John groaned tiredly, lifting one hand to rub half-heartedly over his eyes. Something had awakened him from his peaceful slumber and, try as he might, he couldn't pull himself out of his sleepy haze enough to figure out what it was. He sighed heavily and dropped his hand back to his side, the light from outside slipping through the space between the drawn room-darkening curtains. Just as he was about to turn himself over and fall back into blissful unconsciousness, he felt something. A soft, feather-light pressure in the center of his left thigh. A gentle warmth radiated from the spot and spread up his leg and through the center of his body, settling deep in his heart, and he knew immediately.

Randy.

The pressure moved higher up his thigh, closer to his hip, and John smiled to himself, reaching down underneath the sheets draped around his waist to smooth his hand through his lover's hair. He felt Randy tense the tiniest bit when his cold ring grazed the top of his head, and he sighed happily when he felt Randy relax again, another gentle kiss being placed directly over his left hip. John reached around and cupped Randy's cheek in his hand, his thumb tracing over his lover's perfect cheekbone and around the shell of his ear. He felt Randy nip at the skin of his hip gently before placing another sweet kiss over the spot, and he couldn't wait anymore.

"Come here, baby. Please?"

Randy smiled upon hearing John's voice, all sleep and contentment. He slid slowly up John's strong body until the covers lifted slightly and he could see John's face. He gazed up into his lover's sleepy blue eyes, his chin resting just under John's belly button, and blinked innocently.

"But it's so warm and cozy down here, Johnny."

John laughed brightly. Randy had pulled himself far enough up John's body to let his face peek out of the sheets, but the crisp white linens still tented over his head. With his big blue eyes blinking and full lips fighting not to turn up into a grin, Randy looked adorable to John. John sat up a bit, reaching both hands down and hooking Randy under the arms, dragging the younger man up his body. He leaned back into his pillows and stared up at Randy, the other man's hips cradled tightly in his own, and he sighed. Randy shifted his hips, leaning on the forearms resting on either side of John's head and readjusting himself, and John cocked an eyebrow.

"Seems like you're plenty cozy up here too, babe." Randy smirked and leaned over, softly pressing his lips to John's. John couldn't contain the happy groan that spilled from the back of his throat at finally being able to taste his lover. Randy always knew exactly how to kiss him. He pressed their lips together softly, gently, pulling his head back just enough to brush John's lower lip with his own. When John ached for more pressure, Randy obliged, sealing their lips together sweetly before swiping his tongue over John's top lip. John gasped and opened his mouth for Randy who ran his tongue around the inside of John's top and bottom lips. John's body shuddered, and he could feel Randy smirking into their kiss, knowing he loved how John reacted to him.

When Randy sucked John's lower lip into his mouth and nibbled it gently, John's toes curled and his fingers gripped Randy's hips tightly. He sucked lightly on Randy's tongue as it slid once again into his mouth, and Randy groaned, hands gripping the sheets as his hips ground gently into John's. Both men pulled away breathlessly. John blinked up at Randy and moved one hand to cup his cheek again, the other rubbing smooth circles over Randy's naked hip.

"I missed you," he whispered sweetly, stroking his thumb over Randy's bottom lip. Randy laughed as he placed a small kiss over John's thumb.

"I was right here beside you all night, goof. You should know; you rolled on top of me around 2 AM and nearly smothered me." John swatted at Randy's ass, and he laughed, leaning over to place another kiss to the corner of John's upturned lips. "Kidding, Johnny, kidding. You know I love having you on top of me."

"Oh, is that so?" John's small smile morphed into a confident smirk. He powered Randy up and over, reversing their positions. He now lay cradled between Randy's ample thighs while Randy looked up at him, laughing. John let the rich sound roll over him, feeling wrapped up in it as if it held actual weight, and he shivered. He leaned in closely, his kiss landing to the side of the bridge of Randy's nose, and pressed his forehead to Randy's, suddenly serious. "Physically, you were here, I know, but…you weren't in my dreams. You're always in my dreams, Randy. Always. You weren't this time." He looked deep into Randy's eyes. "You dream about me too, baby, right? And we're always together. So what happened?"

John felt fear grip him as Randy turned his head away, looking anywhere but in his eyes. He pushed himself up onto his hands, putting some distance between their chests so he could look at his lover properly. Randy gazed off to the side, teeth worrying his lower lip, and John felt uneasy.

"Randy?"

"I'm sorry I wasn't there. I...my dreams weren't so great last night."

"Tell me." John lowered himself enough to kiss Randy's jaw before pulling back to look into his eyes. Randy inhaled deeply.

"You left me. You took Lanna. And you…I was alone. You left me." Randy felt himself beginning to break, the last vestiges of his nightmare swimming to the surface of his consciousness, and he tried to push John off of him so that he could hide his weakness. John, however, was having none of that.

