Title: Where Dark Things Sleep
Author: Trialia
Fandom: The Hobbit / 'Where The Shadows Lie' by EmilianaDarling
Character(s): Bilbo Baggins, Thorin Oakenshield, off-screen mentions of Dís, Fíli, Kíli, Balin, Dwalin
Pairing(s): Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Rating: M
Word Count: 603
Warning(s): Character death, on & off-screen, talk of murder & suicide – this is a VERY DARK fic, in which Thorin has been taken over by the One Ring. Be aware of that.
Notes: A fannish sequel to EmilianaDarling's fic 'On His Dark Throne'. If you've not read that, please find it and do so before you read this or my fic won't make a lot of sense. Be sure to read the warnings - this is the darkest thing I've posted yet and it's likely to be very triggering. There may or may not be another, lighter chapter, but don't count on it.
Summary: Bilbo has ruined his beloved by accident, and Thorin has ruled and wrecked his world with the Ring in hand, yet knows not what he's become. Death is the only way out.
He must know it is up to him, and him alone, to end this. It is the only thing he really knows for sure any more, that this is his fault - painfully, terribly, choking his every breath with misery, reminding him of all that has happened since he was so careless as to start it - and his responsibility.
No one else will ever get close enough. Even Balin - poor, dear, loyal Balin and Dwalin, the old Thorin would have died rather than destroy them as he has - could not accomplish it. In the end, Bilbo is the only one who will ever be able to pull it off.
He doesn't want to live without Thorin, and the real Thorin has been gone since he first touched the Ring, but Bilbo's treacherous heart still insists on suffering for him. But the only way to fix this - well, there is no way to fix this.
Death is the only way out.
The King will never stop the destruction the Ring has driven him to cause, a new dark Lord for the ages, unless someone stops him. It makes Bilbo sick to the stomach to even think of losing Thorin, but if he were to do something that would result in both their deaths...He would never have to live without Thorin, twisted facsimile of his beloved or not, and he would not have to live with having left the rest of the world to their fate under a ruler he caused to be so dangerous.
Thorin's guards would only kill him anyway, if he were to kill Thorin and not himself, of that he's grimly certain. He doesn't let himself think that they might be grateful. But Fíli or Dís might order them not to kill him, and to live without Thorin...he cannot bear the thought of it. No matter how different this may be from the life he had long hoped would be theirs.
That life will never be possible again - too much irreparable damage has been done, and even were Thorin to somehow emerge from under the thrall of the Ring, he would wish for death in hearing he had killed his dearest friends and the One of his beloved youngest nephew, elf or not, whether or not he remembered what he'd done. There would be no way to keep him from finding out, after all that.
Bilbo cannot let him be conscious of what he has done. He cannot hurt Thorin so, even now, when Thorin has hurt so many others and Bilbo just barely remembers how tender he used to be back when he was truly himself. That's part of the problem: Bilbo loves him too much to refuse him anything, and that is what brought them here. What got them into this mess. He could not refuse his own life-
No, he cannot live without Thorin, and he would not wish to try. Possibilities run through his mind, calm and simple, and he understands what he has to do next. But he must not allow anyone else into this. Too many have already been harmed by his mistakes.
He cannot write his will, but he does not believe he deserves one after all he has done.
This will make his amends to the living...and perhaps he can make amends to Thorin, too, in the next life. If they are both so lucky.
He has killed for love before...but he never, never thought the person he would have to kill would be his beloved.
Oh, my dear, my dearest. We cannot keep living this way. I'm so sorry.