2004
Young Mother Series Book 1
Written by:
Kelsey
Caren Capp was almost sixteen when she met the man of her dreams - Tyrell Hawkins. Tyrell Hawkins was smart, tall, and very handsome. The only thing that he lacked was religion. He claimed to be a Christian, but really didn't care much about God or Jesus.
Tyrell is an adventurous 18 year-old boy. He likes to go out and try new and daring things. The only problem with that is. . .Caren doesn't realize how adventurous he actually is!
She caught in his smooth talking and finds herself in love. Before she knows it, she's made the biggest mistake in her life. Even though her strict parents forbid her from seeing the young troublemaker, she disobeyed them.
What should Caren do now? Her parents are angry with her, but they do not know her biggest secret. Can she tell them? What happens when the next biggest shock comes out?
Chapter 1
Tyrell Hawkins
Caren opened her high school locker and got out her books for the morning periods. She was never excited for the school day to begin, especially since she was different. Caren was not very well-liked, for she was a Charity Christians.
Charity Christians wore head coverings, long dresses, and were taught to be very proper and modest. These were not the traits of her fellow classmates.
"Hey look, there's that Amish girl again" she heard a guy snicker to his friend.
Tyrell Hawkins stared at her. "She's kinda pretty, don't you think?" he asked, eyeing Caren closely.
"Are you kidding me? You can't even see her legs in that long sheet!" he exclaimed.
Perfect target, Tyrell thought to himself. A very modest and discreet girl will be perfect. She won't have a clue what's going on. He walked up to her and tapped her shoulder.
She turned to see the cutest smiling teenager at her school. His big muscles were showing through his T-shirt. The dirty blond hair on his head was cut short and nice looking. He also had these amazing blue-green eyes that stood out against his tan skin.
"Hello, my name is Tyrell Hawkins," he introduced with a flirtatious grin.
Caren nodded. "Nice to meet you," she said in return, preparing to leave for her first class.
He placed a hand in front of her. "Don't go so quickly. Isn't it kinda rude to leave me in the dust like this?"
Caren stared at him. He actually wants to talk to me? she asked herself. "Well, I guess so. What class are you headed to?"
"Gym class. You're in the tenth grade, right?" He didn't seem to think she would be babyish or anything if she was, so she wasn't afraid to reply.
"That's right. I'll be turning sixteen in a short while." She smiled nervously. "I'm sorry, but I really must go. I don't want to get a strike." She hurried away, face flushed.
Tyrell turned to his friend Kyle with a sneaky smile. "Well well well, looks like I've got the perfect one," he sighed.
"Dude, are you seriously gonna use her? I mean, there are so many more willing girls."
Tyrell nodded. "No other girl would work for what I'm doing." With that, he walked off.
All during class, Caren thought about Tyrell. He was so different from the other boys. Most of them thought of her as nerdy and dumb. Tyrell treated her with respect.
Her heart pounded. Did she have a crush on someone? It was usually discouraged in her church to have a beau at such a young age, though her father may let her when she was at least sixteen.
"Caren, get out your homework," the teacher said. "Keep your mind on your work, not whatever it is you're thinking about."
Caren blushed and quickly got out her math assignment. Ugh, algebra, she thought as the teacher told the students the right answers.
At lunch, Caren usually sat alone. She was slowly nibbling on her sandwich when a dark shadow hovered over her. She looked up to see Tyrell's bright eyes shining above her.
"Mind if I sit here?" he asked, smiling broadly.
"No, go ahead." She kept her eyes on her food. For some reason, she couldn't look at him.
"You are very pretty," he told her. "That blond hair of yours really makes you look pretty."
Caren smiled awkwardly. "Thank you," she stuttered quietly.
"Would you like to meet me after school at Larry's?" he wondered, voice so deep and manly.
Caren's mind raced. Did she have any plans with her family tonight? "Um, I'll have to talk to my dad first," she replied.
"That's fine. You do that, then let me know if you can." He handed her a slip of paper. "That's my cell number."
Caren took it into her hand. "T-thank you." She gave him a quick smile before continuing to eat.
"No problem," he sighed, taking a sip of his soda. "No problem at all."
Chapter 2
A "Date" With Tyrell
Caren slammed the front door shut excitedly and hurried into the living room. "Papa, Papa!" she called.
"What is it darlin'?" her father asked.
"Caren's sweet on someone," Caroline sang as she entered the room. Caroline was Caren's twin sister.
"Caroline!" Caren gasped, face flushed. "Papa, this boy at school asked to meet me at Larry's Pizza today. May I go?"
Papa thought about it for a while. "Well, do you promise to behave yourself?" he asked.
"Oh yes Papa, I promise I will!" she exclaimed, jumping up and down.
"Then you may go. Have fun and stay safe."
Caren planted a kiss on her father's cheek before running to the kitchen phone to call Tyrell.
"Hello, Tyrell," he greeted casually.
"Hi, this is Caren. Papa said I may meet you there."
"Great! See you at five!" He hung up the phone and smiled. "Perfect. . ."
At five until five, Caren opened the restaurant's door. She stepped inside and peered about. Her heart leapt when she caught a glimpse of Tyrell. Slowly, she made her way to their table.
"There you are!" he exclaimed, smiling a manly and cool smile.
"Here I am," she chuckled nervously.
"I'm glad you could come." He handed her a menu, then took one for himself.
"Yeah, me too," she sighed. "Why'd you invite me, if you don't mind my asking?"
"To get to know you better. Your pretty looks caught my eye." He smiled at her. "What do we want to eat? The Larry's special?"
She nodded. "That sounds nice," she commented, keeping her voice quiet and ladylike.
"Waitress!" Tyrell called, not caring that you weren't supposed to call them over.
