Title: Thunderstorms
Summary: Naoi is afraid of thunderstorms and Otonashi is there to help. Or, maybe kissing in the rain does have some value. Unestablished. Oneshot.
Warnings: Cursing. Angst. Major fluff at the end. An author who has only watched the anime and who hasn't read the manga.
My tribute to the severely lacking OtonashixNaoi fandom. There is no basis for Naoi being afraid of thunderstorms, but I thought it was a nice touch. Also, I was so excited to post this that there is little to no hardcore editing. I hope you all enjoy it anyway!
"But I have stuff to do!"
"I don't care."
"I need to help Kanade check the lightning rods for the incoming storm!"
"She can do it herself."
"I need to get more ammunition from the Guild!"
"I have extra."
"I need to-"
"God dammit, Otonashi! I just need you to do me a quick favor! I'm not asking you to challenge Noda to an axe duel or anything!" Otonashi gave Yuri a glare. The girl just flipped her hair and stared back.
"That's not even funny."
"It wasn't meant to be. Now get your ass over to Yui and tell her that we need a distraction for tomorrow's Operation Tornado." Otonashi brightened as he heard the innocuous instructions.
"Oh! That's all? When you called me over, you sounded really ominous, and no offense, but you're kinda known for being...well, for being a little..." Otonashi trailed off awkwardly as a number of unkind words sprang to mind.
"Sadistic?"
Otonashi flushed and nodded. Yuri flicked a hand at him, rolling her bright sea green eyes.
"Whatever. Just try to get back to your dorm before the storm hits." Glancing out of the window, she added, "It looks like a bad one." Otonashi shrugged.
"Will do, Yuri." Otonashi gave a mock salute before turning to head out of the door.
"Wait. Do you really need more ammo?" Yuri asked, raising an eyebrow. The blush returned to Otonashi's cheeks in full force.
"Um, no. Not really." Yuri smirked.
"I didn't think so." Otonashi hurried out of the door, feeling Yuri's eyes rest on his back as he left.
Otonashi headed down the hallway, and gave a glance to the gathering thunderclouds visible outside. Dammit. Yui was probably in the residential building. He would have to cross the grounds and risk being caught in the storm to get to her. He started jogging down the hallway. He would have to be very fast to beat the storm.
The classrooms flying by began to blur together as Otonashi sped up. Colors bled into each other, shadowy with the looming thunderclouds. All of those classrooms held so many memories, and although not all of them were pleasant, Otonashi cherished every one.
When he was alive, Otonashi never really had many friends. When he was training to be a doctor, he didn't have any time to focus on his social life, and when he was in grade school, he just didn't care. But now, in the afterlife, he had met so many wonderful people, and became closer to them than he had thought was possible when he was alive. It was a strange feeling. Not a disliked feeling, per se, but strange. Before he died, the only person that Otonashi could really trust himself to love was his little sister. Now, whenever Otonashi felt afraid, he took comfort in the knowledge that there was a whole team that had his back.
There was Yuri, who, while demanding and maybe a little scary at times, was determined and charismatic, and a leader in every sense of the word.
Kanade, who, for all her ostensible lack of emotion, was one of the purest people Otonashi had ever known.
Hinata, who, despite his suspiciously flirtatious comments, was cheerful and loyal and became Otonashi's best friend.
Even Yui became a close companion in spite of her hyperactive attitude and loud voice, because of her overall bright personality and even brighter dreams.
...And then there was Naoi. Otonashi wasn't sure that he could consider the boy his friend, but for some reason, the redhead couldn't seem to dislike Naoi the way he wanted to. Otonashi just couldn't forget the desperate yelling in the rain, and the way Naoi's eyes thawed as he slowly warmed and melted into Otonashi's embrace.
Boom.
Otonashi groaned as he heard the loud thunderclap. He slowed down to a walk as he caught the faint sound of raindrops hitting the roof. The world outside was misty with moisture, and Otonashi paused for a second to enjoy the quiet, dripping music.
It's kind of nice, he realized. I feel almost...peaceful. Shaking his head and smiling to himself, Otonashi pushed his red hair back and continued walking. He would have to run across the courtyard, but he'd then be able to relay Yuri's message to Yui and then go to his own dorm to sleep some more.
Suddenly, Naoi rounded the corner, running at full tilt, his choppy green hair flying. As he passed Otonashi, he crashed into the other boy's shoulder, but kept on running, without even an apology.
"Hey! Are you okay?" Otonashi called after the fleeing boy, holding his shoulder. Naoi didn't answer, and just bolted into the bathroom a few feet behind the redhead.
Oh my God, thought Otonashi. He looked really upset. What if he's about to cry? Or throw up? Someone needs to hold his hair back! Otonashi pictured Naoi bent over a toilet, desperately trying to grab all of his long green hair before it was too late.
