Disclaimer (actually, this is the first time I included one of these... ^^'): FMA is not mine. Following intensive therapy, I have (just about) come to terms with this fact XD
Written very much on the spur of the moment after an FMA fest. I was planning to include a hardcore sex scene, but in the end I just loved the last line too much. Yes, I'm well-aware that I'm blowing my own trumpet XD
As always, you don't have to review as it won't stop me writing anyway, but I do greatly appreciate any feedback ^^
Roy Mustang was sitting in his office doing paperwork.
OK, that was obviously bullshit. But he was sitting in his office, so it wasn't completely untrue. Just mostly.
So…if he wasn't doing paperwork…then what was he doing? Well, this was what Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist on a mission, was trying to find out. However, after roughly twenty minutes with his ear pressed against the door and (still) no clues, his patience was wearing thin.
"What the hell is that damn colonel doing?!" he muttered to himself. The voice inside his head (which spoke up from time to time with smart comments, sounding suspiciously like Mustang himself) countered with: Why are you so interested?
I'm NOT interested. He's just been in there for like four hours now.
So? It's his office, he IS entitled to work.
You know as well as I do that Mustang doesn't work. And anyway, the curtains are drawn.
Oh, that's SO very incriminating. He's obviously covered himself in peanut butter and is in the middle of a fourteen-hooker gangb– hey, why are you blushing?
I'm not blushing, dammit! It's too hot in here, that's all.
During this brief mental exchange (honestly, sometimes he wondered whether state work had driven him insane), Ed had been trying to think up a good excuse for bursting into Roy's office without knocking. He figured that if he just went straight in, unannounced, with no warning, Mustang wouldn't have a chance to hide whatever he was doing, chocolate body paint or not.
Wait…chocolate–? Ah, just stop thinking about it and go in! You can always come up with an excuse if he makes a fuss! Say Al got kidnapped or something!
Ed placed his hand on the door knob. Come on! I've faced scarier shit than this! I've fought homunculi for alchemy's sake!
Taking a deep breath, the blond alchemist turned the handle slowly, opening the door as silently as he could. He was immediately relieved to notice two things: 1) Mustang's back was to him, so he hadn't seen him come in and 2) the steady beat coming from the headphones he was wearing meant that he most likely hadn't heard him either. In any case, he seemed to be completely focused on whatever was currently occupying the screen of his laptop. From this distance, it was impossible for Ed to see what it was that the colonel was so engrossed in. He took a couple of steps closer, halting suddenly at the sound of a quiet-yet-forceful exclamation.
"Fuck."
For some reason the sound of that word when it was said in the colonel's voice (not to mention in a sort of half-whisper) made Ed's face heat up.
Fag, stated the voice, sounding extremely smug.
I am NOT.
A stream of almost intelligible mumblings was coming from where Mustang sat rigid, as if frozen in time.
"No…not there…you bastard…come on, a little over…yeah, that's it…dammit…"
What the hell–?! What was–?!
Shit, is he watching PORN or something?!
Fuck.
Yeah, thinking about THAT wasn't such a good idea now was it?
Oh, will you shut the fuck up?!
Ed was in two minds about what to do. On the one hand, he could leave. He hadn't been planning to interrupt a jerk-off session. He could just walk out of the room, pretend he hadn't seen or heard anything and go and see what Al was doing.
And on the other hand, he could stay…
And do what? Ask to join in? Fag.
I'm not a damn–!
Denial.
Screw you!
He might if you ask him nicely.
Stay…or go?
Hang on. I don't even know exactly what he's doing. Might as well check before I make any stupid decisions.
And so it was with growing apprehension and a lump in his throat that Edward Elric, now extremely close to solving the mystery (and trying very hard to block out the dirty mental pictures that kept creeping into his mind), crept slowly towards the back of the uniformed man. Roy was still muttering, but not loud enough to be heard. The bass of whatever he was listening to thumped audibly, adding to the growing tension. Ed stole forward, now close enough to reach out and touch the colonel if he wanted to. Which he didn't.
With baited breath, he leaned further forward…
…and came face to face with a surprisingly familiar screen, just as Roy's song ended.
"You're playing TETRIS?!?!"
The sound that came out of Roy's mouth was a sort of combination of noises. The majority of it was similar to the screech emitted by a cat after having its tail trodden on.
"Fullmetal you bastard!" Realising who the intruder was, Mustang flushed an uncharacteristic shade of scarlet and struggled to regain his composure. "You– you should– NEVER enter a superior– the ROOM of a superior without permission!" The colonel scowled darkly, looking increasingly more pissed off, although whether it was with Ed or himself, neither was quite sure.
"Sorry colonel," Ed said, injecting just the right amount of insolence into his tone. "Lieutenant Hawkeye sent me to see what you were doing. She was worried about you." Not bad for an on-the-spot cover up.
"You may inform her that her concern is unnecessary." The flame alchemist turned his attention back to the screen, only to be met with a towering pile of accumulated bricks and a notice that stated, bluntly, GAME OVER.