"Whoa whoa whoa, hold on a second." John flattened himself to Randy's chest, lips hovering mere centimeters over Randy's trembling ones. He curled a hand around the back of Randy's neck and peered into his eyes, knowing Randy needed to see the truth and not just hear it. "What you're describing is impossible. One, Alanna is your daughter. I would never in a million years take her from you, not only because that's kidnapping but also because your pain is my own, and taking your baby girl from you is the surest way to hurt you. Which I would never do. And two, Randy…" John shook his head, not knowing how to say what he was thinking. "I could never leave you. Ever. You drive me insane sometimes, yes, but…I don't have a life without you. I need you. You are my next breath. You're a part of my soul, my DNA. I'm not me without you. Leaving you? Randy, that's suicide. I love you. I'm not going anywhere."

Randy could barely hold himself together. John was never one to hide what he was feeling; that was Randy's job. John wore his heart on his sleeve. But there was something about John's words that struck Randy so deeply that he swore he felt his heart stutter. He grabbed John's face in his hands and pulled him down, knowing John could feel the few tears that had escaped fall down his cheeks and not caring. This kiss was so much different from the last one. Where the other was slow and gentle, this one was fast and hard. Randy poured every ounce of himself into John, and John did the same. John pulled away first, barely staying afloat in the tempest that was Randy's kiss. Randy pulled John back to him quickly, sucking his lower lip into his mouth and grinding his hips upward into John's. The combined sensations sent shots of electricity up John's spine, and he moaned loudly, almost missing the words Randy whispered against his tongue.

"Love me, Johnny." John pulled back and looked into Randy's eyes. He could see lust in those pale blue eyes, but behind all of that was an insecurity that John couldn't understand.

How could you not know how perfect you are?

"I do, baby. And I will." John kissed Randy slowly, one hand stroking Randy's jaw while the other slipped between their bodies to wrap around Randy's cock. The younger man gasped, and his eyes widened, mouth falling slack as John stroked him.

"God, look at you, Rand. If you could see yourself the way I see you…" John echoed his earlier thoughts, this time out loud. "How can you not know how perfect you are, Randy? How can you not know?"

Randy felt his heart swell at John's words even as his hips rocked slowly up into John's tight fist. He gripped at John's forearm with one hand and clawed the sheets with the other, feeling overwhelmed by the sensations John was creating for him. John swirled his thumb around the head of Randy's cock, smearing drops of pre-cum over the blunt tip, and Randy's head fell back. He licked his lips and bit the bottom one, a low moan rumbling through him as John's thumb circled around where the head of Randy's stiff erection met the shaft. His eyes fell closed. So fucking good, oh God…

John was enthralled by Randy. Randy's dark eyelashes kissed his flushed cheeks, and those full lips were open and moist from Randy running his tongue over them again and again. A thin sheen of sweat had appeared on Randy's chest, making the perfectly sculpted pecs glisten, and John groaned.

"Goddamn, you're beautiful. So fucking beautiful, Randy." John leaned over and gave Randy an open-mouthed kiss, tongue mapping out Randy's lips, tongue, and teeth. He let go of Randy's erection long enough to lick a wet stripe down his own palm before wrapping it back around the thick cock bumping against his own and tugging tightly.

"John, oh my God!" Randy was certain he was losing his mind. Where before John's hand was tight and warm around his dick, now it was wet, tight, and warm. He felt his toes curl into the sheets as John stroked him hard from the base of his dick and twisted his hand as he went back to the top. The air around him was warm and full, and he knew he needed more.

"Johnny, please. Please, I need you inside of me."

John paused, his fist still wrapped tightly around Randy's shaft. He had to sure he'd heard Randy correctly. "You…what?"

"I need you inside of me. Please." He reached down and wrapped his own hand around John's dick, the shorter but thicker shaft filling his fist in a way that made Randy crazy. He wanted his body to feel as filled with John as his hand did. "I want this. Give it to me."

John moaned deeply, head falling to the crook of Randy's shoulder. It wasn't often that Randy asked to be taken. More often than not, John was the one on the receiving end of things; only on those nights that Randy needed to be dominated and punished did he allow John to take him. For him to ask to have John inside of him like this was sending warm pulses of love and pleasure to his heart and to his groin.

"Take what you want from me, Daddy. Every bit of me is yours." John nipped at Randy's ear and missed the way Randy's eyes slipped closed in happiness at John's words and in lust at John's use of his nickname. He felt Randy shift his hips a little and pushed up onto his forearms to look into Randy's eyes. The two men stared intently at each other, breathing erratically. John gripped Randy's free hand in his own, and Randy squeezed it tightly as he used his other to push John's erection into his body.

