Pidge was used to being invisible.
She was the girl that always excelled at everything she tried, unless it had to do with people. Its not that other people didn't try to include her, she just never put herself out there. And over time, everyone just gave up.
She was smart, and she knew it. Her confidence in her abilities and her inbred cocky attitude had taken her through most of her life. She had no need for people because 'people' weren't as reliable as 'her'.
When she became a member of Voltron…it damaged the perfect barrier she'd built around herself. She resented the fact that in order to find her family, she had to be part of a 'team'. She could do just fine on her own, thank you.
Yet little by little, she found herself genuinely interacting with those in the team. Hunk was brilliant in his own way if not a little silly. She found it easier to open up to him first.
As for Lance and Keith, well, they were a problem to solve little by little.
Then there was Shiro.
Every time he entered her thoughts she scowled. He was easy to talk to, like hunk, but was about as intelligent as Lance and Keith. With made conversation difficult. He was a good leader, then again, she had no idea what a good or bad leader was. But seeing the others follow him without question seemed like enough evidence to rely on him.
But that wasn't why he made her scowl.
He made her scowl because he was inside her head when he shouldn't be.
He would just pop up at the oddest times, day and night, no warning, no nothing. Just 'pop' and he's there.
It was distracting and infuriating. Especially today when she had so much she needed to get done.
Finally giving up, she pushed her chair back. Yawning, she made her way to her room which was further down from the boys rooms. Same hall, but she felt more comfortable with a bit of distance.
"Pidge?"
Pidge sucked in her breath as she spun around. Shiro was standing half in and half out of his door. He looked like he just woke up.
"What are you doing still up at this hour?"
"I was formatting a program," Pidge said and felt the heat rise in her face, "I lost track of time."
"That's not good," Shiro shook his head, "you need your sleep, you could get sick if you don't."
"I'm fine," She waved off his concern, "I've done this loads of times back home. I'll plow through this, get it all done, and then I'll sleep like a rock. Easy-peasy."
Did she seriously just say 'easy-peasy'? Was she five?!
But shiro smiled, probably because he thought she was five. And that though did not make Pidge happy at all.
"Just remember to take care, that's all," he said, "take your time. The program doesn't have to be done for a few weeks."
Yeah, but the sooner they had it, the better.
()
One week later Pidge cursed Shiro inside and out. She felt awful. Why did he have to say she'd get sick? It was like he spoke it into existence!
Still, she was almost done.
A few more lines of data and-
The screen burred in front of her and she lowered her head onto the table in front of her. She'd just close her eyes for a minute…
()
"Pidge!"
She tried to sit up and open her eyes, but when she did vertigo took over and she gagged. Strong arms held her an she felt something placed in her lap. Unable to hold back she retched and coughed. Every time she was able to get a breath in it was only to fuel more heaves.
When she was done she blinked tears out of her eyes. Someone had removed her glasses and she looked up at the one that was practically holding her.
"I told you that you would get sick if you pushed yourself," Shiro chided.
Pidge never wanted to die before now. What was the quickest way to just disappear?
On her lap was a bucket Hunk used for bolts, which said bolts were scattered all over the floor. Shiro had dumped them in a hurry to make sure she wasn't sick all over herself.
Crows…I really am five years old…
"Can you stand?"
She didn't want to stand. She didn't want to move. She hurt everywhere. Breathing was painful. But she had always been able to do everything herself, so she pushed his hand away and tried to stand.
All she managed to do was slide off the chair.
Shiro caught her and in one powerful motion, picked her up in the carrying position. She wanted to protest.
But she didn't.
She wanted to kick and complain and tell him that this was all his fault and that she was perfectly capable to pulling her own weight!
But she didn't.
Instead she rested her head on his shoulder as he carried her back to her room. When the door opened, she wanted to die again.
The room was a mess.
How could she be like this?! Was she such a child that she couldn't keep her room in some semblance of order?! Even LANCE was more organized that she was!
Shiro either stepped over or pushed aside the obstacles in his way. Not once did he say anything or give any indication that he was disgusted. She knew this, because she watched his face for any sign of judgement.
He set her down on her bed, leaned over to pick up last night pajamas and then left the room without saying anything.
She got changed slowly, moving too fast made her feel like throwing up again. When she was done, she laid down and pulled the covers over her head. Maybe, if she was lucky, the blankets would suffocate her over night.
There was a knock on the door and it opened when she answered.
Shiro stepped back in and smiled at the fact that she was lying down. She sat back up, half in defiance, and half because she felt uncomfortable lying down with someone else standing nearby. He made a place by the bed and sat on the floor.
"Here," he said handing her a cup of tea. Or what passed for tea in the middle of space. Hunk had found a mixture that tasted like mint-coffee. It was horrific at first, but it was an acquired taste and they all had acquired it.
She sipped it and let the mint cool her stomach and remove the taste of bile from her mouth. She didn't say anything, not 'thank you' or even, 'why are you still here'.
"Sleep in tomorrow," Shiro said when she was done with the drink. He took the cup and made to leave, but stopped.