"Shit. Trust you to screw up my score, Fullmetal."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ed snapped defensively. "You can hardly blame me for the fact that you're slacking off!"
"I can blame you for anything I want, shrimp."
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT THAT HE SHOULD BE CLONED SEVEN TIMES AND PUT IN A DISNEY MOVIE?!?!"
"I hardly said that, now did I?"
Ed was all set to continue his rant when an icon on Mustang's taskbar happened to catch his attention.
"Hey…what's that?"
Following the direction of the teen's finger, Roy glanced at the icon, blanched and then turned crimson seconds later, attempting to conceal the screen. "It's nothing."
Of course, this unexpected reaction merely heightened the blond's curiosity. "…hey, hang on, that's a slash site! Why the hell are you reading slash?!"
Mustang drew himself up to his full height in an attempt to retain the few scraps of dignity he had left. "Firstly, although it contains slash, it is not exclusively or even primarily a slash site. Second, what I read or look at is hardly any of your business. And third…how do you know it's a slash site? Been indulging in a little late-night…research, Fullmetal?"
"I have not! It's just that…well…Winry reads that stuff sometimes and so she tells me about them…" God, that excuse sounded crap even to his own ears.
"Yeah, whatever. Most of the pairings involve me, you know. Hardly surprising, seeing as I'm the most popular guy in central, not to mention everywhere else."
"That's bullshit and you know it! I'm in the most…pairings…"
God, how Ed hated that smirk. Almost as much as he hated being caught out.
And there was no denying that he had been.
Shit.
"Whatever." Ed shrugged in an attempt to appear nonchalant. "So which pairing are you reading, then?"
"Well, one with me in it, obviously…after all, what pairing's complete without me as one half?"
"Why am I not surprised." The blond sighed. "So who's the other half?"
"Hmm…if I recall correctly…some Fullmetal shrimp…?"
"WHO ARE YOU CALLING TOO TINY TO–"
Wait, what?
Mustang…
Reading slash…
About me? About him and me? Together?
W.
T.
F.
As the penny dropped, the flame alchemist sat watching, waiting for Ed's reaction. The bead of sweat glistening on his brow belied his seemingly calm exterior.
Don't even THINK about it. Keep your sordid thoughts to yourself.
Oh stfu.
The teen licked his lips, his mouth suddenly bone dry. "You mind if I read?"
The older man simply shrugged and nodded, as if he had expected this response all along. "If you want. I'm watching the author but I wouldn't say this is one of her better ones."
At this, Ed paused in his reading of the disclaimer. "Wait…you actually have an account on here?"
"Like I said, not any of your business."
"Fine. Have it your way." The blond continued to scroll through the text, Roy closely observing. "OK…so it's just chatting…pah, as if I would ever say that…this is really pretty tame…of all the things to read, this…wait a minute, MUSTANG PUT HIS HAND WHERE?!?!?!"
"Here, wasn't it?"
Ed looked from the smirk plastered across the colonel's face, to the hand resting on his inner thigh, metaphorically scorching his skin, and then back again.
"Colonel," he said through gritted teeth, trying and failing to keep his face from colouring at the intimate contact, "this isn't funny."
"Who's laughing?" The hand began to move upwards. Ed closed his eyes.
"Stop. I don't want this."
"Oh really? Strange, something about you seems to be convincing me otherwise. Can't think what it could be though. Besides the amazingly obvious hard-on in your pants, that is."
This isn't happening this isn't happening this isn't happening…
Why not?
It CAN'T be. He's not– I'm not–
I don't know about him, but YOU certainly are.
"Back off Mustang," the smaller-than-average alchemist hissed. "I'm not some easy screw, dammit."
"I guessed you'd be wanting romancing, seeing as you're a first-timer." The hand was removed as Roy stood up. "Come here, then."
To Ed's chagrin, his body moved almost instinctively towards the taller man. With surprising affection, Mustang placed a hand either side of the teen's face. Their eyes met, and something in the colonel's coal-black depths made it impossible for Ed to pull away.
Roy moved towards him with excruciating slowness. Ed had plenty of opportunity to pull back. So why wasn't he doing that? Why was it that, instead, he found himself craning upwards expectantly, seeking out the man's mouth with his own?
Kissing wasn't something that he had experienced before. Sure, when he was younger, there had been the odd peck involving Winry and a game of Truth-Or-Dare, but that didn't really count. At least, it didn't in this sort of situation. What the hell was he thinking?! He had no idea what he was doing! And what's more, Mustang would probably make fun of him for it!
This discouraging train of thought was brought to a sudden halt when a gloved hand took his chin between thumb and forefinger, tilting his face upwards and hot lips covered his.
Ed gasped involuntarily at the sensation – something he'd been totally unprepared for. It was awkward and complicated and faltering and so damn real that every fantasy he'd ever had (more of them involving Roy than he'd ever care to admit) paled in comparison. He kept his eyes closed for a little while after the kiss had ended, but when he opened them, Roy was still there. Ed was quite pleased to see that the older man looked slightly apprehensive. It was only when he smiled that Mustang's expression relaxed.
