Neville-Oc one-shot! It's long, as I've tended to begin to do with my oneshots. I just got this idea and was like OMiGees I've got to write it out! Hopefully you'll like my pairing. Also, jumping arund the years is present. I like timeskips. Don't like find another story. Obviously I like Neville, book and movie version (Boy did he get hot!) and the thought of him being different than everyone expects him to be just spurred it. So WARNING! OOC!Neville, Sexual situations, Cursing/Foul Language. Rated M, cause I have Paranoia to the sky. If any of that is too much, back away now. If not enjoy the story!
Disclaimer: Me no own! JKR does, and she's amazing, so there.
And So It Began, With A Bang And A Hiss.
Year One
"You'll soon find out that some wizrding families are better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort," said the blond boy, looking over his shoulder at the dark haired girl who stood behind him. She smiled and raised a brow. "We can help you there." Everyone watched as Draco Malfoy held out his hand to the Boy-Who-Lived. Everyone but the girl. Her eyes were focused on the redheaded boy who stood shaking beside the famous Harry Potter.
"I think I can tell the wrong sort for myself, thanks," Harry replied, scowling at Draco Malfoy's hand. Both of the students in front of him sneered, and the girl opened her mouth to speak when a voice behind her rose up.
"There is also a strict no fighting policy here a Hogwarts," the Deputy Headmistress said tightly. Draco and the girl felt their lips curl before both splitting and knocking into Potter and his Weasley friend.
"Move," the girl hissed at a pudgy, brown haired boy who held a frog tight in his grasp. He scurried back, making room for the girl as she crossed her arms and stood beside Malfoy. No one had heard her name yet, no one had mentioned it at all. But she stayed next to Malfoy, close to his side, eyes darting about the Great Hall, not in wonder but in skeptism. She scoffed and leaned over whispering in Draco's ear, "So this is what all the hype is about? This happens every Christmas at the Manor."
"Yes, well father did say that it wasn't anything amazingly special," Draco whispered back with a smirk. The two continued their disapproving whispers until a name was called that made the entire hall become quiet.
"Lestrange, Lucrezia!" McGonagall called. The dark haired girl looked at Malfoy and grinned, walking up to the stool. She sat down, looking over the four tables with a haughty smirk. The hat had barely rested a second on her head before it shouted its answer.
"SLYTHERIN!"
The table on the far side of the Hall erupted in cheers and foot stomps and Lucrezia raised her brow once before stepping down the stairs again. Many of the students moved out of her way, sending glares at her. She seemed to relish them. Stopping momentarily by Draco, she grinned.
"Save you a seat," she said, her eyes landing on the boy who had scurried out of her way earlier. He was staring at her strangly, almost scared. She just lifted her head higher and made her way towards the Slytherin table.
Lucrezia watched as her cousin rose into the air with Longbottom's rememberall in hand. "Did you see is face?" he called out to the other Slytherins. The dark haired girl smirked.
"Maybe if the fat lump had given that a squeeze, he'd have remembered to fall on his fat ass!" she called back up to him, with laughter trailing behind her. And then the famous Scarhead decided to join Draco in the air. She watched as the boys bickered and then Potter flew off to catch the stupid object and Draco joined her again laughing.
"Bloody idiot, that one. It's just a Rememberall. They don't even work," Lucrezia said, crossing her arms.
"Shut it, Lestrange!" Weasley called from the other side of the lined students. The cousins looked at the redheaded boy with matching glares.
"What did you say?" she asked, hand moving for her wand. Draco stopped her however as McGonagall showed just as Harry landed. They both grinned at the prospect of the boy getting in trouble.
They Come Crawling With Mutal Hate.
Second Year
She was on her way through Diagon Alley, close behind her uncle when the boy came into sight. The boy she learned about that summer. He was following an older woman who looked far to dressed up for a trip to Diagon Alley. Grinning, she stuck her leg out innocently as he skuttled by. He tripped, dropping the packages he had in hand all over the space in front of him. She watched as he almost got ran over by all the busy people.
"Hey Longbottom," she siad quietly, bending a bit. "How's mummy and daddy?" The boy turned red and picked up all his belongings, glaring at her retreating form.
She caught up to her Uncle just inside the book store, making her way to stand next to her cousin as Uncle Lucius began indentifying the children that stood beside them. Giggleing behind her hand as the blond man threw insult after insult at the Weasley's father, she caught sight of Longbottom outside again. She smirked, but upon seeing her, he pulled the older woman in the opposite direction.
"Aww, Longbottom's taking away my fun," she whispered to Draco and gestured outside. He chuckled quietly only to stop as his father shot him a look.
"See you at work, Weasley," Uncle Lucius said, turning with a glare and leaving the shop. Lucrezia and Draco followed, only stopping to glare at Potter.
"See you at school," Draco hissed. Lucrezia just smirked. She held no grudge against the 'Golden Trio'. She'd rather spend her time making Longbottom's life a living hell. Like mother like daughter.
Herbology was a stupid subject. Or at least that's what Lucrezia thought. They should sack that and bring in real classes. Like Dark Arts, instead of just the defence against it. Fluffing down her earmuffs, the Slytherin girl stood inbetween Crabbe and Parkinson, directly across from Neville. She simply stared at him as he listened to Sprout. His eyes flipped back and forth between her and the professor, however, and she allowed herself a smirk. And then she allowed a loud laugh just as he fell to the ground, faint.
Why couldn't the damn monster attack Purebloods. Lucrezia would have loved to see his fat arse petrified within the brink of death. Neville shared the Slytherin's thoughts. Just put an end to her, leave her bloody and dead in the corridor. At least he wouldn't have to deal with her. At least she wouldn't have to deal with him. If anything the two could agree on one thing.
Their hatred kept them from killing each other.
"Your useless," she hissed at him, wand pointed in his face. Neville was kneeling on the ground, tears pulling from his eyes as he tried to untangle himself. "A disgrace to all Pureblood wizards everywhere. What would dear old daddy say? That is if he had his mind and wasn't locked away in a padded cell. Just like mummy. Sad really. They didn't care about you, so they let themselves be attacked."
"Take that back! You don't know them at all! They can think!" he yelled back, reaching for his wand.
"Expelliarmus!" she yelled, and with a flick of her wand. The magical wood flew off a few feet and she smirked leaning over him. "Is it true they thought you were a squib? Maybe you are, your rotten at everything else. Don't worry, they should have a job for you once Filch dies."
