WHY DID THIS HAPPEN? WHY DID I WRITE THIS? I DON'T KNOW. FORGIVE ME.

This was written in thirty minutes. I blame my exam-melted brain for ALL OF IT.

Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. I do not profit from this story.

Shotgun

It really shouldn't be so surprising that Inuyasha is giving her that look again, the one that means he's frustrated and more than a little confused. Kagome gets it, really she does, but sometimes men just need to learn things on their own. It's not like she wanted to explain it to him in excessive detail or anything.

"What do you mean you don't want the wine?" He was looking wary now, big golden eyes narrowed. "Is this a trick?"

And Kagome wanted to laugh at that. Really, she did. Because of course anything that wasn't normal Kagome-deemed behaviour meant there was trouble. A lot of trouble that he usually ran away from, and Kagome didn't want that.

No, she didn't want that tonight.

Her lack-of-answer made Inuyasha look around the kitchen. There were candles lit in the middle of the small two-person table. The oven was humming with dinner. The radio played softly in the background. To save his life, Inuyasha couldn't figure out what was wrong.

He frowned. "Today is August 31st, right? I didn't make that up?"

"It's the 31st Inuyasha, I don't know why you're making such a big deal out of this," Kagome said, shaking her head and trying to hide her smile. "I know it's our anniversary, but you don't have to act like one wrong move will make the world blow up."

"Technically, with you, anything's possible," Inuyasha replied, smirking as he re-corked the wine bottle. "So what do you want to drink then? Rum and coke, or something girly that I hate making?"

Kagome gave him a pointed look before sighing and turning towards the oven. Their dinner was almost done and while she was more than happy to snuggle up to her boyfriend of four years and just watch movies, eat delicious food and make love, the stay-at-home bit was making it difficult to avoid some things that she didn't want to talk about…yet. "Water would be awesome."

Inuyasha was staring at her. She could practically feel the holes he was boring into her. "I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just ask for water?"

"Water is a perfectly good option, Inuyasha," Kagome replied offhandedly, grabbing the oven mitts and removing the food. "Why can't you just get me water?"

"Because you don't drink water."

"Clearly I do."

"But you don't."

"Well I would drink it if someone would get a glass for me."

Inuyasha didn't buy it. "What, are you going to be secretly driving me anywhere later? We can just take a cab."

She almost wished she was. Then it would be a perfectly easy excuse for her to use. The problem was that now he was already arguing against it. And she sucked at lying. Inuyasha was always extremely good at reading her. Apparently, she had a face. "No, I just want water."

"Bullshit." Inuyasha walked across the kitchen, stopping just outside of her space and crossing his arms rather indignantly. "We always celebrate with wine and now suddenly, you don't want wine. What is your deal?"

"My deal?" Kagome wanted to smack her head into the kitchen counter. How come something so little would be such a big deal? This was not the right time! "Fine, I'll have a coke."

"With rum?"

"Inuyasha, we've been together for years. I'm pretty positive sex is a sure thing now, you don't need the alcohol-induced backup."

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes. "So no rum."

"No rum."

"Why?"

Kagome groaned, whipping around and pointing an angry finger at him. Only, it didn't look so angry because her massive oven mitt was hiding it. It just looked like she was shaking a big red and purple-dotted glove at him. "Really Inuyasha, you're going to make a big deal about nothing on our anniversary? Can't you let something go?"

The smirk came easy to his lips. "I'm sorry. Do you know me at all?"

"You are hopeless," Kagome whined, taking off the mitt and throwing it at his face. It didn't make her feel better, especially when he caught it by just lifting his hand casually. It was like he saw it coming from a mile away. "Fine, if you're that pushy, I'll have a rum and coke."

Inuyasha smiled. "That's the spirit. You have to celebrate properly Kagome and we have to cheers to something, right?"

Kagome gave him a small smile and nodded, turning away to hide what was probably an expression akin to horror. It got even worse when she was finished filling their plates with food, and they were both sitting at the table with drinks in hand.

Reaching over, the golden-eyed man clinked their glasses and smiled genuinely, looking utterly pleased with himself. "Happy four years."

Kagome laughed and repeated it, waiting as he lifted to drink whatever bottle he had cracked open. She herself lifted the glass, tilting it to her lips but not touching a drop. As long as Inuyasha didn't look too closely–

"You really thought I wasn't going to watch you, didn't you?" Inuyasha asked, grinning. Of course he'd be pleased with himself about this. Only her boyfriend could get such satisfaction. Only she could have gone out with someone who would pay that much attention. Kagome always knew she should've gone for the dumb ones.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Kagome replied, trying to ignore him in favour for their delicious meal. She had outdone herself this time, she thought to herself. Considering it wasn't black, she called it a huge win.

"You didn't drink any," Inuyasha stated, grabbing her glass of rum and coke and swirling it. "What's going on with you?"

And then he did it: the puppy eyes. Kagome noticeably twitched, hands itching on her jeans to do something distracting. She had never really won against those and Inuyasha knew it, the sly bastard. "Stop looking at me like that." The words came out like a snap, not at all the way she meant it, and instantly Inuyasha was frowning. He looked more than a little worried, eyes once again searching around the kitchen for signs that he'd missed something.

