A/N: Heyy, sry I just started this before finishing my other stories, but it was just knawing and clawing at the inside of my head just begging to be let loose and once my fingers hit the keys... well I just couldn't keep it to myself. I really hope you enjoy. And if you do (heck even if u DON'T) I would love to see some reviews. REVIEWS KEEP A STORY ALIVE!! U wouldn't want to kill a brand new story would you? No, of coarse not, I didn't think so. So pleace review!
Oh, almost forgot "I do not 'own' twilight including it's characters SETH, Jake, Leah, Sam..." you get the point. With that said, Let's move on shall we? This story takes place post-breaking dawn. Still in forks/ Lapush. About two years after everything to be exact. The story is in the POV (point of view) of a 17 year old werewolf named "Kait" who is in Sam's pack. This is the life of a 17 year old werewolf with a step dad, a mom who doesn't understand her daughters strange behavior (even after 14 years of werewolfism Kaitlyn's mom still doesn't know) and her friendship with the blonde shaggy wolf with the tempting eyes and blinding smile.
Please enjoy- and remember REVIEW, please it only takes a second I SWEAR!!!
We are friends. Only friends. Nothing romantic. Right?
I roll my eyes, but I'm careful not to laugh. I would have covered my mouth to make sure a sound didn't escape but I was focusing on not dropping my books and bag as I struggle to get into the car. Once safely inside I take a deep breath to assure the laughs don't escape.
I mean, Everybody's going to go to heaven! We'll see everyone we love and we won't be hungry and everyone will be happy… What isn't humorous about that? My youngest sibling, at two, is probably to happiest person in the world. Not that I'm all doom and gloom, usually it takes at least a few good pushes to even get a rise out of me… but everybody? That's just unrealistic.
But I don't laugh, because I kind of have to believe he's right. You see my father passed away, and I have to believe no matter what sins you have you can still make it to those pearly gates. Suicide. That's the sin- well not really. That's what the papers just said. No, I'm not in denial. I'm serious. It wasn't suicide, it was sacrifice. He killed his self so that I wouldn't become what he was. But it was too late anyway. He still passed down the genes that had made him what he was. A wolf. A hunter. You get the point. "Werewolf." That's the word you'd use.
So you see, I have to believe that he went to a better place. Because if he didn't I surly wont. But I already know I'm not going to heaven. But that's also why I can't laugh. Mom doesn't even know why dad did what he did. She doesn't know what I am. She would die if she knew I even had the thought that I'm not going to heaven.
"Yes, of coarse Royce." She tells the small boy and he smiles.
Yes Royce. You, me, dad, and Hitler. We're ALL going to live happily in heaven where you can frolic in the flowers, Hitler has an endless supply of Jews and me and dad can eat all the vampires we want! Great, I'm comparing myself to Hitler. This can't be good for my dwindling self-esteem. I already hate myself of reveling in the feeling of the change. I hate myself when I kill people- vampires- people whatever you want to call them. And I especially hate myself for loving what I am. I hate what I love and I love what I hate. What an awful web I've wove.
"Is God invisible?" My younger sister, Annabel, asks my mother.
If there was this all powerful man you speak of, why would he condone souls like myself to this life I live?
"Yes honey, he is every where, and he's always watching you."
I'm the sunshine in your hair. I'm the shadow on the ground. I'm the whisper in the wind. I'm your imaginary friend. I think the lyrics to "I'm already there" by Lonestar. Ya, there's a God. An imaginary force that bounds me to this God Da-
"To be hurt. To feel lost. To be left out in the dark…" My phone rings.
Mom shakes her head, "I wish you wouldn't listen to such 'emo' songs."
I roll my eyes, "Maybe I am 'emo', mom." I counter as I fish my phone out of my pocket. I pull my sleeves down just to freak her out.
She grabs my arm and throws the sleeve up and stares at my pale arm with…(big surprise!) nothing on it. The only thing covering my arm is one long scare I acquired as a kid from a 'dog bite'. At least that's what I told mom. Really I got in a fight with another wolf. Less she knows the better, I always say.
"Find what your looking for?" I ask her.
"To be kicked when your down. To feel like you've been pushed around…"
"It isn't funny. Kids die from that kind of stuff."
Me dying? That's a good one, mom! I laugh inside my head but just smirk at her on the outside.
"Not emo mom. Just like the song." I tell her.
"To be on the edge of breaking down and no ones there to save you…"
"Hey?" I say into the phone, without looking at the caller ID first.
"IT'S A PARTY IN THE U.S.A!"
"Umm… hello?"
"OmyGod! Sorry, I didn't think you would answer and-"
"There is never an excuse for singing her music into my phone." I say only half joking. "What do you want Seth?" We reach the drive way and I grab my bags and jump out so I can talk without worrying about mom hearing.
"What's wrong with you?" Seth asks me in a concerned tone.
Keep it buried. Deep down, where nothing ever goes wrong, where no light penetrates. Leave it to boiland simmer, adding to it constantly. And then one day when it cannot be controlled any longer… I chant inside my head.
"What isn't wrong? I'm a teenage werewolf, who's mother doesn't understand her, her siblings think 'everyone goes to heaven where the sun smiles and we all wear gold shoes and ride shot gun with God…' and Sam's got me running patrol like there's no freakin' tomorrow." I take a deep breath.
"I told you, you should join our pack. Jake doesn't force us to do anything and you don't have to put up with all Sam's crap, and I miss you." Seth whines into the phone.