She pat his head and walked away, giggling to herself.
Attraction Growing.
Third Year
Neville was really getting tired of the black haired Slytherin. It seemed everywhere he went, she and Malfoy were there, ready to do whatever they could to belittle him. He found solstice in the greenhouses, surrounded by the plants that filled them. But yet, that bloody girl seemed to find him there too.
"Oh, lookie here. It's Nevvie Longbottom," came her teasing voice. It had that high quality that was somehow appealing only because it was just so unappealing to hear. Looking up from the Devil's Snare he was pruning, he threw a glare at her, not amusing her little game with words. She gasped and place a hand over her heart. "Nevvie glares. Who would of known."
"Just leave me alone, Lestrange," he said, spitting the name like it was an illness. "Your not worth my time."
"Not worth your time?" she asked, twirling her wand as she stepped closer to him. Continually, she stopped it as it pointed at him and he could feel fear start to pound in his chest. "But Nevvie, I thought I was the only person who actually talked to you. You don't enjoy our games?"
She was close to him now, so close that he realized that her grey eyes were actually quite different from her cousin's. His were cold steel, where as her's burned as if the metal was being melted down. He also noticed that they were wide, taking up a large portion of her face. He could smell her fragrent floral scent. It always proceeded her, but he had never been so close to it. He glanced down, only to have his eyes dart back to a safer location. She smirked. Gulping, he backed away, not likeing the proxmitity between them.
"No. I-I don't," he answered, reaching out for his wand, though what he would do with it, he had no idea. She moved with cat like grace, trailing her fingers in the dirt that lined the table.
"If I were you, I'd watch myself. Out here all alone in the greenhouses where Sirius Black could show up at any moment. Just think about it. He could just pop up behind you."
"ARGH!"
Neville jumped at the roar behind him and screamed shrilly. Lucrezia laughed out loud, holding her side as Goyle wiggled his fingers tauntingly at the frightened Gryffindor. He stared between the two of them, swallowing back the tears that threatened to spill over. His eyes took on a feirce edge and he stood with his wand tigtly clutched, pointing it at the girl.
"Your insane, just like your mum!" he yelled, lip trembling.
Abruptly Lucrezia stopped laughing, and looked up at the boy a sneer taking over her aristocratic features. Just like that, those burning eyes cooled like lava once exposed to air. She raised her wand directly under his chin and glared at him. And somehow he still noticed how her chest heaved with every shuddering intake of air.
"What did you say, Longbottom?" she all but growled. Neville looked down at her and sucked in a breath not answering. "Answer me!" The demand came out a shrill yell. When he still refused to repeat himself, a saccharine smile took over her features. "You know, people say I'm alot like my mum. One day, we'll see how you stand up to the curse. Do you think you'll last as long as your preacious mummy did? I don't think you will."
"Luce, that's enough. Come on," Goyle whispered, grabbing her arm and gently pulling her out of the greenhouse. But she threw one more scathing look at the Gryffindor before she was pulled out completely.
Neville was sure that his bogart would be different now. So woud those budding dreams he had been having.
Among Principle, You Want It.
Fourth Year
While everyone cringed at the curse Moody put on the spider, the man saw a malicious grin he had seen before. Though not for a while. Even her cousin shied away from it, but Lucrezia Lestrange sat up straighter in her seat, watching the bug suffer on the desk in front of Longbottom. Her dark eyes switched between the boy and the bug quickly, liking the torment she saw in both of them.
"Stop it! Can't you see it's bothering him!" yelled another student. Immedietly, he cut off the spell and looked surprised at the boy. His face was twisted in pain. Lestrange's face was still bright with the wonder of it all.
"Did you like seeing what happen to your mum?" came her soft voice. Neville ignored her, staring out the window blankly. She and Draco walked past, but she paused in front of him blocking his view of the world. When she saw his face, her own fell a bit. And then the haughty smile was back. She leaned in and whispered, "I did." Then with one humorless chuckle she turned.
"Leave him alone, Lestrange," came a colder voice. The girl mearly looked over her shoulder, smirking at Granger.
"Already over, Mudblood. Merlin, try to save the day and you can't even get there on time."
He was crazy.
That was all there was too it. Why else would he be toying with the idea of gathering his Gryffindor courge, heading over to the Slytherin table, and asking the girl who made his school year hell to the Yule Ball. He looked over at her as she covered her mouth with her hand, laughing at something Pansy had said. Merlin, she was beautiful. Everything about her was beautiful, even the slightly manic glint in her eyes when she played her word games with him.
It had to be that brief moment. For just a second, there was concern on her face when she spoke to him, a tinge of guilt leaking into her words. No one else had caught it, but after hearing her snarkiness for four years, Neville clearly picked out the slip. She cared about him. Even if it was just the tiniest little bit. She worried about what her words did to him.
But still, he had to be crazy right? Did he really, truely fancy Lucrezia Lestrange?
"Go to the ball with me," Blaise said for the seventh time that night. Lucrezia looked up from her plate and raised a brow at him.
"How long is this going to go on?" she asked, glaring at the darker boy. She should have been flattered, she supposed. He was by far the handsomest Slytherin in the school, besides Draco. Very rare was it for him to show intrest in someone other than himself as vain as he was. It'd been whispered that the only person he would ever date would be ten times more beautiful than himself.
So she should have been flattered.
Instead she was annoyed.
He grinned and lent back against the table, propping his elbows up. "Until you say yes. Or get a date. But really, who's going to be better than me? We'd make a great looking couple, and you know it, Lestrange."
Lucrezia stared at the boy, eyes narrowed. "Are you asking me because you want to, or because you have no one else to take?"
"There's a little of both. You interest me, and your the only girl in the entire school who could match me hand for hand in anything," he replied, leaning in close to her. His mouth was a breath away from hers, and she stared into his hazel eyes until he grinned and backed away.
"Fine, I'll go with you. We'll cordinate and look better than my cousin and that pug-faced girl," she said, letting her eyes wonder to the pair. She had the strangest, burning sensation in her stomach however and looked over to see Neville Longbottom staring at her, his eyes wide and a frown on his face. Smirking she spoke to her date again. "Yes, we'll be the best pair there."
Blaise looked across the hall, catching Neville's gaze before he looked away frightened. He moved closer to the girl who had just accepted his invitation for the Ball. "I truely worry about your obsession with that blood traitor," he whispered, turning her face towards his again.