A pretty young brunette came strolling over, a bright smile on her face. "What can I get you?" she asked, pencil ready.
A lot of things, Tyrell thought to himself, looking over her curves. "Uh well, we'd like the Larry's special," he replied, face a little red.
"What kind of soda?"
Tyrell glanced at Caren. "What kind of soda do you like?" he inquired.
Caren gave him a shy smile. "I like Mountain Dew," she answered sheepishly.
"Mountain Dew, please."
"Anything else?" the waitress asked in her perky voice.
"Nope, that'll be everything."
"Okay." She hurried off.
"So Caren, what religion are you that you dress the way you do?" he questioned.
Caren cleared her throat, then said, "Well, I'm a Christian. A Charity Christian, that is. I believe in dressing modestly and wearing the head covering."
"Alright."
"What religion are you?"
Tyrell grew nervous. He didn't really have a religion. He couldn't say Charity Christian, for she'd know better. "Um, I don't really have one."
"I see." She bit her lip nervously. Maybe I can help change that. I just can't let Papa know, or he'll really be mad that I went out with a non-religious person for supper!
"So, do you have any siblings?" Duh, of course she does! Her kind of people have a billion in a lifetime!
Caren grinned. "Well yes, a twin sister," she told him. "She isn't around seniors very much. I guess she just stays in the less-advanced class halls."
"She your only sibling?"
"Yes, Mamma and Papa couldn't have any more children after us." She touched her own stomach. Someday, hopefully, she'd have a little child growing in there. She could hardly wait.
"Do you plan to have many children?" He stared at her with those bright eyes of his.
She shrugged. "I do want at least one child. I'm not really a big family type of person."
"Me neither." He sighed. "Do you like football?"
She shook her head. "Sports are basically a waist of time to me," she informed.
"Oh," he breathed, feeling awkward. Sports are my life, basically. Sports and chicks.
"There comes our food," Caren announced, changing the subject.
Tyrell smiled. "Thank you," he said to the waitress before she left.
After about an hour of talking and eating, Caren felt something special for this guy. He was cute, funny, and seemed to be a really sweet person.
Laying in bed that night, all Caren could think of was him. Does Tyrell actually like me the way he seems to? Could he be the one?
Chapter 3
Jealous Of My Sister
About a month after Tyrell and Caren's "date", Caren's dream came true.
Tyrell was sitting in their living room, Caren beside him. Caroline was sitting in a chair reading her Bible, every once in a while looking up to see what they were doing.
Tyrell grabbed Caren's hands and held them. "Caren, I've been feeling something special between us since we've met," he said, looking deeply into her eyes. "Will you be my girlfriend?"
Caroline looked up from her Bible, eyes wide. Of all things, he's asking her! What about a decent talk with Papa before consulting the female? She stared at the handsome young man. How lucky is Caren, having him as a beau, if she accepts him?
Caren gasped. "Oh Tyrell, I would be honored!" she exclaimed, eyes shining. "I've never had a boyfriend before."
"Aren't supposed to have one right now either," Caroline mumbled.
"Caroline, stop being a scrooge. Papa knows what a nice gentleman Tyrell is." She gave her beau a reassuring smile.
Tyrell stood up. "Come on Caren, let's go for a walk." He grabbed her hand and lead her out the door.
Caroline ran over to the window and watched them until they disappeared. "Why must she have all the luck? We look exactly alike, so he can't like her more for her looks." A sudden solution popped into her mind. "Is she doing things with him he knows I'd never do?" The thought scared her.
Caren felt so lucky holding the adorable man's hand as they walked down the old country road. She couldn't be more happy than this moment, at least she thought she couldn't.
After about two hours of being out, they decided to head back. "Caren, you look very beautiful in pink," Tyrell told her, looking at her plain pink cape dress.
"Thank you." Her voice was gracious and womanly - something she absolutely loved.
"Sometime, you should try pants." He looked at her dress-covered legs. "I bet you'd look nice in some."
Caren flushed. "Perhaps" was all she said. The compliments were making her over-joyful.
Tyrell smiled. He enjoyed seeing Caren flushed with pleasure.
"Tyrell, would you mind taking me to church this coming Sunday?" she said suddenly.
Tyrell thought a moment. Drastic calls call for drastic measures, he thought to himself. "Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt," he decided.
Caren jumped up and wrapped her thin arms around his neck. "Oh thank you!" she cried, almost ready to kiss his lips.
Tyrell patted her small back, smiling naughtily. "No problem, Caren. No problem."
"So, what's it like being courted by a man outside the church?" Caroline asked her sister as they prepared for bed.
"I don't know, I've never been courted by anyone before." She pulled off her bloomers, then picked up her nightgown. "Tyrell's taking me to church on Sunday."
Caroline huffed. "Well, I don't know about you, but I wouldn't want such a man at our church," she sneered.
"Anyone's welcome at church! Besides, don't you want to help those who don't have Christ in their hearts?" Caren pulled a hairpin out of her hair. "Haven't you been listening to Papa for the past fifteen years?"
Caroline scowled. "Of course I have!" she protested. Her arms were crossed, and her face was fierce. "How dare you say such a thing to me!"
"Girls, quiet or Papa's comin' up there!" their father threatened.
Caren shut up. She hated getting Papa upset with her. Although she was almost sixteen, he still gave out whippings and spankings to his daughters. They were used to them, so it didn't seem unusual. Most parents within the church spanked their children as discipline.
Caroline slammed down her hairbrush. "I do wish Papa wouldn't threaten such things to almost-women!" she sighed.
"Behave Caroline, Papa's probably still listening to us."
Caroline crawled into bed, still angry over Tyrell taking Caren to church on Sunday.
That Sunday, Tyrell pulled up to the Capps' house. He honked his horn excitedly.
