The first chapter of this story has a lot of vocabulary and scenes from the episode FAT. It wont carry on like this I just needed to, to get the story started.

Chapter 1

Olivia stood outside Cragen's office door she couldn't believe she was going to do this but she didn't feel she had a choice. She knocked on the door and entered. Cragen looked up from his desk

"Olivia… what's up?"

She looked at him, say something else she thought to herself anything but what you're going to. She took a deep breath "I wanna new partner" she told him. As the words left her mouth she felt a pain in her chest she couldn't believe she had just it, Cragen just looked at her.

"You want to split with Elliot?"

"Yeah" she said her voice breaking "I… I don't ….. No I can't …..We…." the tears she didn't want to fall ran down her face "I fuckin hate him right now" she cried wiping the tears away. Cragen put the papers down he was holding and walked round the desk towards her.

"What did he do Olivia? ….. He hasn't hurt you has he?" asked Cragen praying the answer was No. He knew Elliot had a temper but never thought he would use it against Olivia.

"No … god no I swear he hasn't touched me" she said shocked Cragen had even asked.

"So what's happened? Why do you need a new partner now? I know you guys have been arguing a bit lately but….. Well all partners go through a tough stage… it's like a marriage" he said smiling at her, but he noticed she didn't smile back.

"Yeah well I want a divorce" she snapped. Cragen sighed and sat on the edge of the desk.

"Tell me why first Olivia cause I aint breaking up a good partnership because of some stupid argument. What the hell has happened?"

Olivia looked at Cragen and took a deep breath "We need a break from each other, that's all. Eight years together nearly every day… he is hard work at the best of times…. I just need a bit of time away from him"

Cragen looked back at her "Olivia, has something happened between the two of you?"

"What! No! Nothing has happened. I just need a break from him…..please don't ask me why… It's complicated"

"Look you both have a long weekend off after the case, I will look into it but I can't promise anything"

"Okay … thanks Captain. Just one more thing…. If Elliot asks why we have been split up…."

"I won't tell him you came to me"

"Thank you" she said turning to leave just as she was about to turn the handle he spoke again.

"However Olivia … if there is something you're not telling me you need to sort it out one way or the other, you can't run from things for ever and you can't avoid Elliot"

She opened the door and left.

Elliot woke up and looked at the clock it had just turned midday, he sighed and pulled himself up from the couch. He looked at the photos of his kids on the table, god he missed them so much. He had hardly seen them since him and Kathy had split. He stood up and kicked the empty bottle of whisky on the floor he had drunk the day before. He had tried to call Olivia over the weekend to apologise for the way he had talked to her in the hospital and the things he had said leading up to that. He knew he had been a prick to her; he was getting quite good at that, pushing people away that he cared about. When she had refused to take his calls he had done the next best thing and got drunk. He rubbed his face and stood up swaying a little, Christ he felt like shit. He staggered to the bathroom and ran the shower; he needed to sort himself out before work.

Once showered and dressed he climbed in the car and headed for the precinct, he decided to stop off and get Olivia her favourite doughnut and coffee in a small attempt to apologise to her. As he drove past his church he stopped and climbed out the car. He hadn't been to church for a while and it had been years since he last went to confession, and he had a lot to confess to.

He sat in the confessional "Forgive me father for I have sinned, it has been two years since my last confession….. These are my sins…. I was selfish,(I blamed Olivia for that boy dying) I was disrespectful,( I put her down in front of her colleague's and shouted at her) I lost my temper(I shouted at her blamed her for everything)…Erm… for these and all of my sins I am truly sorry"

"After two years that's it?"

No, he thought to himself but how do I confess I think about my partner in ways I shouldn't.

"Why don't you tell me what's really bothering you Elliot?"

Elliot thought hard "It's like I keep losing people" he said, I keep pushing her away when all I want to do is hold her close.

"Like you family"

"My family" he said "My kids…my friends" his thoughts went back to Olivia, not to his wife.

"You said friends….. You mean someone at work" asked the priest. He knew from Kathy's confessions she was worried about Elliot and his feelings for Olivia, but he couldn't ask him outright.

Pictures of Olivia upset at the hospital went through Elliot's mind as he pushed her away by what he had said to her "We can't be partners anymore". His thoughts were interrupted by his pager beeping.

"I'm sorry father I have to go" he said stopping the beeping.

