Paula could make book signings boring. He wasn't supposed to say that, and he would never let his fans know, but he would much rather be out in the field with his wife, taking down some psycho killer. He tried to engage each and every fan. This made the experience exciting for them, and time appeared to move faster to him. That was, until Paula got antsy, making him hurry through the line. He hated that part, the part when he didn't have time to look his fans in the eye because they were moving so fast. Wasn't he supposed to be connecting with the fans, wasn't what this was all about? As soon as it became about the numbers and not the fans, when he could no longer have meaningful discussions, he was done.
The next few hours became a flurry of pages and names in the back of that small bookstore. His eyes glazed over as he saw person after person in front of him. The rhythm changed when there wasn't a book for him to sign, but a person in front of him. Rick looked up, making eye contact with a very apprehensive teenage boy. He had dirty blonde hair and piercing blue eyes, and he was studying Castle's every move. "I can't sign unless you give me a book." Castle teased, raising his eyebrows and smirking at the boy.
"I don't have a book." The boy watched him, his eyebrows furrowed as he studied Castle's face.
"So, you want a selfie?" Castle asked, now confused. This was new. Usually fans wanted something, but this boy didn't seem like a fan. He was younger than the usual crowd, still dressed in a school uniform, his backpack slung over his shoulder.
"No." The teen's eyes softened then, and Castle was met with a sense of recognition, just for a moment, before he could place his finger on it. The kid's mouth fell open and his eyes searched the air around him for the words he wanted to say. "I think you're my father."
The room fell silent. Whether that was actually the case, or if it just seemed that way, Castle couldn't tell. His heart stopped, and now he searched the kid's face for more clues. How could his own flesh and blood exist out there without him knowing? Was this some sort of prank?
"Okay, that's sweet kid, but unless you have a book you need to move along." Paula put her hands on his shoulder and shoved him down the table, ushering the next group of people forward.
"Wait!" Castle shouted, stopping her. Because his heart had stopped and he could see it. That bit of recognition from before made perfect sense now. Alexis had looked at him like that so many times, the exact same expression. And now that he studied the teen, he could see it. Sure, his hair was blonde, his face a bit fuller, and his nose more round, but the boy looked like he had once. He pulled out a piece of paper, the ones he always kept nearby for people without books. "What's your name?"
He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Zachary. Zachary Bramble. My Mom's name is Charlotte."
Castle wrote the information down as Zach spoke, recognizing his Mom's name as he wrote it down. If he didn't believe it at first, he was believing it now. "Okay." He sighed, unsure of what to do. "I can't leave right now, but can you write down your number here? Wherever I can contact you?"
Zachary's eyebrows furrowed as he thought. "I don't have a phone, Mom says I don't need one. But I spend a lot of time nearby. Can I write down a meeting place?" Castle nodded as he handed over the paper. As Zach wrote, he spoke, his voice a whisper. "You work with the police sometimes, right?"
Castle bobbed his head up and down, studying the boy's movements. It was eerie, watching someone who looked like him, someone who might be part of him that he had never met before. "I work with the police a lot. My wife is a cop."
Zach grinned, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a Ziploc baggie with a chunk of hair in it. "You can test it, if you want." His face fell again. "There's not a lot of time. My mom…" He trailed off before shaking his head, putting up a mask and hiding his feelings. "I'll be there pretty much every day." He indicated his writing on the paper.
Castle nodded, folding it and shoving it into his pocket without looking at it. "I'll be in touch tonight. I promise." The boy gave a curt nod and a shy wave as he walked away.
Castle pulled out his phone before the next group came forward, and called his lawyer, despite the angry looks from Paula. "Yeah, you know that fan mail that you weed out, the really crazy ones? How long do you keep that?"
"A son?" Kate's mouth dropped across the booth from him at Remy's.
He shrugged. "Maybe, I don't know! But he looks like me, and he has Alexis' eyes, and I remember his mother's name, and I think the dates match up."
