SoccerCop: just after Sarah leaves Allison's house for the first time.
As her fingers gripped the stem of her glass like an old lover, Alison's vision grew blurry. A haze of grief slipped across her face as she looked at the door Sarah had just left from. It had hurt to have Beth just wander off, for her to just leave, but her heart was in two after hearing she was dead. Gone, forever, another spirit to add to her collection in the cupboard. Only this spirit wouldn't get her through her days, wouldn't keep her from sinking. No, that person was gone.
There was a gentle sound from behind her and then a warm hand sliding across her back. For a moment, a single moment where her eyes clenched shut and a tear rolled down her cheek, Alison thought it could be Beth. The same soft hand, that slight tough that gave her support and caring just in the brush of fingertips.
"Are you going to be okay?" Cosima had been friends with Beth but nothing like Alison, that bond was something she'd always marveled at. Now the bond was severed.
A shuddered breath shook Alison's entire body. "I don't know that I can honestly answer that question right now." The sun was gone from view, a cold seeping through her bones. Beth had been her guiding star, her warmth, the thing her entire being was drawn to. The secrecy was hard and hiding Beth was the worst thing imaginable, especially when they both had people waiting for them at home, but that never mattered when they were together. Not even Cosima knew the depth of their affections but had watched them together enough that Alison knew she'd figure it out.
"Do you want me to stay?" She'd planned on going back to her hotel but Cosima didn't feel right leaving Alison like this, not when she was eyeing the door like Beth was going to stumble through it any second with a big gotcha didn't I grin on her face.
Alison slowly shook her head, body shuddering when the warmth next to her shifted away. As much as she loved Cosima, she just wasn't Beth. "No, no, go ahead and go. I'm just going to tidy up a bit and then go to bed." Plastering what she hoped was a brave smile on her lips, Alison glanced up at her clone, heart thudding at the look being given back. Still, Cosima only hesitated a moment before nodding shortly.
"Call me if you need anything, okay? Seriously, Alison, don't just like sit here and cry to yourself." Sighing to herself, Cosima gathered her coat and slipped out the door when she only received a silent nod in return.
It took Alison ten minutes to realize that Cosima had left through the door she was still staring out. The realization only came when she finally let out a deep sob, her hand gripping so hard at the wine glass that she thought it would shatter too, and got no response to her whispered words.
"I never got to tell her how much I really love her."