-1Title- O'Neill VS the Coffee Zombies.

Summery- Title says it all. This is my first fanfic.

Disclaimer-I don't own anything.. But the Coffee Zombies.

This is my first fan fiction. Came to me one day, when I missed my morning cup of Coffee. Set some time after Jack was promoted to general.

O'Neill VS the Coffee Zombies.

" What. Are. Those. Things?" Jack asked as he pointed at a group of airman who were all white and walking, check that, stumbling towards him.

"Them?" Daniel answered " Oh, they are the Coffee Zombies."

"Coffee Zombies?" Jack demanded " What the heck does that mean?"

" Coffee Zombies are everyone in the mountain who had a bad reaction the coffee you ordered. Due to the fact that it was decaff coffee instead of regular coffee, they all turned into zombies. " Daniel proclaimed. " I, however , had my own private stash. So, I didn't drink any of the decaff."

By this time the roving band of coffee deprived zombies had almost reached Jack and Daniel and were looking at them like they were big cups of regular coffee. " COFFEE! COFFEE!" the zombies groaned as they started to chase Jack and Daniel through the complex, stumbling and bumping into things as they went.

" What do you think we should do?" Jack yelled as they got chased through the gate room.

"Zat them?" Daniel suggested as he pulled a zat gun out of thin air and handed it to Jack. O'Neill turned around and started to fire at the group of crazed airman.. Again.. and Again.. But alas the zat gun had no effect.

Jack stared down at the zat in his hand in disbelief ." Was it just me or did the zat gun not work?" He yelled as he began to walk swiftly away again.

"Indeed." Teal'c replied.

"COFFEE...COFFEE!" The Zombies moaned again and again.

"Teal'c?" Jack exclaimed "Where did you come from? And where did Daniel go?"

Teal'c looked at him and then vanished in a puff of smoke. And where he had been Daniel was standing with a load of hand grenades.

"Huh?" That was all Jack could get out before Daniel threw all the grenades at him. " Here, Jack, try these."

Jack was confused but he took the grenades and threw them at the pursuing zombies.. There was a huge explosion and then...

Jack woke with a start to discover Daniel and Teal'c hovering over him. "Jack get up," Daniel said shaking him.

"Did you have to wake me up now?" Jack complained. " I just blew up the coffee zombies!"

Daniel and Teal'c looked at Jack and looked at each other. Daniel then cautiously asked, " Do we even want to know?"

Jack looked at the two of them. " Both of you get out of here!" he ordered. Settling down in his seat and putting his feet up on his desk, he said, " I will defeat you, Coffee Zombies!"

Standing outside Daniel looked at Teal'c and said " He did say Coffee Zombies, Right?"

Teal'c raised an eyebrow and replied, "Indeed"

FINISH

Read and review! I hope you liked it.

Bookworm1442.