Ha ha! I've been bit by the rule bug and decided to unleash a tidal wave of new fanfiction rules! Mwhahaha! cower in fear! (oh, I don't own tfs or intend this for offense either) Enjoy! ^=^

#1 DO NOT BITE CYBERTRONIANS
Twirl had captured me
And took me to her motherboar—I mean ship
She showed her off to all her robot friends
But she held me WAY. TOO. TIGHT!
I tried telling her that, but would she listen?
Noooooooooo
So I tried to bite her finger to get the message across
MAJOR TOOTHACHE!

#2 YOU CAN'T SPIT ACID
Twirl dropped me
So I ran
RAN LIKE THERE WAS NO TOMMOROW!
I accidently bumped into another one of the those robots
They yelled, "AGH! IT'S ONE OF THOSE ORGANICS THAT SPIT ACID!"
To which I replied, "I can? Cool!"
I spat on the ground
My salvia was not acidic
I was majorly disappointed
That liar!

#3 USE YOUR SMALL SIZE TO YOUR ADVANTAGE
That lying robot pulled an alarm
Next thing I know, all these other Cybertronians are trying to catch me (without actually touching me)
I was only able to avoid them by using my small size
But I got cocky
And two robots caught me
Why, cruel fate, why?

#4 BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU SAY AROUND THE CYBERTRONIANS
Like I said before, two robots had caught me
One was orange, the other was blue
The blue one was holding me
I banged on his hands and yelled, "LET ME GO!"
He took me seriously
And dropped me from sixty feet
PAIN
Lots and lots of pain!
The orange was all like, "Uh-oh, brother. I think the organic being hurt."
I was all like, "You don't say?"
Then this big Cybertronian came by
The two robots called him "Ultra magnus sir"
Ultra magnus sir told them they were going to have to dispose of me
So I was all, "NO! NO! I WANT TO LIVE! I'M AN AMERICAN! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!"
The two robots begged that the could keep me
They promised they would watch me
Ultra magnus sir agreed
So they're my, like, gurdians?

What have I gotten myself into?!

#5 ULTRA MAGNUS' HAMMER IS NOT A TOY
I was REALLY bored
And Ultra magnus just "happened" to leave the Magnus hammer where I could get my hands on it
Well, it was on the table about 750,000 feet in the air but a small feat for a squierrel like me!
Once I had retrived it (and figured out how to carry it without it squishing me like a bug) I ran around the ship yelling, "It's hammer time!"
It was all good fun
...until Ultra magnus caught me
Needless to say, he was not happy
He said he'd let me off with a warning this time but next time I'd get thrown in the brig

What the heck is a brig?

#6 NO DOING SOMETHING STUPID JUST TO FIND OUT WHAT A BRIG IS
What?
Don't look at me like that!
I know you want to find out too!
You can't deny it!
Anyway...
I rigged a bucket of soy sauce to fall over the next guy who came through the ships' doors
I THOUGHT it would be my guardians (Jetfire and Jetstorm) since they were returning from a mission
They would, of course, laugh and take it good naturally but some other guy whould throw me in "the brig"
Unfortunately, it was NOT my guardians
It was this bot with a chin almost as big as his ego, named Sentinal Prime
As if he didn't ALREADY have enough to hate about organics
Sentinal chased me all around the ship, yelling somethings I'm pretty sure that would get me in trouble if I ever repeated them
UM (Ultra magnus) threw me in the brig
It was dark
It was also cold
I freaked out when something touched my hand
…and no one else was in there...

#7 YOU CAN NOT OUTRUN BLURR
It was Thundercracker's fault!
He dared me to do it!
What was I doing with a Decepticon, you ask?
Well, it's simple
He was a prisoner
And I got bored
So I talked to him
He got me SO mad, saying he was SO superior
It just...got to me, ya know?
Anyway, I boasted that I could outrun Blurr
It wasn't the BOASTING that was the problem
It was the LIVING UP TO that boasting
Blurr happily agreed to it
I think he enjoys watching me suffer
Needless to say, I lost
I think my legs stretched about a foot more
Halfway through the race, I fell down
I stayed there until Blurr won and ran circles around me
He kept doing that until he noticed I wasn't moving
Like, AT ALL
He experimently poked me
I still didn't move
Blurr had to rush me to Red alert
Dang, that mech is FAST

#8 THERE ARE SOMETHINGS YOU SHOULD JUST KEEP TO YOURSELF
While pondering the difficult questions of life (AKA doing my homework), I thought a very interesting thought
It had to do with my guardians so I told them
I asked, "Hey, since Wheeljack made you guys, doesn't that mean he's like your father?"
Unfortunately, Wheeljack was in there too
They didn't move
AT ALL
I went crying to Red alert that I had broken them
She fixed them and explained to me that they had glitched
Correction:
I had glitched them
Heh heh
Whoops?

#9 DON'T EVEN JOKE THAT YOU HAVE ANY ASSOCIATION WITH THE DECEPTICONS
The twins and I were chatting
Just hanging out
It was all cool until I joked that the Decepticons were my parents (which they AREN'T!)
My guardians-knowing I was joking-laughed with me
Cliffjumper, who had just walked in, didn't know
He threw me in the brig and then interrogated me
It was a JOKE!

#10 YOU CAN'T MAKE PERCEPTOR CRACK
While transporting some boxes of bolts to Warpath (well, the twins were transporting it, I was just sitting on the box :3), I met Preceptor
He told us, very dully, where Warpath was
I, thinking he was bored, tried to liven up his day
By telling a joke
After I told him the joke, he just stared at me
And stared at me
And stared at me
The twins finally moved along, leaving me in shock
Who doesn't like the chicken and the road joke?!
Anyway, when we got to Warpath, the big red bot could tell that I was upset
So I told him Perceptor hadn't laughed at my joke
Warpath told me not to take it personally
He said that Percy had deleted his emotions

What?
Anwho, I decided to try and make Percy crack
I tried EVERYTHING!
NOTHING worked
Like, AT ALL
I finally collapsed from exhaustion
And the twins laughed at me -_-

Phew! Done! Oh, I will be accepting ideas for these and any other new rule fanfics you see

R&R!