Author Notes:
The bottom line (as you'll see) is from the manga, but the setting follows the plot of the anime series. Set between the series ending (with SPOILER) and the movie (character plug-in).
Reaffirmation
..
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In this world beyond the Gate, the clap of his hands no longer produces alchemy. Still he does it every morning, once, before getting out of bed, silently reciting the atomic reactions and picturing the crackling of energy from his hands.
A soldier should not forgo his daily training. Neither should an alchemist.
In his mind, fresh from dreams of Amestris, the familiar light of the transmutation reaction closes the door on that beloved world, and he rises to another day of mechanics research.
Machines don't interest him as much, but he thinks of Winry, of her eyes that must be sparkling at the sight of what he gets to see here, then studies a little harder.
He draws diagrams instead of transmutation circles, measures angles and distances instead of masses. Careful calculations work the magic in mechanics just like in alchemy, and he's fine with that.
He even studies automails, a little bit, just so he can do his own maintenance of his artificial limbs. There is hardly any literature he can find on that topic, though; people here seem to be more interested in outer space than in their own bodies. What little he knows, he puts together from the engineering basics he's learned and observation of the automails attached to his body.
He has made a few fixes here and there, but he keeps that arm and leg Hohenheim made for him. If and when he decides to replace them, it will be by his mechanic.
He goes to bed early. It's sort of necessary, as sleep only comes at least an hour after. Lying down on his bed with eyes closed, images of the past come even more rapidly than they do during the day, not that he minds. He sorts through them carefully, picking up little details, remembering the interesting ones to tell as stories later.
He re-carves those memories everyday, the memories he carries for his brother, the memories he carries alone for that awaited day.
He dreams as much of the future as of the past, yearns for the reunion as much as he dreads having failed to send Al back. It has been much easier being positive when his brother was there to chastise him.
Sometimes he pictures Al in the armour still, because his original body looks too much like Alphonse Heiderich, and he can't stand the image of Al laughing at his stories like they are mere jokes instead of a real part of their lives, as Heiderich does.
Not that it stops him from telling them to that partner of his, during their short breaks and the occassional trips they make, because then the day passes a little faster, and the distance between his two worlds feels a little closer.
And so his soul, the only thing that's holding the two together, doesn't have to stretch as far, to the verge of breaking, as it feels sometimes.
In this world beyond the Gate, the clap of his hands no longer produces alchemy. Still he does it everyday, and sees the transmutation reactions in his mind.
When Heiderich sees the posture, he thinks he is praying. Edward doesn't correct him.
.
..
