Answers
Disclaimer: CBS owns Criminal Minds, you know that right?
Summary: After Hotch dumps Beth to be with Emily, he finds out the hard way that she won't take that lightly...
A/N: Well I can't really feel guilty for disliking Beth, because I'm a H/E shipper, so here's another anti-Beth humor fic, enjoy.
Thanks for reading, don't forget to leave a review.
"The greatest oak was once a little nut who held it's ground." Author Unknown
"So, are any of you going to tell me what happened?" the police officer asked looking at the three people before him.
Hotch sat on the couch between Emily and Beth, holding an ice pack on his eye while Emily was touching her split lip and Beth was holding a tissue to her nose.
Both women were wearing matching bruises, hair messy and torn and tattered clothing was ripped in different places.
"Well?" the officer asked again, sighing at the three difficult people before him.
"I'll go first" Beth announced, "There I was sitting outside on my boyfriend's car..."
"Ex boyfriend" Emily interrupted grinning at the other brunette who looked angrily at her.
"Ok" the officer said looking up from his note pad pointing to Beth, "You were dating him?"
"Right" Beth said pulling back the tissue, "And we were going good for nearly a month until..."
"And you're now dating her?" the officer asked Hotch, indicating to Emily.
"Correct" Hotch said looking over at Emily who was smiling at him.
"And you work for him at the Bureau?" the officer asked.
"Yep," Emily said grinning, "For five years."
"What are you grinning at?" Beth asked, her pleasant and kind affectionate demeanor changing.
"You" Emily told her, "I'm really happy Beth, and it's all because of you."
"What?" Beth asked, reaching over Hotch to attack Emily.
"Calm down" Hotch instructed while he and the officer, struggled with the brunette.
"Everyone sit down and shut up" the officer asked, he felt like he was talking in circles, "Now I want answers and I want them now."
"Well, you saw how angry she got at me?" she asked, leaning back on the couch, "Imagine that times three. Now here's what really happened..."
Hotch was tickling her stomach, "That's right, you're a regular people pleaser aren't you?"
Emily laughed, "Stop, stop. Ok."
Hotch grinned as she bit her lower lip to stop laughing against his tickled assault, "All right, we better get ready to go pick up Jack from Jessica's."
Emily sighed in relief, at hearing the word 'we'. She knew how hard it was for him to let his little boy around people, especially ones that he's dating.
She briefly wondered if that was one of the reasons he had dumped Beth for her, did he not trust the other brunette?
"Emily?" Hotch called out, "Are you all right?"
"Hmm?" Emily said, "Oh, yeah. I'm fine. You ready?"
"Ready." Hotch told her setting the alarm on his new home, as the two walked out the front door.
Emily paused then stopped when she stared at the car in the drive way. This can't be good.
"Crap" Emily muttered looking over at Hotch, "What do you think she wants?"
"God only knows" Hotch muttered, pulling Emily slightly behind him, "Beth, what are you doing here?"
"You know what I'm doing here, Aaron" Beth muttered, leaning against the passenger side of Hotch's car door "I'm here for her."
"Oh, you want to give it ago again?" Emily asked trying to sidestepped Hotch, "Because I'm always ready to kick your ass."
"Really?" Beth asked leaning off of her car, "I remember you eating dirt before Aaron and his merry band of idiots pulled me off of you."
Emily narrowed her eyes, while Hotch kept a firm grasp on her when she moved forward.
It was one thing to insult her, she could take it. But it was damn near suicide to insult the team, her friends.
"Oh ho, you're so gonna look funny in your Christmas cards missing your teeth." Emily said shoving herself free of Hotch's tight grip and charging at the smirking brunette.
"So let me get this straight?" the officer asked looking from Emily to Beth, "You made the first move?"
"Yes" Emily admitted. She didn't care if she was hauled off for taking the first swing, she got Beth good and that was all that mattered to her.
"And you thought it was wise to retaliate by jumping on her and slugging her in the head?" the officer questioned to Beth.
"Well I wasn't exactly thinking clearly" Beth admitted, "I was a little pissed off."
"Ha, you were drunk" Emily said wincing, the movement causing her to feel pain shoot through her lip, "She brings Dean Martin to shame."
"That's a lie" Beth shouted, "You're just jealous because Aaron still loves me."
"He doesn't love you." Emily told her, "Hasn't that gotten through that thick skull of yours? Why don't you just leave already?"
"I don't need to hear this shit from you" Beth said moving to stand up.
"Sit down" the officer said, "God I really don't need this shit. Now lets get this over with. You" the officer said to Beth, "You, were dumped by Agent Hotchner. Right?"
"Right" Beth said folding her arms across her chest, "But she started this."
"No I didn't." Emily said, "Hotch dumped you, you need to get over it."
"Both of you, calm down." Hotch said, raising his head to look at the two brunettes.
Beth turned to look at him, "No, I won't calm down. My nose is probably broken because of your stupid Special Agent Prentiss over there."
"Uh, excuse me?" Emily said turning on the couch to face the other brunette, "But..."
