It was a peaceful, sunny day and Edward and Bella were sitting in their favorite medow gazing at each other in ways that only lovers would truly understand. Bella looked happily at Edwards sparkly skin, but was surprised when she saw a dark spot crawling up his chest. Slowly, as not to startle her blood sucking lover, Bella picked up the crawling dot and brought it up to examin it.
"Oh, Edward" she said "You had a tick on you!" She showed him the franticly struggling bug.
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Before she could even blink Edward was twenty feet away from her and breathing heavily.
"Whats wrong Edward?" Bella asked hesatently.
"Thats a-a-a-a-a TICK!" He cried out like a five year old child.
"Whats wrong with a tick?"
"Hello! Have you ever heard of lime desies?"
"You do realize that a tick can't even get through your skin...right?" Bella asked in a way that made it clear she was afraid that her lover was losing it.
"Yeah! But look at it! It looks so abnormal! AND...It sucks blood!" He said as if it made everything clear.
"So do you."
Edward blinked as though he hadn't thought of that before, but then said ,"Thats different, This thing kills humans! And animals!"
Bella looked at Edward for a moment, then placed the tick on the ground letting it run away. "Edward, lets go home now." she said in a rather irritated voice. Edward complied and allowed Bella to clamber clumsily onto his back. He dropped her off at her house and as she was walking to the front door he heard her mumbling something about hipocritical blood suckers.