An angsty story from way back when, my very first multi-chapter fic!
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
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1. This Is How I Will Forget You
I'm on the bus, and I'm tired.
Not just from work or school or life in general, but this… this distance that comes between us. It's already bad enough that we are so physically far apart, but do we have to be silent too? It's been too long since I'd last heard from you. Days, I could understand. Months, I might forgive. But years? Sure, I could make the first move to find out how you are, but I don't want to be the one always doing the work.
I'm on the way home, but I just want to get out of here. This is a route so familiar, so routine, yet suddenly it's become marked with so much sensitivity. Or maybe it's just me.
(Round the bend and down the street.)
As the bus trudges down the road, I know what's coming up. Maybe I should look upon that place in fondness, recalling the day I was found crying over the sourest of spilt milk (and the unworthiest of men). I may not have known it then, but as much as I was hurting, my heart had begun to heal too. Because you were with me.
But today, my heart is heavy. It seems to ache even more than usual. You are too far away and the distance has been killing me a little bit more each day. And things add up, you know. Every little thing I encounter that reminds me of you tears me apart that much more.
(We are getting closer.)
I stare straight ahead, my body stripped of emotions and strength. I'm tired, Yi Jeong. I wish it didn't have to come to this. THIS, whatever I'm doing to try to wean off you. It's not the best of ways, but I suppose it's a start.
And then, without as much as a glance, I close my eyes. I hold my breath. The bus sputters, but perseveres on. My heartbeat accelerates; I know we're here. This is the place I can't bear to look at. I could almost feel you in front of me again, your cockiness fading with each of my sobs. You were there to dry my tears. You aren't now. But I wish you were.
My eyes are closed and my face is wet; but with each tear, I have decided:
This is how I will forget you.