All he ever wanted was to make him proud.
Everything he ever did was for Dean, the wrong and the good. He did because he thought it would help him, or aleast liberate him from the life.
But all it ever did is rain down distrust and mistakes.
He hid the pain of not truly being able to do something right.
He just wanted to be looked at by his big brother like something to be proud of.
But the more he thought about it the more it hurted, and the feeling just grew deeper.
Sammy woke up, a tear rolling down his cheek, his big brother was sitting at the table next to the motel door. The chock of waking up came on with a sigh, Dean looking down at him, to greet him morning.
``Sammy whats wrong?`` Dean softly asked once he saw Sam's sorrowful look.
He got up from his chair, to approach the bed in wich Moose was sleeping in.
``I'm sorry Dean...``
``Aaargh! don't start pulling crap like that now``
``I'm serious Dean!`` he said with is serious voice.
Dean just looked at him straight in the eyes once he broke the akward moment by taking Sam in a hug-ish way, ``Come on, get up`` he said lowly, putting Sam up on his feets.
Finally he hugged his brother thinking it would make things alright, but not matter how much he knew he cared, and how many time those simple hugs helped him, he didn't feel any different. Sam sat back down on the mattress, drowning in his own pain, and no one would ever know.
He loved his brother more than he ever should.