"You sneaky bastard. Stealing my first kiss."
"Sorry. Do you want it back?" Saying that, the flame alchemist lifted the teen onto the desk, dipping his head so that their mouths could meet again. After the initial shock of being picked up, Ed's new-found confidence kicked in and he found he was able to break off, if only momentarily.
"That was a terrible line."
"It worked though, didn't it?"
"It was still awful."
"My apologies, I'm sure. Now shut up so I can kiss you again." Similar to the others, the kiss started off as chaste, but unlike the previous ones it soon escalated as Ed became more self-assured with every touch. It was mind-blowing to open his mouth against Roy's, even more so when their tongues met; almost too much for his psyche to cope with. Coming to the conclusion that maybe it was best to just not think about it too much, he broke away, hesitating only briefly before pressing his lips to Mustang's neck. The dark-haired man let out a gasp, arching into the contact. Spurred on by this reaction, Ed loosened the collar of Roy's uniform, exposing more skin which he then proceeded to mouth-molest as best he could. Judging by the sounds that the colonel was making, it seemed fairly safe to assume that his administrations were proving very successful.
Without warning, Roy pulled the blond towards him and they landed on the carpet in a heap. Ed barely had time to say "Smooth" before the flame alchemist had flipped them over so that he was straddling the younger alchemist, crushing their lips and bodies together again.
In this compromising position, Ed could feel that Roy was just as hard as he was and that knowledge, instead of making him feel uncomfortable or embarrassed, actually inspired a feeling of self-satisfaction.
Not to mention that it really turned him on.
A purple-ish bruise was forming on Mustang's neck as he dug his fingertips into Ed's hips, pushing them upwards and against his own. Ed managed to find space between their bodies to unfasten and remove the jacket the colonel was wearing, letting it slide to the floor unnoticed. Almost at the same time, Roy unfastened the catch on the teen's jacket, whipping it off with a suspicious amount of skill and throwing it somewhere in the room – neither really cared where. Ed was suddenly extremely aware that all that was between the upper halves of their bodies was a sheer white shirt and a black tank top (not that all that much was between their lower halves either) a fact that Mustang seemed keen to remedy as he tugged on the bottom of the tank top and Ed obediently lifted his arms above his head, struck by the thought that the colonel was completely dominating the situation. Although, if he was honest, he didn't really mind.
In fact he quite liked it.
Roy's shirt was disposed of equally hastily (Ed suspected that some of the buttons might need to be replaced) and new skin-on-skin contact was established, making them shudder. Both alchemists ran their hands over hard muscle, seeking out sensitive spots as they licked at each other's lips, savouring the moans that they produced. It was only when impatient fingers began to unfasten the buckle on his belt that Ed finally realised just how far this was close to going.
"Colonel, wait. Wait…" Ed untangled himself with some difficultly, scooting backwards across the floor.
"You don't want to?" The look in Roy's eyes was almost painful as he fixed him with an injured gaze. He looked thoroughly ravished and almost totally out of control – Ed was pleased to note that his hands were shaking. He took a few seconds to admire his handiwork before remembering his original point.
"It's not that I don't want to…it's just that…don't you think things are moving a little fast?"
Mustang sighed and sat up. "Maybe…sorry, I keep forgetting that this is your first time."
"Hey, that's not the only reason! We're on the floor of your office, for another! That's certainly not where I expected my first time to be!"
"Well, where did you expect it to be?"
"A bed, maybe?!"
"Fine. And who with?"
Ed blushed and looked adorable, whether he was aware of it or not. "That…that's none of your business…"
"Oh?" The colonel raised an eyebrow. "And what if I ordered you to tell me? I'm still your superior, after all."
"I…well…I never expected…more sort of imagined…look, does it really matter?"
"I think so."
The silence that followed was full of a kind of fearful tension. Ed struggled with the decision of whether to say something or not, even getting as far as opening his mouth a couple of times, only to immediately close it again. Roy was just about to say something, maybe tell him to forget it, maybe just give the order, when he finally spoke up.
"It was…it was you, OK? I always wanted it to be with you."
Mustang froze for a minute, then picked up the phone, dialling a number with almost inhuman speed. "Hughes? Please arrange a car to take me back to my apartment. If anyone enquires as to where I've gone, inform them that I shall be working from home for the remainder of today."
Ed slumped dejectedly as Roy gathered up their clothes, handing him the tank top and jacket. They got dressed in silence. The colonel strode to the door without a backwards glance, turning the handle and exiting without saying goodbye. Ed was left standing in the middle of the carpeted office, feeling more stupid (not to mention used) than he'd ever felt before.
Then Roy's head popped back around the door, making him jump.
"Well?" he said with a grin, "Aren't you coming?"
Thanks very much for reading =) Hope you liked it!