"Okay….. But you should come back" he knew Elliot had to leave because of work but he also knew he had to talk to him some more about how he was feeling. He knew he and Kathy had split up and were going through a divorce, he knew it was his job to try and help them…. If he could.

"Et ego te absolovo a peccatis tuis in nomine Patris, et filli, et Spiritus Sancti"

"Amen" said Elliot making the sign of the cross and going to leave the confessional.

"Elliot… for your penance call your wife" Elliot just sat for a few seconds before leaving. It wasn't his wife he needed to talk to. He rang Cragen to find out where he was heading.

"Okay" he said after finishing the conversation "I will pick up Liv on the way"

"Don't bother" said Cragen "The guy you're working this case with will meet you there"

"What the hell you on about ….Where's Liv?" he asked. "Has something happened to her…. is she sick" he asked starting to get worried.

"Just get to the crime scene and work the case….. Olivia is fine"

"So why the hell is she not working this" he pushed.

"Just do as I tell you" snapped Cragen hanging the phone up on him.

Elliot snapped his phone shut and got in the car, something was wrong he could tell. He drove to the crime scene a million things going through his mind. His kids that he hadn't seen for weeks, Olivia's face when Gitano had the gun to his head, Olivia when she was lay holding her neck and he thought she was seriously hurt or going to die, Olivia when he told her they couldn't be partners. Fuck what he had done, he tells her that then two days later he is told to work a case with someone else. He pulled the car over and called Olivia her phone went straight to answer "Damn it Liv answer your Damn phone" he said before hanging up. He pulled up to the crime scene and got out the car, slowly he walked towards the yellow tape, he really didn't want to be there he just wanted to find Liv and talk to her.

"Stabler… you weren't at the house; I thought you clocked out early"

Clocked out early you stupid prick, when I hadn't even been there he thought, he just glared at him as he carried on talking, taking an instant dislike to him.

"Luscious Blaine….. Queens SVU… you and I are going to be partners" Elliot just glared at him as he felt like he had been kicked in the gut. I already have a partner he wanted to scream but just stood and looked as he walked away and worked the scene. Elliot couldn't believe what he had just heard; he needed to talk to Liv or Cragen what the hell was going on.

Elliot worked the scene with him and then at the hospital. All he cared about was getting back to the precinct and getting some answers. He didn't like what he heard when he finally got the chance to speak to Cragen. He was told she had gone to computer crimes, when he asked why all he was told was they needed a break, sometime apart. He knew there and then Olivia had asked to go; she needed to get away from him. He knew what he had said and how he had acted had lost him his partner and best friend, and he didn't know how to get her back. How was he supposed to tell her he needed her, that she held him together when he needed someone, when he told her "You and this job are about the only things I've got anymore….. I don't wanna wreck that….. I couldn't take it." What he really meant was she was all he had, he needed her, he loved her and if he lost her he couldn't handle it. Why the hell couldn't he just tell her, why was it so hard for him to tell the woman he cared about and loved how he felt. He looked out of Cragen's office to her empty desk. He had totally fucked up and he didn't know what he could do to fix it.

He worked the case with Blaine finally bringing in two kids for questioning; Blaine took control of the interview. Elliot stood back and watched him work god he was a prick the way he spoke to the kid trying to get information out of her, the final straw came when he lied to her, suspect or not she was a kid and he wasn't going to stand back and just let him lie. He asked him to see him outside, Blaine stood up and followed him out the door seriously pissed at been ordered out the room.

"What seems to be your problem?" he asked Elliot.

"You… questioning a minor with a parent present"

"Give me a break" he said to Elliot as Elliot started to walk away.

"Even if you get something in there we can't use it"

"But we can use it to break the brother" he said following Elliot "they did it man … they brutalised that girl"

"Right" said Elliot stopping and turning to face him. "And when the defence finds out how you got that confession then what?"

"How they gonna find out huh…cause you're gonna back me up, the word of two detectives against a kid"

Elliot just looked at him "there's no way I'm doin that" he said going to walk away.

"Don't give me that holier than now crap" said Blaine looking Elliot up and down "I know how you work"

"You know nothing about me" said Elliot turning away before he punched the arrogant prick.

"No wonder your partner dumped you" Elliot stopped walking and turned around the anger building inside him.

"What did you just say to me?" he asked walking towards Blaine his hand already balling up into a fist.

