A/N: Hey readers
Oh BTW, I've only just found out that xXNotBrokenXx has wrote a fic SIMULAR to this and with the same name.
I did not copy!
It is totally different alright?
So don't flame me!
I've apologised to her on her deviantART page so if you don't believe me then go on it!
Okay?
Just wanna say that this is co-written with chipmunklover17 so yeah give him credit too C=
I've been thinking about writing a fic like this for ages but never got round to it until now xD
So enjoy!
"Okay now class, settle down," Mr. Garrison said to the bored looking teenagers, "As I got promoted to teach 10th grade health class, that means I'm stuck with you little bastards."
The entire class groaned.
"I'm happy that you sound so enthusiastic!" Mr. Garrison said sarcastically, "Now if some of you can remember in 4th grade you had to look after an egg and take care of it like it was a baby?"
The class nodded.
"Well," Mr. Garrison continued, "For this week I am going to pair you up and you will both have to look after one of these," Mr. Garrison went over to his desk which had a cardboard box on it, he got out a life-like baby doll out of it.
"Are you serious?" Stan asked.
"Great. We have to play 'Mommies and Daddies' for a week." muttered Kenny.
"Now, these dolls cry, drink milk and wet themselves, just like a real baby. Now I will know if you have been neglecting your baby so don't think I wont know if you just ignore it for the week okay? Oh and the couples have to live with each over for a week as that is how long the project will go on for. You can sort out who is staying with who amongst yourselves. Now then I'm going to pair you up… now as there are more boys than girls in this class, there will be two gay couples…"
"Please don't pair me with Butters. Please don't pair me with Butters." Cartman muttered.
"Okay now Token you will be partnered with Red." Mr. Garrison said.
Wendy glared at Red for a moment, "Boyfriend stealer." she said to her.
Mr. Garrison handed Token and Red their baby, "Okay, Pip and Millie… Timmy and Jennifer… Clyde and Heidi… Damien and Powder…" Mr. Garrison handed all the couples their babies.
Cartman groaned at the remaining students left, he decided that if he had to be with one of them then it would have to be Bebe.
"Okay now Kenny you are with Bebe." Mr. Garrison said, Kenny cheered.
"Kenny you poor asshole I hate you!" Cartman yelled.
"Fuck you Fatass." Kenny replied, grinning at Bebe… well her boobs.
"Okay now Butters, you are paired with… Annie." Mr. Garrison said.
"YES! YES! YES!" Cartman cheered and got up and started dancing.
"Eric Cartman shut up and sit down!" Mr. Garrison yelled, "Now Eric you are paired with Wendy."
"WHAT?" Cartman and Wendy yelled at the same time.
"Mr. Garrison I can not be paired with HIM!" Wendy complained.
"And I am not being paired with that whiney bitch!" Cartman yelled.
"Shut up and sit down and take your baby!" Mr. Garrison yelled.
Wendy picked up hers and Cartman's baby, scowling the whole time, then sat down.
"Okay, now for the gay couples. Craig you're with Tweek and Stan you're with Kyle."
Tweek smiled at his boyfriend, Craig and went to go pick up his baby, then sat down next to Craig who smiled and kissed his twitchy boyfriend's cheek, causing him to blush.
Kyle blushed when he heard Mr. Garrison say that him and Stan were paired together as for a few months he had developed a huge crush on his 'super best friend', however he could not tell him due to fear of rejection, and knowing that Stan was straight…
Stan smiled inwardly to himself, he quickly tried to hide his smile as Kyle turned around to head back towards him with their 'Baby' in his arms.
Cartman looked over at the two same-sex couples, smiling gleefully and at the top of his voice he yelled, "FAGS!"
Stan and Kyle just rolled their eyes and turned their backs to him, Craig flipped him off and Tweek twitched, and Bebe yelled out from behind him, "Shut up you fat arse-hole you just woke my baby up!"
At Tweek's house, Tweek and Craig were sat cuddled up on Tweek's bed, the 'baby' in Craig's arms.