"And I about your vanity, but I keep it to myself," she hissed back, standing quickly and leaving the hall. The black boy watched her go with a delighted smirk.
He was breathing easily, trying to keep down his nervousness as he walked Ginny Weasley down the stairwell towards the Ball. He glanced over at the redhead girl, dressed in gauzy green and pink, and blushing all the way to her ears.
"Ginny, I did tell you you looked pretty, r-right?" he asked, feeling his own cheeks flame up as they reached the ground floor. She smiled at him and he felt himself reply with one of his own.
"You look nice as well, Neville. Thank you for asking me to come with you," she said quietly, looking away. Neville didn't hear. He was looking towards the dungeons. Luckily, Ginny didn't notice as she was looking around at everyone else.
Neville swallowed around the lump in his throat as she came up, Blaise Zabini's hand on the small of her back. She wore a period type dress, light pink ruffles layered under a deeper blush pink with golden piping. Her shoulders showed deliciously, collarbones accented with the matching choker. Her hair was pulled back from her face, but the black curls hung free down her back. Zabini matched her in his standard white wizard robes, the blush pink bowtie and cumberband popping against the white button up.
The pair turned waiting for her cousin to catch up with a cinging Pansy Parkinson. It was obvious who was the better looking out of the four, the cousins with their sharp features setting the bar high. Draco said something to her and she lent her head to the side, standard Slytherin smirk in place.
"Neville? Neville? We can go in now," Ginny said, pulling on his sleeve. He looked away from the girl who haunted his dreams and to the girl that was on his arm. Smiling, he nodded and headed for the door, somehow getting there at the exact time she did. Both couples stopped, staring at the other. Neville cleared his throat and glanced her over again.
"See something you like, Nevvie?" she said, her smirk gone. Instead there was a blank face as she looked over to Ginny. Her eyes scanned over the dress and she smirked. "Another homemade rag, Weaslett?"
Behind her, Draco and Pansy snorted. Still Lucrezia's face stayed blank. Her dark eyes flashed back to Neville and she stared at him for a long moment, her brow quirked. Then she glanced at Zabini nodding once. He smirked, glanced at the Gryffindors, and then led her into the Ball.
"Ask him for a dance, and I'll leave you alone for the rest of the year," Blaise said, swirling his drink in his glass. "If he accepts it. If not, you spend the night dancing with me."
Lucrezia cut her eyes away from the dancing couple on the floor, looking over at her date. He was leaned over at the waiste, whispering in her ear. She hadn't accepted a dance from hm or anyone else all night, instead sulking over the fact that she couldn't ruin Longbottom's apparent fun.
"Come on, Lestrange. A bet is always good fun."
"What makes you think I want to dance with anyone? And who the hell are you talking about anyways?"
"You know exactly who I'm talking about," he hissed, plopping down in the seat next to her. He grabbed her chin, almost roughly and turned her face to his own. "You've accepted to come with me, and yet you stare at him all night. Longbottom." He spit the word, sneering at the Gryffindor.
"Why would I want to dance with the blood traitor?"
"Do not deny it, Lestrange. Just do it, make my night somehow worth it." He let go of her chin and sat back in his chair, sipping at his drink.
Lucrezia stood with an easy grace as the song ended, and with a glare back at her housemate, she walked straightbacked to the Gryffindor as his date went to speak to friends. She sneered at the girl, befre turning back to Longbottom. He saw her, was watching her with squinted eyes. She raised her head, squaring her shoulders, and made the last few steps.
"Longbottom," she greeted, with a nod.
"Lestrange?" he replied, the name more of a question than a greeting.
"Would you fancy a dance?" the girl asked, looking away from him.
Neville stared at her, watching her face light up with a blush. She looked nervous, and he couldn't understand why. If anything it should have been him who had the blush. Who should have asked, he was the Gryffindor. Clenching his jaw, he looked over to Ginny who looked over with a smile that fell when she noticed his company. She raised her brows, but he shook his head in response. Looking back to the Slytherin he steeled himself, already regretting his answer.
"No. I don't."
Her head snapped up and she glared at him. Her flushed cheeks now took over her face, making her even more beautiful.
"Why because of your Weaslett girlfriend?" she almost screeched. The surrounding dancers looked at the two of them, and she duced her head, straightening her dress. Her jaw was clenched tightly, her fist shook, and Neville thought she had never looked more beautiful. He shook his head, concerned about his well being, but with a deep breath, he replied with a careless shrug.
"Ginny has nothing to do with it. I just don't want to dance with you. Have a good night, Lestrange."
She watched as he walked away from her, going back to the reheaded nit and offering his hand for another dance. Lucrezia watched, wide-eyed before pursing her lips and storming back to Blaise who had been watching the scene with amused glee.
"Aw, no dance with the baffoon?" he asked. She silenced him wth a look before grabbing his hand and dragging him to the middle of the floor.
"You had better dance, well. I have a reputation to uphold and I refused to be upstaged."
"But of course, love," he replied with a smile, taking her into his arms.
Neville knew he would regret it. He just knew it. But it's not like he could go back in time or anything to fix it. Swallowing, he tried to look away, but his gaze continually went back to the pair. They had stayed in the just as long as Ginny and he had, but they had obviously stole the attention of anyone wanting to watch the dancing couples.
They were perfect together, sweeping across the floor gracefuly, people moving out of their way. Practiced, after many years of Pureblood Balls and parties, but still relaxed. Zabini held her tenderly, as if he held the world in his arms, and lead the dance with a confident ease. Lestrange followed him, her eyes adoring, smile on her face, and submissive her dainty steps. They floated.
And at the end of the night, they kissed. They were still kissing. And Neville couldn't look away. He bit his tongue and glanced away again, only to have his brown eyes raise again. This time however, Zabini was standing by the doors, staring at him, as Draco led his date and cousin out. The Slytherin boy narrowed his gaze before smirking and walking away.
"Ah, Miss Lestrange. As beautiful as your mother, I wonder if you are as loyal," came the smooth voice of her mother's idol. She stood in the parlor of her home, Draco to one side of her, Clover to the other. She kept her face tilted down, eyes on the ground, until the man raised her head. "Do you believe you are loyal, Lucrezia?"
She let her dark eyes meet his red ones and blinked, swallowing as she felt the pressure against her head that signified his leginimens. He nodded his head, with a smile. "Not quite there, but you are on your way, young one. You are loyal, and that is obviously a trait from your mother. You will do well in my ranks, I believe."
