Why does Prussia always hide in this room? He goes away for hours, locks himself in here, and when he comes back he immediately goes to get alcohol. What is so special about this room? It's just books from wall to wall! I didn't even think the bloody fool could read... Those were the thoughts of Roderich Edelstein before he entered Gilbert's 'forbidden' room. After tidying up the Prussian's room, yes, Prussia had a room in Austria's manor; the aristocrat had found a key labelled Study. Almost immediately, Roderich had guessed it was for this room and sure enough, it was correct.
After looking around the library like place, Austria had found out that all of the books were actually the Prussian's journals. There must've been thousands of journals in the mini library and Roderich began to wonder how the hell he never noticed Gilbert ever come in with books considering there were books that went right back to when they were just babies.
Finding a nearly empty section that was labeled '2000's', Austria pondered for a moment onto why there were only books up to 2004. Being the curious man he was, he picked the last book up and headed to the desk that was in the library and sat down. For the longest time Austria only starred at the book as he wondered if he should invade the Prussian's personal life or not but he decided he should considering how Gilbert just loved to mess with his life. Consider it payback. He placed the journal down onto the oak table and began to read.
'Dear my Awesome Diary,
No one believes in me anymore. No one thinks I can be the person I once was just because times have changed. After all the work I did to prove myself, since no one trusted a left handed albino kid in the Middle Ages, the work is basically useless now. Even my very own little brother, Ludwig, either doesn't trust me or thinks of me as an embarrassment or ever a burden! I don't know what I did to deserve this but I will never stop trying to find out. My country, Prussia, was dissolved in 1947, right after the Second World War ended. Germany took me in after my land was snatched up by the other countries. They took it when I was right there in front of them too! They don't care about me anymore but, to be completely honest, I doubt they ever did. Though, even through that, I never showed my rage or sadness to anyone but myself.
When the German Democratic Republic started building the Berlin Wall 14 years after I dissolved, dividing my brother, our people and myself for about 28 years, I never showed any of my weaknesses to the government. I had to represent the people Ludwig gave me, East Germany. I had to show them to be strong even thought those long, hard years that it would be fine. I didn't mind when Germany unified and East Germany became one with West Germany. I felt overjoyed to see my people be able to get a better life with the West's culture and people and I loved it to see families being reunited.
But you know, it really hurts when Ludwig wouldn't let me help with the paperwork. There is so much of the damn stuff! I swear, he's going to work himself to death one of these days. All he does is go to meetings all day, do paperwork all night and usually fall asleep at his desk! My theory is it's like he believes that if I touch any of the papers, it'll cause Germany to dissolve just like Prussia did. Whenever I asked if I could help, he always says, 'Go on Gilbert. You should live your own life to the fullest without paperwork.' And then he leaves before I can get any word in. It's frustrating you know.
I'm supposed to be the awesome Prussia for Gott's sake! Why does no one trust me? Are left handed albinos really that bad? I feel like I'm back in the Middle Ages with people trying to burn me at the stake.
Time is running out for me. To whomever found this and for some reason made it to the end, why the fuck did you read all this? Do you care about me and my un-awesome past? Does someone finally care? As soon as my body finally disappeared off the face of the Earth, now someone decided to show up?! God dammit. I wonder who will be reading this though. Probably Germany or Austria considering how they like to rummage through my stuff a lot to 'organize it'. Or maybe I'm just an idiot and my body isn't fading and I just found this after time. Who knows anymore but who cares.
The Awesome Prussia, Gilbert Beilschmidt.
-2004'
"The fool thought he was going to die? If he was going to die he would've on the day he dissolved!" Roderich said to himself as he flipped through the empty pages that were left in the journal. "Though... It does make somewhat sense. He was acting very oddly that year and this is probably the reason why-"
Austria's thoughts were stopped as he heard something drop near the door. His head whipped over to the door, causing his glasses to slip down his nose and his hair to go into his eyes. "Gilbert...?!"
