I just felt like it. Don't ask. XD! We need more humor stories by meh. X3!
Panty Raids & Kissy Kisses
Rated: +18 - language; heavy mentions of sex
Summary: a chatroom story that involves online romance, car sex, stalking & Jeff's edible panties. XD! Written on impulse.
Genre: Humor/General
SexOnARainbow signed on
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR signed on
SxEAngelFace signed on
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: SxEAngelFace? You must be joking...
SxEAngelFace: 'Cause I'm such an innocent little angel. X3!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...you fucked my English teacher.
SxEAngelFace: he raped me.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...the moans said it all.
SxEAngelFace: ha, he wants me.
SexOnARainbow: Great, my brother & my best friend are internet-sexing in front of me.
SxEAngelFace: ...Jeff?
SexOnARainbow: now, that I'm finally out of the house, I can tell you, Matty. I fucked at least thirty guys every date & I've been doing this since I was 12. The babysitter that you employed was awesome. I'm currently wearing edible panties. Love you.
SxEAngelFace: FREEDOM! XD!
SexOnARainbow: Matt?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...
SexOnARainbow: Matt?
IGOTAFUCKING CAR: Imma kill you! Imma find you & destroy you & kill you & kill you & kill you & DID I MENTION THAT I WAS GONNA FIND YOU & DESTROY YOU & KILL YOU?!
SexOnARainbow: ...did you even read my username? I've had it since I was five.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...
SxEAngelFace: he reads my username & he doesn't read yours. Ha, he wants me!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: Imma kill him too! YOU'RE BOTH GONNA DIE! You're both gonna be destroyed! BOTH OF YOU!
SexOnARainbow: ...well, I'm out of the state, so I'm happy!
SxEAngelFace: speak for yourself, selfish, selfish boy.
SexOnARainbow: by the way, Matty, Adam is awesome in bed.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...YOU TOUCHED MY BEST FRIEND?! HOLY SHIT! YOU ARE GROUNDED! Wait-you-I-
SexOnARainbow: I have been waiting SO many years to say that!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...Imma...Imma...
SxEAngelFace: drive him over with your new fucking car! What's a 'fucking car' by the way?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: how did he pass high school?!
SxEAngelFace: I wore Jeff's thongs.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I hate you so much.
SxEAngelFace: I love you too, doll face.
SexOnARainbow: Aww! ChipMUNK fluff!
SxEAngelFace: the 'fucking car' makes more sense than Jeff.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I'm surrounded by idiots.
SexOnARainbow: except me! I'm the only one that's in college!
SxEAngelFace: you're a nerd for God's sake!
SexOnARainbow: a sexy nerd.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: Jeffro, when I visit you, I swear you won't live until your 18th birthday.
SxEAngelFace: he already turned 18.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...not if I say so.
SxEAngelFace: that's the stupidest thing I heard!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I know where you live.
SxEAngelFace: I mean...stupidly right. RIGHT. It's right.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: nice save!
SexOnARainbow: So, Matty, tell me about this car of yours.
SxEAngelFace: me and Matt are going to use it to go around people's houses and panty-raid them & then we fuck in it. Is that what a 'fucking car' is?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...Punkers, you're glad you have your looks.
SxEAngelFace: why?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: may he be happy that he's not sitting right next to me or he'd be long dead by now.
SxEAngelFace: ...
SxEAngelFace: why?
SexOnARainbow: I'll tell you later.
SxEAngelFace: yay! Oh, I need to tell you something! I got a kissy kiss from Marky Mark!
SexOnARainbow: ...that's not shocking.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: it is. They didn't have sex yet.
SxEAngelFace: haha, Mr. Hardy Har har.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ... you want me.
SxEAngelFace: that's my line!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I can steal stuff from you!
SxEAngelFace: ...I swear he's going to a panty raid in my house. There's a mysterious guy who's been stealing my underwear. Any thoughts?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...
SexOnARainbow: Matty, give Phil his underwear back.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: why would I have his underwear for?
SxEAngelFace: 'cause it's hot.
SexOnARainbow: *giggles*
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I can still hear that girly giggle from here.
SexOnARainbow: you know you're daydreaming of me.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...why is everyone I know a conceited bitch?
ILoveMyAbs signed on
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: speaking of conceited bitches...
ILoveMyAbs: shut up. You know you want me.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: okay, why do I want like fifteen people?!
SexOnARainbow: *gaspgasp* DAMMIT! He calls me a slut when he's a playa.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ... you are a slut. I'm not a playa. Hell, the only person I ever made love to is the food in my mouth.
SxEAngelFace: wait, you're a virgin?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: it's not funny.
ILoveMyAbs: I love you guys's conversations! They always make me laugh! XD!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: now, he's gonna XD everything we say.
ILoveMyAbs: XD!
SxEAngelFace: Matty, if you're a virgin, I'd love to teach you a few moves...
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: bitch.
SxEAngelFace: sexy bitch.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: you make me want to befriend some emo kids! I swear! Everyone loves themselves a little too much!
SxEAngelFace: like you don't. Remember last night?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: ...
ILoveMyAbs: XD!
SexOnRainbow: oohh...what happened last night?!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR signed off
SxEAngelFace signed off
SexOnARainbow: DAMMIT!
SexOnARainbow signed off
ILoveMyAbs: hello? Anyone here?
ILoveMyAbs signed off
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR signed on
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: what? My internet just cut me off.
SxEAngelFace signed on
SxEAngelFace: same story!
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: jeezum. You think Jeff would be dying to know what happened.
SxEAngelFace: Imma meet you in a minute for our ice cream run.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I'll pick you up in my car.
SxEAngelFace: do we really have to fuck? 'Cause I'm tired! I mean, Adam really hit me at the wrong angle.
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: O.O. Me & Adam need to have a serious talk later on. And no, you don't need to fuck in a fucking car.
SxEAngelFace: then why is it called a fucking car?
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR: I'll tell you later.
SxEAngelFace: alright!
SxEAngelFace signed off
IGOTAFUCKINGCAR signed off
Y2J/Metallicafan&IronMaidenfan&KISSlove signed on
Y2J/Metallicafan&IronMaidenfan&KISSlove: & they wonder why I never go on chatrooms. There's no one here!
I had a ton of fun writing this. X3!
X Sam.