Lucrezia averted her gaze as a shiver ran down her spine. His ranks. Something inside of her broke.
The Fissure Expands, The Crack Breaks.
Fifth Year
He stared a the paper, unbelieveing. She was out? That crazy woman was free? His jaw clenched tightly as he stood and headed for the doors. He stopped just as Zabini walked in, his hand once again on the small of Lestrange's back. The girl looked worse for the ware, still collected and cuttingly beautiful, but not up to her usual standard. She looked up at him, and swallowed, almost if not seeing him. Gray eyes flicked down to the paper he held in his hand.
"You've seen then?" she asked, a spark of something lightng up in her eyes. "Wonderful right? Maybe we'll get to see how long you last now. I bet a third as long as your mummy did." She smirked, before letting herself be led away.
Neville stood still, his shoulders tense and his jaw and fists clenched. He should be scared, but all he felt was anger. Anger at Bellatrix Lestrange for taking away his parents. Anger at his parents for being Aurors during such a dangerous time. Anger at Harry Potter for not finishing the job. Anger at himself for being scared all the time. And lastly, anger at Lucrezia Lestrange for barely putting any snark in the comment she just made. She sounded like she almost pitied him, like she knew what he was going through.
Silently, he stalked out of the hall, heading to the one place he knew he could get his anger out.
Lucrezia sat in the toad's class silently, really just copying the book word for word, not taking notes at all. The woman walked over to her table and smiled at Draco before touching her shouder lightly. They Slytherin looked up at the sickly sweet smile and nodded her head giving a small one back before she went back to copying her book.
Umbridge watched the girl with slanted eyes. She had been practically the only Slytherin who hadn't jumped at the chance to be on the Inquisitorial Squad, even though she held her own Prefect badge, she didn't want more power it seemed. Which all in and around it's self was strange for a Slytherin of her upbringing. But she would let the girl be, for now.
She was all bite without the sting. Even now as they stood in front of each other, all she said was things he had already heard her say. Nothing new, and nothing that really hurt anymore. He watched her, eyes going over her body. It seemed like she had lost weight over the holidays instead of the usual slight gain she always had. Taking a step forward, he was surprised to hear her constant flow of insults stop. He was surprised that she actually took a step back as well.
He continued his steps until she was backed into a corner. She looked around, hoping to see someone, anyone who would help her but Neville chuckled.
"None of your little Snake friends are going to come this high. But you just had to come rub it in my face, hmm? That you have a mummy again now. Does anyone else know that she's been writing you? Have you written her back?" he asked her, fully inteding on four years of payback.
Lucrezia's eyes widened and she shook her head, quickly. "She doesn't write me," she whispered, having it almost covered by Neville's laugh.
"I saw the letter when you went to hand in your potion, yesterday. You should keep better watch over your things. So, does insane mummy treat you like you always thought? You always seem to act like we're so different, but you grew up without your parents too, didn't you? At least mine were remebered for something good," he spat, watching her trembling form with glee. Was this what she had felt all those years. It actually felt good. Really good.
"All your mum does is stare out a window and drool. Mine is still capable of the Dark Lord's noble work," she hissed.
"So is the insanity from that noble work, or from all the inbreeding that flows through her veins?"
Her hand raised quickly, poised to slap him, but he caught it, eyes bruning as he stared down at her. Those wide eyes were lit up in anger again, and before he knew what he was doing, Neville lent down, pressing his lips to hers roughly. For a moment, she didn't move. She stayed absoluty still, staring at the Gryffndor in shock. But as she felt a swipe across the inseam of her lips she broke. Her eyes closed and he kissed him back, sighing as he intertwined their fingers together. She melted into him and Neville smiled leaning back.
He looked to her eyes, noticing the dark edge around them and taking pride that he had done that to the girl. SHe was gasping for breath, looking back at him. He almost thought that she was going to attempt to hit him again, but her next words surprised him.
"Why'd you stop, Nevvie?" She craned her neck, brushing their lips together. He smirked and pressed her back into the corner, kissing her lips again with refound vigor. She moaned softly, and he grinned to himself.
New memory for that Patronus charm.
Neville kissed his way down her neck, grinning at the whimpers he pulled from her mouth with the movement. "My grandmother would kill me if she saw me at the moment." Truth be teling, he only had a couple of minutes before she would begin to wonder where he had gotten off to. The day before Easter was always shopping day, and he had barely gotten away to find Lucy in the alley beside Eyelops.
"And you think my mother wouldn't try the Cruciatus curse on me?" Lucrezia asked, noticing the slight flinch at the mention of her mother and her favorite curse. "Still having nightmares about dear old mum, then Longbottom?"
"You act as if you don't have nightmares about your demented mum, Lestrange," he shot back, pulling away to look the girl in her wide grey eyes. She grinned and grabbed his jacket pulling him back. He went easily, returning his attack to her full lips. He was confident with his movements, one hand clutching her hip while the other gripped it's self in her wild hair.
"Why don't you act like this more often, Longbottom?" she asked, tilting her head back against the wall as he moved to her jaw and ignoring the growl at the formality.
He pulled back again and she wasted no time in moving in on her own attack of his neck. Groaning, he chuckled out an answer.
"So quick to let other girls jump me, Lucy?" A dark moan came from his mouth as she nipped rather harshly.
"What girls, Neville? Do I really have to begin hexing anyone who looks at you?" Her usually girlish voice was low and rough, desire and anger leaking through her words.
He pulled her away with the hand that was still wrapped around tendrils of her hair and grinned. "Jealous are we? If only I were so good at hexing, all those bloody gits who fawn over you. Zabini for example..." he trailed off, placing kisses on her strong jaw. She closed her eyes, lips pulling up into a smeared crimson smile.
Lightly she rubbed her cheek along his own, like the cat he loved comparing her too, feeling the stubble he had recently require due to his lack of shaving. She loved the feel of it against her soft cheek. Who would have known after seeing her with pretty boy Blaise.
"Your good with Herbogy, yeah?" she whispered in his ear, biting the lobe softly before she giggled and added a little manically, "Poison."
"Merlin, your insane," he groaned before roughly kissing her. He could feel her lips pull up in a smile under his own. He coud practically hear the thought going through her head. 'You love it.' And really, he couldn't deny that he did.
He was back, and the whole world knew now.