Caren ran out, her long dress flapping in the wind. Quickly, she hopped into the passenger's seat. "Bye Papa, see ya at church!" she called out the window, waving.
Tyrell pulled out of their driveway and drove down Blueberry Lane. "So, where do you go to church?"
"Penns Creek community Center - Charity Christian Fellowship," she replied, smiling sweetly. "It really is a nice church."
Probably some dictating church like the Amish, he thought to himself. Kinda like a cult. I guess. "That's good, wouldn't want to go to a mean church," he chuckled.
"Tyrell, what is your family's religious background?" she asked suddenly.
"I donno. I guess we don't really have any. I don't have a religion and neither does my family." He gulped. I'm getting annoyed with the religion questions.
"Do you think they'd mind that you're going to a church?"
"No, probably not." They don't give a shit about anything else I do.
"Oh okay." She sighed. Was she maybe hammering him with very personal questions? Why did she always have to take after Papa?
When they finally arrived, Tyrell was feeling uneasy. What would these people say to him? Would they like him? Would they try to suck him into their beliefs?
Hand in hand, they walked over to the church and inside. They strolled down a long hall, then finally opened the door to the church room - which was originally a gym.
"Where do you usually sit?" Tyrell wondered, wanting to sit down.
She pointed to the front row. "Right up there. You may go there a while, I'm gonna speak to some friends 'til church begins."
Tyrell slowly went up there, then sat down. "So, that's how it is, huh? You leave me here without anyone to talk to while you go? Ugh!" he mumbled to himself.
Paulson Capp came into the room, his gracious wife on his arm. Elaine smiled sweetly as they made their way up to Tyrell. Her bright blue eyes shined with pleasure when she saw how well-kept Tyrell looked.
"Good morning and God bless," she greeted, bending down to hug him.
"Good morning Mrs. Capp," he returned uncomfortably.
"Good morning Tyrell," Paulson said, extending his hand.
Tyrell shook it firmly and smiled. "When does church begin?" he wondered, looking up at the clock.
"Usually around nine-thirty," Paulson explained. "We always like to talk before service begins."
Tyrell nodded knowingly. "So I've noticed." He rolled his eyes. These people seem unreal with how joyful they are.
Paul then sauntered over to a group of men and began speaking with them. Each time, he greeted them with a hug and "brotherly kiss."
"How odd," Tyrell whispered, watching Paul. "Glad he ain't my father."
Elaine turned to Tyrell, a bright smile on her face. "So Tyrell, what do you think of the church so far?" she asked.
Tyrell didn't know what to say. He would've told her the truth, but he didn't want to hurt his girlfriend. "Well, uh, it's very different from what I'm used to."
She smiled broadly. "Yes, it is, isn't it? We are all so much more friendly than other people."
Other people? They are people just the same as you. Why do you think of my kind as "other people?" You are the "other people!" He gave her a fake smile. "Maybe."
"Oh look, there's Dolly!" Elaine exclaimed, pointing to a couple about her and Paul's age. "Dolly, I have someone for you to meet!"
Tyrell smacked his forehead with his hand. "Great more," he whispered, shaking his head.
Dolly gave lumbering over with her petite husband. "Oh, who's this?" she cooed, voice surprising Tyrell.
Elaine had such a soft and sweet voice, and this Dolly person had a man's voice! Where in the world did that come from?
"My name is Tyrell Hawkins - Caren Capp's boyfriend," he replied, nervously holding his hand out to her.
She shook it heartily. "Oh, so I see Caren is dating outside the chuch," she mumbled under her breath.
Tyrell hardened. "Anything wrong with that?" he demanded, voice rising.
She shook her head. "No, no. It's just very uncommon."
Tyrell looked at her little husband hiding behind her. He looked about five feet tall, while she was a big six-footer. The man was shy and probably not very outgoing.
Tyrell nodded to him with a smile.
The man shrunk back, face afraid.
Confusion was written all over Tyrell's face. What could make him so afraid of me? Is he always so afraid of everyone?
Caren came running up just then, a smile on her young face. "How are you doing, Tyrell?" she asked.
Tyrell shrugged. "Alright I guess." He sighed. "A little overwhelmed."
She laughed. "That's alright." She sat down beside him and held his hand.
Caroline glared ruefully at her sister. She had a boyfriend, and a cute one too. Why couldn't she ever get that lucky?
Tyrell took Caren home after church and stayed in the barn a little bit to wait for her father. Caren had said he wanted to talk to Tyrell privately when church was over.
Caroline came in to feed her horse. She smiled nervously at Tyrell, then resumed her work.
"Hi," Tyrell greeted. "Whatcha doin'?"
"Just feeding star, that's all," she replied meekly.
He walked up to her and placed a manly hand on her shoulder. "Let's talk," he said, grinning.
A feeling of excitement flooded over Caroline just then. "Okay," she breathed.
They stared into each other's eyes, then it happened. Tyrell titled her back and kissed her passionately in the barn.
When they pulled away, Caroline was shocked. "What about my sis-" Tyrell pressed his index finger to her lips. "Shh, it'll be our secret."
Chapter 4
Sweet Sixteen
School ended soon and June was creeping along. On June tenth was Caren and Caroline Capp's birthday.
Caren excitedly brushed her knee-length blonde hair early in the morning. She brushed and brushed until every little knot was out. Finally, she twisted it into as flat a bun as she could make, then placed her prayer veiling on her head.
Caroline was slower with her thicker yet shorter blond hair. Her hair was only a little higher than her waist.
Caren laughed. "You surely do have a time with that rat's nest of your's," she chuckled, straightening her veiling.
Caroline scowled. "Well at least I don't look like I have a bee hive on the back of my head!" she barked, twisting her hair into an ugly bun.
