"Seriously, Charming?" I am getting really sick of this. First, David took me to this God-awful movie called, "Gun Day," then he takes me to this bowling alley (not that I have never bowled before), and now he takes me to a karaoke bar? Really? Charming grabs a seat at a table about ten feet from the bar. I roll my eyes. If I'm really going to go to these ridiculous places with Charming, I should at least be sitting at the bar. Well, they're gonna serve me rum so screw it! I grab a seat across from Charming. "Do you know how ridiculous this is, mate?"
"Well, mate, since you're dating my daughter, my wife decided that I should spend more time with you." I let out a heavy sigh. "So, I sail the rough seas, trade my ship for a magic bean, and deal with the toil of transporting to another land for this?" David rolls his eyes and sits back in his seat. "Oh, Hook. You gotta learn to loosen up, dude." What did Charming just call me? What a scallywag! "So, what are we going to be doing at this karaoke bar?" Oh, I'd like to hear this! "Well, we're going to sit here and get to know each other, and then one of us is going to go up there and sing." Sing? Really? "Alright, mate. Let's have a bet." I lean towards him. "You and I are going to make a bet and whoever loses has to go up there and sing!"
"A bet?" I pull the pouch from my pocket and open it up. I spill two pairs of dice onto the table. "Do you know what this is called, mate?"
"Pirate Dice?"
"Aye." I spot a waitress serving the table right next to me. A tall and thin brunette wearing a white blouse and a black skirt so short it exposes her toned limbs. That is one fine wench! "Excuse me, lass!" The waitress whips her head around and cocks her brow. "Excuse me?"
"May you bring us two cups, please?" She plants her hands on her hips. "First of all, asshole, I have a name. Second of all, I am serving someone so wait your goddamn turn Captain Jack Sparrow!" She returns her attention to the customers that she was just serving. How rude! I turn and notice Prince Charming's look of disapproval. "Dude, really?"
"Don't ever call me that again, mate! What the hell is her problem?"
"This isn't the Enchanted Forest, Captain, which means you don't call people 'lass'!"
"Is it an offensive term or something?"
"Just don't go around calling people 'lass'?"
"Why not?"
"It's just not normal!" I roll my eyes. Not normal? Seriously? And who the hell is Captain Jack Sparrow? "I will get you your cups, sir," the waitress says before marching over to the bar. About damn time. "So, are you ready to lose, mate?"
"Ready when you are." I smirk at him. I am so going to beat him, and he's going to be up there embarrassing himself! The waitress sits two cups in the center of our table. "Thank you." The waitress rolls her eyes and stomps. "That girl needs an attitude check," I hear David mutter.
"Aye!" I turn towards David. "You ready, mate?" I take two dices. He takes two for himself. We grab the cups, turn them upside down, and place them over the dice. We place our hands under the table and then use the other to slide the cups to the end of the table. The dice spills onto the palm of my hand. We roll. I check under my cup and notice that I have two sixes, three fives, and a two. "Two fives," I bid. "Liar!" I reveal my dice to him. "Oh crap!" I laugh at him. "Knock 'em dead, mate."
"How about I knock you dead, mate?" he mutters before heading over to the platform up front. I lean back in my chair and watch as he grabs the microphone from the DJ and selects a song. It seems like just yesterday when I didn't even know what a microphone or a DJ was. He walks onto the stage (well, a platform) and puts the device to his lips. "Hello, everyone. My name is David." The crowd applauses. He shyly smiles. "And I will be singing a song called 'You Give Love A Bad Name' by Bon Jovi." People begin clapping, whistling, and making whooping noises. The music starts.
Shot through the heart and you're to blame
Darlin', you give love a bad name
My eyes disappear into my hairline. He sounds pretty good. Amazing, to be honest. He removes his jacket, revealing a white V-neck that's snug around his muscular torso. I am not looking at him.
An angel's smile is what you sell
You promise me heaven then you put me through hell
Chains of love got a hold on me
When passion's a prison, you can't break free
Oh, you're a loaded gun
Oh, there's nowhere to run
No one can save me, the damage is done
Shot through the heart and you're to blame
You give love a bad name
I play my part and you play your game
You give love a bad name
Yeah, you give love….a bad name
He gives me this devilish smirk, followed by a wink. Okay. What is happening here? What is he doing? My cheeks turn really hot. Look away, Hook. Look away right now. I could feel the warm blood in my body migrating to the south side. Why? What is he doing to me? From my peripheral vision, I could see his hands sliding down the microphone stand.
Paint your smile on your lips
Blood red nails on your fingertips
A schoolboy's dream, you act so shy
Your very first kiss was your kiss goodbye
Whoa oh, you're a loaded gun
He winks again. Why is he torturing me like this? He starts to sweat. Why is my heart jumping to my throat? My palms begin to feel very wet. I cross my legs, trying to suppress the warmth that's spreading to my lower region. Is it hot in here or is it just him? I mean, me. I mean, what?
Shot the heart and you're to blame
You give love a bad name
He sweeps his tongue over his lower lip before he presumes to sing. I cannot even move from my spot. I'm just looking at him. My eyes are burning. Seriously, what is he doing? What am I doing? Why did he bring me here? I hate this bastard so much. Oy vey! Is he kidding me? The waitress comes back. "Do you need anything?"
"A shot of whiskey would be good for me, love." She struts off. I didn't even look at her once because my eyes were fixated on him, and they still are. I can barely breathe. A few small strands of hair cling to his sweaty forehead. He has this intense look in his eye. Its like he is being possessed by this song that he's singing. It's like the music is making love to him. Oh, God! That did not just cross my mind. What is wrong with me? I should cover my eyes. My hand can't even move. He dips the microphone and gets one knee. Damn! That was so… No! This is not happening! I love Emma Swan! Grr! I hate this man so much! Why am I watching him? Why am I paralyzed? I swear to God he brought me here to torture me.
You give love…. a bad name!
The minute the song ends, the crowd cheers. A few women throw their undergarments at him. Really? Wait, why does that piss me off? He turns, bends over, picks his jacket off the floor, steps off the stage and heads towards me. He bites his lower lip and then licks it. Man, why did that though cross my mind? I am disgusting. I need to be punished. By him, please! Wait, what? I think one shot of whiskey was a little much! He takes a seat across from me. "What did you think?"
"I thought it was alright." 'Alright' does not even begin to describe what I thought about that performance. Where the hell did he learn to sing like that? He cocks his brow at me…. just to make my life a lot more complicated than it already is. He is a lot more evil than the evil queen! "Just good?" Man, why did he have to say it like that? Damn scallywag! "You ready to go, Captain?"
"Ready when you are, mate." He smiles and reaches into his jacket pocket. He tosses a crisp twenty-dollar bill onto the table before heading out of the bar. Seriously? I sigh and get out of my seat before following him out the door.