Disclaimer:… if I owned—no I NEVER WILL OWN NARUto or the matrix. I added inFLECtion to my voice! Yay

Summary: Brought back from The Vault of The Matrix, Neo returns to The Matrix now to with a new purpose, only this time, it's the Naruto Universe!

Warning: This fic is confusing at first, so abandon all sensibility for this chapter

Howdy!! First Fic 4 me!! Yay!! Anyway, rxr (or not), and all that goodstuff, now onward to the ficcy!!

White

Lots and lots of white. I have no idea how long I have been here, only that there is white. It's indescribable really. All is white, I am white, my body is white, and… there is nothing more…

Pain…the pain is coursing up what would be my arm, although it is part of the white as well, so where exactly is the pain acting on. It doesn't matter. I remember… the time before white, my brief existence in one world and my everlasting existence in the other. A balance between the mundane and the other-worldly, the body and spirit. Balance… what a word to describe my life, or more so my past life. But really, I can't be sure, for I believe that I only can remember half of it, the other half, well… is currently being added to my already vast stores of knowledge. Not that I am the all-seeing, all-knowing Kami. Wait, Kami? Is that a word? Oh, apparently where I'm going it is… a new wonderful language to learn. If I could cough as in my old life, I would at this point, and also add under my breath 'Sarcasm is a wonderful thing.' Yes, I was very talented. Ah.. the pain is gone now, as well as the confusion and questions. Where am I, I ask? The answer is now very clear.

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Brown eyes stared ahead into the forest canopy, shielded by a pair of black reflective sunglasses. As the eyes stared upward, they conveyed air of nonchalance and blankness. As the eyes looked forward, they widened as if to say 'ah ha! Epiphany!' For these eyes had come to a startling conclusion: there was a head behind those eyes, and an emotionally intelligent one at that. For what kind of mind could speak so brilliantly with its eyes. 'But enough boasting,' the mind thought. And with that, the mind became instantly re-accustomed with the rest of its wonderful body, and sat up. He was surrounded by what appeared to be a vast amount of green.

'Green… so much green… I see, forest?'

And after discovering that he was, indeed, in a forest, his mind went blank for a few seconds, still having to become reacquainted with the fact that it had to think for itself now, and not rely on a machine to do its work.

Damn he hated this.

Why now? After all these...days? Months? Years? The time he was a part of White seemed to be endless, and yet, here he was, beginning at the end of his White. Wait, his White? What the hell, now he was being over-possessive, and of what? None other than the White. Hell, he didn't even know what the white was, it could be representative life, or death, or even some other crazy—

'Shut the fuck up!'

Neo yelled at his mind's self-portrait. Damn, how he really wished this migraine would disappear. And why the hell did he have to yell at picture to get his mind to silence itself? Why couldn't he just picture himself ruthlessly slaughtering hundreds of SWAT teams with his fists, or even—

'Focus, Neo, Don't let a stupid painting drive your crazy! You fucking created your RSI, you became The One, and managed to save your wonderful home Zion, so you better damn well be able to keep your mind focused!'

Neo decided that if talking to oneself was a sign of insanity, then he could qualify for the most crazy-ass person in any of the many insane asylums that resided within the Metropolis. Speaking of which, where the hell was he in the Metropolis? He couldn't remember even being to a dense, overgrown park before, meaning that either A. The Architect had decided that the environment must be saved! B. He was no longer in Metropolis, or C. He was slowly losing his mind due to his obvious over-dependency to the maintenance machines in The Vault.

Since a mind usually required high levels of maintenance and a constant flow of 'Brain food' as Neo liked to call it, the mind tended to wane in its ability to be self-sufficient and instead began to depend on The Machines for survival. A dastardly strategy used by the machines frequently on the minds of humans who were useful and thus necessary to contain for further probing.

With these three distinct possibilities in mind, he decided to screw all method of questioning and get the hell out of this humid tangle of trees, bushes, and other forms of plant life, the quickest way possible. With this in mind, he began to FOCUS

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At this point, Neo's mind decided to throw an Error Message the size of gargantuan mass of buildings, cars, signs, etc. loosely strung together to form something resembling a certain former agent(1). Thus, Neo was (mentally) flung across his mindscape like a rag doll and broke a few mental ribs when he crashed into a conveniently placed building that stood between him and the infinite space that might be his mind.

This time, Neo decided to utter one word to summarize exactly what he was feeling at that specific moment in time: "OWWWADUFUCKWASTHATYOUSTUPIDSONSABITCHMIND." Now, this word may not have an entry in the many of the glorious, self-proclaimed, largest dictionaries in the worldof the Matrix, but we can roughly summarize what happened in that moment in which Neo tried to Superman: the pain of Neo's migrane increased 20 fold, this pain being equivalent to having your genitals being ripped out via a hand shoved up your ass, followed by experiencing the Mangekyou Sharingan, which would allow you to relive this experience for the equivalent of 3 years time.

Of course, being the powerful figure Neo is, he was able to stand up to this kind of pain and claim afterward that it had been as if someone tickled his mind coughcockyassliarcough, metaphorically speaking. Unfortunately however, what Neo did not anticipate, however, was that his scream would attract the attention of about 15 heavily armored masked… things, he couldn't tell if they were human, only that they were humanoid, to his current position. Due to the fact that Neo had currently experienced a pain like no other, and his mind was currently on the mental floorboards of its shabby mental apartment, bleeding to death because of two telltale red slash marks on its arms, signifying that his mind was vainly trying to commit mental suicide, he was in no position but to do one thing which he hadn't done in 1000 years:

Faint

(1): I HATE the ending to The Matrix:PON video game, sorry to fans of it, but I couldn't resist!

THAT'S IT!! Rxr if u want!! Me gusta!! Flames will be used to heat my marshmallows!!