood for 'white' and 'night', also meaning awe or inspiration. Byakuya.
Making as little noise as he possibly could, Soujun slowly slid the door open just wide enough for him to slip inside. With the only source of light coming through the open door behind him, he sighed as he cast his gaze upon the small figure of the sleeping child on the bed. He was wearing pyjamas with a pattern of sakura petals lining the silk fabric and in his hands he held a small soft toy of a model of the Wakame Taishi – Seaweed Ambassador.
'I thought so...' he thought to himself as the corners of his mouth began rise. 'He's asleep. And I wasn't there to tell him "good-night" again. I'm sorry, my son...'
His hand made a slight sound as it gripped on the wooden panel of the door, looking back at his son, Byakuya, once more.
'Everytime it's harder for me to leave him alone...'
Soujun turned to leave but his entire body froze completely as a voice called out to him from behind.
"Otou-san...?"
Surprised, he looked back over his shoulder at Byakuya who had awoken from his sleep and had sat himself up, rubbing his eyes with his hand as they refocused to the light shining outside his room.
"You are home?" he asked with a hint of happiness breaking out into his voice. "Will you stay here with me now?"
Soujun did not reply but instead stayed silent. He knew what he had to do and it pained him to no end as he thought about the fact that he would have to leave his beloved son's side once again... but, at the same time, he also knew he had a duty to fulfil. To the Kuchiki Clan, to the Gotei 13, and to his own father as well.
Byakuya's voice brought him back out of his thoughts as he continued to speak. Byakuya squeezed his arm tighter around the Wakame Taishi in his hand as he began to dread the answer his father would give him but he remained hopeful. "Tomorrow we'll spend the day together... won't we, Otou-san?"
"I'm so sorry to disappoint you now, Byakuya... but I have to go on a mission, it is very important..."
Tears began to well up and flow down Byakuya's cheeks as he comprehended his father's words and realised he would be separated from his father for an even longer length of time. His mother had passed on and his father and grandfather rarely ever spent time with him at all due to their high occupations in the Gotei 13 as a captain of a division and a vice-captain. He had no siblings either and it made him feel lonely...
"You are going away again?" he exclaimed, sadness lining his very voice. "Why?"
"My son..." Soujun whispered in comfort, though his eyes reflected his deep grief and guilt of seeing his son tear-stricken, knowing fully he was the cause of it. Soujun walked further into the room and approached Byakuya, seating himself down on the bed in front of him.
"I have to help your grandfather. But we both will be back home very soon, you'll see! And then we will spend the whole day together." His lips curled into a small smile as he saw within Byakuya's eyes the unique spark he held in his grey depths.
"For real?" he asked, his voice now filled with joy and anticipation.
"Of course. The whole day and we can do what you want. But for now I have to leave. It's not like I want to... but I have to go."
Soujun breathed a sigh of relief as he also began to visualise the time the two of them would soon spend together...
"And for you it's time to go back to sleep, it's quite late now."
"The whole day? And you promise that?" Byakuya asked with eyes filled with hope.
"Yes, this I promise you, my son."
Byakuya held out his hand with his small finger outstretched as Soujun also held out his smallest finger. They connected together, hooking onto each other; signifying the promise they formed and would both keep.
"Alright!" Byakuya exclaimed in joy. "I want to go for a walk with you!"
"Okay, I'll keep that in mind!"
Soujun moved closer towards Byakuya and raised his hand, placing it gently on Byakuya's small face and he cleared away his previous tears that had still been lining his eyes. Winking, Soujun smiled at Byakuya again.
"And you have to promise me," he said, "that you will fall asleep very fast now. I can't stand to see you sad. So dream something nice, my son."
He rounded his arm around behind Byakuya's back and pulled him closer towards him as Byakuya placed his own arms around him simultaneously; holding each other in a tight embrace of their loving father-son relationship.
"I love you so much, Byakuya." Soujun spoke with a genuine smile spreading across his face. "You always have to remember that..."
"Yes, I know that! But one more thing before you go, Otou-san..."
"What is it?"
"This afternoon I drew a picture for you..."
Byakuya drew out a small page and handed it to his father who looked at it as his smile grew wider and wider.
"It shows you, Jii-sama and me! We're all together! It should bring you luck on your mission, Otou-san!"
