Arthur sometimes wondered if it would be better to forget. It was hard enough trying to remember material for classes, people's birthdays appointments, and other important matters. Add in several lifetimes worth of memories and it was a wonder he could function at all.

Some lifetimes were certainly more memorable than others. Arthur really has to think to remember his life during Victorian England. He could almost recall everything from the time he helped establish Jamestown. His most recent life during which he had fought in World War II was too vivid in his mind, often resulting in nightmares. It wasn't uncommon for him to get an angry knock on his dorm because he had woken up his suitemate with his screaming. Of course those nightmare had more less to do with the war and more to do with Him-

No. He didn't want to think about Him, right now.

Arthur took a sip of his coffee and blanched. He hated the taste, but he needed something to keep him awake. Midterms were coming up next week and he had yet to even glance at his notes. He opened one of his notebooks and began to scan the pages. However it did him little as his mind began to wander again.

"Penny for your thoughts?" asked a quiet voice.

Arthur lifted his eyes to see one of the baristas standing in front of him.

She was very pretty with her curly hair, dark skin, and eyes that always seemed very kind.

"Hello, Gwen," he replied, a little more morose than he had intended.

She frowned and Arthur couldn't help but notice that she scrunched up her nose as she did. "What's wrong?"

"Studying," he lied. He didn't want to upset her by letting her know that her mere presence made him sad. After all it wasn't her fault she couldn't remember.

"Do you mind if I sit and distract you? I'm on my break."

He forced a smile and nodded. Gwen sat and looked at the textbook closest to her and raised an eyebrow.

"Arthurian legend? Didn't you take this last term?"

Arthur blushed. "I might have failed and had to retake it."

Gwen giggled. "Yes, Lance did mention you fought with the professor about everything."

Arthur felt a small pang of hurt at the mention of Lancelot, but for Gwen's benefit he showed no reaction. "Well, he got it all wrong."

"You're so silly sometimes, Arthur. It's all just a story, after all." Gwen laughed.

"Yeah, I suppose so." He stood up abruptly, making Gwen jump. "Sorry, I should be going."

"Oh, okay," responded Gwen as Arthur gathered up his books. She sounded confused, making him feel guilty, but he just needed to get away and clear his head.

"See you around." She kissed him on the cheek for goodbye. "Take care."

"Careful, Lance might not like that," Arthur stated, pulling away.

Gwen rolled her eyes at that. "He knows nothing's between us." The unspoken words You've made that quite clear hung in the air. Arthur nodded and mumbled his goodbye before leaving.

As he walked he thought back to all his childhood memories with Gwen. In this lifetime they had grown up next door to one another and it had been evident from the start that she had been besotted with him. Arthur wasn't surprised. Gwen had once been his queen and for the first lifetimes he had reciprocated her feelings. But over the years as it became apparent she would never remember, he pulled away, refusing to be with her. His feelings began to dwindle and he became content only being friends. Besides he had a suspicion that she and Lance were destined to be together. Once he no longer sought her out , the two of them had grown closer in each lifetime until eventually they had ended up together. Arthur had been to two of their weddings and there was no denying that Gwen and Lance had more love for one another than he'd have with her.

Deep in his thoughts, Arthur didn't notice he had bumped in to someone.

"Hey, watch it," snapped a voice, passing by him.

Arthur didn't hear him and continued to walk towards his dorm. It wasn't until he had dropped down on his bed, did he realize that something felt different. What it was, he couldn't fathom, yet he knew something had happened.

Arthur shook his head and reached over to turn on his music. He turned the volume up until it hurt his ears, but he left it like, hoping to drown out his thoughts.

How long he just lay there, he didn't know. He closed his eyes, willing himself to forget without success.

He didn't understand how everything had ended up the way it had. He had died numerous times, lived many lives. And every time he remembered. Not always at first, but he always did. This time it had been when he was fifteen. He'd been having strange dreams for months, when finally something inside of him broke and they all came flooding out.

It was always difficult when he remembered. To be honest it almost felt like dying. Once he knew he was the legendary Arthur, his current personality and life began to get lost among the memories. His current self disappeared as Arthur the King returned.

Some of his current reincarnation's personality did remain, meshing with his old self. Yet he still hated that in the next life the same thing would happen again. It was the worst part of the cycle.

Well, second worst part, when he thought about it.

The worst part was finding his old friends and having none of them remember.

No matter what life he lived he always found Gwen and his Knights. And every life not one of them remembered their pasts. Not even He remembered.

There had been only one exception. And it had ended in disaster.

Arthur figured someone must have cursed him. How else could he explain this never ending torment of being alone? Sure his friends were there, but in a way they weren't, stuck in their reincarnations.

It was even worse when it came to one person.

Arthur always remembered his Camelot life as clear as crystal.

With one exception.

He felt as if someone had taken scissor and cut this person from his life. He remembered all the moments they shared together, all the adventures, all the foes fought, even all the insults slung back and forth.

But for the life of him he couldn't remember the face, the voice, or even the name. When he tried everything was blurry and distorted.

And Arthur wouldn't remember these details until he found Him. Once the two had met in the current life, the pieces would be put back together in his memories. It made no sense, but that was the way it always was.

And always would be.

Arthur had no idea how to break the cycle and he desperately wanted to.

For it never failed that each life something horrific would happen and Arthur could do nothing to stop it.

And almost always, that horrific thing involved Him.

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