"Girls, stop your snitchin', or I'll take a belt to ya!" Paulson called from below the stairs.
Caren and Caroline quieted. A threat from Papa was enough to make them behave.
Caren walked gracefully down the steps and flew into the kitchen. "Good morning Papa, Mamma," she greeted.
Elaine smiled from the kitchen stove. "Good morning birthday girl," she greeted in return. "Your favorite is pancakes with scrambled eggs and bacon, right?"
Caren nodded. "You got it right." She turned to Paulson. "Papa, may I invite Tyrell over for my birthday supper?"
Just then, the phone rang.
Paulson got up from the table and answered. "Hello," he said in his low, mumbling voice.
"Hello, is Caren Capp there?" a man's voice asked.
"Yes, yes she is. Who's calling?"
"Her boyfriend, Tyrell Hawkins" came the response.
Paulson held out the phone. "Caren, Tyrell Hawkins is on the phone," he mumbled, face not too happy.
Caren jumped up and ran to the phone. "Hello?" she said excitedly. "Yes. Thank you. Um, let me ask." She turned to Paulson. "Papa, he invited me out to eat with him for supper. He said it was a special dinner for my birthday."
Paulson frowned. "Caren, you know you always spend your birthday with your family," he reminded.
Caren stomped her foot. "But Papa, it's my sixteenth birthday! You only turn sixteen once in your life!"
Paulson's expression softened. "Alright, you may go. But on one condition."
"What's that, Papa?"
"You must be back by nine."
"I will Papa, I promise!" She talked a little more to Tyrell, then hung up the phone.
"You are a woman now," Tyrell told her at China House Buffet.
Caren laughed. "Hardly, I'm only sixteen. I have two more years to go."
"But you are a woman to me."
She blushed. "Well, if you say so."
He smiled. "That's my girl. Now, how about I go get you some ice cream?"
"Sounds good, thank you Tyrell."
He got up and marched over to the ice cream. When he tried to turn the machine off, the ice cream just kept running. "Uh, turn off!" he shouted, still holding the dish under it to collect all the ice cream. "Stupid thing!" He pounded it with his fist. "Turn off!"
The ice cream rolled out even faster, now spilling onto the floor.
Caren looked back and saw her handsome date acting so silly by yelling at the machine. She had picked a winner, she was sure.
A Chinese worker came over and stopped the machine, then gave Tyrell a stupid look. "You do not know how to use ice cream?" he asked.
Tyrell gave a weak smile. "Uh, I don't use 'em to often."
The man walked away, shaking his head and mumbling something in Chinese as he went.
Tyrell returned with a big dish of vanilla ice cream. "Here you go," he said, placing it before her.
Caren laughed. "Thank you, so much Tyrell." She took some of the ice cream on her finger and wiped it on his nose.
Tyrell tried to get his tongue to lick his nose, but it was impossible. Tyrell was usually the type of man who liked to be a clown, yet also the slick and cool guy.
Caren sat up and licked his nose with her tongue. "There, all gone," she sighed, eyes gazing deep into his. "You have such beautiful eyes."
Tyrell held her gaze. Slowly, their heads moved forward, ending in a powerful kiss.
When Caren finally pulled away, everyone was looking at them and smiling. Her face was red, but her eyes were lit up with excitement.
Tyrell laughed. "Well, I guess we got everyone's attention."
She nodded. "Seems to be that way."
Caren snuck inside the house at ten. She tiptoed up the stairs and opened her bedroom door. She jumped back in surprise to see her father standing right there.
"In!" he ordered.
She obeyed.
"Where in the world were you?" he demanded, face red with anger.
"At Tyrell's."
"Tyrell's? You were supposed to be home at nine! What were you doing there?"
She lowered her head. "Kissing," she replied weakly.
"Kissing?" he yelled. "You are not to see him anymore. I hear he is a scoundrel and a player!"
Caren cried. "Papa, please, we did nothing wrong!" she cried.
"Caren, over Papa's lap." He forced her over and whipped her with his belt. He did it ten times, then threw her into her bed. "You are not to come out of your room tomorrow."
Caroline smiled. Maybe tomorrow was her perfect opportunity to see Tyrell again.
Chapter 5
Caroline's Secret
The next day, Caroline arrived at Tyrell's house around one in the afternoon. She wanted a little of what her sister had gotten.
Tyrell took her up into his room. "Let's make-out on my bed," he said, jumping onto it.
She sat down, the began kissing his lips and giving him hickeys. "Oh Tyrell, won't you break-up with my sister and go for me?" she moaned.
"No, I love you both." He unbuttoned her dress. "It's hot in here," he explained.
Caroline pushed him away. "I'm not comfortable with this," she told him. "I'm afraid I must leave."
He grabbed her dress and pulled her back onto the bed. "You will stay with me!" he yelled, the vein popping out of her forehead.
Caroline's eyes watered. "Tyrell, please leave me alone!" she pleaded as he pulled her dress off of her.
Tyrell pulled off her many layers of clothing, then forced himself on top of her. "Don't you tell a soul!" he commanded.
Caroline screamed as he put himself into her. "Lord above, I'm so sorry! Please, I still want to be a virgin!" Tears choked her, making it hard for her to breathe.
Tyrell was finally in her and moving up and down. The shrill cries and begs did not faze him one bit.
Caroline tried to pull away, but he only hurt her more. "Please Tyrell, don't do this. What will the Lord think?"
Tyrell grew angry. "What the hell do I care?" he demanded, touching her breasts in a perverted way.
Caroline closed her eyes. Lord above, please forgive me! I didn't mean for this to happen. Please, cleanse my soul and purify me. In Jesus' name I pray, Amen.
Tyrell leaned down and kissed her lips. "You are so beautiful," he whispered.
