The gentle knock at the door startled her from her nest of blankets, on the living room couch. She blinked away the sleepy weight of her eyelids and frowned at the offending noise. Who would be dropping in, in the middle of the day on a...God, she was so tired she didn't even remember what day it was. She slipped the baby from her breast and resettled the tiny girl on her shoulder, standing while she attempted to close the zipper on the hoodie she had usurped from her husband. Her daughter grunted in sleep, and Kate bounced her gently, patting the baby's diapered bottom as she made her way to the door.
"Who's here, baby girl? Huh?" she smiled, kissing her daughter's downy head as she swung the door open. "Dad?"
"Katie," her father grinned, chuckling at the expression of surprise on Kate's face. "Has it really been that long?" He moved in, to kiss her cheek, and she rolled her eyes.
"It's like, 2:30, on a weekday. Why aren't you at work?"
Jim Beckett slipped his jacket from his shoulders and draped it on the back of the couch, rolling up his shirt sleeves as he turned to his daughter. "I took a half day," he shrugged. I know Rick is signing books today, and I thought I'd take some time to visit my two favorite girls." Kate grinned as her father reached out for the baby, "Now give me my granddaughter."
"I see what's happening here," she teased, sliding the still sleeping baby into Jim's arms. "You came here to see her, and she just happens to be an appendage of mine for the immediate future. That's okay. I'm getting used to being sloppy seconds." Grinning still, thrilled with her father's unexpected company, Kate turned toward the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. The truth was, she loved how much her father doted on the baby. He was so proud to be a grandfather, and it had been so long since she had seen her father's face alight with such joy.
"Who can blame me," Jim finally tore his eyes from his tiny granddaughter, "she's just too perfect to stay away."
"I won't argue with that," Kate agreed, caressing her baby's cheek softly, before easing herself back onto the sofa. Her father took a seat on the opposite end and settled back into the plush cushions.
"So, how's it going?"
Kate sighed and ran her free hand through her mildly disheveled curls. "I'm exhausted, but we're doing great. Aren't we Lily James?" Her father grinned with pride, the same lopsided smile every time he heard his granddaughter's name, and Kate fought back an unexpected wave of emotion.
"She still not sleeping well?"
Kate sighed again, "She's getting better, I'm only up three or four times a night now, and you think after more than 15 years of midnight body drops, I'd be used to it, but for some reason, I can't make it work."
"Everything will fall into place soon, Katie-bug. I promise. But any time you and Rick need a nap, I would be happy to come and take my little peanut out for a walk." He settled the baby on his thighs and spread his hand across her tiny chest.
"Sooner rather than later, I hope. I've only got a few more weeks before I'm back in the precinct full time, and Castle has been studiously avoiding the topic of what happens next." Kate gazed wistfully at her sleeping daughter. She was going to miss her daughter horribly, while she was at work, but she knew she wasn't cut out to be idle, she longed for the precinct on the days when the monotony became overwhelming. "It's been working out well so far. I spend a few hours at work, two days a week, Rick brings the baby in when she gets hungry and hangs out in the bullpen while she sleeps in my office. I think he's missing the challenge too."
"You two have been at it a long time," her father smiled. It's hard to go back once you've found something you're passionate about.
"I know," Kate sighed, taking a long sip from her mug. "He's feeling guilty, I think. He wanted nothing more than to stay home with Alexis full time, when she was a baby, and I think it bothers him that he doesn't feel the same now, with Lily."
"Rick's a different man now, Katie," Jim shifted to focus more on his daughter's troubled features. "Just because he's considering all his options, doesn't mean he loves Lily any less than Alexis."
"I know that, Dad," Kate's voice rose slightly, and she winced as the baby startled and blinked her eyes open. She watched with mild amusement as the tiny eyes rolled back in their sockets and the baby, once again, succumbed to the heavy pull of sleep. "I know that, and he knows that too," she began, softer now, "but the thought of leaving her with a stranger, even if it's only for a few days a week, kills him. I'm not thrilled with the prospect of finding the person I'm supposed to trust with my child's life, but I want Rick to be happy."
Jim shifted again, "Well, I'd be happy to take up the position, if that's what you two decide." Kate stopped mid sip and looked up at her dad, surprise blanketing her features. "Are you serious? You want to spend the day being a manny? Law not cutting it for you anymore?"
It was Jim's turn to sigh, as he caressed the baby's soft head. "I've been thinking about retiring for a while now, or at the very least, cutting down my hours to a few days a week. I'm not getting any younger, and I want to be able to do things like pop in to visit my family for no reason, mid-week, or go fishing upstate. This little one makes me feel more alive than I have in a long time, Katie-bug, and as horrible as that may sound to you, I didn't know how much I needed it, until she was born. Not that you aren't more than enough for me, but…"
"It's okay Dad," Kate smiled softly, blinking back the veil of tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "I get it. I feel the same way."
