"Bucky I really don't think you should go!" You say, trying to reach for him but he is already too far out the door.

"I have to do this." And just like that he's out the door and you are a crumpled mess on the floor of the kitchen.

That was three hours ago and you still hadn't moved. The cold tiles had numbed your legs long ago but you still believe he is coming back. He will walk through that door and all will be right in the world again.. except he hasn't so far.. and you doubt he will at this point.

It's midday and you are due at the doctors. Something about a routine checkup, you thought it was just so he could flirt with you again after taking those tests a few days ago because of how sick you had been feeling lately.

At least it's not a long walk, you think to yourself as you arrive at the large brick building. St Ives surgery it says on a small sign and you can't help the sense of dread that settles in your stomach as you take your seat in the waiting room.

Beth Doyle.

Here goes nothing.

Taking a seat on the weirdly comfortable chair you look over at the doctor. He's young, probably only a few years older than yourself with honey blonde hair and bright blue eyes. To be honest he is quite attractive. He had taken a liking to you lately and if you hadn't been with Bucky then maybe, just maybe you would have reacted more positively towards him but Bucky was always there.. in the back of your mind more so now that he's left.

"I have a few things I would like to discuss with you Miss Doyle."

"Beth.. please." You say, keeping your eyes focused on him and the piece of paper he is holding.

He nods. "Of course. Sorry. Well first things first.. you're pregnant."

Pregnant? He did not just say that! "I'm sorry.."

"Yes. About a month gone." He replies scanning the piece of paper with his eyes before smiling up at me. "I've also noticed you are quite pale. Now this may just be with feeling sick so maybe you are not eating as well as you normally would but I would like you to go to hospital and have a special medicine administered through a drip. It's a new technique."

"I-I can do that. I think."

"You should. It would be the best thing for the baby if it's mother is perfectly healthy too." He slowly makes his way towards the door before pausing for a second. "The father is still around right?"

"Oh yes. He got a good job in the army that means he can still stay at home. We will be just fine, thanks doctor." You say, putting on your best 'proud' voice before making your way home. It's a lie but at least it will stop people asking questions for a few weeks.

An hour later you sit in hospital hooked up to this drip the pretty doctor had been telling you about. It's an odd thing. Clear bag with a clear water-like substance inside. How can this little bag give you everything you need?

It doesn't take long before you can go home and once you get there you wish you could go back to the busy hospital room again. At least there you could people watch, listen in on conversations and not be sitting alone going over memories and memories of Bucky.

Three years earlier.

"You promised me dinner Barnes.. not a walk in the park." You whisper, passing a little old couple as Bucky takes your hand in his.

"I didn't necessarily say dinner."

He had said dinner. You remember it like it was yesterday.. because it was. You had met through Steve. Working in a library helped you connect with a wide range of people but Steve was your favourite customer. He loved to draw so would sketch a few things for you while sitting at one of the less busy tables but yesterday a tall, rather handsome man with piercing blue eyes had walked in, handed you a crumpled piece of paper and told you Steve was sick and wanted you to have his latest drawing. After his rude introduction to you you had decided to question him which then lead you to finding out his name is Bucky and that he would like to take you to dinner.

That is where you are now in life.

"If you say so. I believe you.. thousands wouldn't but I do Bucky."

"Good. Now enjoy the walk before I push you in the water." He whispers, his voice low and almost seductive.

Shaking your head you look up at him and really take him in. Piercing blue eyes, smooth almost tanned skin, tall and really handsome for someone that grew up in a poorer part of New York.

"You better make this up to me before I get bored of you Bucky and get some other man to actually take me to dinner."

That was three years ago. Your first date with Bucky. You can remember everything about your time together, all the things people would find pointless like how his feet were like ice some nights that you had to put a blanket between where your feet nearly touched in bed or how he would stand in the bath and practice his fighting moves on the slippery surface to become even better on all surfaces.. or so he said. You think it was because you caught him doing it once and that was the best excuse he could come up with. Each to their own though.

Bucky would never let you sit and wallow away like this. He would be the first person to get you out dancing to take your mind off whatever was worrying or upsetting you.

Two years earlier.

Your first anniversary as a couple. It was a strange day. It had started off like any other. Waking up, getting ready and going to work but then you had found out the boss had died overnight and the library was being threatened with closure if nobody took over the expenses. At the time you wished you could but you just didn't have that kind of money and although the boss hadn't been the nicest of men you missed him for the money he did have to continue with the library.

After hours working on your feet you had walked home, washed yourself and lay in bed almost crying yourself to sleep over possibly having to find a new job in an already jobless city.

Bucky was having none of it though. It was after all your first anniversary together and he wanted to cheer you up and celebrate so he took you dancing. After many drinks, a quick fumble in a dark alley and rushing home in the rain you had admitted that he had cheered you up. Even though your feet hurt for the next three days, you didn't regret going dancing. It's the 40's. That's what you did.

Now you sat alone wishing Bucky would come barging through that stupid white door and make you go out dancing.. instead you heard a light knocking on the door which only got louder the longer you left it.

Finally finding the energy to open the door you feel two strong men grab you, bundle you into a car and inject you with something.

That's the last memory you have.. until now.