With that thought in mind, Otonashi ran after the other boy, and as he swung the bathroom door open, Otonashi almost crashed into his target. Naoi, too distracted to notice Otonashi's presence, was leaning on one of the sinks, his forearms resting on the metal as his hands clenched into fists. Otonashi stopped short, silent enough in his shock to hear Naoi muttering to himself.
"D-dammit! I c-can't focus..." Otonashi didn't understand what the other boy meant until he caught sight of Naoi's eyes in the mirror.
Naoi's eyes were partially covered by his bangs, which stuck to his forehead with sweat. However, more importantly, what Otonashi could see of Naoi's irises flickered as it began to glow a deep, ominous red. Naoi began to speak again.
"Y-you're n-not afraid! You're not!" Naoi's voice grew stronger as his hypnotism began to work. "Th-the storm doesn't scare you. You are going to stay unafraid until-ah!"
This last was uttered as Naoi's eyes caught sight of Otonashi in the mirror. They slowly faded back to their original color as Naoi stuttered, fumbling for an excuse.
"I-it's not what you think!" Naoi finally choked out. Otonashi glowered, his horror transforming into anger, making the other boy shrink back. The redhead strode forward in one long step and grasped Naoi by the collar, wrenching their faces within inches of each other.
"It's exactly what I think!" Otonashi growled. "You're trying to hypnotize yourself."
"Y-you don't understand-"
"I understand just fine!" Otonashi yelled. "You're fucking mind-raping yourself. That is not okay."
"Otonashi-"
"What makes you think it's okay to mess with your mind like that?" Otonashi continued, ignoring Naoi's pleas. "What the hell were you thinking?"
"Otonashi-" Suddenly, another clap of thunder boomed, and Naoi shrieked and clapped his hands over his ears, sinking to the floor.
"Hey!" Otonashi cried, alarmed at Naoi's sudden change in attitude as the green-haired boy crouched, shivering on the bathroom floor. "Hey."
Otonashi slowly reached out a hand, as if the other boy was some kind of wild beast. The instant his hand touched Naoi's shoulder, however, the shivering boy pushed it away.
"D-don't touch me!"
Otonashi's face softened, and he tried again, softly laying his hand on Naoi's shoulder, and refusing to budge, even when the other boy pushed back again.
"Naoi." Otonashi crouched down to directly address the quivering boy. Naoi refused to respond. Otonashi sighed and lifted up Naoi's chin with two fingers, silently noting the temperature of his feverish skin.
When Naoi's eyes finally met Otonashi's, they were glistening with moisture, and the gleaming wet trails that ran down his cheeks were proof that some of the tears had escaped. Otonashi sighed again.
"Naoi. Are you...afraid of thunderstorms?"
Naoi's pink lips curved in a silent o as he gasped slightly, still refusing to speak. But the fear in his eyes spoke all that Otonashi needed to hear, and made a strange mix of compassion and protectiveness wash over the redheaded boy.
"Oh, Naoi-"
Suddenly, another thunderclap shook the air. Naoi gasped and flung his arms around Otonashi, burying his face in the redhead's jacket. Otonashi hesitated for a moment, surprise registering in his eyes, before he carefully wrapped his arms around the other boy, and cradled him as delicately as if he were made of glass. Otonashi let himself hold Naoi for just a little longer before gently pulling him up into a standing position and meeting his eyes with a single-minded determination.
"Let's get you out of here," he said, looking Naoi in the eyes, the two boys' foreheads inches away.
All Naoi could do was swallow and nod.
The closet was too small.
Otonashi knew this, he'd known it since he first barged in, Naoi under his arm, but dammit, he'd panicked and decided to settle in the first room he could find without windows. Even if it happened to be a supply closet.
Which, of course, the room was. Just Otonashi's luck.
Well, what was done was done, and there was no way in hell that Otonashi could bring himself to move Naoi, not when the boy looked so small, clinging to Otonashi's arm like it was a lifeline.
Otonashi carefully set Naoi down on the floor, making sure that the boy didn't bump his head against the cabinet. This done, Otonashi took a seat next to Naoi, one bent leg pressed against the wall and the other resting gently against Naoi's, their knees touching. The boys sat in silence for a minute, Otonashi preferring to let Naoi calm down his rapid breathing before he made any attempt at comfort.
It took half an hour for the rain to stall. When it eventually did, it found Naoi's head lying tentatively on Otonashi's shoulder, Otonashi's jacket warmheartedly draped around the green-haired boy's shoulders.
Naoi shivered as the rain quieted to a constant drizzle, and Otonashi impulsively laid his hand on top of his companion's.
