Mind Of Mencia: Pokemon Style!
Episode 1: Series Premiere.
SL: Hello everyone!! Yeah!! I feel so great! But I still have to let the dumb asses in here! But it will make it better. So lets start the show with a little something. I went to a fair so I brought my video camera and I recorded what went on. Watch this and laugh your ass off.
(The video starts)
SL: I am at a fair that opened near where I live and I decided to have a load of fun, and mess with people.
(SL enters the fair)
SL: Oh, look its the Dumbest person to ever try to make his dream of becoming a Pokemon Master.
Ash: Hello my people!
SL: You have none.
Ash: Misty is one of my people.
SL: In your dreams, dee dee dee.
Ash: It is a dream that will come true!
SL: Good luck with that.
(5 minutes later)
SL: Now I got my tickets. Now it is time to ride a roller coaster or something!
(Runs to a ride which swings upward and downward, and sometimes makes a complete spin)
SL: Yeah! I am gonna scream when I am on the ride!
Person #1: Give me a ticket for the ride.
(SL gives the person a ticket)
Person #1: Go right ahead.
(SL walks and then turns around and looks at Person #1)
SL: ... Ass.
(SL continues walking to take a seat on the ride)
SL: This is gonna be awesome!
??: Yeah it is!
SL: (thinks) That voice sounds familiar.
(Latches on the seats or locked and the ride begins)
(SL turns his head)
May: Hi Shiny Lucario!
SL: (screams) SON OF A BITCH!!
(5 minutes later the ride ends)
May: That was fun!
SL: There was no fun.
May: Why?
SL: Because you sat next to me, you grabbed my hand and squeezed the -- out of it! And I heard it crack, too. Well, off to another ride.
(SL walks away from May)
SL: (talks to the camera) That is why you don't do drugs, people.
(SL continues walking and sees his favorite ride ever)
SL: The classic... BUMPER CARS!!
(SL pushes everyone and cuts to be second in line)
??: Hello, hun.
SL: Nightmares won't ever end.
Harley: Isn't it great to see each other again since you killed me in Season 1 in Pokemon: Wheel Of Fortune.
SL: Axletia killed you, not me.
Harley: Who cares.
Person #2: Go ahead in.
SL: (thinks) Must use this for my advantage.
(SL walks on the arena of the Bumper Cars)
Harley: A blue one! And it is the only one!
SL: Mine, cross-dresser! (Pushes Harley down and sits in the car) Ha ha ha! I got this car!
Harley: Hmph! Rude!
SL: Tell that to someone who cares!
(3 minutes later the ride begins)
SL: Time to crash into innocent people! (Rams into a random person)
??: Watch where you are going! You could've ruined my good green hair!
SL: You are suppose to crash into people, you -- head! ...Wait a minute...
Drew: Can't you be a little less soft on the impacts!
SL: Vomit head!
Drew: -- you!
SL: (pulls out a gun) Do you really want to -- with me?
Drew: Ah! No! (drives away)
SL: Chicken. Time to crash into Harley and then he flies away! (Drives towards Harley) Time to diiiiiieee!!
Harley: (turns and sees SL coming towards him) Aaaaahh!!
(SL crashes into Harley, causing Harley to fly out of his bumper car)
SL: I hope I never see you again!
(5 minutes later at the parking lot next to a car)
SL: My "fun" is over for now. And I didn't expect to see Ash, May, Drew, or Harley. Hopefully I won't see any of them anytime soon. But I know that I will.
(Video ends)
(Audience applause)
(SL is sitting in a chair and a red carpet is rolled out across the stage and some decorations)
SL: The only fun I had was crashing into Harley and nearly killing him when he fly like a mile out of his car and his head crashed into a wall with needles sticking out. Its like causing a fatality in Mortal Kombat, but the stage was a Bumper Car arena. I guess the spinning ride or whatever it is was fun too, but May crushed my hand and it bruised hours later. See. (Holds up right hand) That palm is purple, that is why you don't tkae steriods or do drugs, people. Now onto something else. you are wondering what the decorations and the red carpet is for. What if the things in Pokemon changed. The characters, the storyline, the regions, the Pokemons, the items, ect. First, I want to start of with the crap that would never happen. Harley, get out here!
(Harley walks slowly with some bandages on the head)
SL: Ok, I know some people that bash Harley. One, because he looks like a cross-dresser. Two, he acts gay. But with if that changed, and if it did, all of you would be thinking, "Well that's bull--." Yeah, because it would never happen. But Harley did change, there would be less conflicts with Harley and May, and maybe Harley and Drew, or with all of them together. But, since we are in reality, and Harley is a freak, we will just have to deal with what we got. Now I am wondering... Who the -- are Harley's parents!?
Harley: I don't know either.
SL: Duh! Now get out of here and let me move on.
(Harley walks away)
SL: Ok, if the storyline of Pokemon completely, it would be a 10 year-old male or female starting their journey around the four regions of Pokemon, to become to dumbest of them all, like Ash, for example. He isn't smart, and since his journey started in the Kanto Region, he has gotten more stupid, and has no idea that the girls they travel them like Ash.
(Ash appears on that stage)
Ash: The girls don't like me, geez!
SL: Oh yes they do, why the hell there are a bunch of shippings about you and other characters!
Ash: Like package shipping.
SL: At first, I thought that too, but I learned, but you just get more -- stupid.
Ash: To clear things out, the girls don't like me.
SL: Ok, they love you.
Ash: No they don't.
SL: Ok, they want to -- you!
(Audience applause and laughs)
Ash: (sigh) Forget it.
SL: Ok, now get off my stage!
(Ash walks away)
SL: If a Pokemon's name were to change, this is what I think.
(A Muk comes on the stage)
SL: Yeah, some of you are thinking that I will give it a bad name, and you were right. This big blob of crap is stinky and smells like someone took a big -- in the bathroom and didn't use the air freshener and flush the toilet.
Muk: Muk! (Hey!)
SL: Deal with the truth! The name I would give Muk is... Toxic --! Seriously, Muk's odor could knock someone out, but the people backstage tried to wash him to get rid some of the stink, but I feel like puking right now. Ok, go away Muk.
(Muk goes away)
SL: Next, if I were to change a name of the region, I would pick Hoenn, because it has a word in it. I would call Hoenn, Hoe-enn. If you don't get it, find out yourself. (Looks at watch) That is all the time I have for today. See ya!
Credits:
Brought to you by Lilycove Television and created by Shiny Lucario Amazing Productions, or S.L.A.P., or Slap.
(After the show)
SL: That was f--cking awesome! Review if you liked it, if you didn't and you are going to flame, don't. If you want to give good suggestions, put them in a review, and I might use it, if it is about Pokemon, and there could be a joke made from it.