Neville sat next to Ginny who was staring at the plate in front of her forlorn. They all looked completely horrible, Neville in particular. His face was still a little swollen, even after the healing potions and spells. He picked up his fork, but didn't eat anything on the plate. None of them had seen Harry since the incedent. Glancing to the Slytherin table, he saw Lucy look away quickly.
She hadn't spoken to him since he got caught by the Inquisitorial squad. He let out a deep breath and looked back own at his plate. Maybe it was for the best.
A hand reached out and grabbed her, pulling Lucrezia into an empty compartment. The door shut and locked before she had time to get out. Turning with fist raised, she stopped short of Neville's face, staring at him with wide eyes. The grey eyes he came to love searched his face, fist uncurling an cradling his jaw. He leaned down, touching his forehead to her own.
"It's all going to be different, now," she whispered, closing her eyes.
"It doesn't have to be," he said just as quietly.
"Yes it does," she replied, a tear slipping from her left eye. "We're on different sides of this battle, Neville."
"Then get on the right side. Merlin, for once Luce. Do the right thing."
"Neville..."
"No." Leaning in, he kissed her. Differenty from all the other times. Usually it was rough, or quick, passionate and full of lust. But this one, it melted her, made her knees weak for a completly different reason. The kiss was sweet, slow, and loving. He cradled her face as if he would break her. Tears fell freely now and he backed away. "Please, Lucy. I can protect you."
"My family, Neville. I can't betray them. I'm sorry," she whispered before backing away from him. She opened the door and slipped out of the compartment, wipeing at the errent tears that fell from her eyes.
Love Is A Mirror Of One Soul Projected As Two.
Sixth Year
Her forearm itched under the black wool blazer she wore. Lucrezia sighed, running a hand through her curls as they landed at the platform. Almost immedietly, pictures were being taken of the four of them. It was big news that the Malfoy's, and in association Colver and herself, were knee deep on the wrong side of good and evil. But much like she had told Neville, that is a matter of opinion. Whereever her family stood was where she stood, even if she had been on the wrong side of one to many crucios this past summer. She kept her head down, only raising it to allow her aunt to kiss her on the cheek.
She and her cousins quickly found the Slytherin compartment, Draco plopping down in his seat next to Parkinson, Clover and Lucrezia on either side of Zabini. The dark boy put his arm about Lucrezia's shoulders, kissing her temple lightly.
"Their voultures," he whispered and she nodded her head, mutely.
In all truth she longed for the lanky nonmuscular arms of a Gryffindor. She wanted the whispered words to lack the knowing tone, she wanted the kiss to be firey and sweet all at the same time. Sighing, she relaxed into what she did have and stared out the window, watching as the station disappeared and the ladscape that would take up the window, unchanging, pass by slowly. This had to be the longest train ride in all of her six years.
Neville sat awkwardly int he small compartment, picking on the food that was set before him. He felt out of place, especially since Slughorn stopped asking him questions and Zabini sat in the corner, staring at him as if he were something he would wipe off the bttom of his shoe. Ginny pat his knee lightly, giving him a reassuring smile.
Turning his head towards the window, he sighed wondering what it was that Lucy was doing. He smiled at the though of her. He had seen her before boarding the train, and he couldn't help but want to grab her, to hold her close. She had had a rough summer, he was sure. Not only was her uncle in jail for the time being, her home had been searched, her loyalties were surely being tested, and she was probably seeing more of her mother than she had ever hoped too.
He rememered a discussion they had had about their parents once. He had been shocked at what she had said.
'Everyone thinks I repect my mum, that I idolize her. But it's just a front. To tell the truth, I can't stand her. No offense to your parents or anything, but it's not because of what she did to them. It's the audacity that she had to actually get caught doing it. She left me alone in the care of her sister. Aunt Narcissa is okay, but the house is so cold and quiet. I can't stand my uncle, but he's more of a father than my own had been, seeing as he got himself caught too. They were sloppy and careless, and they left me alone.'
He had been mad for awhile, but after thinking about it with the way she was raised, it only made sense that that was what she thought on the subject.
"And what about you Mr. Longbottom, good at any particuar subject?" Slughorn asked, much to the amusment of eeryone in the compartment, save Ginny and Harry.
"Uh.. Herbology, sir. I'm fairly well in there. My best subject."
Slughorn nodded, but turned back to Harry and Neville felt even more relieved that he was being ignored, rather than studied.
Lucrezia studied her cousin. He looked as upset as she should have been looking, but really it was his father's own fault. If the man hadn't been so obsessed with being the best of the Dark Lord's followers, or at least could back up the arrogance he exuded, he wouldn't have gotten himself caught. Her mum hadn't gotten cught this time, both luckily and unluckily for her. Luckily, she hadn't been forced by Voldemort to get the mark, unluckily becuase her mother had crucioed her, much to Aunt Cissy's dismay, until she did. Narcissa had raised the young woman to be like her. A wife to a Death Eater, there to listen, understand, and relax them. She didn't raise the girl to risk her life and family by following the path of her mother. But Bellatrix would have none of it.
So that was how Lucrezia found herself in the sixth floor bathrooms, past curfew, washng at her Darkmark, trying to get the thing to stop stinging and itching every few moments. She knew it wouldn't help anything, te sensation coming from the Dark Lord himself, but she had to at least try. A sound behind her had her pulling down her sweater sleeve and glncing about the bathroom.
"Who's there?" she asked harshly, wand pointed into the darkness.
"Lucy?"
Sighing, Lucrezia lit up her wand and right before her stood Neville Longbottom. She looked at him, feeling her throat tighten.
"What are you doing in here?"
"I could ask the same of you, Luce. This is the boy's bathroom. The closest to Gryffindor tower without having to go to the tower."
"Oh," Lucrezia said, a blush lighting up her cheeks. Neville watched with wanting, but held back from his instincs to take her into his arms. "I didnt realize. I-I should go." She walked past him and stopped only when Neville reached out and grabbed her arm, leaning his head against it lightly.
"Are you okay?" he whispered. Lucrezia felt her heart clench, and she took a shuddering breath before nodding.
"I'm fine, Nevvie," she replied, a light smile on her lips. He let her go and nodded his own head, watching her reflection in the mirror as she walked away from him.
Brown eyes were filled with concern as Neville watched Lucrezia doze off for the third time in the Double Advanced Defense. Draco had kept poking her side to keep her up, but she only proceeded to doze again. Her head rest on her arms, the dark bruise-like circles under her closed eyes standing out immensly on her pale skin.