She pushed his head away. "Stop it! Stop it, leave me alone!" Tears were streaming down her soft cheeks and into her messed-up hair.
"I want to express my love for you," he whispered softly.
Caroline screamed. She thrust her legs into her stomach, but it did nothing. He just got more eager to have sex with her.
"Playing hard to get, I like that in a woman," he moaned in a flirtatious way.
Her cell phone suddenly went off. He leapt off her and looked at the ID. "It's your father," he told her.
"Give it to me," she said, holding out her hand.
He shook his head. "No, I'm gonna ignore it."
"Papa, please know that I need your help," she whispered as Tyrell returned.
Tyrell looked her body up and down. "Fix yourself up, then go home. Don't you say a word about what just happened, you here?"
She nodded frighteningly. Quickly, she got dressed and fixed her hair. Then, she made her way out of his house. Once she was out, she ran for her life. Never again did she ever want to see Tyrell again!
She opened the front door and stepped inside. Paulson and Elaine were in the living room reading their Bibles when she entered.
"Hi honey," Paulson greeted as Caroline walked by.
Head hung low, Caroline mumbled, "Hello Papa." She went upstairs and flung herself onto her bed. Not caring that Caren was in there, she bawled and bawled, not stopping.
"What's wrong with you?" she asked.
"Nothing, I'm fine!" she wailed into her pillow.
Caren sat down beside her and rubbed her flower-printed back. "It's okay, you can tell me."
"Promise you won't think I'm lying?"
"It all depends on what it's about," Caren replied, voice calm and sweet.
Caroline gulped. "It's about Tyrell," she confessed. "I, uh, was at his house today."
"Doing what?" Caren demanded. Her face was a pale white.
"That's w-what I want t-to t-talk to you ab-bout," she replied. "He raped me."
"What? How could you say such monstrous lie about my boyfriend? Just because you're jealous doesn't mean you have to lie about him!"
"But Caren I did-"
"Get out!" Caren screamed, tears streaming down her face. "Get out of my sight!"
Caroline hurried out of the room, scared and disappointed tears streaming down her face. Lord, will she ever believe me? Did I do the right thing?
"Caroline, you're so quiet. Is something bothering you?" Elaine asked her daughter.
Caroline shrugged. "I just had a fight with Caren, that's all." She held her chin in her hands, looking into nothingness.
Elaine sat down beside her and placed a motherly hand on her daughter's. "Please, do tell Mamma what's bothering you."
"I told Caren that I think Tyrell's no-good, and she won't believe me. Oh Mamma, I've heard awful things about him! Things I'd be ashamed to repeat. Please, help Caren to understand."
"It's young puppy love, Caroline. There's nothing I can do. Believe me, it'll go away in a while." She smiled. "I've had fantasies about bad boys when I was young." She looked into her cup of coffee as if the memory were floating on top of it.
"You did?"
She nodded. "Yes, but I got over them. Believe me, no harm comes from them. You just have to mind what you do around them. I think Caren has enough sense to know that." She sighed. "Besides, we'll watch out for her."
Caroline sighed a sigh of relief. "Thanks Mamma, I'm feeling some better now." She planted a kiss on her mother's cheek before going out to the barn to feed her horse.
Chapter 6
I Love You, Caren Capp
Caren snuck out of her parent's house the very next day after her sister's rape. She just had to go see Tyrell and spend time with him.
Knock, knock! Tyrell jumped up from the couch and opened the front door to his house. "Hey Caren!" he greeted, pulling her hand to his lips. "It's good to see you again."
She smiled, then planted a passionate and wet one on him. "Oh Tyrell, I've missed you so much!"
I haven't missed you, he thought to himself, thinking of the "fun" time he'd had with Caroline. "Is that right?"
She nodded excitedly. "I can't stand being without you."
"Come, let's go to my bedroom. I need to talk to you." He grabbed her by the hand and lead her up to his bedroom. They both sat down, gazes stuck on each other.
He held her hands in his.
"What's so important that you've got to tell me?" she questioned, voice sweet and innocent.
He gulped. "I love you, Caren Capp," he confessed, eyes serious.
Caren's heart pounded. Love? She'd never thought of him loving her! "I love you too, Tyrell Hawkins."
Tyrell pulled her into a relieved hug. "Oh, I'm so glad!" he exclaimed, kissing her every so often.
The modern bedroom made the scene so romantic. It was much different than her own, but comfortable.
"I can't believe you actually love me," she told him. "I guess I never really thought about being loved by a man other than Papa."
"You know what else?"
She shook her head.
"I'm a Christian!" he announced, making himself look so happy and full of excitement.
"Oh, how wonderful!" she cried, kissing his lips tenderly.
"Want me to show how much I love you?" he asked her.
"I uh, well, I don't know. How would you do that?"
"Let me show you," he said slowly.
Caren watched dreamily as Tyrell removed her of her clothes, then did the same to himself. She saw a whole new side to him she'd never dreamed of!
The romance then began. Moaning, Caren kissed Tyrell. "Hmm. . ."
Tyrell was thrilled that she was enjoying their sex. He was kind of worried she may act like her sister had. Caren was far better at it too.
"You liking this?" he whispered in her ear.
"Oh yes!" she replied, heart feeling overwhelmed.
After a few more minutes, Caren redressed herself. "That was fun. Do you think all young Christian couples are doing that these days?"
He shook head. "No dear, we just had sex," he replied.
Caren paled. "What?" she demanded. "Sex? Why didn't you tell me? Papa never got into detail, so I never knew! The Lord commands we stay pure until we marry!" Tears swelled up in her eyes. "I can't believe you!"
She was about to run out the door when Tyrell grabbed her arm and whirled her around to face him. "Don't you tell a soul. Your dad won't let me see you ever again. You do want to see me again, right?"
