The Critical Mass
Disclaimer: I don't own Community. Sadly.
Now that she's living with Troy and Abed, Annie is pleased to find that she sees more of the rest of the study group as well. It's like the three of them living together achieved some sort of critical mass that pulled the others towards Casa de Trobed.
It's different from when she lived in her tiny apartment over Dildopolis. She doesn't have to avoid eye contact with her neighbours (except for the super since that incident with Abed's Batman dvd and the shoe closet) and it's nice to come home to find other people around. Annie takes a few days to get used to waking up to the sounds of Troy and Abed having an early morning session in the Dreamatorium or listening to the sounds of yet another episode of Inspector Spacetime through her door at night, but it's infinitely better than the sounds of the spruiker at Dildopolis announcing their two for one handcuff specials all through the night.
Shirley visits daily at first. They'd open the door to find Shirley standing there with the ingredients for pies or brownies and she'd make herself at home in the kitchen. The group's attempts to stage an intervention for her baking habit failed miserably when they realised they'd all come to miss the daily portion of brownies Shirley would pull out of her handbag.
"You don't have to bake for us, Shirley." Annie tried to tell her at first. Annie could understand why Shirley would feel the need to bake for Troy and Abed; when she'd first moved in she discovered their diet consisted primarily of kool-aid, Lucky Charms and leftover falafel from Abed's dad's shop.
"Oh, but I like to do it, Ann-ie." Shirley would coo as she fussed around the small kitchen. "Besides, I just want to keep an eye on you here. I don't know how things are done in the Jewish Church, but in mine it's just not right for a girl to live with two men who aren't her brothers."
"Shirley!" It isn't surprising that Shirley feels this way and probably the only surprise that Annie feels is that it's taken the older woman this long to voice her concerns. "It's Troy and Abed. I know I used to think I was in love with Troy, but he and Abed are like my brothers now. Besides, can you seriously see a girl distracting them from dressing up as Inspector Spacetime and Constable Reggie?"
Shirley makes a non-commital sort of hmm noise as she stirs her ingredients. But after that day, her visits are less regular and she's able to stop herself from muttering "I knew it, I knew it. It's not right." when Annie shows any sort of friendly affection towards the two boys.
Pierce will occasionally show up at strange times, mostly when he knows that Abed is at a film class. Annie gets that he misses Troy and suspects that his tales of life in the mansion are his way of trying to lure Troy back. She remembers how Pierce seemed okay with Troy and Abed moving in together at the boys' house warming party and wonders if her moving in has changed his mind. After all, he still refers to her as his favourite.
She doesn't see much of her own dad since the divorce, and despite his many, many, many flaws, Annie has come to see Pierce as sort of a de facto father. He hasn't offered her money again, but he'll occasionally offer to fix broken things around the apartment. Living with Troy and Abed results in a lot of broken things but, remembering the state she found her old apartment in after leaving Pierce alone to fix the electrical outlet, Annie's always quick to distract him with questions about his new business plans until he forgets his offer.
At first, Britta turns up to "ensure that Annie has not succumbed to the inevitable peer pressure to take on a traditional female role in the apartment and become chained to the kitchen sink". She's appalled to discover that Annie does indeed do most of the domestic work but after witnessing the boys' attempts to clean the bathroom descend into an experiment on whether they can make enough bubbles to fill the room by pouring the entire bottle of Annie's strawberry bubble bath into the bath, Britta realises that Annie's supposed enslavement is actually a sort of essential community service to preventing the apartment from being completely destroyed.
It doesn't become uncommon for Annie to come home and find Britta slumped on the floor in front of the recliners watching reruns of Cougar Town or Inspector Spacetime. Eventually, Annie notices that Britta always leans against Troy's recliner and that Troy takes a suspiciously long time to walk Britta down to her car at night. The mere fact that Britta is allowing Troy to walk her to her car at all is telling. Annie makes a mental note not to mention this development to Shirley as she's sure to take it as a sign that she was right all along about their un-Christian living arrangement and that she, Annie, will inevitably end up ruined like some regency debutante that stepped out onto a balcony with the wrong man.
