Harry blinked.

Where was he?

"HI HARRY!!" Dumbledore screamed in his face.

"AAAAHHH! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!" Harry screamed, not realizing it was the former headmaster. "Oh wait… hi, Professor."

"Hello yourself, you nitwit, you!" Dumbledore replied.

"Uhhh, if you don't mind me asking, what's going on?"

"You're dead!" Dumbledore replied cheerfully. "Tea?"

Harry found that Dumbledore was shoving a teacup in his face. "Uh, no thank you. What do you mean I'm dead?"

"How else can I put this…" Dumbledore set down his cup and looked thoughtful. "Deceased? No longer living? Ya kicked the bucket? I'm afraid I don't know what you're asking… biscuit?"

"No, I do not want a biscuit!" Harry said, slightly angrier this time. "Whadaya mean I'm dead? How did I die?"

Dumbledore put down his tea. "Geez, Harry, for my star ex-pupil, you're not very bright. Let's think this out, shall we? You were fighting the dark lord. You saw a flash of green light and heard the words, 'AVADA KADAVRA!' How do you think you died? Honestly, teenagers these days…" he put a biscuit in his mouth and chuckled.

"But I have to fight Voldemort!" Harry replied, on the verge of tears. "Something awful might happen!"

"Honestly Harry, you're pretty slow to catch on. You're dead… it's not your problem any more. When all the good people die, they'll come here and we'll all be reuinited. The bad guys can have the earth. We don't need it anymore. We have this place!" He gestured around the cottage they were having tea in.

"Um, it's lovely, professor, but- but what about Ginny? And Ron? And Hermione? And everyone else? What happens to them?"

"Well, they die. Then they show up and we all live happily ever after."

"Wow. I admit, this is much easier than fighting Voldemort."

"Now you're talking!"

"Is that tea offer still open?"

"'Course!" Dumbledore replied cheerfully. "Oh, and this'll make you happy. I read in the post this morning in the obituary section that Ginny, Ron, and Hermione will die heroically in battle. So they'll probably drop in some time this afternoon."

"Wow. Thanks, professor!" Harry replied, chomping down a biscuit.

The future looked bright, and the tea and biscuits were good. Now that's what Harry called a happy ending.