Inspector Takagi sighed.

He did not understand why all the residents of the block in Beika had been killed some days ago. The doors were turned apart and everywhere he has looked there were dead bodys. On the mirror there was standing just one word. Revenge. Takagi didn't knew what that meant. Of course he knew the word, but he didn't knew why it was painted on the mirror. The dead bodys, lying in their own blood had been very scary. Some he had known, like the famous actress Chris Vineyard and some of them he had seen there for the first time.

He sighed again.

Japan was very silent today and he had to drive through Tokyo today.

He didn't mind about the silence, but he didn't even find a parking offender and he got bored.

There was nothing.

Nothing but snow, a tree, a bush, one more tree, a lot more snow, a car, a girl lying in the snow, one more bu...

Wait a second! The policemen jumped to the brake, so that the tires squeaked and the car stopped with a jar. There truly was a girl lying in the snow. The young man got out of the car very hasty and ran to the girl's lifeless body. Her skin was full of ice and she wasn't breathing anymore. Suddenly he noticed that it was a young woman. A young woman, who has been shot, based from the fact that there was hole in her head. A hole that probably was caused by the gun she was holding in her hand. The other hand was clasped around a piece of paper, wich was very difficult to get out.

Yesterday I died, tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight
The future's open wide beyond believing
To know why hope dies

My name isn't important. You don't have to know it to understand me. It's enough if I tell you that I'm not myself anymore. My whole world fell apart when she died. Everything's worthless without her.

My life.

My work.

Even my way of thinking has changed. Once upon a time I was a hunter. A child, trained to be a killer. They've stolen my childhood and my family, so I early had to learn to shoot, to kill without thinking of the others and being emotionalless. Today, I am the haunted one, the one who is chased from place to place. The one, who can't sleep at night. I can't sleep anymore, because I hear her voice again and again – a voice, I will never ever hear again. I see her face – her face, wich is too naive, too good for this world – and again and again I can hear what she said to me, when I saw her the last time.

"I am well!"

This words are turning apart my heart again and again, they don't leave my head, don't leave me alone.

I am dead.

I've died, when Gin told me he has killed her. And then he laughed. He just laughed and I wasn't able to cry. I couldn't cry, when he told that she won't come again.

She.

Akemi.

My one and everything in the world.

Losing what was found, a world so hollow
Suspended in a compromise
The silence of this sound is soon to follow
Somehow sundown

I failed. I sweared to myself to protect Akemi in every situation on earth. I did protect her – till a few months ago. One time, only one single time I haven't been with her and that caused her death. She died in the arms of a young man, who should be dead too. But I don't mind about my obviously failed work. I don't care about that detective, who lives and solves cases like a machine, I don't even mind about him to queer Anokatas pitch.

I don't care about anything.

Akemi…

Since she has died, everything's silent. Silent and cold. Icecold. Since she has died, I can't feel anything anymore, there's only emptiness in my body.

Neverending emptiness.

And finding answers
Is forgetting all of the questions we call home
Passing the graves of the unknown

An answer.

I am looking for it since months, but I can't find it. I will never find it.

I just want a single answer! Why? Why did she had to die? Why her and not somebody else? Why didn't Gin sent someone else to death with his false promises?

With one strike everything is in my mind again. Everything I used to forget about since I am a little child.

My parents.

Dead.

Cold eyes, wich are looking into mine without any expression.

Arms that take me away, pull me away, away from my mother. From my mother, who is holding tight my father's hand.

Away from the blood that covers the floor and runs out of the lifeless bodys.

Away from everything that means protection, joy and home to me.

A scream.

A scream that isn't mine, but is coming out of my throat. I'm screaming all my sorrow and pain to the world that won't listen to me. But I can't scream as long as everything is forgotten and the pressure is taken from my weak shoulders. They're too weak to carry the weight of the world.

As reason clouds my eyes, with splendor fading
Illusions of the sunlight
And the reflection of a lie will keep me waiting
Love gone for so long

Love is a word I only know from being telled. You feel save when you're loved, they say. Most of my classmates that I only knew for one year, because I was changing class or school again, they often thaught, they would love. But after some weaks they were heartbroken. I don't know what I felt for Akemi or what I still feel for her. I would've done everything for her. If she had asked me to stop my research, I would've done it. I hadn't mind about the consequences as long as she was happy.

Tell me, is that love?

I don't know it.

They have lied to me my whole life. Anokata always told me that my parents wanted me and Akemi to become murderers.

To become killers.

To become deadhearted monsters.

