A/N: A lot of people wanted 'hearts a mess' to continue and I thought it would be too forced to just throw another few chapters in, because I had really meant to end it where I did. This takes place a few months after that one ended. A warning that Blair is involved with an OC, but after the last story she deserves some affection! I know you probably won't want to read their sex scenes, but it will be clear that Dan still invades her thoughts often. I know I keep starting new projects and that's probably annoying but I am just on an inspiration kick right now so I figured I'd post this stuff.
xo Gia
Dan sits at the bar and swirls his drink, pensive. Serena left for Barcelona and it didn't tear a massive hole in him the way he thought it might. Perhaps it was because his thoughts were elsewhere. His heart was elsewhere.
Blair said she needed time, that she felt like she couldn't trust him for trying to steal the position, that she was still crushed by him consistently choosing Serena over her in the past year. They were best friends and now they're just both existing in each other's lives. He has dreams about her, in the throws of passion, his body getting tangled in his sheets. He hasn't slept with another girl since New Years Eve.
For someone who tried so hard to avoid loneliness, he did a terrible job.
"How's it going, man?" Nate squeezes his shoulder gently and slides into the stool next to him. His eyes are sympathetic. Nate has somehow filled Blair's role as the only person Dan can count on these days.
Dan glances up at his friend, smiling. "The New Yorker took me on as an intern. Better late than never, right?"
"It's definitely a better fit for you than W was."
Nate orders a beer and they casually talk about work for awhile, meaning that Dan talks about work and Nate talks about which Senator's daughter he's been screwing recently. They both skate around the subject of the beautiful brunette who neither of them can seem to shake.
"Have you heard from her?" Dan asks, regretting the words as soon as they leave his mouth.
"We still talk a lot," he nods, taking a gulp of beer. "She seems happy. We're supposed to do some double date thing on Friday."
Dan's brow wrinkles in confusion. "Are you her date?"
"Nah," Nate laughs, "Her boyfriend Walt is coming, and I'm bringing Alice."
Dan feels his fists clench involuntarily under the bar when he hears the word boyfriend associated with Blair. He had no idea she was even dating anyone. So much for needing time to figure things out.
"Who the fuck is Walt?"
Nate's eyes widen, realizing he's said too much. "Dude, it's not a big deal. He's this English guy she met when she was in France over the holidays. He's in New York doing business for a few months so they've been seeing each other."
Dan rolls his eyes because Blair would choose a fucking Englishman of all people to start dating, especially after he tried to tell her he loved her. It must give her so much satisfaction to know she blew him off to date a guy with such a sophisticated name and an even more sophisticated accent. He hates that it makes him angry, but then he realizes this is probably what Blair felt all the time when he was with Serena.
xoxo
Blair giggles as she stands on the mattress and Walt grabs an ankle, yanking her legs out from under her. He props up on an elbow and grins at her, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to her lips. Blair ruffles his unruly blonde hair.
"Can I ask you something?" He asks, playing with the hem of her skirt distractedly.
Blair sits up a little and smiles. "Go ahead."
"Why is it that I've been here for two months and have yet to meet any of your friends?"
Her heart beats a little faster at the question as she tries to formulate an excuse, "You've met Epperly. And to be fair you're meeting Nate on Friday."
"Is Epperly actually your friend?" His head cocks to the side playfully, "She's rather a proper bitch if you ask me. And if I recall, I just about had to force you into inviting Nate and his girl to dinner."
Blair laughs and throws her head back into the pillow. "Your point?"
Walt follows her movements, sliding up the bed and letting his fingers trail the waistline of her underwear. Her breath hitches.
"My point is; What do you do in New York when I'm not here?"
She meets his teasing blue eyes and laughs a little more breathily as his fingers dip into the front of her panties. His middle finger slides along her clit gently and Blair grips a handful of sheets for control.
She had spent so much of her adulthood pining after that moron Dan Humphrey, that she had no idea what sort of things other men were capable of making her feel. It wasn't that she still had feelings for Dan, of course not. She just wasn't ready to let her happy bubble with Walt collide with her old world, a world that she was trying to rebuild.
Dan was so determined to prove that he was in love with her, and yet she couldn't stop thinking that things would be different had Serena not left New York. She feared Dan's loneliness had gotten the best of him.
Walt slips a finger inside of her and Blair moans against his ear, feeling her pulse race. He slides another finger in, but keeps his thumb pressed against her clit and Blair finds herself lifting her hips for friction.
"Fuck me," she mutters, and for a moment, imagines saying the same thing to Dan, catching him off guard and seeing the way his eyes darken with desire. He wouldn't really have a choice in the matter.
Walt pulls his boxer briefs off and hovers over her, taking in her appearance before entering her roughly. He props himself up and hooks one of her legs over his arm as he picks up speed.
Blair grips the headboard when she comes.
xoxo
Dan doesn't know what time he gets to the penthouse, all he knows is that he is way too drunk to be there. He leans on the table in the foyer and Dorota rushes upstairs to fetch Blair from her bedroom. She pads downstairs in her crimson silk robe, tightening it around her waist when she sees him.
"I told you I need time," she whispers harshly, shoving him lightly.
Dan ignores her push and steps closer to her, taking in her big brown eyes. "Who is Walt?"
Blair's eyes soften at his name, which frustrates Dan even more. "It's none of your concern, Humphrey."
"It is," he slurs. His hand reaches for her waist and pulls her closer to him, "I tried to tell you that I love you that night."
Her breath catches as she stares up at him, making no effort to push him away. Dan wants to kiss her, but the sad thing is he has no idea how to do that right now. He's practically frozen in place.
"What convenient timing," she says softly.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
Blair sighs, looking down. Her body is still pressed against his. "You move on quickly. I thought Serena was your destiny, or something cryptic like that."
Dan lets go of her and takes a step back, hurt by her words.
"I don't have a destiny," he says, quiet. "I have you."
Blair moves away from him and shakes her head. Her eyes are rimmed with tears. He never thought this is what they would become.
"You don't have me, Dan. You did," she sighs exhaustedly, "and you didn't care."
Dan wants to wrap her up in his arms, to tell her that he's an idiot. He could never see what was standing right in front of him. He'd let Serena dangerously consume him when the person he wanted had been by his side since freshman year of college, never forcing her way into his life or torturing him into loving her. She was his best friend, and then she wasn't anymore.
"Remember last time I was here?" he asks, mostly to break up the tension. "I'd told you that I wanted to be happy. Blair, you make me happy. I think I can make you happy too."
Her eyes flutter shut and Dan thinks he can see the hint of a smile forming on her lips, but then she catches herself, shaking her head again.
"I'm already happy."
He takes a deep breath, not quite ready to give up. He moves closer to her again, his hand tilting her chin up to meet his eyes. She swallows and Dan thinks that she looks very vulnerable in that moment. It's beautiful.
"Only say 'no' if you really don't want to be with me," he says softly, keeping his eyes locked with hers.
"No."
When she says the word, Dan feels defeated. He nods, conceding, and makes his way back to the elevator. Feeling his heart clench as the doors shut and she's not standing next to him. He thinks of the time she made him watch Downton Abbey with her, and the same dialogue keeps running through his head in circles.
We're cursed, you and I, and there's nothing to be done about it. Let's be strong, Mary. Let's be strong and accept that this is the end.
Of course it's the end. How could it not be?