Kagome wished he didn't have to look like that. "It's got nothing to do with you," she said quickly, trying to calm him down. "I swear you've made everything perfect."

"But you were the one when you planned this evening months ago that said you wanted wine," Inuyasha pointed out, looking directly at her with those intense gold eyes. "And now you didn't want any. So I figured that maybe you were worried about something and wanted the good stuff – obviously not. So please, tell me what the hell is going on?" His words got more clipped as they spilled out, his jaw clenching with his effort not to yell. Kagome had learned a long time ago what Inuyasha's expressions were, but she couldn't do anything about it, not now.

Although sitting in the stiff chair, with Inuyasha's gaze on her, made her fidget wildly. Her mouth opened and closed several times, words desperate to come out but not quite there. It's not the time, Kagome reminded herself. Because she had it planned. She had the whole thing set up in this pretty little world she created. Ever since she knew, Kagome came up with the perfect way to do it.

Only now, Inuyasha was completely and totally destroying it. She shouldn't be surprised. Inuyasha was nothing if not the master of getting his own way. It probably didn't help that she enabled him. She blamed it on his good looks and the fact that she (miraculously) loved him.

As if he could hear her thoughts, his gaze softened. His rough hand reached across the table, palm outwards to touch her and slowly Kagome intertwined their fingers. "Can't you tell me what's going on?" he asked gently, tilting his head in question.

It's now or never, she thought. Taking a deep breath, Kagome squeezed his hand. "So, I had a plan you see. Ever since I found out a week ago that this was going on, I kind of started to plan some things. Okay, a lot of things. Like after dinner we'd–"

Inuyasha held up his hand and raised a brow.

Kagome groaned. "Just, I had a plan, okay? And it was perfect and you are ruining it."

"What was the plan?" he asked warily, eyes skirting slightly to the sides, as if he expected something dangerous to pop out. "Kagome, you're scaring me."

Now, now, now, now. "I'm pregnant."

Inuyasha blinked.

It wasn't entirely discouraging, so Kagome rambled on. "You know, sometimes things happen and I told you Inuyasha, that just because something says 99% effective does not actually mean it is effective. And this is proof, because right now there's this baby bean growing inside of me. And I found out a week ago after I realized I wasn't bleeding– Don't look so alarmed, I'm talking about my period. And then after a few days I still didn't have it so I got a test because, why not? And then it was positive. So I bought seven more boxes and tried it again. And they were mostly positive. So I think I'm pregnant. And there's a bean inside of me, growing. And I like the bean. Well, so far I like the bean. The bean hasn't caused me morning sickness yet, but there's still a few weeks until that settles in. But the bean is cute. I think. I can't really tell but so far–"

"Kagome–"

" –all I can think about are baby shoes and baby pyjamas and ooh, isn't that a cute baby that's giggling in the shopping cart beside me? So I think to myself–"

"Kagome–"

" –that our little bean, when it's not a bean, will be just as awesome and cute. With your fuzzy ears and amazing eyes, and my hair, we'd make one killer of a kid. And–"

"Stop talking!"

Kagome abruptly closed her mouth, trying to smile but more or less failing at it. Oh no, maybe that website lied and the morning sickness was going to start right now at five-thirty-two p.m.

"We're having a baby?" Inuyasha asked slowly, enunciating each word like it was life or death.

Shrugging, and then realizing that really wasn't an answer, Kagome nodded. "I'm pretty sure we are…yes."

"And this is why you're currently hyperventilating." It was a fact, not a question.

Kagome winced. "I'm not hyperventilating. I'm excited, and maybe a teeny, tiny bit nervous."

"This is also the reason you didn't want wine and wanted water."

"Yes," she said, sighing. "Now do you get it? I wanted to make it a bit more romantic than blurting it out over our food – which is getting cold by the way and I didn't burn the meat this time so you're missing out."

"Kagome?"

Letting a tiny smile show, she attempted to look meek and adorable. Meek and adorable more or less won a date with Inuyasha in the first place, and got her boyfriend to whisper 'I love you' on their first out-of-town trip together. She hoped it could still be that simple.

"Can we call him something awesome?"

"Him? What makes you think it's a him?" Kagome demanded, slowly realizing as she said it that Inuyasha had a huge, stupid grin on his face. He was happy and finally she could breathe again. "It's a her," she went on needlessly, "and I'll bet money right now she'll have you wrapped around her tiny little finger."

Inuyasha scoffed. "I'm not wrapped around anyone's fingers."

Finally able to smile freely, Kagome slid back in the chair a bit and stood up. They could reheat the food later. Right now… She headed towards the hallway, making sure that before she disappeared from view, she beckoned him with her finger, motioning for him to follow to a room he knew very well.

Inuyasha stared at her, in something that looked a whole lot like awe. When he didn't move, Kagome raised a brow and flitted away, knowing that he'd come running any minute.

When a strangled curse filled the apartment and there was the sound of a chair being knocked over onto the ground, Kagome grinned.

Inuyasha may be in denial now, but she was more than a little sure that by the time the baby came around, her gorgeous boyfriend would be dancing like a puppet. And Kagome thought it would suit him just perfectly.

I don't know. Really. No clue.

Sorry? :)