Author note: This story is solely based on slayers, my own thoughts and the loveless poem and interpretation (I show parts of it in some chapters but the story doesn't follow the poem all the time. But somewhere in the verses is a clue to the chapter) I do not bring the poem into the story except twice when I believe the words are much better said inside the story. It not a written poem that was published so no worries.

Disclaimer: I do not own slayers or Final Fantasy 7: Crisis Core where the poem originated.

When the war of the beasts brings about the world's end

The goddess descends from the sky

Wings of light and dark spread afar

She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting


Pain. She was no foreigner to the feeling. It was like torture every night. She would sweat in the coldness of the night, stretching her limbs trying to reach some way to stop the illness racking her body. She did not know its name. It is disastrous to not know who the enemy is. She only knew its effects and no way to cure it. Holding on to her stomach her parched lips opened with the need to drink once more. She could not understand the amount of water she had begun to consume. Looking down at the floor of discarded water glasses, she knew something must be done. First she would need to soothe her stomach and the only way she knew was some nice herbal tea. She tiredly crawled from underneath her covers, her body drenched in sweat. Her tail limply dragged on the floor as she found no way to cover it up anymore. She was too weak but she had to get to the kitchen. The stairs became her enemy as she stumbled down them in the darkness. Feeling her way to the kitchen, she found a small oil lamp. She lit it and begun her search.

However, while looking through the cupboards she soon realized she was out of ginger. Anguish took over her as she fell to her knees. Why was she to suffer? It had only been a year after the dark star and she needed her strength. Val had already hatched. He was just a wyrmling and she had to care for him. No other person could care for a dragon baby. No other person knew how to keep him warm or even think he was a baby! The dragon was sleeping curled in his bed. If she were to leave she would have to come quickly. Why was she thinking of leaving?

Another sharp pain stabbed her side. How was she to go on? Were the gods punishing her? For what? Finding her raincoat she made her way outside. There had to be a doctor somewhere. Even a doctor who knew nothing about dragons would be of some help. She had to get to him quick. Her rationality knew that no human doctor of the outer world could help her but she was desperate.

Raining, it was always raining when she needed to go somewhere. If this wasn't proof that the gods hated her, she had no idea what was! Wind blew the cold water harshly against her body. Each drop plummeted at her willing her to stop but she could not. With all her strength she trudged on. In this dark night she could not see where she was going. How was she to find the doctor in this night? Why had she acted on impulse? She knew this was a failed journey but she kept going forward. Her eyes frantically searching the darkness for a light or a sign that she could read. Something that would indicate someone was there to help her. Her leg quickly struck something on the ground and she lost her balance.

Her body never hit the floor. It had hit something but it wasn't the dirt of the road. It felt soft like cloth and… She was too scared to move after she realized her body had fallen on top of another. Seeing how his chest was sturdy and flat she could only imagine it being a man. Should she look up at the man or just run off in a hurry? Her face felt a rush of heat as embarrassment took a hold. She had to see who it was. She just had to. Looking up she saw his violet hair cascade down like a smooth waterfall. It was hard to see in this darkness and the rain was not making it any better but there was something familiar about him. She could sense no evil or any good. However, it could be because she had fallen ill that her senses weren't working. Her hands touched his cold, pale arm. He was breathing but why was he so cold? She stopped and thought about the possibilities. Then it hit her. Despite not sensing a thing, she knew exactly who she had landed on.

"What are you doing here, you filth?" She almost screamed at the man. Her screamed echoed into the night and made the man wince in pain from how loud it was. He opened one amethyst eye and looked at her. His hand reached out weakly and grabbed her shoulders. There was blood. But monsters shouldn't have blood on them unless it was not of theirs. Her voice caught in her throat. She wanted to ask him so many questions but she could never voice them that night. He looked at her with a weak smile. There was nothing malevolent about it at all. It was almost…Warm. She was confused and begun to doubt if this was the right time to be doing this. She was in pain and so very weak but then again, so was he. It couldn't be that he had something in store for her, could it? Before she could dwell on it anymore he began to speak. The voice that left his mouth was nothing like the annoying taunting voice she had grown to hate. It was pure and deep like a song.

"Ma…Mother." With that he collapsed in her arms. His head nuzzled in her breast. At any other moment, Filia would have sent him flying by her own mace. She couldn't now. Not because of her weakness. No, she felt something was not right here. The man in her arms felt weak and by placing her hands on his side to remove him from her bosom, she felt a wound. He couldn't be the monster she had thought he was! She looked at her now blood stained hands. The rain tried tirelessly to clean them but she could see the blood slowly running off her hands. It was clear what this was. He needed help, regardless if she was in pain. He needed it now.

Adrenaline pumped through her veins. For these moments she felt no pain and thought only one thought "I have to save him". She placed him on her back and raced him towards her house. The healing he needed, no doctor in the outer world could treat this. They did not know how to use healing magic. The rain was furious at her and she still couldn't see a thing. She only hoped by turning around completely and going the opposite way she came would bring her back to her door. So, she carried him as quickly as she could back to her home. Kicking the door open, the pain surged through her body once more. She groaned and fell to her knees.

Drip. Drip. Opening her eyes she listened to the dripping of the rain that had collected on them drip to the floor. She could not continue. She had tried. Drip. She felt the warm rain drop on her hand. She stopped. Warm? Looking down she realized the drops were not just water. The reason why she got him this far had surfaced. She could not give up now. Not for anything in the world. Lifting herself up, she painfully trudged on. The stairs once again knew of her arrival and made sure she would be in agony after every step. She could not let them win and slowly brought him towards her room. She dropped him on her bed not so gracefully but he never stirred. After taking a few deep breaths, she figured what to do. Taking off his shirt, she knew she had to dress the wound but it was too dark in there. Even with the lamp light, she knew she had to be careful when dressing his wounds. She was too weak to heal him. She could only hope that dressing the wounds will buy him time so she could rest up some.

