PROLOGUE
"Bammie, we can't continue on like this."
I gaped, feeling betrayed within an instant. He was still putting his clothes back on, barely finished with what we had just done, and already he was suggesting we stop? Perhaps he was going to say that we would become more committed instead of just having plenty of one-night stands continuously, but I was let down.
"You have your life to get to, and I have mine. We both have fiancées to tend to, and we cannot let our lust distract us."
Lust? Is that all it was to him? I felt it was much more than lust.
"Your place is here in West Chester and mine is in Helsinki. I'm sorry."
"But…" I finally spoke, "You can't…we can't…I need you Ville…"
"You don't need me. Plus, Missy needs you. Be there for her."
I'd rather be there for you. I didn't truly love Missy, she had merely been a distraction, something to make people think I was straight. I had no clue if I was truly gay, or if I was bisexual, but either way, I hadn't wanted people to know that I was turned on by men. Most of all, I didn't want anyone to know I wanted Ville.
"I want to be there for you."
He shook his head, "No you don't, Bammie. You only think you do."
The hurt was beyond obvious in my eyes now, I could feel it inside, but it didn't seem to affect him at all. I wanted to cry, but at the same time, I was afraid to show any signs of weakness. He finished buttoning his shirt, and grabbed his jacket. I felt myself crumbling even more as he slipped on his jacket, and looked back at me.
"I have to go now. You'll understand someday."
No I wouldn't. I knew I wouldn't. "But I…I want you…"
"I know how much it hurts, but you'll get over it. You'll move on."
He opened up my bedroom door and walked out. I stood there for a moment, depressed and unsure of what to do, so finally, I decided to run after him. By the time I reached him, he was already opening up the front door. I grabbed him arm and turned him around, throwing my lips over his as quickly and passionately as I could.
Pulling away, I whispered, "Please don't go."
"I'm sorry, Bammie," he began, "But I have to. Take care."