When she moves in with Troy and Abed, Annie is surprised to discover Jeff's weekly visits. It turns out Tuesday is the day he comes over to play Call of Duty, something that lasts long into the night and occasionally ends with Jeff sleeping awkwardly in one of the recliners.
The first time Annie had emerges from her bedroom on a Wednesday morning to find Jeff doing situps in the middle of the living room, she squeaks in surprise and alarm and dives back into her room to put a robe over her pajama shorts and tank.
The apartment feels so much smaller with Jeff filling up the kitchen with his tallness and handsomeness and pecs and Annie finds herself somewhat irritated that she wakes up with panda eyes from the mascara she didn't completely get off the night before, while Jeff looks just like he's stepped out of a Gap commercial. But then he offers to make omelettes (with egg whites only) for breakfast and Annie forgives him.
After the third time Annie discovers Jeff in the kitchen on a Wednesday morning pulling faces as he stretches out his cramped muscles, she suggests to Troy and Abed that they invest in a foldout couch or inflatable mattress for unexpected guests. It seems ridiculous for Jeff to sleep in a chair and it doesn't occur to her to suggest moving Call of Duty night to Jeff's apartment where's there's a couch and a spare room.
The next week, Annie is woken up after midnight by the sounds of constant squeaking. She gets out of bed and opens her door to see Jeff working a tiny bicycle pump to inflate the mattress. At the rate he's going, it will be morning before he finishes.
"It's going kinda slow," Troy comments "Why don't you try doing it in super speed like they do on tv?"
Annie holds in a giggle at the look on Jeff's face as he works at holding in what promises to a snarky comment. She'd noticed that he'd been making attempts to relate more to Troy and upon questioning he'd told her it was one of several things his therapist had set him to work on. She doesn't ask about the other things.
"Probably we should have got a bigger pump." Abed notes, looking at the comically small pump that is dwarfed even further by Jeff's hands.
"You guys," Annie finally steps out from her room. "This is ridiculous. Jeff, you can take my bed and I'll sleep in the recliner."
"Not necessary. I'll just drive home."
"Don't be stupid. You've had far too much to drink and I wouldn't get any sleep thinking you'd wrapped your Lexus around a tree."
"Annie, it's touching that you're thinking about my welfare, but I'm not kicking you out of your bed."
"Actually, I'm more concerned about the Lexus. I kind of like that car." His mouth quirks up slightly at that and Annie smiles back. "Seriously, Jeff. I'm half your size and those recliners are comfy."
He's still making excuses and Annie notices Abed's eyes flicking back and forth between them like he's watching a tennis match.
She can tell he's going to refuse her again, so she plays her trump card. "Or, we could just share the bed, Jeff. Problem solved, right?"
"Uh, um, you see, that wouldn't be, I couldn't…you're right, the recliners are pretty comfortable, I'm sure you'll sleep well."
Annie grins at how easily she can turn all the awkwardness and embarrassment back on to Jeff. It's amazing how a few early mornings of the guy you kind of lo…like seeing you as some sort of anti-Disney Princess makes you more comfortable around him.
Troy has gone into the blanket fort and Abed's disappeared to the bathroom, so Annie shows Jeff into her room. The covers are flipped back and there's a dent in her pillows, so she efficiently straightens the sheets and fluffs out the pillow.
Jeff's kicking off his shoes and taking off his belt and suddenly the awkwardness is back, so Annie grabs her grandmother's quilt from her cupboard and one of the throw pillows she'd earlier stacked on the floor.
"Night, Annie." Jeffs calls out as she scurries from the room. She calls out a quick goodnight and then she curls up into one of the chairs. Considering she's a whole foot shorter than Jeff, she can easily make herself a comfortable little nest but the thought of Jeff sleeping in her bed a few feet away makes her bury her face in the quilt and let out a little hyperactive yelp.
