Two months ago, Feliciano Vargas took his life. He snapped and ended his own life in front of his family, friends, and enemies. Today we're going to take notice of how everything has been without North Italy.
Romano, Feli's brother, was in a great depression after watching his brother's suicide, but in order to maintain a healthy country, he continued to run his nation just as promised. However, he's much quieter now, and has lost some of his fiery temper. His hatred for the German brother Prussia is stronger than ever, but not his hatred for Ludwig. Actually, they've gotten along nicely since the loss, due to the bond they both shared with Feli. They were his protectors, and now they smile in memory of the ditzy boy they once sought to protect from evil.
Most nations have gone back to their everyday lives, not moved on, but are accepting the loss. Work is done and fun is had, but there is one difference in one person.
Feli's 'father', Austria.
Today, Hungary called upon a few other nations to come check on Austria. She had noticed a change in him since the accident-which she completely understood-, but this morning was the two month anniversary of his loss, and Roderich refused to leave the house. This worried her greatly, so now herself, Switzerland, Germany, and Prussia came to bring him out.
"Roderich, are you home? We are very worried about you and we'd appreciate it if you would come out." They had knocked on the door and now they were searching various rooms on the ground floor, searching for any signs of life. Suddenly, Prussia called out, "Guys, meet up, I got something." The four met at the front window of his home, and Germany stared, "Vhat is it, Bruder?" Gilbert pointed towards the direction he had come from, "Back in his music room, the curtains are drawn and the windows closed and locked. I hear him playing. Let's just go inside!" The Swiss nation nodded and took out his Swiss Army Pocketknife and picked the front door's lock, "Okay, we're good. Lead the way." Prussia pushed through and ran inside, and the sounds shocked every single one of them to the core.
Gibberish mumbles and violent playing was heard from inside the music room, the door blocking some of the sound clarity. Eliza began to panic, "Guys this isn't like him! He never plays like that." Germany shrugged, "He's just upset and suffering. I get it." Switzerland shook his head, "No, Beildschmidt. It's different this time. Curtains drawn, unclear mumbling, there's something else going on." Annoyed with everyone's 'scaredy cat' attitudes, Prussia waved his hand, "Just go inside guys! Gott!" He pulled open the door and his ruby eyes widened in horror. Eliza, Ludwig, and Vash pushed him out of the way, and every single one of them froze in fear. "OH MY GOTT, RODERICH!"
Crimson was staining the mahogany floor at the pianist feet, but that didn't matter to him. Nor did the blood coating the ivory keys of the piano as his injured fingers continued to violently bash out tragic chords. He didn't answer their call, though. He just kept playing as tears mixed with blood around him. The lullaby he had written for Feli and HRE as children sat in front of him, tear and crimson stained as he played it on repeat violently. The memories of his two children being ripped away from him at the will of no one…was overpowering him. The mumbled words heard through the door were clear now, "Posture straight, don't look around. Stay focused, no mistakes. Posture straight, don't look around. Stay focused, no mistakes."
In order to assure he stop his self-harm, Switzerland tackled him off of the bench and held him down. The Austrian flailed and screamed until he realized who had done it then growled, "Release me, Basch." Unafraid of the tone in the other man's voice-he was aware he was all bark, no bite-, the blonde did not move. Eliza was behind him with towels, and Ludwig was on the phone calling for an ambulance. Vash took the towels and held them at the bruised and bleeding fingers, "What the hell is wrong with you?! Do you really think we can take any more loss than we've received?! Roderich I know he was your son and I know you loved him but THIS IS NOT WHAT FELI WOULD HAVE WANTED! DO YOU NOT CARE THAT YOU WERE GOING TO LEAVE US BEHIND?!" Austria did nothing to reply, just laid limp and stared away from everyone else. Eliza's tears were running down, and Roderich turned to her, "Don't cry." A hand gently touched the brunette's cheek to turn him to the man above him, "If you care so much, why do this?"
"In the last two months I've thought more than I have ate, slept, or worked on my music combined. I've thought about life, my nation, my past, my kids. My kids are gone. My kids are dead. I'm never going to play them a lullaby again. There will never be anyone to call me daddy again. I will never tell someone "You're getting too big for this" because they're too tired to walk through the mall anymore. No more wild flowers brought to me because "I saw them on my walk Daddy and I thought you'd think they were pretty". It's gone; they're gone; I'm done. I'm not 'Daddy' or 'Papa' anymore. And that's more heartbreaking than you can /ever/ understand."
