Shoot me now
A/N...ok so this is my first time delving into the wonderful world that is known as True Blood (as a writer anyway) I own nothing (but wish I had Eric) and make no profit from this all of the characters belong to CH and or AB…now own with the show!
"Please …..Please don't do this to me I…I won't do it again I promise really do….I swear"!
I sigh as I look down at the pathetic excuse of a vampire that is Lonny (well…about to be "was Lonny") "It's not my call Lonny" I say. "You're the one who broke the rules, this was your third strike and now…..you're out"
"But ...but they provoked me!" he stammered. "They got what was commen to em!"
"Yea yea sure sure" I say as I wave off his excuse. "that's what you said the last two times this happened"
"BUT THEY DID!" he yells back at me from the pavement.
"Lonny for god sakes grow a pair why don't ya! You massacred a fucken retirement home!" how in the hell could a bunch of old weak breathers who can't even walk around on their own provoke you into slaughtering them? I mean come on, that's just sad."
I…I…..I…don't know…Uhhhh…give me one more chance please! I swear on my momma's grave that it won't happen again I promise". He begs as he grabs onto my black combat boots. "Let go of me…now." My voice holds no emotion a bi-product of the job I've been doing for the last 2 hundred years or so. More so now that we vamps have decided to "come out of the coffin" now that we're public knowledge the higher ups have set stricter rules. Ones like 'no killing humans in public' or 'no attacking without being provoked' and the one that Lonny apparently forgot 'no mass murders' and that's the reason im here in this tiny po-dunck town in Kentucky.
"Lonny Lonny Lonny" I sigh as a look at him. "swearen on your momma's grave aint going to help you now. You broke the rules and now you got to pay the price. You're lucky I'm the one here and not one of the other captions."
"What's gonna happen to me?" he wines
"well….this is your third offence so….." i rub the back of my neck and look at my boot.(hmm need to get new laces.)
"WELL what's gonna happen to me! Is it gonna be like last time and I get my fangs pulled or locked in a coffin wrapped in sliver for 13 months?"
He was practically shaking with anticipation at my answer (o how I loved this job sometimes) "you die" I state flatly.
Ahh the look on his face…priceless now that was a Kodak moment (damn it why don't I ever have a camera when I needed one)
"Die" he squeaked "but I don't wanna die"
"Hey you should of thought about that before you decided to go have a blood bath in that retirement home last week."
"I…but….they…old…." he rambled still sitting on the pavement struck dumb by the fact that tonight was going to be his last night.
(Well shit he's not even going to try to run for it, where's the fun in that?) I reached behind me and took one of my dual the swords off my back.
I held up the blade to examine it. The hilt was leather, jet black in color with what looked like blue lace engraved into it. The guard, a deep purple, the shape reminiscent of water was smooth and cool to the touch. Then was the blade, long and sharp made of cold hard steel, but the kicker was the edge, it was coated in a thin layer of sliver,(it was a bitch to clean if you forgot your gloves). I looked down at Lonny stilled unmoved from his spot on the ground. "Well better get this over with" I sighed. I had really hoped he would have put up some resistance but I guess that's too much to ask for. Lonny looks up at me with what the humans called the "deer in the head lights" look but he didn't get a chance to say anything else. In one swift movement of my arm his head was removed from his body bringing him to his final death.
I put my sword back in it sheath and proceeded to dispose of Lonny's body. I grabbed one of his arms and walked over to where his decapitated head lay and picked it up by the hair. There was a land fill a little ways back that would do nicely for what I had in mind, I went to my Jeep that was parked by some trees. (damn it should of brought some plastic bags, now im going to get his blood on seats) at the land fill I discarded Lonny's body on top of a pile of trash so the sun could take care of the rest. Getting in my jeep I pulled out my cell and hit #2 and waited…for financial aid press 1….to connect to your nearest true blood distributor press 2 (god why did they have to go automated) for a A.V.L rep in your area press 3….and to speak to one of our operators press 4…*beep* you have pressed number 4 speak to one of our operators if this is a mistake please press 1 if you wish to continue with option 4 please press 2…*beep*.. you have pressed 2 connect to your nearest true blood distributor (WHAT THE HELL!) if this is a mistake press 1..*beep*.. Thank you please hold. I sat in the driver's seat fighting the erg to throw my cell into the nearest body of water I could find. About a year ago the main office decided to make their phone system automated 'to make things easier" was the reason they had given us. "pffft easier my ass, dealing with this thing makes me wants stake myself". (One agent actually did after…being on hold for 6 hours straight and having to listen to 'what's new pussy cat' over and over, I think most would just say "fuck it" and end their lives right then and there)but I had to report in and this was the only freaken way to do that. So after what seemed like years of listing to show tunes someone finally picked up the other end.
"Thank you for holding, how may I help you" the voice on the other end droned
"yea I need to check in with V.C.T.F head quarters if you don't mind" I said through clenched teeth
"ok one moment please"
…..