Pidge had hold of his sleeve.
She didn't remember grabbing it. But even though she told her hand to let go, she found she really didn't want to. She found she didn't care anymore how she looked or what Shiro thought of her…ok, she did…a little, but she was sick, right? Didn't that mean she got to be a little selfish?
"Do you need a bucket again?" He asked, still no judgement in his face or tone.
She shook her head. Maybe it was the fever, maybe it was sleep-depravation induced 'loose-tongue syndrom', but she told him her selfish want.
"stay…"
He felt her head and she leaned into it. She loved how big his hands where. She loved that he could keep up with ramblings even if he wasn't intelligent enough to understand most of it. She loved how he let her do what she wanted, but was always there when she slipped up.
She was weak right now, and that scared her. For someone whose only ally was herself, not being able to support herself was…terrifying.
"I don't…like being sick…" She muttered and glared at him, "you spoke it into existence."
Ha laughed.
The nerve.
"Right, right," he said, "I'll stay and take responsibility."
She nodded and laid back down. He made to tuck her in, but she pushed him back.
She may have been sick, but she could at least tuck her own self in, thank you very much.
She closed her eyes and waited for sleep to come. She knew Shiro was close, and that gave her comfort, even if the thought of him in her trash heap of a room gave her anxiety. She really wondered what he was thinking. He was kind to everyone, but he had seen through her before anyone else.
Even though she'd spent her whole life blending in where ever she chose, he had been able to pick her out.
Her eyes snapped open.
Was he humming?!
Shiros back was to her, leaning against the bed frame. He sat cross legged and seemed content as he hummed seemingly to himself.
She closed her eyes again and tried not to laugh. If she did, he would stop, and she couldn't have that. Instead she listened and let a smile rest on her face as she fell asleep.
()
Shiro couldn't believe he'd been right.
He had only wanted Pidge to go to bed earlier, he didn't think she'd actually get really sick!
Matt had always bragged about how stubborn his sister was and how she rarely got sick. When shiro had met the family a few weeks before the launch, he remembered thinking that Katie was a very scary child. Her eyes were hard and her stance firm and solid. She was like a rock.
When he saw her again as a paladin, he wanted to kick himself for not noticing earlier. It was plenty clear that she and Matt were siblings simply by looks alone.
Still, she remained as unmoved as the rock he'd first though of her as.
Then when he'd called her katie, just to let her know that he knew, she had cried.
Cried!
Shiro didn't know what to do when people leaked.
But it had been a new side he'd never seen or thought existed. Her stony persona was gone in a flash as she cried over the family she'd lost.
She had been so small. Shiro had been taken aback by just HOW small and soft she was. Very much unlike the impression she gave off.
Seeing her sick gave him the same shock as seeing her cry.
It just wasn't what he was used to.
He was determined to get her better so she could be the normal Pidge again. She didn't look like a rock anymore, she'd softened quite a bit after becoming a paladin, but he still hated to see her like this.
He left the room so she could change and went to make the mint-coffee that they all somehow got used to.
Shiro knocked before entering the room. He was sure she'd had enough time to change, but he'd wanted to make sure. When he saw her lying down he smiled and felt relieved that she was taking this seriously.
He kicked stuff out of his way and handed her the cup. She took it and sipped it, almost robotically. He watched her to make sure she didn't spill it or that she didn't take anything bigger than a sip.
When she was finished he took the cup and figured he'd let her get to sleep, but when he tried to stand he felt a tug on his arm.
Pidge had hold of her sleeve and she was scowling at her hand holding it. He paused and waited to hear what it was she wanted. When her scowl deepened he tried to guess.
"Do you need the bucket again?"
She shook her head and muttered, "stay."
A little shocked, he sat back down. She seemed to sway a little. Thinking he should've done this a while ago, he felt her forehead. It was hot and moist with fever sweat.
She put her heads weight into his hand and Shiro was forcibly reminded of a cat asking for its head to be scratched. He smiled again and lowered his hand to reveal the stink eye she was aiming at him.
"I don't…like being sick," her voice wavered slightly, "you spoke it into existence."
Shiro couldn't help it. He laughed. She almost looked betrayed with how she was glaring at him! He relented.
"Right, right," he said resisting the urge to reach up and touch her head again, "I'll stay and take responsibility.
Her head bobbed in a way that he supposed was a nod and she laid back down, pulling the cover up.
Out of some odd instinct he reached over to tuck her in. Only when she brushed him off did he realize how forward that was. Blushing he sat back down on the floor, turning his back to her so she could go to sleep.
It was only then that he really took a look at her room. He almost laughed again. He'd been so worried that he'd actually missed this pile in incoherent odds and ends!
There was a reason he didn't let anyone in his room back at the garrison.
Home sweet home, he thought and shook his head.
Hours passed and Shiro suddenly realized that he was humming. He had no idea when he'd started!
Turning to see if he'd bothered her, he saw that she was breathing evenly, deep asleep, with a small smile still on her face.
((((((FIN))))))