"You remember his mother?" She looked hurt by that thought, a flash of insecurity flashed in her eyes that he thought she had managed to conquer.
"Yeah." She pulled away from him, her arms crossing across her chest. He sighed and rolled his eyes. "I thought we were past all that? Yes, I slept with her, almost fourteen years ago. Why does that mean anything to you now?"
Her arms lowered as his words sunk in. "You're right," she conceded, her voice soft, "it's a lot to take in though."
"You're telling me!" She chuckled at that, relaxing a bit as she studied his face.
"You do realize that when we talked about starting a family, this isn't exactly what I had in mind." She teased, raising her eyebrows and smirking at him.
"This wasn't my plan either." He protested, relaxing slightly as he saw her reassuring grin. She shifted closer to the table, reaching out to hold his hand. He could still see the uncertainty on her features, despite her closeness. "The ink on my divorce papers had just dried, and I was feeling like a failure. My second marriage was over, and I thought that I would never find my perfect match. I hate to admit it, but Charlotte was a way for me to not feel like a failure anymore."
She squeezed his hand a bit tighter, and more traces of unease slipped away as he explained. "I'd be lying if I said I had never done that. Mostly in college, but I've been there." She tapped his hand, moving to her burger. "What do you want to do next?"
He shrugged. "I don't know, there aren't exactly information pamphlets about this." He popped a french fry into his mouth. "He gave me his hair."
Kate laughed, releasing the tension in the air around them. "What did you do with it?"
He pulled the bag out of his pocket. "It's here. But I didn't know if it would be easier to do it in the lab, with Lanie. And I didn't want to do anything without talking to you." He pulled out the piece of paper, with Zachary's information, which had remained in his pocket since the book signing that afternoon. "This is his address, if you want to go meet him with me?"
She chuckled, snatching the paper from his hand. "You have to bring your cop wife? What did you do to this woman?" She teased him as she unfolded it, her voice laced with laughter. As she glanced at the writing, her energy changed. She set her mouth and became serious, pushing it towards him and meeting his eyes. "Castle. This is a room number at Mount Saini."
The cancer ward. His son was spending time in the cancer ward. And all Rick could think was that he just met this child, his child, just to lose him. Would it even be worth it to start a relationship if Zach was going to be gone soon? But by denying a relationship, who would he be protecting, Zachary or himself? He had to take a deep breath to stop his racing mind. They didn't even know if Zachary was his yet. It didn't matter if he had felt an inexplicable tug toward the boy from the moment their eyes met. It didn't matter if he thought Zachary looked like he used to, if he made Alexis' facial expressions. It didn't matter that he felt so sure of it. They just didn't know, and it didn't help the situation if he started freaking out about things now.
When he entered the room, Castle was relieved to see Zachary sitting beside the bed instead of being in the bed. Guilt for that reaction spread throughout his body once he realized who was in the bed. Charlotte was asleep, she didn't even see them enter. She looked thin, so thin, and Castle could feel his heart breaking in two as he took the sight of her in. Before he could call out to the boy, a large older man blocked his vision. "Who are you? What do you want here?" His eyes were puffy and red, and the dark circles underneath them revealed his lack of sleep. But despite all of that, he was intimidating, menacing, because how dare they interrupt his last few weeks with his loved one.
Castle felt Kate's grip on his arm tighten as he took a few steps back. He admired the older man for his dedication to his family, his dedication to scare away unwanted visitors. He figured he would be the same way if Alexis was ever sick. The exchange caught Zach's attention, and he hopped up from the chair at her bedside and walked toward them. He placed his hand on the older man's shoulder, the touch so soft that Castle wondered if the older man even felt it. "Grandpa, they're here to talk to me." Castle watched the man shrink a bit at Zachary's soft voice, and he slowly made his way back to the chairs next to the door. An older woman was asleep there, her head resting in her fist. It couldn't be comfortable. As the man sat down, she leaned against him instead, a sad sigh escaping her lips. What had they walked into?
