Disclaimer: read the disclaimer, cuz' I really don't ever make them so when I do there's probably a lot of shit I've warped in the making of this story. Stuff like I don't own Homestuck- the genius Andrew Hussie does, as do I not own Black Butler- a brilliant work of art belonging exclusively to Yana Toboso. There are a few references to the Kuro OVAs, but other than that I don't know of any spoilers. And if any other stories that don't belong to me are here- guess what, they don't belong to me. Now that the boring part's over, enjoy the story!
"I look fucking stupid."
Karkat looked at himself in the mirror, surveying the costume he was unwillingly wearing. His main clothing was an early-1900s style butler outfit, and he was wearing an itchy black wig that pressed against his horns uncomfortably. It had bangs that came down a little longer than the rest of the wig, and that Egbert had insisted upon since his own was "not the right style."
On Karkat's hand was a cheap temporary tattoo of a purple pentacle, making that hand itch almost unbearably. He wore gloves over both hands, so why he had to have the tattoo anyways he didn't know.
He wore black dress shoes and wore a pocket watch- he wasn't used to reading the time on human clocks, so it was just for show. Why would humans keep the confusing clocks if they had digital ones, anyways? It was just stupid.
But even more stupid was the fact that he had to wear this costume, and go out in public, and walk around with a bunch of other stupid freaks wearing stupid costumes from different dumbass cartoons and acting like they were actually those characters. What had John called it, again? That's right, an Anime con.
Lately, the Egderp had gotten obsessed with the cartoon style, and especially with a certain one featuring a demon butler and a kid earl. How he had been roped into this stupid costume shit- he didn't even remember at this point.
"You're fine, my motherfuckin' best friend. I got roped into this motherfucking shit too, remember, dude- we're in this together motherfucker…"
Gamzee was blundering around in as much of a ridiculous outfit as Karkat's, if not even more weird. He had on a long black cloak with sleeves too long like a dementor in Harry Potter (a movie Karkat had fallen asleep in front of, not being satisfied with the lack of romantic clichés). He wore a really long grey wig with two braids in the front, and atop his head was a crumpled black top hat that looked like the hatter was trying to get rid of the extra material and decided to keep it just drooping off the side. His normal makeup was magnified so that his face was all white and very pale-looking, and he had painted a black scar, like stitching across one side of his face.
Karkat rolled his eyes at the highblood and got out his computer, sitting down on the floor of Gamzee's hive. His Trollian was flashing.
- TwinArmaggedons (TA) has started trolling CarcinoGeneticist (CG):
(TA): Hii KK. Thii2 ii2 goiing two be 1 fun niight- ii love my co2tume 2o much!
(CG): WELL THAT MAKES ONE OF US.
(CG): WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO BE HERE? THIS THING I'M WEARING AS AN ITCHY PIECE OF SHIT.
(CG): I WANT NOTHING MORE NOW BUT TO GO RELAX ALONE IN MY RECOUPERACOON, BUT CERTAIN FUCKASSES DRAGGED ME ALONG ON THEIR DIPWAD CON.
(TA): Oh, come on, KK. iit'2 not that bad. We're runniing a liittle late, but I promii2e we'll be there 2oon.
(CG): A BIG FAT PIECE OF HELP YOU ARE. I HAVE A PRETTY FUCKING GOOD IDEA THIS NIGHT IS GOING TO BE STRAIGHT UP BORING AND A WASTE OF MY TIME.
(TA): You're 2uch a 2poiil 2port, KK. We're amo2t there, anyway2. 5 miinute2 max.
Karkat slapped down the hood of his laptop, more than pissed. He had yet to hear anything of actual use from the multicolored idiot. Him and Gamzee passed the time playing stupid flash games on their computers, until there was a knock on the door. Gamzee still sat at his computer, a far-off look on his face.
"Fine- I guess I'll get it then." Karkat sighed.
When he did open the door, he was greeted by one of the strangest sights he'd seen in all his sweeps- which was quite surprising. At first, Karkat didn't recognize the 3 individuals in front of him.
Sollux walked in first, wearing much the same sort of outfit Karkat was in, only his hairstyle was different- a bit longer and more tousled, and instead of his usual multicolored shades he wore square-rimmed glasses. Instead of a tie like Karkat wore on his suit, there was a small ribbon across Sollux's chest tied in a little bow-like knot. His horns, however, were a little more impossible to hide than his own, so little triangles of yellow poked out of the top. A less than convincing Claude Faustus, until Karkat saw his accomplice.
After him walked Dave, who seemed to be paired with Sollux, and was wearing a purple 1900's style coat over a green vest with a white undershirt. Along with the torso ensemble was a huge black bow where a tie would normally be. He could see the top of the long black stockings, poking out of super-high brown boots with purple bows on them. The reason he could see so high was because of the ridiculously short shorts he was wearing, that looked more like black briefs than actual pants. He no longer wore his signature shades but instead had blue contacts. The most surprising part was that he actually looked really good in his Alois Trancy outfit.
"Nithe thuit, KK- oh, haha, I mean, thebathtian." Sollux smirked.
"Sup, nubby horns" Dave said ironically.
"Hey, Karkat!" John nearly skipped in, hugging the costumed troll while giving his signature goofy smile upon greeting. And this guy said he wasn't a homosexual? Karkat quickly pushed the hyper boy off him.
John stepped back reluctantly, but was immediately smiling again, this time with determination. "You're right- I have to stay in character, after all!"
John was wearing, of course, the main character's attire. Dark blue overcoat that didn't open up in the middle like Dave's did, but it did have a black bow, albeit a much smaller and less blatantly distinctive one. He too wore shorts, but these were blue and not nearly as short. He also had long stockings, but his shoes were tan and buckled, with only a little bit of a thick heel at the end. He wore a raven-colored wig that hid his normally wild hair, and instead of his glasses he wore contacts as well as an eye patch over his right eye. Adorned on the top of his head was a blue top hat, which had a blue and white striped ribbon wrapping around its base and hanging over the side.
He tried his best to look composed, and not to smile, but it was a battle that he was quickly losing with his sparky personality, utterly in contrast with the child earl's.
"Doethn't John look cute as thiel, KK? Thurprithingly it wath all hith idea. Jutht don't rape him while we're all thtanding here." Sollux smirked as he whispered into Karkat's ear, making the shorter troll's face glow a slight tinge of red.
"Sh-shut up, you're s-so fucking stupid."
Sollux just smirked again, knowing exactly what his friend was hiding. It was true, Karkat was slightly red for the guy, but all teens go through phases, right? He just hoped that this one would be short. He also hoped he didn't get any noticeable problems that would be blatantly obvious in the current polyester pants he was wearing.
Karkat had a feeling this wasn't the start to a good day.