She's been awake for an hour when she realises she left her retainer on her bedside table. The face of her stern orthodontist warning her to wear it every night without fail compels her to sneak into her room. Jeff's left the door ajar, and there's enough moonlight coming through the window that she can easily make her way into the room.
She has to stuff her fist into her mouth to stop a squeal escaping when she notices Jeff's jeans and shirt slung over the end of the bed and then she looks over to see him lying curled up in her bed, his face relaxed and missing its customary smirk.
He looks so young and she finds herself leaning over him to tug the covers up over his bare shoulders. He's sleeping on the right side – she always sleeps on the left – and the temptation to crawl in beside him is so strong, but somehow Annie finds the strength to return to her recliner.
It becomes a regular thing for her to give Jeff her bed on Call of Duty night. She even starts playing herself and then she starts drinking the imported beer that Jeff brings with him. Surprisingly she's good at the game and finds herself taking on Jeff long after Abed and Troy have disappeared into the blanket fort.
"Ha! I win!" she crows, dropping her controller and throwing her hands up in the air in victory.
"Rigged." Jeff mutters, tossing back the rest of his beer. They're both quite drunk by now and Jeff sways slightly as he stands up.
"Don't get naked yet, Jeff," slurs Annie, scrambling to her feet as Jeff heads towards her room. "I need to get an extra blanket, s'cold."
He frowns at her and seems to notice for the first time that it's grown pretty cold. "You take the bed. You can't sleep out here, you'll freeze."
"Nuh-uh." She reaches up to poke him in the chest. "You're too big for the chair."
He opens his mouth to argue, but then changes his mind and leans forward to grab her and throw her over his shoulder. She squeals in alarm as he carries her in to her room and tosses her on the bed. "You're in here, I'm out there."
"Don't be stupid, Jeff." Annie props herself up with some difficulty. "Just sleep here. Look, we can put a pillow down the middle, it'll be fiiiiiiiiiine."
He's struggling with the decision but he's drunk enough that the usual excuses aren't popping up in his mind as easily as they normally do and in the end he just kicks the door closed and sits down heavily on the bed to take off his shoes. Annie burrows under the cover and turns her back when she sees his hands move to his shirt buttons. After a minute of listening to the rustling of clothes, the cover flips back and he slides in beside her, wedging a pillow firmly between their bodies.
Her heart races as she rolls towards the middle to see Jeff looking straight back at her, but now she's warm and in bed the alcohol is making her lids heavy and she's soon asleep.
The next morning, she wakes up to discover she's half sprawled across Jeff's chest and his arm is clamped firmly around her waist. The barrier pillow has been tossed to the floor and their legs are tangled together and it feels good. Annie tries to slip out of Jeff's embrace, but his grip tightens and she looks at his face to see two blue eyes regarding her with sleepy amusement.
"I was going to say this was a massive mistake," he says, his voice rough from sleep. Her heart sinks a little but he continues "but I'm sick of denying this."
And then he hauls her even more firmly onto him and he's kissing her like his life depended on it. She can feel all sorts of interesting things lying flush against his body and the blush rises in her cheeks, but she doesn't care.
They stay in bed all morning, ignoring the occasional knock on the door from Troy or Abed (it took her two weeks, but Annie has them trained to never enter her room without knocking and then being given the okay), and sometimes taking a break from the kissing to talk. It's decided that Annie will break the news to Shirley to lessen the chance of Shirley assaulting Jeff and that Jeff will tell his therapist that he's finally decided to stop lying to himself and choose what makes him happy.
Later that day after Jeff has finally managed to drag himself away if only to go home for clean clothes, Troy and Abed don't bat an eye when Annie rolls up the inflatable mattress and stores it high up in the coat closet, although Abed does murmur something about whether the Moonlighting curse will strike now that the will they, won't they suspense is gone. Annie can see the idea for a documentary forming and decides it's time for an urgent reminder on the importance of the knocking rule.
The End.