The albinos fists clenched as he looked at the sight in front of him. "You're reading one of my journals. Why?" Prussia's voice came out basically as a growl, walking over to the desk.
Taking a moment to find his words and reasons, Austria bit his lip and he closed the journal but stayed in the seat. "You stopped writing in 2004. I was curious onto why and what happened. That is all-" Yet again, he was cut off by the angry Prussian.
"That does not mean you can go around reading my dia-... Journals! Those things are personal you idiot! Why else do you think I lock them up in here?!" He snapped, his crimson eye twitching in annoyance.
"I had no idea what you put in here and I found the key. I apologize for intruding on your personal life but I will have you know that you invade my personal belongings and activities all the time so consider it as if I am returning the favour."
Gilbert stayed quiet, unable to think of how to reply. Still stumped for words, he just snatched up his last journal and put it back on the shelf after he flipped through some of the pages just to check which one it was and what was in it. "Why did you have to read the stupidest one?"
"I beg your pardon?" Austria asked with a raised eyebrow as he pushed up his glasses.
"You heard me! You had to choose the one that I thought I was going to die!" Prussia grumbled, letting his anger fade away and it slowly started to become embarrassment. He did a good job to hide his emotions but this time, it was just a little too much to try and hide. He was flustered and embarrassed from knowing that Roderich had just read one of the stupidest times in his life.
With a sigh, Roderich leaned back in the chair and smirked at the white haired man. "I had no idea what was in it. It was just the last one that you had written and I want to know why you had stopped but, it seems that I still don't know onto why you stopped."
Those words made Gilbert cringe a bit as he himself didn't know why he stopped writing. He knew why he stopped for the year of 2004 but it was 10 years later and he never picked up writing again. "... I stopped for the year of 2004 because I thought that was my last year for some reason and I wanted to end it without a cliff-hanger or something for someone who found it. I didn't start again because... Well... As un-awesome as it sounds, I have no fucking clue onto why. I guess it's because nothing awesome has happened and I didn't have anything to write about." He said with a shrug. That was the only answer he could come up with right now and it was the best one that Roderich would get whether he liked it or not.
Somehow, Austria accepted that answer as valid. He could understand why Prussia wouldn't want to continue writing for that year and if nothing happened, what was there to write? It was completely understandable. Though there was one more question he needed answered. "Why is it that you never said anything about these journals? Or rather, how could you hide them for so long?" He said as he got up and walked around the room, curious to look at the dates of each section.
Prussia stayed quiet, picking up one of his books from when the Berlin Wall was up and smiled sadly at it. "I have no fucking clue. As awesome as I am, there are a lot of things that I have no clue onto how I succeeded in doing and you'll just have to deal with that, Spec's."
Austria's eyebrow twitched at the nickname and he let out a soft sigh, "Enough of the nicknames, Prussia. There is no need for those vile things... Honestly." The brunette said as he looked over to the other.
"Well that's just too bad now isn't it, Roddy?" Oh yes. This will totally bring up the mood, no doubt about it. Or at least, it would bring up his mood. In a way, he wanted to brighten Austria's mood too but he didn't really know how to make the Austrian happy. Everything that he did was wrong in the nation's eyes even if it was exactly what he wanted. Though he tried so often and with tons of effort, he could never succeed and it made him rather annoyed.
"Enough." Prussia just laughed as he heard the seriousness in Roderich's voice and put the book back. "Come on, lighten up Roderich. It's just a nickname. It's nothing bad! It won't kill you!" He said, rolling his eyes.
Closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose, Roderich gave the smallest of nods and headed towards the door. "Fine. Whatever you say, Gilbert."
Prussia waited until the door was closed and the tapping of Austria's shoes on the marble floors couldn't be heard anymore before he went over to his oak desk and pulled out an empty journal. He wrote on the side 'February 11, 2014' on the side of the book so he could continue his numbering before he put it down and began his newest entry. Oh this one would be perfect just like all the rest! There's no way his writing couldn't be perfect. He was too awesome to not be a perfect writer!