"Vampire Control Task Force. How may I direct your call?" asked an overly perky receptionist.
"Put me through to Captain Marshal"
"One moment please" came the reply from the other end
"Captain Marshal who is this?"
"Nexsis Luka Riley squad 6 captain" (my parents had a thing for odd names I guess)
"Ahhh….. Luka my girl how is Kentucky?"
"Same as every place I have been sent to… boring"
"oh so I assume Mr. Keller was not much of a problem then."
"No….. He sat there like a rock, didn't even put up a fight" I huffed into the phone.
"Hmmm….. well im sorry to hear that" sounding a little distracted.
"sooooo can I come back now I really want to get out of this state…(no offence)"
"hmmm let me see here" I hear typing on a computer.
I start to zone out when I hear Cpt. Marshal say something.
"hummm oh what was that?" I ask
*sigh* "I said u need to make arrangements to fly back to Romania right away there is urgent business that needs to be taken care of ."
" got it be there ASAP " I say
I throw my cell in the back and head off to my hotel so I can make the proper arrangements.
3 weeks later
I hate my life (well technically 'un-life') but that didn't matter now because when I got back to Romania it was in a state of disarray. The reason; increased Supe activity in the southern parts of the US. Their solution: divide all areas in half and add another Sheriff, so it's like 2 Sheriff's for one area (whoopedy freaken doo) but that wasn't the worst part. Instead of getting vamps that were qualified to do that job they are bringing in Captains and Lieutenants from the V.C.T.F, to me it's a little bit of over kill. So here I am on a plain on my way to Louisiana to meet the queen (yey me)
As I arrive at Queen Sophie-Ann's Mansion I notice the giant guys in black suits. (all mussel and no brains I bet) I smile to myself as that thought passes through. After a rather annoying pat down I was sitting next to the queen ….playing yahtzee with two of her "pets" ( I hated yahtzee …..i sucked at it)
"well you're going to be partnered up with area 5"
"oh …who is the acting Sheriff of that area?" I asked only half caring what the answer was going to be
"hmm let me think..Oh Eric Northmen"
"what?" I asked. If had been alive I would have had a heart attack or keeled over right there.
"Eric Northmen…is the acting Sheriff of area there a problem?" the Queen asked.
" no ..no problem at all its just…"
The queen looked at me telling me to continue
"It's just we have a history" I mumbled under my breath.
"ohh do tell" Sophie-Ann cooed like a teenage girl.
"It's nothing like that" I started (well to be honest not for a long time)
"Oh well you should be going so you can make it before sunrise"
"Yes my queen" I said as I got up and headed out the door.
Shit shit shit this had to be the worst thing that could happen to me. I mean out of any area in this state I got stuck in the one where I had to work with Eric Northman. The same Eric Northman that I had spent the first few decades of my new life as a vampire stuck around just because our makers had a "thing" for each other. We were only a year or two apart him being older than me (which he liked to rub in my face on occasion) he might have been stronger than me but I could run circles around him (I wasn't human when I was alive. I still don't know what I was…am…whatever) we just didn't get along to well, maybe it was because we were relatively young. I didn't know but what I did know was, was that Eric Northman knew how to annoy the hell out of me, that also meant I knew how to do the same to him. (muhahaha I can't wait to see the look on his face when he sees me)
When I arrived at Fangtasia I wanted to laugh my ass off. There was a line out the door of humans wanting to get in and mingle with the vampires, a female vamp was standing outside carding them. (that must be Pam Eric's progeny… I can see that) she had that look about her that said she didn't give a fuck what you thought and if you did you can shove it.
I walked up to her.
"im here to see Eric Northmen"
"Well doll so is every other human here so you're just going to have to wait in line like everyone else"
(Why do they always think im a god damned human….ok my skin is not the normal "vampire pale" I never lost the tan I had when I was human)
"im not here to worship him like some spineless little breather " now that made her look up.
"oh you must be the new Sheriff" she said in a bored tone. But I didn't blame her I would be bored too if I had to card humans on a nightly basis.
"yea that's me…unfortunately" I mumbled the last part so that not even she could hear it.
If I had thought the outside was funny to look at then the inside would have had me holding my sides, but I didn't let my amusement show.
I had heard about the "fang-bangers" but never really got to see one in person, my job not really allowing me time to go to vamp bars not that I wanted to anyway….I found them demining. I looked up toward the back of the bar and there he was. Eric Northmen…sitting on what only could be described as a thrown…looking at me like he was seeing a ghost. I smiled and waved. (This was going to be fun)
AN/ ok that's the first chapter tell me what you think hate it, love it, like it, want me to burn it? Your reviews help me keep going and make me extremely hyper…next chapter is going to have some Eric POV (YEY!) I love suggestions and how I can incorporate them into this story. Any questions just ask me and I will answer