"So what are we gonna call her?" Craig asked.
"Lauren sounds nice." Tweek suggested, smiling.
Craig smiled back, "Lauren it is." and then kissed Tweek gently on the lips…
At Bebe's house, Bebe was sat on her bed, holding her 'daughter' and Kenny was sat gazing at Bebe's Beyoncé and Lady GaGa posters, "Is Lady GaGa a boy or a girl? Or is she both… no wait is IT both?" Kenny laughed.
Bebe rolled her eyes at him, "What are we going to call our daughter then?"
"I dunno… Katie or Jordan?" Kenny grinned.
"No fucking way!" Bebe argued, "We are NOT naming our daughter after HER!"
Kenny laughed, "I'm joking! Jeez!"
Bebe looked down at her baby, she was pretty, for a doll, she had blue eyes and blonde hair, she looked strangely a lot like Bebe and Kenny, "What about Olivia?" she suggested.
Kenny smiled, "Okay then. Baby Olivia." and he took the baby from Bebe and kissed it on its forehead. Bebe wrapped her arms around Kenny's waist and rested her head on his shoulder as she watched him holding their 'baby' …
"NO FUCKING WAY, WE ARE NOT CALLING HIM THAT!" Wendy screamed at Cartman
"Aw you fucking bitch, it's a great name, a true historical figure." Cartman tried to argue.
"No it's not, it's racist and evil and we are not calling him that!" Wendy told him
"Ok, ok, ok we'll call him Mel then" Cartman sighed
"No we are NOT, he is no worse than Hitler, he is another racist and a bigot and to be honest his movies are shit!" Wendy argued, intentionally winding Cartman up,
"WHAT? Shut up bitch, you don't know what your talking about." Cartman spluttered.
"Eric, don't make me kick your ass AGAIN!" Wendy snapped, throwing a hairbrush at Cartman, it hit him square on the nose and he started to moan and whine which was enough to set their baby off, Wendy stared daggers at Cartman while she hugged and soothed their baby in a bid to stop him crying.
"We are calling him Steven and that's the end of it." Wendy told him.
Sat in Stan's bedroom, the pair were still trying to think of a name for their 'daughter'. Kyle was holding her whilst Stan was looking through a "Baby Names" book.
"Jennifer?" Stan suggested.
Kyle smiled. He liked it, "Sure," he looked at the doll, "Hey Jennifer, this is your daddy."
Stan smirked, "Getting attached already are you?" but he couldn't help going all soppy over the doll too, introducing himself as Jennifer's 'other daddy'.
Shelley walked into their room to see what all the noise was about, she was met by the sight of Stan and Kyle sat on Stan's bed, with an open 'baby names' book on the floor and Stan and Kyle just cooing and babbling cutely over their new daughter, "OH MY GOD, you two are FAGS" Shelley laughed, Stan rolled his eyes at his older sister.
"Shut up Shel." Stan sighed as Kyle looked away from Shelley
"HAHAHA! You two are playing with dolls just like fags" Shelley continued to taunt and again Stan told her to shut up and go away, Shelley walked over to Stan and slapped him hard across his cheek ,"DON'T TALK TO ME LIKE THAT YOU FUCKTARD LITTLE TURD" she yelled in his face, she continued to taunt them for the next five minutes until Kyle decided he had enough of listening to her and got up to walk away.
"KYLE DON'T LEAVE ME HERE ALONE WITH THE BABY" Stan yelled out to him as Kyle made his way downstairs, the last thing Stan heard was his front door open then get slammed shut again and then all Stan could hear was Shelley still sniggering from her bedroom.
"Now look what you've done, Shelley!" Stan growled as he picked up the baby and ran after Kyle. Being a faster runner than Kyle, he caught up with him pretty quickly.
"Maybe we should stay at yours?" Stan suggested.
"Yeah, it would be better." Kyle smiled.
The pair went back to Stan's house, collected their belongings and walked together to Kyle's house…