Byakuya had drawn with crayons the sun in the sky with clouds and a bird flying overhead himself in the centre between his father and grandfather, holding hands. The ground was patterned with grass and flowers with a few trees in the back. Everyone looked happy, with smiles sketched across everyone's faces...
"I see..." Soujun murmured, "It's very beautiful." He continued to look at the picture, wondering if one day... they could all finally be happily together forever. "Thank you very much, Byakuya! I promise I will take it with me! I will show it to your grandfather later as well!"
Safely storing the picture in his pocket, Soujun stood up and moved off the bed. He raised the blankets over Byakuya's small body again, tucking him in for the night.
"Now go back to sleep, Byakuya!"
"Hai!"
"We'll see you soon!"
.: :.
Once again outside the gates of the Kuchiki Estate, Soujun kicked off from the ground and flash-stepped towards the rendezvous point that the sixth division shinigamis for the mission had gathered at.
'Perhaps everyone was right.
Maybe I shouldn't have left.
But duty... duty means too much when you carry our name, my son.'
Facing the crowd of his fellow shinigamis, he began to tell them the instructions and advice of their mission. "We need to hurry, but don't be reckless! Be careful. Important matters have to be reported immediately."
"Hai!"
Soujun gripped his zanpakutou sheath, positioned on the left side of his obi, tightly in his hand as he became cautious and alert... for the battlefield ahead.
'But it's not just this responsibility for my squad.
The most important thing to me is family.
I need to know if my father is alright.
I know that if it were me, you would follow me as well, wouldn't you?
Byakuya?'
Soujun flash-stepped further down, deeper into the woods with five other shinigamis from his squad following directly behind him. He continued to delve inside further, following his sense of directions and using his initiative; all his senses alert to its peak for enemies... or a trace to his father.
'We are almost there. I can feel it...' Soujun thought to himself as he continued to use shunpo even further.
He stopped, and held out his left hand signifying for the shinigamis behind him to stop as well.
"From now on," he informed them, "It will be dangerous. I want you to check on the injured men on the battlefield. Avoid fighting if you can. We're just here to help the casualty!"
'It was always my fight.
My fight to prove them all I'm worth it.
That I'm strong enough to handle it all on my own.
Perhaps I needed to prove that to myself as well.'
"Be careful," he continued, "If you head to the battle-area now."
"Hai, Kuchiki-Fukutaichou! We will take care of them! But what about you sir?"
Soujun began to move off alone in another direction as the others had been given orders to help the casualties instead of indulging themselves in direct combat.
"Shouldn't one of us escort you? !" a shinigami called after him but Soujun denied the request over his shoulder as he continued to run without stopping.
"No! I'll head towards the base! I will look if I can help out there and look for the Taichou! Now go! And always be aware of hollows!"
A few seconds had passed when his feet slowed down into a halt as his senses recognised an all too familiar reiatsu...
"Hm? ! I feel a hollow nearby and..."
He didn't have much time to think any further as a pitched scream pierced the night air and the deathly silence. The screams of shinigamis.
'And this is why I changed my way and followed the sound of those cries instead.
I knew there was someone who needed me.
Perhaps someone of my own squad.
I would have been a bad Fukutaichou if I had ignored it.'
Once again, turning his attention back towards the way he had come, he kicked off from the ground and flash-stepped towards the source of the screams, his right hand wound firmly around the hilt of his sheathed zanpakutou, drawing the sharp blade out slightly at thumb length to prepare himself for battle.
As he finally stepped closer, and the hollow was within his sights, only one of the five shinigamis he had left behind were left standing. Unfortunately, he too, had reached his limits. Blood had oozed itself from his forehead and spread down past his eyes. It also lined the side of his chin and over the palm of his hand as he bravely continued to remain his stance to kill the hollow before it killed him.
The hollow before them was twice their size in height and width. It had a large hole in its chest and the white mask it wore... was grinning in a broad smile as it admired its accomplishment of having defeating four shinigamis and was preparing itself to kill the fifth.
'I had a bad feeling all the time.
Like a misgiving that wouldn't let me go.'
Soujun finally completely drew out his zanpakutou and positioned himself to attack. The hollow hadn't seen him yet as it was too deeply concentrated on killing its current prey. It reached out, attempting to perform the final strike as the shinigamis screamed once more. Soujun quickly moved in front and between them, slashing through the air straight into the very centre of the hollow's mask. It growled in agony as the crack opened wider and wider until the hollow finally roared as loud as it could before it disappeared into thin air.