Zachary pointed out the door. "We can talk in the waiting room." He led the way down the hallway, a labyrinth to Castle, but the boy knew his way around. The waiting room was empty when they arrived, and Zachary led them to a table in the far corner. Castle could imagine him hunched over, working on his homework at this little table, his shaggy hair hanging in the corners of his eyes. Zach turned to Kate and held out his hand. "Hi, I'm Zach."
She smiled at him, but Castle could see the sadness in her eyes as she took it all in. "Kate. It's nice to meet you."
Zach trained his eyes on Castle. "Did you test the hair?"
Castle shook his head. "Not yet. There's a chain of custody issue, it would be easier to take you to the lab with me." He offered, and saw his wife grin in the corner of his eye as he threw out police words. "I thought we could make a day out of it, but if you didn't want to, I'd understand."
He shrugged. "I mean, I love my Mom, but I want to get out of here sometimes." He glanced back at Kate, pulling at the bottom of his ear. "I just thought that since you brought your lawyer, you must have tested the hair."
Kate grinned then, chuckling softly. "I'm not a lawyer." She was dressed up more than usual, her hair pulled back into a bun, and a nicer blazer, which she pushed aside revealing her badge. "I did have to testify in court today, but I'm a cop."
"She's my wife." Castle continued, offering a shy smile. "I just thought that if you wanted to spend more time with me, then it would be cool for you to meet her too." He broke out into a huge grin at that point as he imagined all the stuff they could do together, as a family. "Oh, and you're going to love Alexis! She's your sister, she's 20, but she's really cool. And your Grandmother is just out of this world, I can't wait for you to meet her too." He stopped then, realizing that he hadn't told them yet, that he had no clue how they would respond.
He could see Zach retreating into his chair, his fingers pulling at his earlobe again. "I mean, I'm sure they are, but this is all kind of sudden, and I'm not even sure you are my father yet. I mean, Mom was really sure, but this is all overwhelming for me."
Castle nodded. "Of course. right." He tried to slow his thoughts, tried to take things down a notch. His hands rubbed up and down his legs a few times, rooting him back to the present moment. "How did you find out about me anyway?"
Zach crossed his arms, as if he was worried he would get in trouble. A thought that Castle found mildly amusing, because he had never needed to discipline this child. "I sort of read her diary. This whole entry actually about how you were such a good father to your daughter, and how much it hurt her that I never had that."
Castle felt guilty again, the feeling like a boulder in the pit of his stomach. Kate reached out and took his hand, squeezing it tightly. "I'm trying to figure out what happened, why I never heard about you. But I promise you, that is going to change. I'll be here no matter what. Starting tomorrow. What do you say we meet my friend Lanie tomorrow at the precinct to do the DNA test, and get dinner? And then I'll bring you back here."
Zachary nodded slowly. "I go to school at the Literary Arts Academy, I'm in the Dual Language Program. Pick me up there?"
Castle nodded and smiled at the boy. "Of course, see you there."
A/N: Tumblr prompt from castlefanficprompts. Castle has another child [ teen ]He didn't know it.
I AM POSTING THIS ON ALL MY STORIES FOR THE MONTH OF APRIL! April is Sexual Assault Awareness month, which, as you may know, means a lot to me personally. I have a video, www DOT youtube DOT com SLASH watch?v=5fz8t8mrDe4 where I talk about how I want to change the world, by getting us survivors to start talking about how we are survivors and proud. By getting us to stop hiding in the shadows, because we are not the ones who should feel ashamed. If we don't come forward and raise our voices, we won't ever change anything. That, and if I had seen a video like mine, I may have come forward sooner, and would have been out of a dangerous situation faster, and I hope that this will actually save someone. That, and I made a facebook page, facebook DOT com SLASH ordinaryisextraordinary. Here, I have an album of survivor photos and I post articles and inspirational quotes. It would mean so much to me if you all could share this information, like the page or something, just to help get the word out. Because in my mind, this can save lives. I'm going to post this same update on all of my stories throughout the month of April because of the awareness, so I'm sorry if it bothers you.