"Randy, fucking hell," John moaned deeply, his head falling back to Randy's shoulder. Hot curls of pleasure radiated through him as Randy's tight body pulled him in. The pre-cum that had leaked from the head of his cock served as enough of a lubricant to smooth his entry into Randy's waiting warmth, and while a part of him knew that he should've made Randy wait so that he could prepare him, he also knew that Randy liked that sharp sting of being filled. He also knew he'd more than make up for the pain Randy was feeling by giving him more pleasure than he could handle.

"Johnny, move. I need you to move, baby, please. God, please." Randy was breathing heavily, his chest colliding with John's, the slide of the older man's skin on his turning him on even further.

John lowered his lips to Randy's as he slid home, his pelvis finally meeting Randy's body. Randy gasped into their kiss, loving how John stretched him. He felt so full of John, not just physically but emotionally as well; John whispered lovingly in his ear and against his lips as he prepared to move.

"I love being with you like this, Randy. It feels so good to have you wrapped around me, to know that you trust me enough to fill you like this. Fuck, baby." John pulled out until just the head of his erection rested inside Randy's body, and Randy hated the loss. He was about to protest when John suddenly pushed back in, tilting Randy's hips up with his hands and hitting his prostate. The feeling curled his toes and made his eyes roll back into his head, and the moan that left him made John shudder. John continued to thrust in and out of Randy's body, setting a slow but forceful pace that tore the breath right out of Randy. His body was rocked upwards with each of John's powerful thrusts, and he arched and thrashed, even as his heart swelled as John whispered to him.

"God, Randy, you're everything to me. I want nothing more than to be with you. Like this. Always." John punctuated each sentence with a kiss and a slide of his hips, the dominance in the thrusts working with the love in his kisses to make Randy melt into the mattress. His hands dipped beneath the sheets to grip the cheeks of John's ass, pushing his lover deeper into his body.

"John, touch me. Make me come. Fuck, I need to come, Johnny." John groaned, reaching down to fulfill his lover's request. He squeezed tightly, stroking Randy's dick with a faster rhythm than the one he was using to pump into his body. The contrast was killing Randy. His hands slid up and gripped John's hips, fingers digging into the skin. He could feel the first grips of his orgasm tugging at him, and he knew he wouldn't last long.

"Tell me you love me, John." John looked down at his lover, seeing in his face that the man was close to falling apart. He pressed a sweet kiss against Randy's lips that made him whimper softly before he whispered into his ear.

"I love you more than the sun and the stars. I love you more than every word in every book in all the world. I love you from here to the moon and back. Every day from now until forever, Randy, I love you."

Randy's back arched beautifully off the sheets as he came, tears slipping down his face. His orgasm had been imminent, but it was the love in John's voice, the honesty in it that had pushed him over the edge. His legs quivered and shook with the force of his pleasure, and his mouth opened in a silent moan, the sensations so good that he had seemingly lost his ability to produce sound. He wrapped his legs tightly around John, pulling him deeper into his body, and John mewled into Randy's chest, his orgasm rocking him to the core as he spilled himself inside Randy.

Randy moaned quietly as he felt John's seed warm him. As John collapsed onto his chest, hot breath caressing his neck and shoulder, he felt at peace. He wrapped his arms tightly around John, fingers trailing paths across John's shoulders and up and down his spine. He kissed the top of John's head, grinning and burying his nose in the cropped blonde hair. He could feel John pressing light kisses across his pec and collar bone, and he squirmed, dislodging John's softening cock from his body. John moaned and rolled over, pulling Randy securely against him and tangling their legs together.

"You love me." Randy sounded as though he'd had an epiphany. John chuckled, the sound rumbling against the cheek Randy had pressed to his chest.

"Yes. I do." Randy squeezed John, his thumbs tracing patterns into John's sweaty skin.

"I love you, too. More than anything. More than everything. There's only ever been you."

John's eyes slid shut as he took in Randy's words. It was a common misconception that Randy had no feelings; in fact, just the opposite was true. While it was true that he didn't speak much about his emotions, Randy felt everything a human being could possibly feel, and he felt things intensely. When he was happy, he was ecstatic. When he was mad, he was irate. And when he loved, it was with a passion and a fervor no one could ever hope to understand. John knew all of this to be true – they'd lived together as a couple for a few years and had gotten engaged at Randy's proposal – yet it still made his heart swell to the point of bursting to hear Randy say that he loved him. He kissed the top of Randy's head, sighing happily as he felt Randy's breathing even out. John drifted off not soon after Randy as the afternoon sun beat down on the house, though not disturbing the two satisfied lovers inside it. John melted into the mattress and slept the day away, dreaming peacefully.

And Randy was right there with him.