I Am…

Intro

So it's been a year since I decided to leave behind being Iron Man. No more battles, enemies, deadly S.H.E.I.L.D. missions or worrying about the safety of my love, Pepper. Yes….I said it; she is the love of my life, no doubt about it. But, back to the point. Ever since I stopped being Iron Man I stopped having "a purpose" I guess. With no one to save and no enemies to take down, what really separates me from everyone else? So now, I'm trapped. I must face the memory of who I used to be and face the really of who I am.

Chapter 1

"Jarvis, news channel and quick, gotta watch the report on what happened last night at the beach" ,I ordered.

"Yes, Sir, right away" Jarvis answered.

The TV switched over to CNN where news reporters spoke about the large shark, contaminated by rare toxins in the ocean. The conversation soon changed over to The Avengers, and how they stopped the shark and sent it in for testing. There goes Bruce and Thor- the power team, fighting off the shark, while Hawkeye aimed at it, to take it down. Even though they were in battle they all looked determined and satisfied. Satisfied with the fact that even if they died fighting that shark; they did it to save the people of America. Determined to end this destroyer of peace on the beach. The screen showed a picture of them all standing together in a line. Bruce was still in Hulk form. Steve stood tall and with honor, as always. Thor stood firm and held a serious face, the face tattooed on him from battle. And of course Natasha and Hawkeye stood close to each other, both agreeing to not notice their strong attraction to one another. I sighed at them, as if they could actually hear me, God I wish one of them could.

"Sir?" Jarvis asked me, knocking me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah?" I answered slightly annoyed.

"I don't mean to offend you Sir, but in your current state I don't suggest watching The Avengers all day" Jarvis said, a hint of worry in his voice.

put my hand to my forehead and slid it down my face. Why did I create him to be so human? At first it seemed like a great idea but now it was a pain. He was a pain. Because every emotion I have he knows and he calls it out. But, he was right, this was the last thing I should be watching. It was bringing out my depression, even my anxiety. Watching them always brought them out. Because if I wasn't depressed about who I used to be, I was anxious about who I am now, or for better wording, who I'm trying to become. See there isn't a handbook on being a superhero. Nothing and no one there to tell you how to use your powers and how to deal with not having them at all. I guess the only thing even close to a handbook would be parents. But…..I didn't have that really. I had voicemails and news reports, that's how I got advice from my parents. If the news reports were good then sure I guess I should try out what my dad did. And if they were bad I knew what to avoid. Then when I started seeing less and less of Robert Stark on TV that taught me a very cold and bitter reality. If you're not coming out with whatever is or will be cool then people start to forget about you. That's what happened to me, news reports stopped asking about where I was and The Avengers stopped bringing me up. I was old news.

"Tony!" I heard Pepper yell from behind me. "Are you watching them on the news again?! What did I tell you about that? Remember what the therapist said the last time…."

"Yes, hon I do remember what both you and the therapist said. I was just curious about the type of toxin that shark had in him, I mean look at the size of that!" I answered quickly in an attempt to calm Pepper down.

I gently grabbed her hand and gave it a sweet kiss. Her face softened and I felt some of the tension between us go away.

"Don't worry about me, I'm fine" I assure her while putting her hand to my heart.

A look of relief comes across her face as she, for the millionth time realizes that there's actually a warm beating heart inside my chest. Not a reactor that could be easily destroyed or rusted. I am relieved by that thought as well. And deep deep down I know that even though it's more on their plate, The Avengers are proud of my decision too. Each one of them has their own personal feeling of relief for me inside.

The Next Morning

I wake up to the sound of laughter in the kitchen. Pepper must have company over. My eyes just begin to adjust to the sunlight in the room, and then…..BAM. I'm so startled by the loud noise that I fall to the floor. Then I hear booming laughter and many heavy footsteps. I push up from the floor to see Thor and Steve walk in, faces red from laughter and eyes watery from crying.

"You should have seen your face!" Steve said between laughs.

"How does the program go?" Thor asked while laughing. "Oh! We owned you!"

They both die laughing in the doorway, while I still try to slow my heart rate and breathing. It's great to see them here but geez I could've gone into yet another anxiety attack!

"Yeah, yeah you got me, don't make such a big deal about it" I said slightly irritated at the fact that I enjoyed their way of waking me up.

We all walked into the kitchen and I saw Pepper, Jane, and Natasha all sitting by the counter. Jane smiled and then quickly returned her attention to Pepper and Natasha. Natasha turned and looked me up and down.

"You look like you fell out of a-"Natasha said but was cut off by Peppers strong grip on her arm. "A…bed" she said in replacement.

I noticed her cover up but continued on. "Well excuse me Miss Love and sunshine, but I didn't exactly wake up next to the love of my life this morning" I shot back.

Her cheeks flooded red and she stole a quick glance at Hawkeye who pretended to be so into the show he was watching. Then turned back at me and shot me a dirty look.

"Well, what brings the entire team here? I know everyone hear has better plans than to see an old hero" I said surely.

Then I hear Bruce's voice say, "We're here because we need your help".

I turn and he stands there with a cool look on his face. Suddenly the room loses it's warmth and everyone goes still.

"What's the problem?" I asked him.

At first he is hesitant to answer. "I'm sure you remember the Tesseract. Well the tests came back from the shark early this morning and it's something similar to it that infected the shark. Thor here calls it "the darkness" from this guy Malekith , but in reality it's an energy source powerful enough to kill any of us that go near it."

"And you're telling me this why? I mean you have a super soldier, a God and a Hulk, you can't handle it on your own?" I asked honestly clueless.

Thor stepped in this time. "You had a power source inside of you for years, Tony Stark, a power source that should have killed you from the beginning but it didn't. None of us have dealt with something to that extremity before. Of course our first thought was Bruce with the gamma rays and all but in his….condition, he wouldn't be able to be guided through the correct destroying process. But you on the other hand, now that's worth a shot".

I took a deep breath. Tried so hard to take in all this information. First the Tesseract, aliens, Gods and wormholes. Now darkness, Malekith and destroying a very powerful unearthly source. Wow I guess even without the reactor or the suit I still have problems. I look back at Pepper and her eyes tell me "No! 100% No!" But this is what I do, this is what I live for. And because of this I'm certain she won't be pleased with my answer to The Avengers request.

"I'm gonna need more info…but definitely tell S.H.I.E.L.D. …I'm in."