No one knew what to say or how to respond. This certainly wasn't the answer the others were expecting. Pain filled every one of their hearts in realization that this is truly how Austria felt. "Roderich…I'm so sorry. I don't know what to say…" The Austrian just shook his head, "You just don't understand, and that's fine. I've come to discover that no one will ever understand." Vash shook his head and bent down, "Roderich, I know you're suffering and you've just lost your son, but that does not mean you are alone. I swore to you all those years ago that I would always be there for you, and I still haven't given up on that. You meant everything to me at one time, and I do miss you. Very much."
Roderich, along with everyone else in the room, stared in shock at the Swiss man's words. Everyone secretly knew that Austria and Switzerland had some form of history together, but no one knew in what context. Inside Eliza's mind there were sirens and squealing fangirl thoughts. "Basch, I…I…miss you too. I hate how we…" "Yeah, me too Roderich. Me too." The two stared at each other for a while until Prussia called out, "Okay Kiddos can you stop having some probably awesome eye sex and get up so we can clean Roddy's hands?" They both turned and glared at the Prussian man, but stood nonetheless. Roderich was dragged to the kitchen and his hands were held over the sink as Elizabeta cleaned them-Gilbert, Ludwig, and Vash cleaned the music room. "So, care to discuss yours and Vash's history?"
"It's rather complicated."
"Do tell anyway."
With an exasperated sigh, Roderich made sure they weren't coming and began to think, "As children Basch and I were inseparable. We were uncontrollable, emotional, whining little brats when apart for longer than a few hours. Because of our attitudes, we got the 'gay speech' at least five times to make sure we understood. And at first, it wasn't anything romantic. Basch was my protector, my best friend, my savior practically. But then we got older it turned more romantic. I developed an even bigger crush on him and it eventually evolved into love. We were by all means a couple I suppose, although we never really talked about it. It was an unspoken thing. We would tell each other how we felt, display affection, everything. There just wasn't a label, and then bosses began getting involved in our lives. We were ordered to stop seeing each other and they did everything in their power to keep us apart. They even ordered me to marry Antonio, but that still didn't stop us. We wrote constantly and would sneak away from everything in the middle of the night to see each other. Eventually we grew apart because our lives were unwillingly changing, and I lost my loving hero. It was heart breaking, and I never devoted myself to any of my marriages because of this…no offense to you of course Eliza…"
Eliza placed her hand on her heart, "That's so romantic and sweet! I wish you hadn't lost it. And by no means do I take offense. I personally wasn't happy with the idea of marriage in general, but living with you, Feli, and Otto was wonderful." They both smiled and she pulled him away, "Alright I believe your hands are clean and safe. Don't ever scare us like that again." He nodded and pulled her into a hug, holding her against his chest. She could feel him start to cry and rubbed his back, rocking him softly as his head fell and rested on top of hers. "Oh Roderich, shh…everything's going to be okay…do you want Vash?" He chuckled, making her laugh back, unaware that the blonde was at the entrance of the kitchen watching. He had been listening in since the beginning and had to bite back tears as memories flooded through him again. He snuck over to the two and smiled at Eliza, "The music room is cleaner than ever." She smiled and nodded as Roderich straightened his glasses, "Thank you all for everything. It means a lot to know you care."
"Of course, Roderich. We love you." Eliza smiled and ruffled the musician's hair, and Vash took a deep breath, "Some of us never stopped." The room went silent at the last remark, which everyone heard. Vash blushed at his confession and moved to leave, "I must go home to Lilli. Call me soon, Roderich. I need to know you're alright." They shared one last glance while Ludwig and Gilbert snuck out the door, not wanting to be a part of this. They both knew that something was going to spark between them sometime anyway. Vash smiled and touched the musician's cheek, "Take care of yourself or I'll sick Eliza on you." Roderich nodded and off Vash left, leaving the male alone with Elizabeta. "Don't get any ideas now Woman. If anything happens you'll be the first to know." But, instead of saying anything, she grabbed her things and hugged him one last time. Then, placed a phone in his hand,
"Give Vash a couple hours before you call him. You don't want to seem that desperate, even if you are."