Everyone has those stories.
You know, the one where a beautiful man takes your breath away and in that moment he realises you're destined to be The One?
Of course you do - we've all heard them endlessly. Heck, I hear them from my girlfriends any given Sunday as we sip coffees that eventually turn cold whilst we sit and dissect our disastrous dating lives. Or maybe it's just my dating life that's plain disastrous. I've never really been one to be all that fussed about whether or not I'm in a relationship as, quite frankly, I've always found animals far more interesting than humans. Thanks to my profession however, I've never had a shortage of men trying to get into my pants. No. Before you ask - I'm not a stripper. My mother would kill me.
Yet all that aside, I've never had that one wonderful story to call my own. It just never works out for me. Somehow, I effortlessly remain the most awkward human on the planet, and in the process, scare off any chance of red-hot romance through my own goofy behaviour.
So don't be fooled. This isn't your average love story, if I'm involved. It's more a series of unfortunate, ridiculous events that led to where I am today.