"So, if you and Rick decide that he wants to spend a few days a week at his PI firm, or back in the precinct with you and your friends, I would be happy, more than happy, to be here with my granddaughter, while you two save the world."
Kate didn't bother to hide the tears that slipped from her eyes. "That means so much to me, Dad. To Rick too."
Her father reached out and brushed a tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb. "I know I haven't always been there for you, Katie. I haven't been the father you needed, but I want you to know I'm here now, for anything and everything. You, Rick, Lily, even Alexis and Martha, God help me," his mouth quirked in a half smile as Kate released a surprised laugh, "you mean everything to me."
Kate choked back a sob and launched herself across the sofa, into her father's arms, ignoring the irritated grunt her baby gave at being jostled. "I love you, Daddy."
"I love you too, Katie-bug," he held her tightly in his arms until the grunts of the now fidgeting infant became squawks of displeasure. Kate sighed and slipped out of her father's grasp.
"Well now," she smirked, rolling her eyes at the baby's antics, clearly inherited from her father's side of the family. "Are we not paying enough attention to you little miss?" Jim grinned and lifted Lily from his lap, setting her gently in Kate's arms. She laughed as the baby rooted towards her mother's breast, in search of her next meal. "I see you've inherited your father's appetite as well. Lucky me." Jim chuckled, and watched his daughter settle back into the sofa, covering the baby with a soft pink blanket. "Hold your horses, Ladybug, it's coming."
"I'm proud of you, Katie. You know that?"
"Thanks Dad," Kate hung her head shyly, her hair curtaining the pink staining her cheeks. "I'm not really sure what I'm doing, but it feels right, you know?"
Her dad nodded. "Welcome to parenthood. If you ever figure out what to do, let me know. The handbook didn't make its way to me."
Kate laughed, patting Lily's tiny bum when the girl grunted again, at the distraction of her mother's voice. "I think you're doing just fine. Right Lil?" She lifted her eyes from her daughter's face when her father stood up. "Are you leaving, Dad?"
"Nowhere better to be, than with my girls, today. Just thought I'd make us some lunch. You haven't eaten yet, have you?" He didn't wait for her to answer, just turned and strode purposefully toward the kitchen.
Kate leaned back against the cushions, turning her attention once again, to her baby daughter. Bright blue eyes blinked at her, as tiny fingers opened and closed against her breast, pinching and striking with the disjointedness of a newborn nervous system. She ran a finger across the silky slope of a cheek and watched her child nurse, once again overwhelmed by the inexplicable swell of love for the tiny girl. She was vaguely aware of the sounds of life coming from her kitchen, but she was too enraptured with the baby in her arms to take notice of much. The kiss on her head broke the spell, and she smiled as her husband appeared, crouching slowly beside the couch, his face alight with joy as he took in the sight before him. "Hi gorgeous girls. Did I miss anything exciting?"
"Hey," Kate sighed, resting her head against Castle's, still overcome with the emotion of the day. "Just sitting and thinking."
"Sounds painful," Castle quipped, running his fingers through her hair. "Care to share with the class?"
"Just…thank you," she sighed.
"What for?" Castle chuckled.
"Just…everything," Kate replied. "Our life, our family, Lily, putting up with me, and for calling my Dad this morning and asking him to come and babysit me." She looked up at him and quirked an eyebrow, amused.
"What?" Castle balked, eyes widening. "What are you talking about? Why would you…"
"Relax, Babe," she grinned softly. "I'm glad you did. It was…really good."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah," she assured him. "I feel peaceful now, you know. Like everything we worry about is just going to fall into place, and it will all be okay."
"Oh-kaaaay," he regarded her curiously. "That sounds cryptically deep for a quiet afternoon on the couch with the milk monster," he caressed his youngest daughter's cheek. "But I'm glad you had a good day." He kissed her gently, lips, the tip of her nose, and her forehead, before he groaned and lifted himself to his feet. "Your dad made a salad and some sandwiches. You hungry?"
"Yeah, I am," she slid her feet to the floor, and relaxed as Castle eased the baby from her arms, up to his broad shoulder. She adjusted her hoodie once again and stood, watching her husband bounce gently, whispering animatedly to their daughter, as he patted her back. "Hey, Castle?" He stopped bouncing momentarily, and smiled at his wife. "Thank you, I really do mean that."
"I know Kate," he leaned forward and kissed her softly, once again. "I'd give you the moon if I could."
She smiled and brought a hand up to caress his cheek. "I love you."
He grinned as their daughter released a loud belch, "I love you too. And apparently, frat baby here wants in on that action." Kate laughed and shook her head in amusement.
"You're such a weirdo. But I am seriously, starving, so if you don't get out of my way and let me eat, I may have to hurt you."
"Well we definitely don't want that, do we Ladybug?" He kissed Lily's tiny head, and held his hand out to his wife, tugging her gently to the kitchen. "Let's go see what your grandpa cooked up before Mommy gets mean."