"Are you alright?" Soujun asked the shinigami behind him without looking back.
"Kuchiki-Fukutaichou? What... What are you doing here?" he held his injured right arm with his left as he stood up and approached Soujun.
"But..." he said, "Thank you very much for saving my life! I was on my way to the base when hollows attacked me!"
"I see." Soujun replied, "You are badly injured. We should get you to the base point now."
Soujun turned his head over his shoulder to look at the injured shinigami. "We should hurry, because..."
...He never finished his sentence. His eyes flickered widely as the sight before him engraved itself into his mind.
'What? !' he thought his eyes were deceiving him and his mind was playing tricks on him. But he knew it was no illusion. It was real...!
From behind, a sword had stabbed itself into the centre of the shinigami's chest, blood spreading across the blade from the tip of the edge to the piercing point in the shinigami's chest. The blade was then withdrawn and the attacker stepped back as the shinigami fell forward towards the ground as the red liquid splashed out from the shinigami's back.
Soujun jumped backwards and skidded his feet on the ground, the friction halting him to a stop. The shinigami had clearly been killed before his very eyes without him even noticing it! He needed to prepare himself for battle. He could feel that the attacker was no one ordinary.
'That was close...' he resounded in his head. 'It's no hollow, but... I can't define the reiatsu...'
His thoughts were cut back as the mysterious attacker quickly launched himself forward towards Soujun and swiftly swung his blade at him but he missed as Soujun jumped backwards once more and dragged his foot down again to regain his footing on the ground.
"Who are you? And what do you want from me? !" Soujun questioned with demand as he gripped his zanpakutou with his right hand even tighter.
"You don't need to know..."
Soujun shifted his left hand near to the hilt of his zanpakutou, the palm facing towards it. He raised the blade and it made contact with his opponent's, clashing together in a battle of power versus power. Soujun's eyes darted to his left as he shifted his feet quickly to move his body around the battleground.
There was the swish of a blade coursing across the unknown darkness as a double folded slip of paper fell open onto the ground...
The paper on which Byakuya had hand-drawn their family on...
"You can't run away from me. It's useless. Give up."
"I don't need to run away. And giving up is not an option for me."
Soujun slowly raised his hand and stretched out his fingers as he concentrated his reiatsu into his left hand, preparing himself to launch a kidou blast.
"Hadou 33: Soukatsui!" he exclaimed as blue fire materialised and formed from his reiryoku. The power widespread towards his target but just before the flame consumed him, he disappeared into thin air.
"That won't help you." The opponent had said before he had vanished.
Soujun soon realised his fateful mistake as he swiftly twisted his body to behind him and raised his zanpakutou in unison. His eyes were wide as he panicked his pending predicament until he finally realised that...
...he had been too late to act.
The single slash of the blade had been enough as blood... Soujun's blood... splattered the ground everywhere in front and beneath him as he felt each and every millimetre of the blade's progress sinking through his body.
The bright red crimson liquid fell towards the ground and splattered out in further directions as it impacted with the ground. At his feet, Byakuya's picture lay open... his father's life blood staining the corner of his picture on his father's side... covering his father in red.
'If I had only known what would happen on that day.
Perhaps I would have done the right thing.
Perhaps... I would have done things differently.'
Soujun felt his whole body falling backwards onto the ground beneath him, waiting for the impact. His eyes were wide as his body shivered in coldness and pain; countless beads of sweat lining his ever-shocked face... as he lay still in the pale moonlight.
Before the very sight of the bloody massacre, a footstep of a shinigami approached the scene of the death.
.: :.
'"It's honourable to die for one's duty.
He who wants peace readies for war."
That's what I've been told.
What I've been taught.
But the truth is it's nothing but painful,
when you think about what you will leave behind.'
Kuchiki Ginrei, captain of the sixth division of the Gotei 13, along with a small handful of shinigamis by him, stood on the landscape; overlooking everything before them in their sights. Within mere moments, Ginrei's eyes settled down on a new figure... his own flesh and blood. His son, Kuchiki Soujun.
He moved in a flash beside the still body and dropped down to his knees beside him as he lay... breathing very faintly.
"Soujun..."
