New re-post of my story, "Wife Swap: Cullen's vs Clark's".

I know the Cullen's wouldn't be stupid enough to go on TV, as their secret would be exposed, and I know the wouldn't still live in Forks after all these years. So just go with the flow.

P.S- They do still live in Forks in my story... Same house, same cars... and Renesmee would look to be around about 13, 14 or 15 years old.

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Emmett's POV.

"EMMETT McCARTY CULLEN, DO NOT PRESS THAT !#$%^&* BUTTON!" Alice screeched from upstairs in her room, where she was probably picking out everyone's outfits for the next day.

I was pretty sure the humans in Seattle would have heard that, she was so loud.

"Geez, calm down, Alice". I muttered to myself as I moved the little arrow on the laptops screen and clicked 'print'. "It's just a tiny innocent button and you do not have to yell at me. I am a vampire".

"NO, IT IS NOT EMMETT!". She screeched, darting down the flights of stairs with super human speed and coming to a halt beside me in front of the printer. My adopted pixie like sister started tapping her foot impatiently as the pages spilled out neatly in to the printers tray. My Rosie finally looked up from her thick fashion magazine.

"What's going on?" She asked, quite clueless to our 'disagreement' and directed her question to Alice.

"Well," Eddie answered, suddenly appearing from the kitchen with my niece and sister-in-law in tow, "from what I see" He said, and nodded at me, "Emmett has decided he is going to fill out a Wife Swap application so we can be on the television show".

"We're going to be in deep trouble". Jasper muttered from his place on the couch where he was reading.

"Cool!" Nessie exclaimed and came bouncing over next to me and collected the freshly printed documents. She then laid them out on the small coffee table which was between the two couches we had.

Eddie sighed, "I can see Emmett has no intention of not sending out the application and even if we all him no he will find a way... So I guess we may as well fill it out now".

"Yes!" I whooped and jumped up from the chair to do an air punch.

"But we all have to be very careful to keep our secret". Eddie added. "And stop calling me Eddie!"

"Yes sir". I replied and everyone quickly followed with mumbles of things like, "fine", "alright" and the best of all was "of course sir daddy mister!" which of course was from Nessie. I did an army salute at Edward before getting a pen and sitting down next to my niece on the couch.

"Okay, so who am I pretending to be?" I asked no one in particular.

"Carlise". Bella informed me.

I looked searched though the papers and found the first question. Well this one was easy;

Family name - Cullen. I scrawled.

Fathers name and age - Carlisle 30. That seemed like a reasonable age. Edward nodded.

Mothers name and age - Esme 29.

Names and ages of children from this marrige -

Isabella 18. Bella grumbled quietly when I wrote her full name as she preferred to be called by her nickname. I ignored her and carried on writing.

Edward 17.

Emmett 19.

Rosalie 18. "How come you get to be a year younger and I don't?" Rose whined.

"Cause I'm awesome".

Jasper 19. Rosalie growled again.

Alice 17. Well, she was small enough. I don't think anyone living with us for two weeks would believe she was really 19 anyway.

Renesmee. I paused and looked at her. 14, I wrote.

Bella nodded in agreement.

"What about Jacob?" Renesmee piped up. "He spends so much time here anyway".

Jacob 19. Renesmee squealed with delight. "Jake", she yelled to the dog basically chowing down the kitchen, "you're living here for two weeks". I was glad I had made my niece happy, even if I did have to put up with werewolf stench for a couple of weeks.

"Okay". He replied. I knew he had super dog hearing, being a shape-shifter and all ,so he would've heard our entire conversation.

I turned back to the application.

Fathers job and work schedule - Doctor 9am - 8pm, Monday to Saturday.

Mothers job and work schedule - Stay at home mom, part time home interior designer. .

How long have you been together? - 13 years.

If married, for how long? - 9 years.

Who takes care of the following responsibilities in your family-

Childcare - Esme.

Shopping - Alice and/or Rosalie.

Cleaning - Esme, Alice, Edward or Bella.

Cooking - Esme and Edward.

Money - Carlisle and Alice.

Social life - Esme, kids organize their own.

Kids homework - Kids.

What pushes your buttons? - I paused for a second before scrawling down one word; Emmett.

Pets? - I thought about writing Jacob's name down... Nah. None.

Describe dinner time in your family - Well if I wrote the truth they would have a heart attack. Dinner time in our family is not organized in our family as we all come home at different times and have our own preferences in what we eat and at what time.

What rules must your children follow? - No damaging the house and any of it's contents. Also, the children must respect each other.

I folded the papers and grabbed an envelope from next to the computer in the family room. The room was silent and everyone was watching me as I sealed the envelope with my venom.

"So", I exclaimed once I'd finished. "Who would like to post it?"

Okay, so that was my intro chapter.

Review and thank you for taking your time to read this. A new chapter will be up soon...