"Beth?" Hotch said, turning his attention to his ex, "I'm sorry, but I'm not in love with you anymore..."
Beth brought the pillow on her lap up to her face, screeching in it, "Why? What did I do wrong?"
Emily rolled her eyes, while the officer winced at the shrieking.
"Why?" Beth grumbled loudly, "When you dumped me I was so angry at you, I had to drive straight here."
"How long ago did you leave this one for her?" the officer asked.
"Two weeks ago." Hotch said, looking over at Emily.
Emily noticed that Beth was, sniffling so she brought the tissue box over to her and the angry brunette grabbed it out of her hand fast.
"Thanks" Beth mumbled, wincing as she brought the tissue over her harmed nose, "What?"
"Calm down" Hotch told her, patting her arm.
"Aaron, are you telling me there's no chance for a reconciliation?" Beth asked him.
Emily leaned over, "No there's not."
"I wasn't asking you. I was asking Aaron." Beth told her.
Beth and Emily look over at Hotch, "Come on, Aaron. Just tell her."
"Um" Hotch said, looking over at Beth, "Beth... I'm really grateful for all that you've done for me..."
Beth's face fell, picking up another tissue she held it to her nose, "Aaron, no."
"Beth, I'm really sorry" Hotch said, "But it's always been Emily."
"You don't love her, Aaron" Beth told him, "You love me, you told me..."
Emily looked over at Hotch, shaking her head, "Beth, this isn't exactly the right time to have this conversation in front of a stranger..."
"Oh don't mind me" the officer said, "This better then Judge Judy."
Emily rolled her eyes, while Beth said, "Maybe you don't get it, but I'm not going to give up until he tells me that it's over."
"He already did, when he dumped you" Emily reminded her.
Beth growled as she lunged across Hotch to grab at Emily, causing both brunettes to fall off the couch. Hotch reached for Emily, pulling at her while the police officer grabbed for Beth.
The next thing Hotch knew he could hear the officer cry out, causing the Federal agents to look up to see the police officer rubbing at his eye.
"Beth!" Hotch's loud tone permeated through the living room "That's it" he moved back to the couch sitting down, "I told you that I was grateful for all that you've done for me, but this is it. I don't love you and I'm not going back to you."
Beth sat there on the living room floor in shock, "You're not taking me back?"
"No" Hotch told her again, "I love Emily."
Beth took a deep breath, "Fine. But you should know I love you, you idiot."
Hotch noticed the police officer shake his head, "All right, I understand that, but its not going to change anything."
"That's all your going to say to me, is you understand?" Beth repeated, "Aaron, I could of dated anyone, anyone. That guy from my gym or Barry from the museum but I chose you."
"More like stalked him" Emily muttered.
Beth shot the brunette a look, "You made me feel important and wanted, Aaron. I wanted to build a life with you and your son."
"Beth..." Hotch said again, "I've sorted out my feelings and I want Emily. You're a great woman and you'll find someone, just not me."
The officer rubbed his forehead, he was telling himself to not intervene but this woman on the floor was giving him a headache, "Listen, I know it's not my place to get involved in personal matters..."
"Then don't" Beth barked out as she started to stand up.
"But listen, Beth..." the police officer told her, "If Agent Hotchner truly loves you, he would of come to see that by now and I'm sure that Agent Prentiss would of done the right thing and stepped aside right?"
"Sure, why not" Emily said as Hotch rubbed her arm.
"But you need to stop this" the officer told her, "You trespassed on private property, physically assaulting law enforcement officers. You'll be lucky if they decide not to press charges. Are you going to press charges?"
Emily looked over at Hotch who looked back, "No. We just want to be left alone."
"Can you live with that?" the officer asked Beth.
"Oh I'm sorry," Beth muttered sarcastically, "Am I allowed to talk now?"
"Miss" the officer told her, as she stood up, "If you'd like to avoid being arrested, I suggest you start to vacate the premises so no one has to be arrested."
"Look, I don't care if I sound like a bitch" Beth told the officer as she turned to Hotch, "But this really, really sucks."
"Officer?" Emily asked, "Is this kind of thing normal?"
"Hardly anything about this situation is normal" the officer told them, "But I'm sure lots of exes go nuts on the new girlfriends."
"I meant about the avoiding being arrested thing" Emily said, "But thanks, I think."
The officer placed a hand on Beth's shoulder, "Come along, miss."
Emily rubbed her lip, "This is going to leave a mark."
Hotch picked up his ice pack, placing it on her lip and kissing her forehead when she winced at the impact, "Sorry."
"Hey, it's not your fault." Emily said pulling the ice pack away, kissing Hotch.
As Beth and the officer walked out the front door, she turned around and saw Hotch pull Emily into an embrace and wondered if she was just the speed bump in the relationship that led him to Emily.
"Come on, Beth. It's time to go." the officer told the brunette, a wave of sympathy for the distraught woman, but even he could see that the two agents were meant to be, "Lets get you a cup of coffee, ok?"
"Ok" Beth told him, following him to her car.
Albert Einstein said, "It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer."
THE END
Well I hope you all liked it, I do hope you leave a review.