Her chest was heaving up and down. "I-I don't know. Goodbye Tyrell." She ran down the stairs and out the door. She didn't care that she'd have to walk home - it'd give her time to think.
That night, Caren could hardly look at her father without crying. She felt so guilty, and she knew Paulson would skin her and Tyrell for having intercourse without being married.
"Caren, Caroline, you both seem so withdrawn tonight. Something happen?" Paulson asked his girls.
Caren sighed, still playing with her green beans. "I'm fine Papa, I just had a fight with Tyrell."
"Tyrell?" he demanded. "I thought I told you I didn't want you around him!"
"You did, Papa. I'm sorry I disobeyed you. In fact, we were fighting about you not wanting us together. He wanted to stay together." She gulped. "Don't worry Papa, it's all over."
Paulson nodded. "You do know I'll have to punish you though, right?" he asked her.
Caren nodded slowly. "Yes sir."
Elaine gave her daughter a concerned glance. "Paulson, don't you think maybe the girls are getting too old for spankings?"
"No!" her husband grumbled. "If spankings work, then I shall continue to use them. They can be twenty and get spanked if they still live under my roof!"
Elaine gave her girls a weak smile. "As you wish, dear," she sighed, taking a bite of her ham.
Chapter 7
Questioning All I Know
Caren stepped inside the church, feeling undeserving of its services. She felt so dirty and terrible. Trying not to make eye contact with anyone, she took her seat in the front of the room.
Caroline sat down beside her, worry on her face. She tapped on Caren's shoulder.
Caren turned, eyes tearing up. "What?"
"Please do tell me what's wrong," she pried.
Caren scooted close. "Promise not to tell anyone?"
"Promise."
Caren gulped. "Tyrell and I had sex together," she whispered, voice quivering.
Caroline's eyes nearly popped out of her head. "Are you serious?" she asked.
Caren nodded sorrowfully. "Yes, I'm dead serious. What shall I do, I feel so awful being here when I'm not pure."
"I'd repent. I hear tell that Brother Nate is going to do a repent thing today, so that'd be the best time to do it."
Caren dabbed her eyes with her dress. "I think you're right."
Brother Nate came hobbling up to the altar, tears threatening his eyes. "I have an apology to make," he mumbled into the microphone. "We haven't had enough prayer meetings throughout the week. I know we should, b-but I'm so selfish that it doesn't happen." He bowed his head. "Dear Lord, please forgive me. I'm so sorry I haven't been living up to your word."
Then the waterworks came. He always went up to the altar and cried his eyes out for no reason. Everything in his mind was his fault. The oddest thing was that they seemed to have prayer meetings just about every day of the week!
He kept bawling into the microphone, blubbering words every once in a while.
Caren rolled her eyes. It's not your fault. Why do you always cry over things that mean nothing?
"I'd like to repent." He went down on his hands and knees and began repenting up in front of everyone.
Several others went up to the front of the church to repent. Caren was one of them.
She lay down on the cold floor and prayed to God. She had to make things right considering she'd had sex when she wasn't supposed to.
Soon after she began, tears were spilling down her cheeks and onto the floor. She knew she'd basically just slapped God across the face when she'd disobeyed him so.
Finally, she returned to her seat, noticing that Nate was still down on his knees.
After quite a while, he rose. Face still red, he returned to where he'd been standing.
You're finally able to stand, Caren thought to herself.
Then her father went up to speak. "I want to remind you all of your duties in the Christian life. You need to obey all of God's commands, no matter what they are. Like you can't go to amusement parks or knuckle touch."
Caren gave her father an odd look. Amusement parks and knuckle touching? What's wrong with them? I never saw once in the Bible that God commands you don't do that!
She waited for her father to explain what was so terrible about them, but he didn't. To her, he seemed to be trying to dictate their lives. Was she maybe living in a cult?
Questions were beginning to flood her mind. Why didn't they ever go out anywhere for fun? Why didn't they listen to music other than church music? What was the matter with all those things? Were they only wrong because Papa said so?
After church, Caren could hardly obtain herself. She had to know why all these things were wrong. All her life, she'd been taught to believe that what they were preaching in church was the Word of God, but now she wasn't so sure. God had never told her these things personally.
"Caren, are you feeling better?" Caroline asked her.
Caren nodded. "Yes, but now I've got bigger problems," she replied.
Caroline gave her a curious look. "What's wrong?"
Caren swallowed. "Caroline, do you honestly believe everything they preach is from God?"
Caroline sighed. She scooted close to her sister. "Honestly, I think a lot of the things they preach are senseless."
"Me too," Caren agreed. "Do you really want to stay in this church?"
"No, but what other choice do we have? Mamma and Papa would be crushed if we decided not to attend."
Caren shook her head. "I don't know. I also think that they believe there is only one correct way to believe and interpret the Bible. I don't believe that. I think God gives each person a specific way to believe in Him, and they have to live that way in order to obey Him."
Caroline thought that over. "You know, I think you're right. Why would everyone have to believe the same when we each have our strengths and weaknesses?"
"Exactly my thinking."
Caroline closed her eyes momentarily. "This is so confusing. This is all we've known. It's almost like living on another planet all your life, then moving to another one."
"It is. Wanna leave?" she asked, motioning to the doors.
Caroline nodded, then they both left the church. They decided that it wasn't too long a walk, so they'd just walk all the way home.
"Caren, why'd you leave with your sister right after church?" Paulson asked his daughter at lunch.
"Papa, I don't want to go to church anymore. I don't have similar beliefs and I feel as though you're trying put all your convictions on the entire church."
Paulson slammed down his napkin. "Well, tough! You're going to church as long as you live under my roof! That goes for you too Caroline!" he shouted.