"Don't worry," the redhead whispered, speaking for the first time since they entered the closet. "It'll be over soon." Naoi nodded tightly, his golden eyes meeting Otonashi's, currently bleached silver by the darkness.
Naoi turned his hand over to grasp Otonashi's, and the redhead started in surprise before relaxing into the hold and smiling gently at the other boy. Despite Naoi's shudders, his hand was soft and warm, and small enough to fit perfectly into Otonashi's. The redhead felt something flutter in his chest, and his fingers tightened around Naoi's.
"Do you think there's something else out there?" Naoi murmured. Otonashi jerked out of his thoughts at Naoi's unexpected words.
"What?"
"You know," Naoi persisted. "Gods, angels, fate. Do you think there's anything else besides us?" Otonashi was quiet for a second.
"I don't know," he answered truthfully. Naoi sighed.
"Neither do I." The boys sat in silence for another minute in the darkness, pressed close together.
"It's funny," Naoi continued. "In all my time here in the afterlife, never once have I gotten any closer to knowing what's out there. And that's what scares me." Otonashi listened carefully, and when Naoi paused, the redhead squeezed his hand lightly to urge him to continue. Naoi looked down at their entwined hands and exhaled, closing his eyes and leaning his head back.
"When I came to the afterlife, I thought that some benevolent god must've given me a second chance to do something worthwhile with my life. I was determined to make the most of it. In the beginning, I was good: I studied hard, I followed the rules. But I couldn't move on.
"My faith wavered. I didn't know what to do. I guess I...stopped being as good. I hurt people. If there was no God here, then I could live under my own authority. The world seemed so small, and I was the focal point of a universe of my own making. I wasn't as terrible as you found me, but I was far from innocent. Then it rained." Naoi shuddered, and Otonashi looked on with sympathetic eyes.
"It was my first thunderstorm in the afterlife, and it felt like my make-believe wonderland was splintering into a million glittering pieces. I felt so small in the face of the world, and so small in the face of what could be out there. I was scared. I had done some awful things, and if there was the slightest chance of any kind of divine retribution, it wouldn't fall in my favor.
"My fear made me lash out. I was trapped in a vicious cycle; every time it stopped raining, I went back to normal, but suddenly I became cruel and sadistic every time I caught the first glimpse of thunderclouds. Subconsciously, I was aware of the death spiral I plunged into, but I wasn't able to stop myself." A shadow passed over Naoi's eyes, then cleared as he raised his head to look at Otonashi.
"And then I found you," Naoi smiled slightly. "It was one of the worst thunderstorms I had experienced here. The rain was cold and fell like a volley of needles. I snapped and hurt people, worse than I had hurt people before. Then I met you, and you made all of it irrelevant.
"It didn't matter that I was scared. It didn't matter that there was blood staining my uniform, coating my shoes and spraying my clothes. It didn't matter that I didn't know if God existed, because when you came, I could finally have faith in something else."
Naoi's face was coming dangerously close to Otonashi's, his golden eyes glimmering with something a little more than happiness, but Otonashi found that he didn't mind so much at all. Otonashi tilted his head to meet Naoi's, and he could soon feel the other boy's warm breath on his lips. Otonashi felt his heart thump out a heady, irregular rhythm when Naoi's eyes slowly fluttered shut as the boy advanced even closer.
Then a faint rumble of thunder rolled across the sky.
Naoi's eyes snapped open and he buried his face into Otonashi's shoulder. Otonashi took another second to recover from the shock before setting his jaw. He disentangled Naoi from his shirt and held the boy at arm's length, his eyes forcibly meeting Naoi's.
"You're going to be okay," Otonashi practically growled in determination. "Trust me."
Otonashi only caught a glimpse of frightened golden eyes before Naoi's lips finally crashed into his own.
The world seemed to stop, and all Otonashi could process was the warm weight of Naoi's body pressed flush against his, Naoi's soft hair ghosting across his forehead, and most memorably, Naoi's slightly chapped lips moving desperately against his own as the boy pressed himself, all of himself-his vulnerabilities, his insecurities, the entirety of his spirit-onto Otonashi's astonished lips.
When Naoi pulled away, apologizing hysterically, Otonashi simply silenced him with a euphoric smile and another kiss, this one gentler and more lingering than their last. This kiss didn't taste exclusively sweet or bitter, but rather a mixture of the two in a patchwork of pure, clean togetherness.
When the kiss was over, Otonashi wasn't aware that the rain was finally beginning to fade. He wasn't able to describe what the kiss felt like. He wasn't able to talk about what kind of a connection bound the two of them together in that moment. All he was able to remember was that although he knew their time in the afterlife was limited, he felt like Naoi had just taken him by the hand and led him into eternity.