"You screwed her now you're trying to screw me" That was it Elliot seen red and lashed out his fist connecting with Blaine's face. Blaine grabbed hold of him as they both wrestled Elliot felt his shirt getting ripped. Next thing he knew there were other hands on pulling him and Blaine apart.

Once apart Elliot tried to calm down glaring over at Blaine who was being held back by Cragen. "Blaine my office now" he yelled "Everyone back to work, funs over" he said to everyone else who had gathered round to watch. "What have you got to say Elliot?" he asked him walking up to Elliot.

"Either you get rid of him or I quit" he demanded there was no way he was going to work with the guy.

"You get changed and get in my office" said Cragen. He knew Elliot's outburst had more to do with Olivia's transfer than how much he hated Blaine. He knew Elliot had a temper but in the 10 years he had known him he couldn't recall him ever lashing out at another detective in the precinct.

Elliot walked into the locker room and punched his locker, before dropping his head forward and leaning against it and taking a deep breath. His whole body was shaking with the adrenalin. He sat down on the bench behind him and dropped his head into his hands, he couldn't do this, he was losing everyone who meant anything to him and pushing everyone else away. "Fuck!" he said out loud. He thought of Olivia and of what had happened over the last couple of weeks, why couldn't he just of told her the truth, told her how he was feeling then none of this would be happening, she wouldn't have left him, he told her he couldn't take it if they weren't partners …. Why didn't she believe him, he needed her….. wanted her. he shook his head and stood up opening his locker he started to take off his ripped shirt, grabbing a clean one out and pulling it on. he sensed someone behind him and turned around. Olivia was stood leaning against the door frame a slight smile on her face, god she looked beautiful. He stood at first just staring not knowing what to say.

"I liked that shirt" she said, Elliot just looked at he as he started to do up the buttons. She leaves me without a word and the first thing she says is she liked my shirt, like nothing has happened. in his heart he wanted to go to her hold her beg her to come back, but his male pride and the fact he was still seriously pissed off stopped him.

"What are you doin here?" he asked her, as he began to button up his shirt.

"I heard what happened between you and Blaine "she said resting against the door frame. She tried to stare at him as he done up his shirt, she had seen with his top off a number of times. She had often dreamt about running her hands over him, holding him tight to her.

"What can I tell you, he's a prick?" He thought back to what Blaine had said to set him off You screwed your partner; he had seen red as he heard the words. He looked at Olivia and walked towards her, as he finished buttoning up his shirt.

"What didn't you tell me?" he asked her, standing in front of her not much distance between them. He needed to know why she just left without telling him, how she could just throw away what they had. Seven years they had been partners…. They were more than partners, they needed each other…he needed her.

Olivia heard the question and couldn't look at him. she knew he would guess it was her that asked for the move, she knew when she came here to see him he would confront her. she glance up at him and saw him staring at her, there was something different about the way he looked at her.

"Elliot we've been partners for 7 years longer than anyone else here we needed a change." She couldn't even look at him as she told him. She kept her eyes away from his. She couldn't tell him the truth.

"I'm sorry I should have told you… it's just…. it's just too complicated." She looked up and saw his face inches from hers. He stared down at her without a word as he finished fastening up his buttons.

"Thanks for dropping by" he said pushing past her and into the corridor. She turned to watch him leave, but he stopped suddenly and turned to face her.

"Complicated?" he said to her. She just stood and looked at him. "You break up our partnership after all this time, and the excuse I get is…It's complicated." He walked back towards her. "No Liv… this right now isn't complicated, whatever is happening or what did happen that got you to leave wasn't complicated." He said starting to raise his voice.

"El ….please, just calm down?" she asked him as he came back towards her with a lok on his face she had never seen before.

"You want complicated?" he asked standing in front of her. "I will give you complicated."

He quickly moved his hand behind her neck and pulled her towards him as he bent forward and his lips crashed against hers, kissing her hard. He felt her resist at first, and then she parted her lips and kissed him back, as his tongue explored her mouth. She felt herself relax against him, she didn't care they were in the doorway of the locker room all she knew was Elliot's mouth was against hers and it felt so right. He pulled back panting and looked at her, his eyes moving from her lips to her eyes as he tried to catch his.

"Now….Its fucking complicated" he said turning around and leaving her standing in the doorway.

So what do you think. This is going to be a E/O story only no cases, just their feelings.