"Miss Lestrange!" came Snape's sharp drawl as he slammed a book down on her desk. She jumped violently, knocking over her books and staring at Snape with narrowed eyes. He looked down unimpressed.
"Hospital Wing, and detention this Friday," he said simply before turning and going back to the lesson. Everyone but her table mates and Neville snickered at her misfortne as she gather her spilled things. She stood, rubbing her eyes as she shouldered her bag and left. Neville watched her the whole way, and was shocked to see Malfoy staring that way as well.
Brown eyes met gray and locked, before Malfoy looked away impassivly, not even sparing the Gryffindor his usual sneer.
Filch burst into the Slug club party, dragging along the two most famous cousins along with him. They were struggling against him, and Neville watched open mouthed as the two fought him to get free.
"Get your hands off of me, you filthy Squib!" Draco yelled, drawing attention to the trio. Neville noticed Harry watching with interest. But then again, most of the party was by now.
"Professor, I caught these two sneaking around the hall and they said they had an invite to your party," Filch said, and Lucrezia snapped her head towards him.
"Fine! We were gatecrashing! Now get you filthy hands off of me, you perv!" she said a sneer gracing her beautiful face.
At the word 'perv', Filch realeased the girl and se straightened her jumper, sneering at the man. He looked away from her, embaressed, but kept tight hold on Draco who was glaring at Snape as if he wanted to kill him.
"What would you like me to do with them, Professor?"
"Oh, it's alright to let them stay I suppose," Slughorn said, his eyes looking as if he didn't believe that at all. Lucrezia turned her glare to him and crossed her arms, raising her head as Snae spoke.
"No. I believe I will accompany them back to the Common Room, Horace," the Potions Master said, fixing the two with a look. They each glared at him before answering almost simultaniously.
"Of course, Professor." Draco yanked his arm out of the caretakers possesion and straightened his jacket, turning on his heel and leaving. Lucrezia stood still for a momet, staring at her House Head. He stared back, almost as if having a silent conversation. Then all of a sudden she turned, following her cousin and being followed by Professor Snape.
Neville straightened up and looked around for Harry, hoping to ask what he made of it all, only to see he had disappeared.
"Oi, Longbottom. Come over here, I should like some refreshments," Zabini called rudely. Neville groaned and glared, making his way over to his fellow sixth year.
Neville had caught Lucrezia off guard finally during Easter Break. For once she wasn't going home, instead she and Draco both stayed at the school. He had tried to get what happen at the Christmas party into the conversation, but she continually changed the subject.
"I just want to spend time with you while I can, Nevvie," she said quietly as they sat against the wall on the Seventh floor. "I've given in like you asked, secretly sneaking around to meet you when I could be doing so much mre productive things." She fixed him with that look that made him want her, that mischevious kitten like smile.
"More productive things than hiding with and snogging me? I don't think so," Neville said, burying his face in her neck. She whimpered and began to wriggle away, but he grabbed her hips, pulling until she landed sideways in his lap. She could feel him aginst her thigh and she moaned, before jumping up. She didn't want it to go any further, no matter how much her body was screaming for it.
"Let's go to Mystery," she said, with that same cat like grin.
"It's happend, eh?" he asked, smirking at the girl as she pulled on his hand. "You've finally gone off your rocker. Do I need to contact St. Mungos?"
She stopped tugging on his arm and glared at him. "Oh, ha ha ha. That's so hilarious, Neville. Maybe I'll get to share a room with your parents," she said, stalking away from the boy. The instant she said it, she regretted it, but she wasn't going to take it back. It's what he got for being stupid.
"Now who's the funny one?" he called after her angrily, letting his long strides catch up to her own. Roughly he grabbed her and slammed her into the wall, a mask of rage on his face. She gasped at the impact, but raised her head and glared back at him. "You went to far, Lestrange. You know it."
Lucrezia tightened her jaw and swallowed, looking up at him defiantly. "What?" she asked, her voice agahst. "Do you expect me to apologize? Thought you knew me better, Longbottom."
His hand slammed into the wall beside her head with so much force she was surprised she didn't hear bones crack. She jumped a bit and felt her heart pick up it's pace. It shouldn't of worried her. If he was going to hit her, he hit her. And besides, this was Neville. He wouldn't hurt her. And if he did, she was used to Uncle Lucius doing it all the time. But from Neville, it would be different. His brown eyes were searching her face, glare still present before finally he let his hand fall. A Malfoy worhty sneer came to his lips and he shook his head. She waited for him to say something, to do something, but he only stood there, fists clenched at his side. And then, abruptly, he turned and walked away.
She watched silently, letting out a breath she wasn't aware she had been holding. Slowly she slid down the wall and gasped her breaths in, her chest rising and falling rapidly. That was how her cousin found her against the wall on the seventh floor. He quickly made his way to her, helping her up and demanding to know what happened.
She stayed silent however, just walking beside him, head down, all the way to the Great Hall.
He did it. He had actually done it. Draco was clinging to her hand just as tightly as she was clinging to his, their hair flying back as her mum destroyed any part of the school she could get too. She danced across the tables, blowing up the point scorers, shattering windows, and just generally blowing things up. All the while screaming like the maniac she was. Snape pulled them along, leading them through the Enterence Hall just as people came flying down the stairs.
The other Death Eaters who had come through the cabinet fought off members of te Order as Potter screamed from behind them. Snape just kept them walking. Out to the grounds, where Lucrezia watched her mum burn down Hagrid's home. She had an obsession with fire as well, it seemed. She just learned all kinds of fun facts about the woman who gave birth to her. Into the forest, and out the other side.
It seemed the war had begun.
Neville stood quiet at the funeral of the best Headmaster Hogwarts had ever seen noting the absences that were there. One in particular made his chest hurt with realization.
She was gone. She hadn't chose him. He had known already, he suposed, that she would choose her family, if not just Draco and Narcissa Malfoy. But she had taken part in her Headmaster's death for them. She had murdered for them. She would murder for them. A shiver ran down his spine, as he turned away, following his Gran as he spoke to others around them.
What hurt the most was that he hadnt even spoken to her since the incedint on the seventh floor. He had walked away, muttering all sorts of bad things about her. Left her there, though at the time he was sure she deserved it, maybe it was a little harsh, scaring her as he did. And he did. He saw the fear that took over in her eyes, even as her face stayed blank. He had said something that had hurt her too, though she had gone a little far on her part.