This day's ending is the proof of time killing all the faith I know
Knowing that faith is all I hold

But Akemi has never been a monster. Never. She was too good for this hard, cold world and its cruel, selfish people. She was too good for Anokata and his mad ideas, wich caused somebodys dead. Every singel idea of him did. I don't know how to think about what I was doing. I had doubts about it the first time when Akemi and Rye got seperated with violence. I don't know the reason why, but Akemi cried day and night about her lost boyfriend. I was sixteen and I still hear her crying if I keep listening properly.

It hurted me to know that I wasn't able to help her, because I knew that no wonder of this world would be able to make her smile a little bit. I flew into my work and into my school work, because I didn't know what to do.

It was my anchor.

My last saving anchor. My work and my sister.

And I've lost who I am
And I can't understand
Why my heart is so broken
Rejecting your love
Without love gone wrong
Life
Less words
Carry on

I've lost myself. I've lost who I was.

Years ago, the little girl I used to be has died and someone else replaced her. Someone, who was able to kill without thinking of the consequences. Someone, who was able to handle guns and other dangerous weapons.

Sherry.

One of the most dangerous members of the organisation. And one of the most accurate members. If she killed someone, nobody was able to catch her for murdering – a skill that was even admired by Gin.

I don't admire anyone anymore.

Not Gin.

Not Anokata.

Not even Shinichi Kudou, who I had admired for his barefaced luck and his intelligence.

My heart is broken and the only one, who would be able to heal it has disappeared from my life. She is dead. For now and forever.

But I know
All I know
Is that the end's beginning

But something's still alive inside my soul.

Rage.

Hate.

The end will come.

My end.

Their end.

His end.

And I'm the one, who has to care for a painful end, an end that is embarrassing in his eyes.

Who I am from the start
Take me home to my heart
Let me go
And I will run
I will not be silenced

I wish I had a home.

I don't know, how often Akemi had said this sentence to me, but I still can hear it. I still can hear the desire in her voice, when I'm starring out of my window. I still can hear it at night, when I'm unable to sleep and don't want to sleep, because I know, what's going to happen. Because I know, my past will chase me in my dreams.

I want to forget everything that has happened, want to run away, to loose the plot, to run without turning around for one single time. I don't want to remember. I don't want to remember things that will turn apart wounds that never healed.

The death.

My parent's death.

My sister's death.

My living will's death.

All this time spent in vain
Wasted years
Wasted gain
All is lost
Hope remains
And this war's not over

I can't endure this anymore. I just can't endure this anymore, I don't know how to stand up when I'm knocked down. A few months ago, I would've stood up, would've continued living. But a few months ago she was alive. A few months ago I was sure to do the right thing.

Today I know that it was the worst thing I've ever done in my short life. Today I know that it was a mistake to trust Anokata.

He just had used me. Me and her. Me and Akemi. He alwys just had done what he wanted to do and what was for advantage to him.

And I was his card upon his sleeve, because nobody ever thaught of a teenager to murder. But I did. And I will alwayas be able to murder. If I want or not, killing is a part of me. Became a part of me when they tried to kill Akemi for the first time. I murdered her agressor. Without thinking of any consequences I killed him.

But I won't ever give up. Maybe he sent every single killer of the organisation after me and maybe he thinks to got an easy game, but that's only his wish. I'll put a spoke in his wheel, because this war is not over. No, it has just begun.

Theres a light
Theres the sun
Taking all the shattered ones
To the place we belong
And his love will conquer

The light. I don't like it for usual, I prefer the darkness, but I'm starting to understand, why Akemi loved the sun that much. It makes everything bright with its shiny light and everyone, who sees it has to smile. Even if it's only small smile, it is a smile. And sometimes it's healing wounds that have been open for ages. But I'm not sure if it is able to heal my wounds, because none of the scars that cover my back and my body have to be healed. My sole scars have to be healed.

The sole wounds that happened through my short life. That are turning apart my soul.

They happend because of his hate.

Because of his anger.

Because of the death that is gone along with me for my whole life.

Yesterday I died, tommorrows bleeding
Fall into your sunlight

I'm going to die. Not only inside. I'm stucking in a body that is going to die too.

Somewhen.

Somehow.

Somewhere.

I just don't know when, how and why it is going to die.

But I know that I have to do something first.

I have to fight.

For my mother.

For my father.

For my beloved sister, for Akemi.

For everything that means something to me.

I don't want you to forgive me. I don't want you to comprehend my motivations. I don't even want you to understand me.

But I want you to think.

I grew up in a world without love. I didn't had a choice. People often had an opportunity to help me, but they didn't. They just sat down and kept watching. Kept watching how the organisation slowly killed the child in me. And then they killed me. I want noone to have the same destiny I had. I want to know that I have lived in a world where children are still children and murderers are still murderers.

I want you to think.

I'm sure you want to know my name. The truth is: I don't have a name.

My name is meaningless.

Once upon a time my name was Miyano.

Shiho Miyano.