"Mother…I'll…Make sure it is done." The man mumbled in his sleep. Filia looked down at him kindly. He could only think of his mother at a time like this? He must be such a kind man. After cleaning and dressing his wounds, Filia sat down in the chair in the corner of her room. She watched him silently asking herself how she got into this situation. All she could do was watch over him. His chest rose and fell underneath the covers. That was enough to keep her from worrying. The pain had subsided and she had not realized how tired she was until she opened her eyes to find it being morning.

The sun had silently moved into the colorless room. She almost felt embarrassed by how plain the room looked. The sky was clear outside and a beautiful blue welcomed everyone. Everything was rather dull and ordinary in this room compared to the sky.

"Are you, the one that helped me?" The deep voice she had heard last night asked her in a soft tone. Looking up, she saw the slender man sitting up in the bed. His bandages were soaked by his own blood. He made no indication on his face that he could feel the pain. However, Filia knew it must be very painful. Maybe even more than the pain she felt at night. Now that she was well rested, she needed to cast a healing spell on him. She nodded slightly to his question and stood up awkwardly. She had to cast the spell as soon as possible. The man gave a small smile at her making her stop in her tracks. She didn't know this man at all but for some reason she knew that that smile was special. She felt hesitant of what she was about to do but he had no sign that he was going to pull away from her if she got nearer.

"I need to cast a resurrection spell on you." Filia said placing her hand on his shoulder to get him to lie down. His wounds were too severe for recovery. He complied with her demands without any argument. Looking at him this closely, she knew she was foolish to compare him with Xellos. Even if he had a small resemblance, the differences were very distinct. His body was that of a slender warrior. He must have been in a horrible battle to gain these wounds. She couldn't help but wonder what could have caused this. How could this man have gotten in this problem? "What happened to you if you don't mind me asking?"

"War." Filia's eyes widened at the thought. This town was so peaceful how could there be a war anywhere near here. She wanted to ask him where exactly was this war being fought and if there was anything she could do for him. He sighed, sensing her worry.

"Don't worry. This war has yet to happen in this time. I'm from a different place. I was too weak and apparently my enemy cast a spell that distorted space and time and I winded up in that road, which is where you called me filth." His tone was light and perhaps even humorous but Filia could only worry more.

"I'm so sorry!" She exclaimed greatly embarrassed. "It's just you look so much like someone I knew. Well now in the light you barely even look like him but-"

"It's alright, Miss Filia." He assured her. "I mistook you too remember." Filia blushed at the memory of his last words that night. If he remembered what he said could he possibly remember where his head landed? "My mother had golden hair too. So, I guess that makes us even." He was so calm and his face hinted no sadness, worry or happiness. He was just calm. However, his right eye was shut tight. Filia reached over hoping to soothe this new pain he had. Instead he opted to grab some of the cloth that dressed his wounds and put it over his eye.

"If you are experiencing pain there, I can cast a recovery spell unless…there is no eye there." Filia spoke the last part quietly. The man shook his head. He pushed away her hand gently and looked down.

"It hurts a little from the sun." He told her trying to reach the jacket and shirt Filia had discarded from his body. Noticing this Filia walked towards the chair where she laid them down at. She grabbed it for him and sat on the bed next to him. He did not hesitate to grab the clothing from her hands. Watching silently, she saw him rummage through the pockets to find some sun glasses and put them on. "I'm sorry." He whispered. "My eyes are a little sensitive." Filia made no sound trying to figure out the information he had told her. If his eyes were so sensitive why did he keep his left eye, the one closest to the window, open? She wanted to ask him but he wasn't even paying attention to her anymore. The man was more interested in the state of the room. It truly was an ordinary room. Only someone with a modest salary would ever live in here. Across from the bed was a little baby basket with Val resting in it. He stared at it for a while. He knew it was an ancient dragon . He knew a lot about those types of things. Filia became apprehensive. She didn't know why he would stare at Val like that. Did he even know what he was looking at? Sensing her worry again, the man decided to bring up conversation again. "Oh, how rude of me!" He exclaimed in a familiar tone. "I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Zanil. Zanil Me-…Metin"

"Metin?" Filia tried out saying the strange last name. Zanil did not feel human at all. There was something special about him but Filia didn't understand the sensation. His eyes were not at all human. At least the only one she saw wasn't. It was proof that he had to be some sort of monster. However, he did not seem to be evil. He could be playing tricks with her but she started to doubt that. He seemed genuine. "Mr. Metin, it is a good thing that you are alive. Especially after everything you went through." She smiled at him warmly, expecting for him to smile back but he just stared off from her.

"My mother…My brothers…What happened to them?" He mumbled softly in question. There was still no evidence of emotion on his face but Filia knew he was worried. Where did he exactly come from? How did he know her name? So, many questions that she needed answers to but she first needed some tea to calm her nerves. As she lifted her body, the pain in her abdomen came back. She groaned and touched her stomach. Why now at all times? Zanil touched her stomach and looked up. It was stiff under his touch. Her stomach had been feeling so stiff lately. There was another sensation though. As if his demeanor went straight into her soul, she felt calm. Her pain went away and for a brief second she felt a familiar presence with her.

"What is this?" He questioned softly. He dare not look into her eyes frightened to offend her. Filia for a moment forgot everything. Forgot about the pain and that night. What was she so unhappy for? Then the memories flooded back. She had hoped that Zanil could have chased the pain away forever. However, his touch was temporary.

"A painful curse." Filia told him seriously. He was not taken aback and he did not cease his amazement with her symptoms. He smiled once more looking up at her with a childlike gaze.

"No." He told her. "It is a gift."