It was something neither of them really liked to think about, he supposed. There would always be a part of them that loved their parents, n matter how lost or evil they were, but they didn't want to turn into them. It was a fear that brought them closer. He didn't want to be so lost in his mind that he couldn't recognize those he loved. She didn't want to be so lost in her obsessions that she didn't see the line between right and wrong. They didn't want to become insane. And Neville kept failing to see that she was a lot closer to that line than he was.
It's Not The War That's Changed. It's Us.
Seventh Year
She actually had the audacity. Though, if Neville really thought about it, she looked horrible. Much thinner than she ever had been, her hair was wild, not the usual wild, but a wild as if she hasn't brushed it all summer, her cheeks seemed sunken in and the bruises under her eyes showed her lack of sleep. She wasn't with the blond Malfoy family, but there was a man who had a tight grip on her shoulder as if she might run from him at any moment.
Lucrezia looked up at her father as he turned her around. He grasped her in a hug that was a little to long before kissing the top of her head. She wanted to cringe away from his touch, but knew better from the last time she had done so. Uncle Lucius had been an angel compared to her own birth father.
He gave a crooked grin and leaned in whispering. "Remember the task the Dark Lord has assigned to you, and don't mess it up. I will see you at Christmas, love." He kissed his daughters forehead once more, lingering a little too long for anyone in the near vicinities comfort and then let her go, watching as she got on the train.
It took Neville a moment before he realized who the man was, where he had seen him before. And then it took him another moment to clam himself from walking over and beating the lecherous look he sent his daughter off his face. No one should look at his Lucy like that, least of all her own father.
He sneered at the man before climbing on the train and finding a seat with Luna and Ginny. They weren't far along before the train began to slow, and then suddenly came to a stop. Neville's eyes moved from the window to the compartment in front of his own. Lucrezia sat stone still, her own eyes looking anywhere but his. Two men entered the car then, eyes roaming over the students.
"My father will hear about this!" McLaggen siad, stupidly, standing from his seat. Once again, Rudolphus Lestrange stopped by his daughter, carassing her face. Her jaw clenched and she looked away, towards Zabini, who was also pointedly looking away. Neville watched, staring in disbelief as everyone sat doing nothing.
"Hey losers!" he called, standing up himself. Rudolphus looked up and sneered at him. "He's not here." Neville stood straighter as the Death Eater moved closer. He stopped when he was right in the younger boy's face, staring at him with raised brow. He chuckled once before turning and gesturing to the other Death Eater.
He paused by his daughter again and smiled down at her. She looked up at him blank faced and he nodded before walking off the train. Slowly it started up again, conversation started quietly, but Lucrezia stayed still, staring at the wall.
Neville ached to go and hold her. To sooth the worry that was obvious in her stance. No one noticed the Death Eater's shaking lips. But Neville saw. He saw everything that had to deal with Lucy. With his Lucy.
"Professor, if I may?" Lucrezia said raising her hand, eyes on the first year students congregated at the front of the classroom.
"Ah, Lestrange. I knew I could count on you to show us how it's done," male-Carrow said with a grin. He raised his hand, beckoning forward, but Lucrezia stayed seated.
"Actually Professor, I refuse to take part in this lesson."
Everyone stared at the girl, including her professor. They couldn't believe that she had just defied him, anyone who had had ended up missing, or badly injured. She simply kept her cool gaze on the Dark Arts Teacher. He scowled at her, and cocked his head to the side.
"And why not?" he asked stiffly.
"Because, it's not helping anyone. This is a class professor," she said pushing her book forward and laceing her fingers togeher, resting her head atop them. The class waited with baited breath as she continued. All eyes were on her. "We're not really learning if the subjects are ust going to lie there and scream. It would be better to use the curse against our peers as they know as much as we do. For the curse to work you have to ctually mean it, want to ause the person pain. Therefore, it can be broken out of. So it makes preforming it on first years pointless, you idiot."
Carrow opened his mouth only to close it again. Striding down the aisle, he grabbed her by her jumper, pulling her to standng position. She looked at him, face blank and almost bored looking. She was jerked to the front of the class.
"Move out of the way!" Carrow shouted at the first years before pushing the Slytherin away from him. He pointed his wand at her and said the curse forcefully. Once again a shock ran through everyone as Lucrezia took the spell silently, shaking the slightest bit as it took over her mind. He cut it and she let out a breath and closed her eyes gasping.
When the girl opened her eyes again, Carrow was right there. She sneered and moved back a little. "Ever heard of personal space, Carrow?"
"Your mother taught you the spell well didn't she. Late night practices until you learned to suffer in silence," he said, loudly enough for it to reach the back cornters of the room. "Came in handy when daddy snuck into your room. It will work even better when I do, hmm?"
"My father-"
"Your father told me of ways to punish you, girlie." The two locked eyes, before Carrow backed away looking oer her body. He licked his lips, and Lucrezia gagged a bit in her mouth. "Detention. Tonight." He ran a hand across her jaw and that was when one of the other students had had enough.
"Leave her alone," Blaise Zabini said quietly, making everyone turn in their seats to look at him. Neville glanced back, watching the boy as he stood. "I'll take her punishment."
"I don't think that will be necessary, Zabini," came a soft drawl from the door. "Amycus, I don't believe Bellatrix would like hearing her daughter is being harrassed by the likes of you. And you would do well to remember that Miss Lestrange is Head Girl." Snape walked through the class quickly, grabbing the young girl by her arm and away from the leering Professor. The Headmaster raised his brow. "Class dismissed."
He dragged the girl out of the classroom, only pausing to grab her things. Neville jumped up, trying to quickly leave the classroom and catch the two. He made it without being seen tot he empty corridor where he could hear their argument.
"-kill him in his sleep!"
"Maybe if you did not so outrightly disrespect him," Snape replied to Lucrezia's shriek.
"He was going to make us practice on first years! The Cruciatus curse! Surely you haven't forgotton the sting of one, Snape!" Tere was a pause before a mumbled "Headmaster" was added.
"And your point is. THe class is in place to teach you the Dark Arts. I seem to remember you and your cousin complaning that that should be the class instead of defense."
"I-I... We-well Headmaster..."
"Don't tell me you've come to care for the students wellbeing, Miss Lestrange. What would your mother say?"