Chapter 8
Sneaking Out To The "Devil's Park"
"Yes, Mamma and Papa are still sleeping," Caren said into the phone early in the morning.
"Good. I'm outside your house right now. Come out and I'll take you to Knoebel's."
Caren hung up and ran out the kitchen door. Her face brightened when she saw Tyrell in his red mustang. She climbed in the passenger's seat, then buckled up.
"You ready for some rebellion?" he asked her, a naughty smile on his face.
Caren nodded nervously. "Yeah, let's just hope Papa doesn't find out."
"Who cares? The worst he can do is ground you."
Caren gave him a worried glance. "Papa still spanks my sister and I," she said quietly.
"What? What a psycho! Who spanks a sixteen-year-old girl?"
"It's a common practice amongst the church. Spankings work, so they see no use in stopping." She sighed. "They work for me, I just feel too big for them."
"You are too big for them. I can't believe how idiotic he is!" he exclaimed.
Caren giggled. "I guess it does seem strange to you, considering you're an outsider."
Tyrell leaned over and kissed her cheek. "Be prepared, Knoebel's has tons of 'outsiders.'" He smiled. "That don't bother you, does it?"
She shook her head. "I'm your girlfriend, ain't I? If outsiders bothered me, I wouldn't be going out with you."
He chuckled in the manly way he always did. "Yeah, I guess not."
"You know, Papa thinks that amusement parks are the 'Devil's Parks,'" she told him suddenly. "I don't believe that though. The devil wouldn't want people to have fun."
Tyrell shrugged. "Well, your father is full of shit. He wouldn't know anything."
Caren was surprised at his sudden change of language. I thought he said he was a Christian. Hmm, maybe he's still working on a few things. She smiled awkwardly at him. "Papa is full of something."
He laughed heartily. "Glad you see it the way I do." He concentrated on the road, blue eyes completely focused.
Caren felt a tingling feeling in her heart by the way he concentrated on the road. She felt so proud to be with such a handsome and great guy. Never in a million years had she ever thought she'd be going out with one of the most popular guys at school.
He noticed her admiration from the corner of his eyes. He looked at her out of the corner of his eye, a sly smile on his face.
Caren saw him and looked away. Face blushed, she tried to keep her gaze on the world around him.
Tyrell shook his head. "You know, Babe, you can stare at me all you want. I am your's after all."
Caren blushed redder. "Tyrell, you're embarrassing me," she said quietly.
"That's what I'm here for," he joked.
Caren swatted at his arm.
"What?"
"You better not be my boyfriend just to embarrass me!" she scolded in a teasing way.
"What if I am?"
"Then I'll spank you," she replied in a flirty way.
Tyrell's eyebrows raised. "You will, will you? Maybe your dad will beat you to it."
Caren blurted out a laugh. "Yeah, you're probably right," she laughed, loving every minute of their conversation.
They finally arrived. He pulled into the parking space the instructor told him to pull into. "We're here!" he announced, turning off the engine.
She nodded. "Yep."
He got out, then opened the door for her.
"Thank you." She grabbed his hand and followed him to the "Stamp Stand" as Tyrell called it.
The line was long, but Caren couldn't care less. She was content just holding her beau's hand.
Finally, it was their turn to get their hands stamped. Afterwards, they went off looking for the first ride to go on.
"Do you like water?" he asked her, staring at the Flume.
Caren nodded excitedly. "Yes, let's go on the Flume!" she replied, jumping up and down anxiously.
He kissed her lips, then dragged her to the water ride. They got on, then waited excitedly for it to jolt forward.
"This is so exciting," she whispered as they climbed up the track.
Tyrell grabbed her hand and nodded. "Get ready, we're soon gonna go down real fast."
Caren gasped when they stopped at the end of the track, right before the big drop. Suddenly, they were falling down, Caren screaming of fear and pure joy. She'd never been on such a thing in her entire life!
A splash of water hit them, soaking Caren's dress and prayer veil. She laughed and laughed as they got off the ride.
~J~
"Where in the world is she?" Paulson asked his wife as they paced the kitchen back and forth.
Elaine had a knowing look in her eyes. She could easily guess who Caren was with right now.
"She didn't say anything to me," Caroline told him, face full of despair. "I wish she'da at least left a note."
Paulson nodded. "I hope she didn't. . ."
Elaine gasped. "You really don't think she'd do that, do you?" she asked him.
Paulson shrugged. "She has been angry with me lately," he mumbled.
Elaine's eyes filled with tears. Please Lord, don't let it be so. Please don't let it that she ran away from home. She grabbed her husband's hand. "Let's pray."
~J~
Caren and Tyrell stopped by his favorite pizza place and ordered. Afterwards, they sat down at their table and waited for their number to be called.
"Tyrell, does it always take so long to get food here?" Caren asked him, checking her watch.
Tyrell bobbed his head up and down. "Yep, usually takes a million years."
She laughed. "Well, it better not this time. I'd like to get married and have a family before then," she joked, a smile on her pretty delicate face.
Tyrell held her hand in his. "We will, even if we don't get our pizza before then," he whispered softly.
Caren's heart leapt out of her chest. Tyrell's flirty words always made her heart skip a beat and flush her face.
Tyrell noticed this, which was one of the reasons why he loved to talk that way. It pleased him to see her reaction to his romantic ways. I sure do have a way with girls, he thought to himself as he stared into her eyes.
Tyrell's bright blue eyes made her have a warm feeling inside her heart. Those eyes were so beautiful. With those eyes, Caren was sure he'd gotten away with a good deal he shouldn't have when he was a little boy. Would she have a baby to him someday that would be that cute?
"Number twenty-four," a woman called over the intercom.
Tyrell got up and went over to get their pizza. When he returned, he did not automatically open the pizza box.
