AN: Watcher 219 gave me this idea to do little oneshots focusing on ShuuxRuri. So I'm doing them! They'll be VERY short, fluffy, and follow no plot. Primary focus is ShuuRi, but I'll also sneak in my second Nisekoi OTP: OnodeRaku.

Episode 1! Lunchtime with Ruri! Enjoy, reader! :)

/

"Ruri-chan, what do you think of Shuu?" Onodera asked, poking me in the shoulder and giving me a wicked grin with a innuendo in her eyes. I could tell right away, these glasses of mine are always great for that kind of thing. Or it was just blatantly obvious; it didn't matter. There was obviously something she was implying, and, logically thinking, something funny to her.

My reply was quick, concise, and struck him where his weaknesses shone brightest. "He's an idiot, a perv, and quite frankly, annoying."

I heard a crash and Ichijou's voice ring out. "Shuu! Shuu! Are you OK?"

So he was listening to me. Serves him right for hearing what I really thought. I smiled as I heard a groan and grunt from Raku, then fake-crying, since Shuu was the ever-present drama king/queen he was. Suddenly, I stopped, knowing that this specific plethora of sounds could easily be interpreted for something dirtier. I cleared my throat mentally, shaking my head at myself for thinking like Shuu. I pushed my glasses up on my nose and looked at Onodera, who was worried about the noise that just rang out. I turned an eye towards her, reading her thoughts, and muttered, "It's fine, 'Saki. They're just being the idiots that they are." Well, not counting Raku- mostly. He was completely oblivious to Kosaki's feelings, which I wanted to pummel the living s*** out of him for. What? It's a K+ fic that author's writing. I can't very much swear now, can I?

"Ruri-chan, do you think Ichijou-kun's okay? It sounded pretty bad," she muttered, holding her hands in front of her, clearly worried. "One of them could be hurt."

"Then Ichijou-kun will learn his lesson for hanging around that monkey." I turned back to my lunch, silently eating my chicken hungrily. I felt someone watching me. When I looked up, Kosaki had that grin on her face again, and asked me the same question once again.

"So, Ruri-chan. Are you a tsundere for Maiko-kun? Hmmmmm?" she asked, poking my shoulder.

"No. At least I'm not silently crazy for him, like you are with-" I started rebuking her for her words, but she stopped me.

"N-no! Don't bring him up!" she flusteredly responded, waving her hands in front of her like a madman. Calming down, she prodded me once again. "mmmm?"

Innuendo.

"I have no feelings whatsoever for the buffoon, Kosaki."

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that!" A cheerful voice said from behind me. I whipped around and began to choke on my chicken. As my throat made hacking and choking noises, I caught a glimpse of Kirisaki as my struggle for air continued, the piece of meat stuck in my throat and quickly enflaming it. The hotness of the meat strung my throat, since I wasn't used to raw stuff being placed there.

Uh-oh. There were way too many innuendos in that last paragraph. I'm sorry. I'd revamp it, but you'd be bored by then. I'll just keep moving on. Ahem…

Anyway, my vision began to fade as Kirisaki began to panic, apologizing while freaking out. If I wasn't fighting a losing battle for air, I'd have laughed quite hard. As a last resort as my vision faded even more, she was leading Shuu by the shirtsleeve while blubbering statements like "You gotta save her!" or, "she'll die if you don't help?"

The buffoon I'd mentioned earlier just shrugged and placed his hands on my chest. In my final moments of life, would I really be groped by this… thing that I couldn't stand? … mostly.

With a firm, quick push, the piece of CHICKEN (let me accentuate that to eliminate any further innuendos) flew out of my mouth and landed neatly in the bin where my mother packaged it for my lunch this morning.

I coughed and sputtered, then found my voice and a tiny, tiny smile. "Thanks, Maiko-kun."

"No problem, glasses-buddy!" Shuu said happily, forgetting all my previous insults while bounding away, incoherently sputtering nonsense to Raku about the size of that new, hot junior's chest.

Chitoge stuck around and poked me in the ribs after being sure I could breathe. "I think you like him. Heheheh."

I sighed. Is this really what the oneshots would be full of? Really? Fine. Fine. You know what, I don't even care anymore. Have it your way. Erm, copyright Burger King.

/

AN: I hope you liked it. There'll be at least one of these every week. Expect a max of 7, one per day. That's doubtful, though. So, I hope you enjoyed it. Leave a review, PLEASE! I love seeing your thoughts and feedback, so leave one, please! It encourages me to no end, seeing your responses. :) It also makes me happy! So make me happy. :3 Also, it lets me know that you guys want to see more of my randomized thoughts being put into word-ular forme. :D

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Next time: Crowded bus on the way to the beach! Unintentional!

The Slain Executioner, slashing out. :)