Written by Dafydd for Alfonso
Disclaimer: I do not own House or anything else you might recognise from TV.
This story takes place shortly after Vogler leaves.
Dr Gregory House sat at his kitchen table. He did not often sit at this table anymore, he was to busy solving intriguing medical cases in each and every episode of popular American drama House, viewed by an estimated 18 million viewers. Today was different however as fed up with his unique take on life, Dr Cuddy had fired him. And so House had come up with a plan, Kill Cuddy.
Although he knew Cuddy would not take kindly to being murdered he had still decided that it was, as Vulcans would say, the logical course of action. Being a doctor House knew a great deal about creating wormholes as most doctors obviously do. His plan therefore was to create a wormhole in Cuddy's office; she would be sucked into and hopefully destroyed.
However House had not accounted for one thing; nobody had actually been through a wormhole, and therefore he did not know if it would really kill her. Thus House was unsure as to what to do about this. He went to old friend and sidekick Wilson. For several days they discussed what to do about Cuddy until in a brilliant flash of inspiration House knew what to do.
The next day House awoke to find somebody had stolen his cane. He thought, by goodness this is a real pickle. How on earth was he to dispose of Cuddy when he was no longer able to walk? He quickly decided on a solution. He got out the chainsaw he kept under his pillow for safety reasons and quickly chopped his bed into numerous bits of wood. He then, using his DS, SP and portable TV, as well as the bits of wood, assembled a large robotic spider.
As well as putting his plan back into action he had invented a new form of transport, he could make millions with this invention later. And so travelling on his spider, with the chainsaw back under his pillow, he set off on his way to Cuddy's office.
Unfortunately his troubles were yet to end. Vogler, still bitter towards House pushed House of his Spider and then like the beast he was stomped off. House was not happy about this and decided to get him later. Well anyway he set off again but fell down a manhole. In this hole House realised he had hit his shoulder causing bloodstains to form on his clothes. House was growing ever more furious and again set of for Cuddy's office.
Finally he had reached the hospital, no one had yet commented on his robotic spider, which hurt him deeply, he made a note to himself to get everyone else later as well as Cuddy.
The end was near, Cuddy was near, Cuddy was in his sights when suddenly he stopped as there stood Cameron, Chase and Foreman. He immediately shot Chase for his previous treachery and told Foreman to go suck a lemon. Foreman, overcome with tears ran off. Only Cameron stood in the way of Cuddy's doom.
Quickly he had an inspiration as to solving all his problems, he went over to the dead Aussie grabbed his boomerang and threw it at Cuddy. It missed but boomerangs always come back so it hit Cuddy the second time round knocking her stone dead. Cameron seeing her hero in action quickly jumped onto the robotic spider which turned into a White Horse with House wearing shining armour. They rode off into the setting sun. What looked to be a terrible day had turned into pure gold