Caren stared at him. "Um, aren't we gonna eat?" she asked softly.
"I'll say the blessing before we do."
Caren's heart was filled with great joy! "Oh yes, please do!"
Both bowed their heads in prayer. "Dear Lord Jesus, bless this food You have put before us. We thank You for your great many blessings in this life. I'd like to ask that You please help us on our paths to Heaven, and that You help Caren finds where she belongs.
"I'm sure You know that she isn't happy being a Charity. I'd like to ask that You please help her in standing up for herself. Thank You for allowing us to be together today to bless and worship You. May we be safe today, if it is Your Will. In Jesus Holy name I pray, Amen."
"Amen." Caren smiled at him, straight white teeth showing. "That was very nice, Tyrell. Thank you."
Tyrell opened the pizza box and handed her a piece. "There you go, my love."
Caren flashed a smile of thanks, then began eating. Her boyfriend surely was the best man in the entire world!
~J~
Caroline dialed the number on her cell phone. She couldn't bear it any longer, and she knew she couldn't let Papa see her calling.
"Hello?" a voice greeted.
"Hello Caren. It's Caroline. Where are you?"
"Knoebel's why?" she replied.
Caroline sighed. "We've been looking all over for you. I think it's best you get home before Papa gets very angry."
"Please don't tell him where I am! He'll skin me worse if he knew!"
"Alright, but get back here soon. Papa's very upset as it is."
~J~
Caren slowly went up the porch steps. She hesitated before opening the door.
"Caren!" Paulson exclaimed as soon as she stepped in. "Where have you been?"
Caren swallowed. "Amusement park, Papa."
Paulson stood up, grabbed her by the arm, and marched upstairs.
Caroline could hear the cries and lashes of the spanking. She could hardly stand Papa's brutal punishments anymore. He got worse every time.
Chapter 9
Unexpected News
Caren limped into the high school for the first day of school. She'd been "spanked" by Papa last week for being caught making out with Tyrell. Her thigh was black and blue from so many blows from Papa's new paddle.
"Caren Capp, are you alright?" Mr. Willard asked her.
Caren nodded. "Yes, I'm fine."
"Why are you limping?" he questioned, looking at her leg.
"I'm fine!" she shouted, tears threatening to stream out her eyes.
"We're going to the nurse," he told her, dragging her to Mrs. Bromfield's office.
The nurse checked her out, and was surprised to see the bruises on her leg. "You're going to the hospital," she told Caren.
Caren sat in the examining room, waiting for the doctor to come back with results of how bad her leg was. Of course, she'd had to take a urine test, so that'd have to come back too.
Her head jerked up when she heard the door open. In came her doctor, a sad look on his face.
Her heart pounded. "Doctor, am I alright?" she asked him.
He nodded slowly. "Yes, yes your leg is fine. I'm afraid I have some news for you though."
Caren gulped. She hardly breathe now, just thinking of what he could possibly say scared her. Tears swelled up in her eyes. "Papa," she mouthed, shaking her head.
"I'll run a few more tests, then call you when I'm sure. I don't want to tell you something that isn't true. Oh, where did you get those bruises anyways? They look like paddle marks."
"Ugh, just one of the bullies at school," she lied.
The man lowered his glasses and peered over them at her with suspicious eyes. "Are you sure, Caren?" he questioned, voice serious.
She nodded worriedly. "Believe me, they'll be taken care of." She jumped off the examining bed and headed to the door. "Good day."
She made her way out the hospital and got a ride back to school from the nurse.
That night, Caren got Paulson to sign her school papers, then she and Caroline went outside to tend to the horses.
Caroline was feeding Daisy when Caren cleared her throat to speak.
She gulped, then said, "Caroline, the doctor questioned me about my bruises today."
Caroline froze. She looked at her sisters, eyes terrified. "What'd you say?"
"I told him it was bullies." She sighed. "I couldn't tell him Papa had done it. You know they'd have Mamma and Papa arrested for child abuse if they knew. Oh Caroline, I can't let that happen!"
Caroline nodded slowly. "Yes, nobody must know. I love Mamma and Papa too much to allow them to be arrested - especially Mamma." She smiled. "I guess I favor Mamma."
Caren belted out a laugh. "Yeah, me too. Papa's too hard to favor when he beats you all the time with the paddle and belt." Tears filled her brown eyes. "Caroline, he does abuse us!" she cried.
Caroline ran into her sisters arms and held her. "Shh, it's alright Caren. We only have two more years with him," she whispered.
Caren cried louder. "Two years?" she bawled. "Who knows how many spankings I'll get in that time!"
Caroline squeezed her sister tighter. "I know, it's hard to tell. I fear getting whipped and paddled by Papa too. He does it far too often and for the littlest things."
Caren wiped the tears from her eyes. "We'd best get our chores done before he does spank us," she told her sister, picking her pitchfork back up to feed the other horse.
"Girls, are you two soon done in there?" Paulson called in his glum voice.
Caren stiffened. "Yes, real soon Papa!" she replied, trying to keep her voice calm.
She quickly finished her work, then hurried to help Elaine set the table.
"What took you so long, Missy?" Elaine laughed, handing her the plates.
"Talkin' with the Lord I suppose," she lied.
Elaine nodded. "Alright."
In the middle of dinner, the phone rang. "I'll get it!" Caren offered, remembering the doctor had told her he'd be calling.
She got up and picked it up. "Hello, Capps," she greeted in a nervous voice.
"Is this Caren Capp?" a male's voice asked.
"Yes, yes it is."
"The tests came back, Caren."
Caren sighed. "Alright, please do tell me what has you sounding so concerned."
Paulson looked up when he hear her say that. Who could possibly be talking to her?
"Caren, you're pregnant," he told her in a sad voice.