"I could give a flying damn what my dear mother would say, Snape," she hissed, this time without the correction. "I haven't come to care for anyone! The lesson was pointless if not used on an equal. Anyone can torture a defensless first year."
"That answer may have fooled your fellow classmates, but it does not fool me, Lestrange. Remember what your mission here is, and more importatly where your loyalties lie."
"Professor?" she asked. So Neville wasn't the only one to hear it.
"Good day, Miss Lestrange."
Neville scurried to the first hidded room he could find, glancing out from behind the tapestry as Snape passed by. He waited to hear Lucrezia's footsteps, but was surprised when instead the tapestry was pulled back to find her staring in at him, mask in place.
"You know, Longbottom. I could very well assign you detention for skipping class and listening in on a private conversation," she said her eyes dull.
Neville stared for a short moment before pulling the girl into the room and smothering her scream of protest with a kiss. She stood still, her body ridged, but with a swipe of his tongue, she melted. Just like she always did.
"I knew it," Neville said, resting his head against hers. "I knew you were doing all that on purpose. Every detention you got. To stop someone else from getting it." Lightly he fingered a cut above her right eye. Leaning forward, he kissed it lightly, feeling her lashes flutter against his chin. "Merlin, I love you."
She looked up at him quickly, eyes going wide. Biting her lip, she tried to stop the smile, but it came anyways as she took in a shuddering breath.
"I-I love you too. Bloody hell, I love you too," she said wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him throughly.
Lucrezia watched her cousin walk across the expanse of the battlefield. Voldemort hugged him. actually hugged him. Making a face, the young woman turned he head away only to have it snap back up.
"Lucrezia," came the voice of Narcissa Malfoy. She looked at the girl she had raised along with her son. She was bleeding, her little girl was bleeding. Her lips trembled as she let a small smile grace them. "Lucrezia. You too, come. Come." Much like Draco, Lucrezia looked about her and took a hesitant step forwards. Her eyes searched the people in front of her, slowly stopping as she did.
"Lucrezia Aglaia Lestrage! Get over here now!" came the wild scrrech of her mother. Immedietly she began to shake, her eyes connecting with the much crazier ones of her mother. "Now, Lucrezia!" Lucrezia ducked her head and mved forward at the same exact time that Neville reached out to her. She stopped and looked at him, her chapped lips parting, a shakey breath leaving them.
"Luce, it's okay," he whispered. He watched her bloodcovered brow raise and he held out his hand. She glanced down at it.
"LUCREZIA!" Bellatrix screamed, sounding like a banshee. Lucrezia jumped, chest heaving, wide eyes even wider. She reached out and took Nevile's hand and he pulled her to his side, stepping in front of her and looking at the woman who stood above the rest. She was staring at her daughter, ready to kill her. He squeezed her hand and limped forward.
"Neville, no," she hissed, not letting go of his hand until he pulled it away. She gulped, watching him go into the line of fire.
"I had hoped for better," the Dark Lord said with a sneer. "And what is your name?"
"Longbottom, Neville Longbottom." Bellatrix looked at her daughter and if possible her crazy eyes took on more crazy as she laughed. Lucrezia shivered, placing a hand on her wand.
"Ah, well, I'm sure we can find a place for yuo in my ranks-" he said over the laughter of his followers only to be cut off by the boy who held he Sorting Hat.
"I would like to say something first!"
"Yes, well... I'm sure we would all love to hear it."
"It doesn't matter that Harry's dead," he started.
"Stand down, Neville," Finnigan said just as quickly.
"No. People die everyday- friends, family. Yeah, we lost Harry tonight. But he's still with us... in here," he said to the rebellion, pointing to his heart. He let his eyes wander to Lucrezia, who stared at him, big eyes watering. "So is Fred. Remus. Tonks. They didn't die in vain." He turned back to Voldemort, a scowl taking over his features. "But you will! Cause your wrong! Harry's heart did beat for us! For all of us! It's not over!" With that he pulled a shining sword from the Sorting Hat, raising it just as Harry Potter rolled out of Hagrid's arms.
Lucrezia ran forward, grabbing Neville's arm and pulling him back as she heard her mother's voice erupt from the crowd.
"No come back! Cowards! Come back! Lucius, get back here! Come back!"
Immedietly, Neville flew to the trio's side, asking what to do. His hand held tightly to hers and she gasped in surpise of everything. Her left arm burned and she had the want to go back, but Neville held her. After Harry had run off, he turned to her, taking her face in his hands. She gave him a shakey smile and Neville kissed her quickly.
"Stay alive, Lestrange," he said, kissing her once more before he ran off. She gripped her wand and ran into the Great Hall just in time to stop a killing curse her mother sent to the youngest Weasley. The crazed woman turned and screeched.
"YOU! You Blood traitor! How dare you betray your mother! Your family! For the Longbottom boy!" she screamed, throwing spell after spell. All she could do was block them. Her eyes were wide and she was breathing hard, the force of each spell her mother sent sending her back steps. "Just like your filthy cousin! A disgrace to your family names!"
Suddeny she was shot with a spell, her body drying up, dehydrating. Lucrezia watched shocked as her mother was shot to peieces, crumbling like glass to the ground. Turning, she came faced to face with a homely looking red headed woman. She smiled warmly, before turning around and battaling another Death Eater who had decided to stay loyal. Lucrezia didn't know how long she fought, didn't keep count of how many she killed. She just fought. She jumped in front of younger students, took curses for people she had always been mean to. She just fought. Until finally there was no one else to fight. Everything stopped, people cheered. Her breaths came in deep gasps, hand clenching her wand tightly. She jumped as hands grabbed her from behind, until she heard the soothing voice.
"Luce. Luce, everything's okay. Your okay," he whispered and for the first time in two years, Lucrezia fell against Neville and cried. Clutching his shirt, she sobbed like a baby. He lowered them to the ground, holding the sword in one hand, his other resting on her hip as he held her. Neville smiled and tilted his head onto her own as she quieted down. "I guess I should tell you now, Lestrange. You are never getting rid of me again. So you get used to the Blood Traitor, and I'll get used to your brand of crazy."
Lucrezia looked up at the Gryffindor, laughing thorough her tears. "If that was a proposal Nevvie, I don't accept."
"Good cause it wasn't. Merlin, all you Purebloods just think everyone wants to marry you."
"I love you, Nevvie."
"I know."
Innocence And Adolescence Are One In The Same, Confusion And Distraction Tumbled Into The Beautiful Package Of Life.