"I've been thinking about it but I don't know how to. And Jake isn't a big fan of even having a pack. I'd hate to impose and ruin his life too…" I trail off, caught in my own thought. The thought of spending all that time with Seth is just about too tempting.
"Jake thinks of you like a little sister. He adores you. He'd be glade to have you in the pack!" He pauses and I can hear the grin in his voice, "You can't be any worse than Leah, you know?"
I laugh at that and hold the phone closer to my ear relishing in his sweet, calming, mature, innocent, sexy voice. "Hey, she isn't that bad." I counter in a playful tone.
"Oh ya, I forgot you two are friends." He laughs quietly, "I really miss you though. I haven't seen you in like… a week?" He whines again.
I shiver and goose bumps cover my neck, arms, and legs. "I know, I miss you too, Seth. But I don't know if I can just leave the pack."
"Well can I at least come over?" He pleads.
I smile, "Maybe, hold one sec, I'll ask mom."
"Cool."
I hold the phone to my shoulder and can hear him humming my ring tone quietly. I laugh at how cute he is and open the door from the back porch and walk inside. I walk over to the kitchen and find mom bent over some sort of dough. I pull off a piece and stuff it into my mouth before she can say anything. She rolls her eyes, "Hey, mom?" I ask sweetly.
"Yes, hon?"
"Can Seth come over for a bit?"
"And how long is a 'bit', Kaitlyn?" She counters putting her hands on her hips.
"Well… there is a House marathon on tonight so… until tomorrow?"
"You're asking me if Seth can spend the night?" She crosses her arms.
"Yes." I say not shaken the least bit by her words.
"I guess so, you'd probably just sneak him in once I went to sleep anyway." She goes back to rolling the dough.
I already knew she'd say yes. She just adores Seth. He is really good with parents. That came out wrong. That's what you say about a boyfriend who is good with your parents. We aren't a 'couple'. He doesn't even like me like that.
"I really miss you." His words run through my head.
"His sweet, calm, mature, innocent, SEXY voice…" Do I like him? Surly not. You can't like your best friend. Can you?
"Hey there beautiful." Seth says as he walks through the porch door. We've know each other since forever, no need to knock when your basically family, right?
Hey there beautiful. He's just kidding right? I mean nothings changed in the past years. I mean I turned seventeen yesterday, but nothings changed.
"Hey, Seth!" I say and give him a hug. "And by the way, I saw you at school the other day. It hasn't been 'a week'." I laugh and pull away from him.
His eyes still linger on me with adoration. "It feels like it's been a week." He says and sticks his hand out. I look at it for a moment before engaging in our secret hand shake. "So, you gonna join the pack?" He asks and laces his fingers into mine.
My breath hitches and he chuckles softly, "I think," I start slowly, playing with his hand, "that being in Sam's pack sucks, and that we don't spend enough time together." He smiles at me and I feel my lips pull up at the corners, "But also," He grin turns to a lopsided smile, "that just leaving the pack isn't a good idea."
"Why not?" He ask taking my other hand so had he is holding both.
"Well, first off Collin and Brady need a babysitter." I think of the first excuse that pops into my head.
"They're older than you. Why do you have to baby-sit them?" He is whining again.
"Have you met Collin and Brady?" I ask and my smile widens as he laughs.
"It's nor fair. Why do they get to have all of you?" He still hasn't dropped my hands and our hand shake has been long over. I don't mine though.
"What? Would you rather have me all to your self?" I ask in a playful tone.
He blushes a deep red. His tan white skin turns every shade, and I resist the urge to reach out and stroke his cheek. He is a lot like a miniature Jake, but he is paler, blue eyed, and blonde, ad sweeter than anyone I know. "I would like that very very very much." He chuckles softly.
Mom walks onto the back porch and I drop my hand from Seth's. I don't think she'd approve of him staying the night if she saw that. But it was just friendly, right? "Hello Seth. Cookies are in the oven Kaitlyn. Would you please take them out in about twenty minutes? I'm going to bed." She turns back to the door, but stops. "Have a good evening you two." She throws over her shoulder and retreats to bed.
"Told you she doesn't understand." I whisper in Seth's ear and he turns toward me. Our faces are so close I can smell the scent of him rolling off his skin. I look down at his lips, so plump, so close. "You want to go for a run?" I blurt out and back away from him. I don't know why, but I just can't admit to feeling for him quite yet. Because I don't, right? We're only friends. Nothings changed. It's not like just because I'm older he suddenly feels romantic feelings toward me, right? I mean that isn't possible, is it? You can just suddenly feel a new way about someone, can you? You can't just be like a big brother and then suddenly the hottest, most sexy, most beautiful…
Seth is in front of me again and I can smell him every where. I close my eyes and my forehead falls against his. "Seth…" I breath. I see him bite his lip but he doesn't rush anything. Because this is nothing, right? I pull away and take a deep breath, but I can taste his scent in the air. I do they only thing I can do to avoid his loving eyes, and my emotions. I phase and run into the woods. I'm not exactly "a relationship person". And we are defiantly not in that kind of relationship… are we? Of coarse not… right?
Don't forget, that little box right below the story, ya that one, click it please and just write a little something. U know telling me if i should continue or just start collecting cat's cause it sucks and I have NO FUTURE. Please, really it only take a moment!
Thanks for reading, hope u enjoyed!!! I know I enjoyed writing it!