His eyes flickered slightly open as he felt his upper body being lifted gently and his head rested into his father's arms. He knew, however, he would not live. Not any longer and Ginrei was aware of the fact as well. Still, as his father, he would be together with his son 'till his last breath.
"F-Father..." Soujun breathed out in a faint whisper. "Tell... tell Byakuya... I'm sorry for... b-breaking my promise..."
Ginrei closed his eyes as he prepared his mind for the next moment...
"And... please... take care of him..." Soujun finished, as a single tear streamed down his closed eyes as he completely lost strength to hold his own consciousness.
'Forgive me, Byakuya.'
.: :.
The air and tension of the following funeral was thick with grief and sadness for the loss of yet another loved one...
The altar had been completely set up with innumerable different types of flowers circling around the portrait with incense candles lit on both sides. A shining slab was placed in the very centre in front of the portrait with the name Kuchiki Soujun engraved upon it. Around the altar, a massive line of flowers had been arranged with hundreds and thousands.
The people stood around the funeral site with Ginrei in the front observing the photo of Soujun standing on the altar in front of him. Byakuya held onto his grandfather's hakama as he too began to observe the funeral of his beloved father with tears hanging in the brims of his eyes.
Many people had shown up in black kimonos to visit Soujun's funeral. Not one person was happy with his death as they all payed their respects to an admired vice-captain of the Gotei 13. Including Ginrei, who never showed any expressions of emotions could be seen on the verge of breaking down; barely holding onto his form with his eyes shut closed and his eyebrows knitted together.
'Forgive me for leaving you behind.
For making you cry again.
I'm so sorry your world is tumbling down because of me.
But you'll never be alone.
A part of me will always be with you.'
And the tears in Byakuya's eyes streamed down. It was his father. He had loved him very much. Now he was gone... and he was never going to come back.
.: :.
–Years Later–
Within the walls of the Kuchiki Manor, Byakuya sat behind the desk, observing closely at the intricate white head pieces before him. Kenseikan. Two. They were old and tattered slightly from the very sight of them. He continued to stare at them, thinking, when he heard his grandfather coming inside the door.
"Byakuya..."
"Jii-sama..." he answered, finally taking his eyes off the kenseikan and at his grandfather.
"What's wrong? Aren't you feeling well?"
"No, I'm fine. I was just thinking about something."
Ginrei's eyes moved to the desk and his sight landed on the objects before them.
"The Kenseikan? Where did you get them? They look used..."
"One of the elders gave them to me." Byakuya replied. "I was thinking about how to wear them like you told me."
Byakuya heaved a tired sigh as he recollected his thoughts back into his head and he averted his eyes back towards them.
"They... they belonged to Otou-san. That is why they are so worn. I really want to wear them, but... I am afraid I might break them."
Ginrei stared at his grandson in wonder. He had never seen him like the way he was now. Almost... like a different person. Almost... like his father.
"You still have much time left to think about that, Byakuya," Ginrei stated as he turned around to leave.
Byakuya finally turned his head, looking over his shoulder as he watched Ginrei leaving the room; the two pieces of kenseikan attached firmly to the side of his face... as his eyes reflected a new story in him.
'I guess you don't even know how much you resemble Soujun.
Despite what everyone else says. But they don't know anything at all.
They can't understand what it means to be you.
And I know they never will.
I'm sure... somehow Soujun watches over everything. And he will always live in you.'
Decadence of a Heart - He Lives In You
Credits
Bleach Creators
Kubo "Tite" Noriaki
Abe Noriyuki
Decadence of a Heart Original Creator
Kodomo-no-luna (deviantART) (FanFiction)
Decadence of a Heart Author
Zalero
Special Thank You
Kodomo-no-luna - Thank you for allowing me to republish your Bleach doujinshi into a fan fiction story! Thank you so much!
Decadence of a Heart - He Lives In You
Disclaimer
Kubo "Tite" Noriaki, the author of Bleach, has full rights and ownership of the following:
1. The characters: Kuchiki Soujun, Kuchiki Byakuya, Kuchiki Ginrei, Shihouin Yoruichi, Ukitake Juushirou, Kyouraku Shunsui, shinigamis, hollows, wakame taishi
2. The organisation: Gotei 13
3. The settings: Soul Society, Seireitei
Kodomo-no-luna, the original creator of the story, has full rights and ownership of Decadence of a Heart.